How to ask? without saying the words.

[jnhfxboy 590]

Recently went for a massage, not from an RMT.

 

How would you ask for an "extra" without actually soliciting using the right words?

[Katherine of Halifax 113932]

There is no way to ask an RMT for anything extra. Don't do it or expect to be asked to leave . Possibly you could be charged with sexual harassment.

[jnhfxboy 590]

There is no way to ask an RMT for anything extra. Don't do it or expect to be asked to leave . Possibly you could be charged with sexual harassment.

 

I would never attempt to ask for an "extra" from RMT.

 

I'm pretty sure that the person that I went to see recently was not an RMT. She specifically indicated she is not setup to provide receipts.

 

But just in case she is not open to options I don't want to make the situation awkward by asking because the massage rocked my world otherwise.

[Katherine of Halifax 113932]

I apologize , I misread. I thought you were trying to ask a real RMT.

[jnhfxboy 590]

I apologize , I misread. I thought you were trying to ask a real RMT.

 

No worries :-)

[Dbass34 2238]

 

But just in case she is not open to options I don't want to make the situation awkward by asking because the massage rocked my world otherwise.

 

Be creative in your questions. Work around the question, maybe as a joke for exemple, and see how she reacts. If you see no opening, stop and enjoy a great massage. If you see an opening, good luck! Just be careful to not be call for... yeah, sexual harassment.

 

There is no good answer to that, no good way to do it. It depends of your own capacity to bring it!

 

Good luck

[Gregsand 6116]

I never ask and just enjoy the surprise when she offers it or simply does it out of the blue.

[Dbass34 2238]

I never ask and just enjoy the surprise when she offers it or simply does it out of the blue.

 

I think it's the best way to approach the question.

[OceanMassage 5357]

You could ask, while you're face down, something like:

 

"I really appreciate your massages. They are really (soothing, relaxing, energizing, destressing ...) and satisfying. That being said, do you always do strictly therapeutic relaxation massages?

 

Wait for answer: if yes: say Thank you for clarifying. No harm done and she should feel safe.

 

If answer is a question such as "what do you mean", you may ask "well are you open to add on a more sensual or erotic note?" (I would love that a lot more than Do you do extra !)

 

If answer is no, I do other stuff too or the like, then go with the flow!

[Gregsand 6116]

I think it's the best way to approach the question.

 

To elaborate, it's the kind of thing you either ask from the first call/txt/email or not at all.

 

If someone doesn't want to ask in the beginning because they're afraid of a negative answer or be blocked, they're better off not asking and simply assume it's not on the table. If she feels comfortable with it and reads from a mans body behaviour that it's welcomes, she will certainly take the lead and offer it.

 

I only ask is when I got nothing to lose because the massage is not great and a repeat is very unlikely. If the massage is very good and want to keep it that way, don't ask if she doesn't offer. It will likely ruin a good thing.

[Phaedrus 209521]

You could ask, while you're face down, something like:

 

"I really appreciate your massages. They are really (soothing, relaxing, energizing, destressing ...) and satisfying. That being said, do you always do strictly therapeutic relaxation massages?

 

You could also ask right at the end of the session, before you leave. That might be better as it's clear that you're not expecting anything right now, but just asking for the future. It also has the added bonus that if she reacts badly, you can just get yourself straight out the door and never come back rather than having to endure the rest of a now-awkward massage.

[GoinDown 3669]

My guess is all virtually all non-RMT massage set ups offer extras to varying degrees. This is where the ladies make their money. If you are offered a HJ which is pretty standard in the massage business I don't think the MA would be offended if you inquired about other possible services. Just don't expect to get more.

[Gregsand 6116]

My guess is all virtually all non-RMT massage set ups offer extras to varying degrees. This is where the ladies make their money.

 

I don't agree with that. RMT's received a two year minimum massage education to be taken seriously as health professionals and allow them to write insurance receipts. If some ladies take a shorter formation to specialize in relaxation massages or other and are not recognized as RMT's, it doesn't automatically make them sex workers!

 

If you're looking for an MA that provides extras, politely ask before. But don't disrespectfully assume she'll do it because she doesn't have a diploma on the wall.

[jnhfxboy 590]

You could ask, while you're face down, something like:

 

"I really appreciate your massages. They are really (soothing, relaxing, energizing, destressing ...) and satisfying. That being said, do you always do strictly therapeutic relaxation massages?

