How do you ask..

[Guest J******72]

This may be a question for the ladies, but anyone, feel free to chime in: When meeting a SP for the first time, how can a gentleman respectfully confirm what services they do and don't offer, without making anyone uncomfortable? I'm sure many SPs receive a lot of unpleasant correspondence, and we don't need to make their jobs harder, but we also want to avoid any disappointment. Is it ok to ask before you meet them, "Do you offer gfe w/msog, dfk, etc", or is it better to say "I'm looking for gfe w/msog, dfk, is that ok with you?" We all know the acronyms, but I feel like it's wrong to use them. Or am I off base? Ladies?

[quick25 137]

Man this sounds like me when I first started. Well my first time I was there, we were in the room and I did ask what she offered. Which as you said was a little weird saying that. But she was so good about it and told me. But most of the time before I go I make sure I know what she offers such as looking at her site or reading reco's. But if your not totally sure I usually just ask a sp throught txt ( if they offer that), you can also ask on the phone(most of the time). To this day I still sometimes ask just in case, because some sp's just put a FS or gfe, so I just ask what is included I find that has always worked for me.

 

 

 

This may be a question for the ladies, but anyone, feel free to chime in: When meeting a SP for the first time, how can a gentleman respectfully confirm what services they do and don't offer, without making anyone uncomfortable? I'm sure many SPs receive a lot of unpleasant correspondence, and we don't need to make their jobs harder, but we also want to avoid any disappointment. Is it ok to ask before you meet them, "Do you offer gfe w/msog, dfk, etc", or is it better to say "I'm looking for gfe w/msog, dfk, is that ok with you?" We all know the acronyms, but I feel like it's wrong to use them. Or am I off base? Ladies?

[Guest J******72]

Thanks. If anything is uncertain, I'll inquire tactfully prior to meeting.

 

I've see ladies mention what they don't do, which is good. I'm pretty plain vanilla, and have never been looking for the things they don't do, but it's good to know boundaries. The recommendation boards like this help, as it's good to know what someone may like, YMMV notwithstanding; it's always better when we can reciprocate the enjoyment. That comes as both people become comfortable with each other, establish trust.. oh my, that's a relationship! :razz:

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

... We all know the acronyms, but I feel like it's wrong to use them. Or am I off base? ...

 

The key thing is respect and politeness. All else is window dressing.

 

As for the acronym part, I don't think that there's anything "wrong" in using acronyms in communications. They're standard lingo after all, and I'd think you're much less likely to rub a lady the wrong way through their use than in using other alternative terms. That said, there are all kinds of folks, and inevitably some ladies will find some of the acronyms distasteful. But speaking plainly is important and entirely appropriate; it should not be objectionable in itself.

 

If you find yourself in a situation where you feel that it's important to you to ask about specific services, conduct yourself according to the situation. Not all situations are equivalent:

 

If a lady advertises but states nothing of her services, then an appropriate approach might be to ask "What do you offer?" First, listen to (or read) her response to get a feel for the type of language, terms, or acronyms she uses to describe her services. This is the language she is comfortable with. Adjust your terminology to mirror hers in any follow-up questions you have, and the result should be that she will hear nothing from you that makes her uncomfortable.

 

If a lady advertises using general terms (such as "GFE"), then your asking "What does that include?" is a good way to both gather information and also hear from her what terminology or acronyms she is most comfortable with. Again, adjust your lingo to hers.

 

If a lady advertises specific lists of services, ("BBBJ, MSOG", etc.), than you already see what she offers and can see how comfortable she is with the use of specific acronyms. Once again, following her lead should yield good results.

 

(Note that if a lady has gone to the trouble of compiling a list of detailed services in her ads, it is still appropriate for you to ask about rates and services, but you should mention to her at the same time that you have indeed read her ad, and would just like to "confirm" the availability of whatever service in the ad is of importance to you. This lets her know you have read her ad carefully and aren't just randomly kicking tires -- otherwise, some ladies may conclude that you're a time-waster and think that you're not really making a serious inquiry.)

