MiaBella 10988 Report post Posted December 15, 2010 Hey Victoria, I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I've had a similar situation happen with a Very Obsessive, Stalker type, that had persisted for about a year. He used many different emails, phone numbers, names, etc. and for a long time I was paranoid to work or even walk in and out of my old incall location. As a result, I learned a few things I could do to protect myself without losing all my clients out of paranoia. If you would like some info, please feel free to contact me for more info. What you're going through is really awful and I feel for you. I wish you the best. xox Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VictoriaJolie 64127 Report post Posted January 14, 2011 Thanks everyone for your words!I really appreciate it! I didn't want to post right away again as i want to see if somehow those people would have read this post.Unfortunatly one of them haven't read as for the other i will only know when i tour that area again. Well the update is the obviously what i feel is not respected neither than follow. i am currently in the area of one of the person and i am now aware he has create 4 persona to be able to see me..I cannot reveal how i know it is him but i know and thankfully to the help of friend in this industry. While everyone told me i should not penalize others for him it make my bussiness hard to process as it almost make me paranoid which i do not wish to conduct my bussiness that way and it is not fair for others..So i guess i will just drop this city which is St-john's NF.It is sad but i cannot start asking the same requirements i ask in the usa because one person is mentally not capable to understand NO as additional comments: i do screen my clients i require many informations my booking requirement is very clear VJ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
redmachine 1916 Report post Posted January 14, 2011 i do screen my clients i require many informations my booking requirement is very clearVJ I found your booking requirements very clear and easy as you say. Simply provided the information requested and 24 hours later I'm walking into paradise. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VictoriaJolie 64127 Report post Posted January 14, 2011 I found your booking requirements very clear and easy as you say. Simply provided the information requested and 24 hours later I'm walking into paradise. Because your email contained all informations clearly and you had a glowing reference my dear :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LeeRichards 177238 Report post Posted January 18, 2011 Real shame you are having to deal with that. I am not sure why someone would want to be with you if you had absolutely no desire to be with them. I know I wouldn't want to be. Nobody likes to hear that they are not desireable, but it is an everyday part of life to hear no...lol...I suspect some guys feel that as an SP you should just automatically have to see them. I don't. You ladies are normal every day people just like me everyone else and are entitled to make the same decisions as anyone else. say yes, no or maybe or take a hike and it needs to be accepted. Once again sorry to hear you ladies have to deal with that. The fine ladies I have met to date have been really great, genuine and fun to be with. So I like to see you happy so you come back. :grin: If you say no to a second visit then Hey...I get it! Anyways hope that made a little bit of sense...lol... And fyi...I am from Manitoba so hopefully that doesn't deter you from coming here again!! 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest s******ecan**** Report post Posted January 18, 2011 Reading your posts Victoria it has obviously been and continues to be a difficult situation. Its too bad you had to drop the city but in the end you have to feel secure first and foremost so don't second guess yourself. You did the right thing. As to why someone like this would want to be with an SP who is reluctant to see them...clearly something is out of whack so the normal rational thoughts we take for granted do not apply. These guys probably think they can "win he over" once they meet in person, or feel that "the customer is always right" or maybe they want to see her all the more because she is denying them. Who knows but one thing is clear, this sort of behaviour is disturbing. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bendex 653 Report post Posted January 18, 2011 Victoria you are absolutely within your rights to choose who you want to see. I make a point of asking an SP to feel completely free to tell me anything I say or do that makes them feel uncomfortable. In order for an appointment to be enjoyable for both parties, there has to be complete trust, respect and openness. It is unacceptable that you have been put in these situations. I have not had an SP tell me they do not want to see me again, but if they did for any reason I would respect those wishes. I'm sure the three men you are talking about have serious rejection issues. You have my support and I'm sure the support of all the good members of Cerb. Take whatever steps necessary to ensure your safety and make sure you make the cerb community aware of any further situations you face. take care, Bendex Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
big AL 350 Report post Posted January 19, 2011 I have been dealing with a situation for quite a while and now i am having the 2 same situation in a different regions..I am curious of your opinions...thoughs... If i feel that someone is not compatible to me...someone that has done something that i considere a no no...I tell them that i do not wish to see them...Why is it so hard for some to understand that and respect my decision?The first situation has been in manitoba....It is getting ridiculous to the point of changing email,name,phone number and not having static IP and having mutiple handles.. The other situation has been calling every week mutiple time a week at any time to solicitate that i visit his city...Now changing emails and name... a third situation the person nearly harass me on 5 different names and emails to get banned from here not wanting to fit my requirements but insist on meeting I have notice in past tread that some of you(gents) have comment that if a girl refuse to see you..*** this you would still try to see her and sneak in by changing name...etc... Does it mean to some of you that we aren't allow to choose who we see..That if we feel that someone have a stalkish personality or disrespectful,that is simply not compatible and the app will be miserable that we have no choice to not see you?Yes i can understand that maybe i said maybe i could have a wrong impression of the person but why insisting in a sneaky way? I am so confuse as for me if someone clearly stated to me not wanting to be in my compagny i cannot even imagine how a session could be great...Maybe i am not soly bussiness...But seeing the behavior described before really discusted me and make me despite those people..hate them without even knowing them.... It does not want me to give you the time of you life ..Far from it to be polite I am currently in a dilemma...Getting my booking requirements more stick for those 2 regions and penalize many nice gents... Or.......... You inputs would be appreciate VJ So sorry you had to go through this. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Akhenaton 221 Report post Posted January 20, 2011 Personally I'd rather be told no than be ignored. I can handle a no but being ignored is just plain rude in my view. Not sure why some one would want to see a provider who didn't want to see them. Doesn't seem like fun to me. I fully agree there, being ignored sends the message "your not worth my time", not good from any vantage point. Now, once you get a no, this is not the "playing hard to get" of the dating scene folks, this is a (albeit very personal) business. And sps see themselves (rightfully) as self employed, thus every engagement is in effect a business transaction for them, if some red flags go up (rightfully or wrongfully) and they refuse to see you, you either move on (unless you are a nut case, likely the best option for both of you), you can ask the sp why, but if you get an "i just don't want to", go back to the best option above... point is, there are many SPs, if the sp is "too picky' to the point she sees no one, well, that is in effect her problem, but the choice to enter into a transaction or not is as much their right as yours (BTW, have you seen the other threads about some SPs calling clients, look at how those folks where peeved, well same here... My pet peeve this year has been what I call the tyranny of the minority. When the minority screws up it's the majority whom seem to pay the price. And that doesn't seem fair some how. Peace MG Sadly, I think that's the majority's all time peeve my friend, sadly again, welcome to our ranks... yes it's always the few tyrants that cause the most grief for the many. Victoria, you are a classy lady, and well, having said no, I am truly not sure what else you can go. Sadly this causes you increased expenses, which will at some point have to be passed on (yes Mr stalker, that means to you too !). the few tips I have are actually "tyrant bandaids" more then actual help. Like so many others, you may want to buy cheap throwaway phones, maybe even use them as a forwarding point (you auto forward the cheap phone to your actual B phone(make sure the provider does not display the actual forwarded to number (yes, some do)). Another would be using an appointment applet on your site, and only allowing that path for new clients or inquiries. Cumbersome, but at least you do prevent your back-end business to suffer. Once an initial meeting has occured, you can allow the client to get a username and password for your site and perhaps have access to a "priority" email / contact list, but still not your primary tools. Again, cumbersome, but perhaps it would buy you some peace and quiet. At any rate, I hope this stops and the people in question grow up. Hopefully this does not color every nice gent who would simply let this drop. Take care, and best wishes :) A Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
