bellafan 11341 Report post Posted October 29, 2016 You find someone you enjoy spending time with. You take care of her and she takes care of you. And life is very good :) 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest st*****ens**ors Report post Posted October 30, 2016 I appreciate the sentiment, and wish it were easier. Yes, it isn't complicated. Neither is lifting an engine block out of a car. But that doesn't make it easy. Simple things can be very very difficult. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OceanMassage 5357 Report post Posted October 30, 2016 Nonetheless worth pursuing:-) I appreciate the sentiment, and wish it were easier. Yes, it isn't complicated. Neither is lifting an engine block out of a car. But that doesn't make it easy. Simple things can be very very difficult. 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nntsci 11076 Report post Posted October 30, 2016 yes perhaps its not complicated for a year or two and then her desire for sex wears off (after the kids, can you blame her), and still there are kids in high school making divorce complicated and expensive, and hard on the kids... and after several session of couples counselling where you're told to set aside time for intimacy so you go on date nights with her but intimacy doesn't happen... and hey presto... here I am on Lyla while she's upstairs snoozing... and I'm seeing ladies... very discretely and hey they take care of me in a manner of speaking, and I take care of them too, in a manner of speaking, lol. Funny thing is if I take my wife on vacation we have regular sex while on vacation... back to nothing when we get home... So in the past 2 years, I've taken her to Cuba, Mexico, England, Florida, Niagara a few times, and most recently Portugal... its a very expensive way to get sex for free. Cheers 5 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ice4fun 78407 Report post Posted October 30, 2016 Nothing in life is really that complicated if you are willing to put in the effort... if there is goodwill... if there is desire... I there is commitment... What I have learned over the years is that "Love" whatever that means is just not enough... you can have deep love for someone and it can not be enough... sometimes that's because we are lazy and just don't want to put in the effort to demonstrate that love in the things that do ever day... sure we can muster up the energy to create the right environment when we are on vacation with not a worry in the world but what about that every day demonstration of our love and affection... its not a complicated thing... do the things you did when you were falling in love... it's not complicated but it is work ... and sometimes we are lazy or lack the passion... I have also learned that people who love each other deeply can also get into trouble because of the events that happen to them in life... maybe it's a family illness...maybe it's constant separation for work... maybe it is a mental health challenge... maybe it is a death... what ever the cause I have learned that life events between people who are in love affects them sometimes it pushes them together and sometimes it pushes them apart.... it's not not the love is gone it is sometimes just that the pain overwhelms it. I have learned... relationships are not complicated but they are often very difficult and if you or your partner are struggling or broken then it can be impossible. I have also learned that people going through these impossible situation still need human connections and to feel needed and valued and frankly this industry can be a great way to meet that need for human intimacy. I have also learned that this industry I also a way to have great Sex with wonderful people. So I don't judge or question... I just live and let live. 5 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nntsci 11076 Report post Posted October 30, 2016 OceanMassage said "Surely you're getting more out of those than free sex. And maybe you offer a different side of yourself too..." LOL.. Well yeah... I did get a vacation too... though the last one was mostly a business trip for me. I figure its mostly just to make sure I keep taking her on vacation... but also the absence of our (adult) kids, appointments, and the phone. She has nothing else to do... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bellafan 11341 Report post Posted October 30, 2016 My apologies - I did not express myself well. I wanted to say that life here on lyla, and in the "hobby", is fundamentally uncomplicated. I was not talking about "real" life, which I know full well can be a real bear sometimes and very complicated. I was talking about the "fantasy" life here where we can spend enjoyable moments, and share pleasure, purely and simply, with women we enjoy being with :) 8 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waterrat 1261 Report post Posted November 1, 2016 OceanMassage said "Surely you're getting more out of those than free sex. And maybe you offer a different side of yourself too..." LOL.. Well yeah... I did get a vacation too... though the last one was mostly a business trip for me. I figure its mostly just to make sure I keep taking her on vacation... but also the absence of our (adult) kids, appointments, and the phone. She has nothing else to do... Sometimes it is not because she has nothing else to do and it is more that she is not worried about 1000 other things that kill the mood. Vacations are great for being able to focus on each other. Unfortunately, the other 50 weeks of the year if we do not focus on pleasure and passion we become hard, cold and resentful. Add to that hormonal changes and date nights become an awkward chore. Visiting an MP, SP is less complicated than having an affair and if other parts of the marriage are ok and it keeps the marriage together, it is a lot cheaper and traumatic than divorce. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Boomer 33202 Report post Posted November 1, 2016 No such thing as free, it's a two way street and about finding the right time and incentive, whether it's a vacation or simply taking the time to do some of the chores. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
daredevil8888 407 Report post Posted November 2, 2016 Not complicated: I show up at one of my regular spots and a lady I have frequented comes over gives me a hug, kiss and appears very happy to see me. Complicated: Wife I will make worth your while if you do chore X. Chore X completed, worth my while turns out to mean worth her while, less so for me. The not complicated is about the only thing that helps me survive the complicated. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nntsci 11076 Report post Posted November 5, 2016 Ok... Now that I get it.. Its true... when you find someone that you can really connect with its not complicated at all. The Lady I've been seeing lately is a joy to be with. For a couple hours the rest of the world disappears. She's told me she looks forward to seeing me as well... away from the stress of her life. Additional Comments: "Exactly, and for those precious moments life is very good for both of you :)" Indeed it is good; very good... wish it could happen more often, but then it wouldn't be so special 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