 

Again, the important theme is respect and politeness. People are all different, and no matter how careful or benign your approach, someone at some time will take offence. That's inevitable in all aspects of life, and all part of being human (** shrug**).

[Guest al****s]

I much prefer a discussion beforehand for both parties to express their wants and boundaries. I want the best time possible when with a gentleman, so communication prior to meeting is paramount...acronyms are fine in my books...IMHO.

 

alexis...xoxo

[namssa 562]

That is a very good question, especially if you are new to the hobby. It shows you care about the ladies and how you approach them, good signs for a pooner.

 

I started in this hobby about 4 years ago and the first few things that I figured out by reading forums is that clear, polite communication is a must and that if you want have a good/great session you need to show these ladies respect.

 

WIT and alexiss hit the nail on the head with their responses. I suggest that you may want to read their posts a few times and ensure that you get the full impact of what they say.

 

 

When you do contact a SP, ensure that you are polite and respectful in your wording. Most of the ladies have read many emails, texts and PM's, received phone calls that have asked for many things and sometimes not in the wording possible. So they have heard it all before and are not going to be turned off if you politely ask about what is on their menu or what is included with a GFE or something as such.

 

Also, make sure you are clear and concise in what you ask and don't play games like some guys do. They are very busy and have lots of communications going on and they would prefer to deal with a guy they feel is a decent communicator and values them as people.

 

Really, just treat them as any other professional that you would deal with and you will be fine. The concept is the same, just the product or the service is rather unique.

 

 

 

This may be a question for the ladies, but anyone, feel free to chime in: When meeting a SP for the first time, how can a gentleman respectfully confirm what services they do and don't offer, without making anyone uncomfortable?

[2tuff2tame 247]

Like some of the others said. Always ask the lady before hand so you both know what to expect. Most ladies will tell you straight up what they do or don't do. It may make for an awkward moment or two if you came up with something that was not discussed before hand.

[roamingguy 300292]

When I started, if not stated in their website/profile, I would ask if they provided the services that I would like...using the acronymns.

Now I (unless posted) ask what is off limits, since you have to respect the lady's boundries. But most of my questions focus around the meeting (preferred method of contact, reference if needed, which hotel acceptable,

refreshments etc, clothing request etc)

But no matter what, always be respectfull

RG

[MiaBella 10988]

This is always something that comes up, no matter how long you have, or have not been into this hobby.

I think I can speak for many ladies when I say that discussions through PM, phone, or email are always good and can build the chemistry, as well as help communicate all the do's and don'ts of the date.

I have no problem with the abbreviations. I think they are a clear way to clear up what is on the menu.

HOWEVER, I do find that some questions can be conveyed in a rude way. Ex. "Hey babe, just wondering if I can drop a load on your face and tits" This is NOT acceptable. Not only will you likely not get what you are looking for, you'll probably get a rep for being a jerk with the beautiful ladies on this board.

Honesty is the best policy. If you ask for what you're looking for, you're more likely to get it. Personally, I strive to be the Ultimate Fantasy for every client I see, and so I make an effort to ask before hand, "what are some of the things you enjoy?", or "is there anything special I can do to make our time together unforgettable?".

Get to know the lady before you see each other. It is sure to make your time together exactly what you are looking for.;)

[Katherine of Halifax 113932]

Very well said, I could not agree more. This is exactly how I like to see things happen. This ensures our valuable clients get exactly what they are looking for and have a fantastic time. And being polite in your request will gain you much mileage, in my car anyway!!

[Guest J******72]

Wow, everyone, thanks for the well thought-out responses. I'm new to this community, and am quite surprised that so many people took the time to respond. That's awesome - thanks!!

[superjackjujitsu 140]

When I started, if not stated in their website/profile, I would ask if they provided the services that I would like...using the acronymns.

