"Non-pro" and judgment of sex work

[Loralee Reach 245]

"Sex is getting to be known publicly"....right? wow, after all is almost a grown child....it will be able to support itself soon....no way, it is a spoiled child kept out of conversaions in the family, kept out of outings and kept out of information.....

However CL is closed in USA and after in Canada (we allways follow our Big Bro). why? because sex work is always being "mistreated, justified, mistified, criticized, analized, penalized, and most horribly "assumed to be offered and taken by Low class individuals with depraved minds and working against the "family")

It is lovely to express ideas and is most encouraging to take the veil of the eyes of those who do not see clearly, however, reading all the time about the feminist side to it is not compelling.

There is a masculine side a feminine side a family side a financial side and a rewarding side to it.

If we take the hypocrisy from our daily lifes we could talk more openly and everywhere about sex...about the prostitute who offers a great sensual experience, about the time our friend xx and his wife got when visiting xx and learned how to be themseves mor intimate.

If we contribute to the fact of discrimination we will get more discrimination. Patriarchal societies came after matriarchal societies and I read something about how children nowadays are in charge of the society we live in.....

In other words

I have my UTMOST RESPECT FOR MEGAN and my response was not towards her opening thread, rather to the way it developed, as many others in a way that makes people feel we are a bunch of feminists prostitutes hating man and making a living off them.

I apologize to Cowboy kenny because he is in my list of wonderful, but I hope is understood that my point is not not to discuss the sex controversies, rather to discuss it POSITIVELY and discourage the growing of mold in the brain....sex is a natural thing condemned to in the graveyards and dark alleys if we do not start to talk openly about it.

One of my clients deals with divorce issues all the time and he has told me something I wont forget:

"men call it cheating when they involve the heart in a relationship...when seeing an SP they call it "release"; Women call it cheating when their significant others get an affair and...believe it or not they get ferociously offended, appalled, vicious if the guy went with SPs.."

 

NOW MY APOLOGIES TO THOSE I DID OFFEND....no intention was in me to do so!

loralee

 

Additional Comments:

Rick...I have studied that pyramid while in University with a very detailed professor.....

it does not say SEX FOR SALE

Merry Christmas

loralee

[VictoriaJolie 64127]

I have observe the same thing on those sites...further when i was in a relationship i was part of swingers site.I had few gents contacting offering to spoil me by paying for a trip,etc...They were one that was quite insisting of meeting me on his profile it was saying that he doesn't "share" his body with everyone and anyone..I got the feeling that he was like guys here that look for companionship but on the wrong site and no wanting to compensate time for money but gifts.And personally i did not considere that the offer was up to what he was looking for(was cheap).

 

As Cat and others mentionned at some points most women will prostitute themself..Some leave in a golden cage,some have ambitions that will drive to do things...

There is a big judgement of who hire a prostitute....I even had that talk with my mom of when she would say:" well what was his issue"and responded nothing..Mom people don't necessarly need to hire me because they have problem or are married...Some find it less complicate than involving themself in a relationship.

It's unfortunate but i have to agree with some others here that mention that often men that are looking for non-pro are taking advantage of the girl ,having more control over the liaison,compensation is usually not fair enough for time/control something that most sp's would never agree

 

Thanks for bringing that subject i find it quite interesting!

VJ

[Guest O***wa**W]

I hear your rant...

I think they are also looking for that non-pro because of afew reasons... one is regulars. If they wanted something consistantly lets say every 3days or 4 days the schedual can be pretty tight with a full time sex working with her regular schedual she already has. I can understand when a regular wants to see you and other appointments make him wait for another day.

Also you can also agree if someone is non-pro they wouldnt be involved with some of the crazy life in this industry.

I am sure there are others but that would be the view I see of it.

 

 

These were my thoughts. In many cases I see it used by those looking for a one time, or one on one sort of situation, not by those who do it professionally/full time.

[VedaSloan 119179]

OST RESPECT FOR MEGAN and my response was not towards her opening thread, rather to the way it developed, as many others in a way that makes people feel we are a bunch of feminists prostitutes hating man and making a living off them.

 

 

Additional Comments:

Rick...I have studied that pyramid while in University with a very detailed professor.....

it does not say SEX FOR SALE

Merry Christmas

loralee

 

Maybe I missed this somewhere, but in this entire thread did anyone bring up feminism at all? So why would anyone think we're a bunch of "feminist prostitutes hating men and making a living off them"?

 

And uh, I don't care who you studied that pyramid with, it very clearly states that "sex" is a physiological need. It may not say "sex for sale" but EVERYONE on earth requires sex and sexual intimacy, which is why prostitutes exist in the first place. So that any person, provided they are respectful, can get laid.

[fortunateone 156618]

I agree, the use of nonpro is very irritating to me. You're a nonpro until you get paid, and you can never be a nonpro more than once lol. I tend to think as others do that guys looking for the non-pro or seeking out those ads are doing so because the "pros" see right thru them, won't let them get away with anything, and typically in my mind these guys are looking to get away with something, and a reduced rate. They want someone who does not know not to provide certain services, not to understand their own worth, and not to have other reasons to watch the time, and who compare a hundred bucks for a few hours is way better than 50 bucks for working a straight job for 6 hours.

 

On the other hand, I've seen lots of pros use the nonpro as an advertising tool, to attract these guys. When they provide rates, you will find they are by the hour and pretty standard lol. They may be trying to appeal to the guy who is uncomfortable with the idea of pay for play, who wants to believe he is seeing someone with little experience, like himself, and maybe the illusion she needs him more than he needs her, that he is "helping her out".

 

The Sugar Daddy wants to feel important. He tends to be older, and likes to have someone younger and pretty to go out with and spend time with, something like a trophy to show off. she is compensated by not having to deal with multiple clients, advertising, schedules, etc etc, and can (usually) concentrate on her education or the non-money making thing she does (maybe artist, etc). Her expenses and an allowance are paid; and they have an arrangement of the # of visits and when and for how long already set up. Maybe she goes pro and sees other clients, but usually not. A real professional SB is doing this so she does not have to see multiple guys, regardless of the increased income it would provide.

 

Personally, I find it anti-pro-sex-work, this sort of nonpro and/or SD/SB setups. They seem to work on stereotypes of sex workers being bad, or sketchy, or hard. I think that sex workers as independent business owners are the epitome of "radical feminists" lol.

[Apex2006 1071]

The whole idea of convincing a woman to give up her body for cash seems to give some guys a feeling of power and superiority over that woman. Lots of porn?s have been on this very topic.

The idea of picking up a woman that is not into the idea of cash for sex and finding out just how much money it takes to be able to get in her panties is a huge turn on for some guys. They will also make the woman tell them they love cock for cash and make them admit that they are "sluts" or "Ho's" (Please excuse the language, just a way to explain and not how I think)

Also there are lots of men that are out just to prove that women will do anything for money. That too is a way to make them seem more powerful than the rest of the people who are not as wealthy as they are.

So the guys that are looking to do this just don't get off on being with an expert. They like to think that they have ruined the purity of a woman's morals. This is especially true with married women!

PLEASE REMEMBER THAT THESE ARE NOT MY THOUGHTS! But being a guy and having lots of different kind of friends, I kind of know what is going in there heads. One of my buddies is still doing this and he is probably a woman hater and brags to all the guys every time he does it and calls them all sluts.

AGAIN, NOT WHAT I THINK BUT YOU ASKED WHY MEN DO THIS.

[Megan'sTouch 23875]

You bring up some very interesting points, Apex.

[Apex2006 1071]

You bring up some very interesting points' date=' Apex.[/quote']

 

 

I`m just gining the man`s POV

[bangminton 145]

Ladies, don't forget about the students who need to supplement their tuition fee, rent what have you. I have had the pleasure of meeting a few over the years courtesy of CL (and other sites) and it has always been an enjoyable experience for both parties.

 

I was a student at one point and absolutely had no problem donating something for a mutually-beneficial arrangement (sound like I am copying and pasting straight from those ads LOL). I have kept in touch with some of them over the years and let's just say they have all moved on with their life but the memories are priceless.

 

I posted in the CL thread that CL does serve a nice market in our society and I hope other sites will step up to fill the void.

 

My 2 cents.

[VictoriaJolie 64127]

Ladies, don't forget about the students who need to supplement their tuition fee, rent what have you. I have had the pleasure of meeting a few over the years courtesy of CL (and other sites) and it has always been an enjoyable experience for both parties.

 

There are student here on cerb and on other paying sites...They work part time but don't call themself non-pro

[bangminton 145]

There are student here on cerb and on other paying sites...They work part time but don't call themself non-pro

 

understood Victoria. I was simply saying CL provided an easy and convenient avenue for these students to look for what they want and probably vice versa. I don't judge people based on the term *non-pro*, that is entirely their prerogative.