Now I (unless posted) ask what is off limits, since you have to respect the lady's boundries. But most of my questions focus around the meeting (preferred method of contact, reference if needed, which hotel acceptable,

refreshments etc, clothing request etc)

But no matter what, always be respectfull

RG

 

Roamingguy, when you say acronymns. is there a list on this site explain what they stand for. I am new to this site. I am having hard time to figure them out.

[namssa 562]

So true, Cathy hfxdom, I have proven that being polite, friendly and having a good sense of humour can get you some great mileage at times. I practice this with every lady that I see and the karma in return has been fantastic to say the least, and I do appreciate the "extra's " that the ladies provide from time to time, it is never expected....but great when it happens.

 

Just a note to the guys that you should not expect favours from the ladies when you are nice, polite, friendly, etc. that is just part of being a pooner, IMHO. Favours that may be available are very much a YMMV thing and can vary greatly. Do it because it is the right thing to do, with no expectations and practice it often and karma will look favourably upon you.

 

This ensures our valuable clients get exactly what they are looking for and have a fantastic time. And being polite in your request will gain you much mileage, in my car anyway!!

 

 

 

 

Here is the link to acronyms for you to access when you are unsure what they mean. The list is pretty comprehensive.

 

http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=1311

 

Roamingguy, when you say acronymns. is there a list on this site explain what they stand for. I am new to this site. I am having hard time to figure them out.

[cat 262460]

In our society today we feel the need to get value for investment and we have been conditioned to look at the "facts" to ensure we get what we pay for. Our industry is a little different because we are selling intimate encounters that include characteristics that are difficult to quantify. Our minds are so busy telling us what we "want" or "need", but how often do we stop the mind chatter and just allow the moment to supply all the necessities without judging it?

 

I have a different view of "services" offered. I have never listed an acronym nor will I ever. If someone has a script in their head on how our visit will play out, there is pretty good chance we are not compatible. As I have said before, there are no games that I don't enjoy; but there are people I will not play them with. There are also times when the situation calls for something else. I prefer to let the moment dictate what is going to happen. In the far past, I have shown guests to the door after we have spent some time talking because it was clear we were not on the same page. I have learned that a request accompanied by a list or a script is one I should refer to another provider. I prefer to let encounters play out because if I remove the thoughts and simply let the moment dictate it is always a spectacular experience.

 

I gently suggest that if you choose a quality provider and go in with an open mind your experience will always satiate and expand your awareness of what is truly gratifying in any situation. I know this may sound lofty or high handed, but it isn't. It's really quite simple and makes life so much more...

 

cat

[roamingguy 300292]

Roamingguy, when you say acronymns. is there a list on this site explain what they stand for. I am new to this site. I am having hard time to figure them out.

 

Namssa beat me to it. The link in his post will assist you

RG

[Guest J******72]

Cat, I totally agree. I'm definitely not trying to get "value for my money", because that's totally not what this experience is about, and people that have that mindset may be new to this, or are focused on the wrong things - if you're looking for a menu of things, you may not have the best experience. Thanks for making that point.

 

I'd like to try to better explain why I asked the original question (I'm going to use acronyms here, though). In searching for a SP, we read postings, ask fellow hobbyists questions, read recommendations, etc. We see that, for example, provider XYZ provides GFE, with LK but not, say, DFK. Maybe DFK is something that's really intimate to me, and that I'm really looking for that will help me make that personal connection in a GFE. If I know it's not offered, that's not necessarily a bad thing. At least if I know her boundaries, I can better respect them and her. Regardless of what is listed (and I think more than a few of you made this point), nothing should be expected.

 

I didn't think of this when I created the topic, but you're right, once you find a SP you share chemistry, trust and compatibility with (it goes both ways!), the rest really doesn't matter. Find a provider that you're compatible with, go in with an open mind, be respectful, have fun, and things will be ok. You don't need a menu of things, and that definitely wasn't my intent - I tend to over think things that are simple :)