 

And you know what to me it is a moot point anyway because if you don't have a good attitude to go with it, you probably won't go anywhere, pro or non-pro.

[Reddog01 30280]

I have found this thread interesting, especially the thought that somehow SBs are classified or looked at as non-pro or being taken advantage of somehow in an agreed arrangement. I always thought SBs (regardless of their sexual experience) were always treated as fortunateone has described. Maybe if you really look at it they might if be considered - more pro - in some cases.

 

The Sugar Daddy wants to feel important. He tends to be older, and likes to have someone younger and pretty to go out with and spend time with, something like a trophy to show off. she is compensated by not having to deal with multiple clients, advertising, schedules, etc etc, and can (usually) concentrate on her education or the non-money making thing she does (maybe artist, etc). Her expenses and an allowance are paid; and they have an arrangement of the # of visits and when and for how long already set up. Maybe she goes pro and sees other clients, but usually not. A real professional SB is doing this so she does not have to see multiple guys, regardless of the increased income it would provide.

 

However, I don’t think “all” SDs do it to feel important or do it to dominate a woman. There are a multitude of reasons. The bottom line is I think a SD is supposed to be a reliable source of income that the SB can count on to live her life in line with her expectations. Conversely the SD counts on the SB to be there for him within the terms of their mutually accepted agreement.

[Nicolette Vaughn 294340]

Having been in one of thee arrangements, the mind games and attempted control or posessiveness an SD sometimes wants to have in unbearable. I could tell you countless stories within the span of one year and it was not good. At least this has been my experience. I was a pro walking into that situation and it was definitely an eye opener. It is something I will never get involved with again nor will I offer clients a retainer.

 

These arrangements are more trouble than they are worth and I would prefer to be a "pro" even though it is often portrayed by society as immoral, demeaning to women, etc compared to a sugar baby who is still trading sex for money or material items. No one controls me and the person in the arrangement didn't get to either. Although he sure tried!

 

Sure it was great money and reliable but often times they will slip up and not stick to the arrangement which means you have to a person who is firm or assertive or they will walk all over you. I am my own person and to be a pro is much more fulfilling both personally and on the job. No emotional or mental headaches after the person leaves. No one following you or accusing you of seeing other clients.

[renegade 11027]

I answered an ad from a So called sugar baby first out of curiousity,and partially because she told a good story and i,m a bit of a softie and thirdly at the time i was not enjoying the process of finding someone i could see on a more regular basis. She was a single mom going back to school in her late twenties,she was attractive well spoken and seemed quite genuine. I agreed to meet her to see if we had some common ground and we had lunch. She was better looking in person and very well read she seemed to know exactly what she wanted and what she was willing to provide in return,she felt that if she could not find a benefactor so to speak she would probably have to transition to an escort type of service to ensure adequate income.I was sold !! We agreed to a set of ground rules and i began to see her , I must admit had our relationship stayed that way i,d still be seeing her now she was really great to be with,but the more i helped her the more help she required,the calls came more often and as i live a couple hundred miles away i was fronting cash but wasn,t receiving any services (i simply could not get in often enough to cash in so to speak-lol) I was getting played and knew it so i had to cut it off - i still get e-mails and calls wanting to reconnect-i see that type of relationship as far to risky now-the relationship can get blurred in a hurray and the potential for blackmail is far too great.

[Guest f***2f***]

Yes that's the other side of it. The SBs can be the abusers and manipulators as well as the SDs. It's sure making these arrangements look like they are not a very good idea.:???:

[Blondenextdoor 1625]

Like how the other ladies mentioned, out of curiosity I have responded to gentlemen on SA and CL who are looking for "non-pros". In my experience, it is because they are trying to bend rules like no protection for sex or they want to bait someone naive with significantly less money (like how someone mentioned, getting companionship for $50 for an hour). Whenever I respond to potential ads of SD's who don't want "pros" it is very eye opening and scary with certain expectations. I would consider it if it I meant someone safe and genuine but way too many bad experiences in the sugaring lifestyle for me.

[Gregsand 6116]

For me, "Non-pro" is when she's not seeking more than one arrangement at the time, when the compensation is tailor made for the needs and capacity of both involved and when it feels like a real relationship.