 

Wait for answer: if yes: say Thank you for clarifying. No harm done and she should feel safe.

 

If answer is a question such as "what do you mean", you may ask "well are you open to add on a more sensual or erotic note?" (I would love that a lot more than Do you do extra !)

 

If answer is no, I do other stuff too or the like, then go with the flow!

 

 

I would say that the massage was already more sensual than theraputic relaxation. :-)

 

I like this, I think I have some ideas now.

 

Additional Comments:

To elaborate, it's the kind of thing you either ask from the first call/txt/email or not at all.

 

If someone doesn't want to ask in the beginning because they're afraid of a negative answer or be blocked, they're better off not asking and simply assume it's not on the table. If she feels comfortable with it and reads from a mans body behaviour that it's welcomes, she will certainly take the lead and offer it.

 

I only ask is when I got nothing to lose because the massage is not great and a repeat is very unlikely. If the massage is very good and want to keep it that way, don't ask if she doesn't offer. It will likely ruin a good thing.

 

I'm not so much concerned about asking and being denied. I've learned a long time ago that the only thing you'll regret more is not seizing the moment when you had the chance. I'm more concerned about the asking being considered solicitation.

[Gregsand 6116]

 

I'm not so much concerned about asking and being denied. I've learned a long time ago that the only thing you'll regret more is not seizing the moment when you had the chance. I'm more concerned about the asking being considered solicitation.

 

Yes it's solicitation and a good reason to clear the air from the start if that's what you want. It's unlikely to get you in trouble with the law but will put you on her black list if she feels insulted by it. Not sure I get the "regret more is not seizing the moment" when nothing prevent you from seeing her again and ask her if options are on the table or not. For me when a massage is very good, extras are not necessary. So, not sure why anyone would feel as they missed out on something when the primary goal was accomplished. If you need "release", just ask from the start. If it's a hard NO, you'll get your answer.

[jnhfxboy 590]

Yes it's solicitation and a good reason to clear the air from the start if that's what you want. It's unlikely to get you in trouble with the law but will put you on her black list if she feels insulted by it. Not sure I get the "regret more is not seizing the moment" when nothing prevent you from seeing her again and ask her if options are on the table or not. For me when a massage is very good, extras are not necessary. So, not sure why anyone would feel as they missed out on something when the primary goal was accomplished. If you need "release", just ask from the start. If it's a hard NO, you'll get your answer.

 

I was just attempting to make a general statement about asking questions and rejection. You will never know unless you ask. :-)

 

I will say the massage was a reaaalllly good sensual massage; and if that is all she offers then I'm totally fine with that and would continue to go back. She just seams like a great person to be around. However if she is willing to provide more that would be the icing on the cake.

[Gregsand 6116]

I was just attempting to make a general statement about asking questions and rejection. You will never know unless you ask. :-)

 

I will say the massage was a reaaalllly good sensual massage; and if that is all she offers then I'm totally fine with that and would continue to go back. She just seams like a great person to be around. However if she is willing to provide more that would be the icing on the cake.

 

There are ways to ask without looking like a perv. Like asking if she sometimes receives weird requests, see what she replies and start a conversation about it. If she shuts the door from the start, just change subject and no harm done.

[GoinDown 3669]

does trying to disguise the 'ask' in clever semantics make it less pervy ? just wondering.

[Gregsand 6116]

does trying to disguise the 'ask' in clever semantics make it less pervy ? just wondering.

 

If it's part of a conversation it's an easier sell than randomly asking. For me, I prefer getting out on the phone or email before the first contact or by email before a second session if I feel I got nothing to lose.

[jnhfxboy 590]

So I guess for my next visit I could start a conversation:

 

Me: "So .... I felt that our last massage session was pretty sensual"

 

Her: "________" ?

 

Me: "Where can we go from here?"

[Gregsand 6116]

So I guess for my next visit I could start a conversation:

 

Me: "So .... I felt that our last massage session was pretty sensual"

 

Her: "________" ?

 

Me: "Where can we go from here?"

 

Hopefully for you she's not lactose intolerant as she would certainly get sick from all the cheese in that pick up line.

 

I'm not gonna be your Cyrano and dictate how to ask certain things to a woman. Just have a normal conversation and ask questions about her work and slowly bring the topic in. Or just go for broke and ask her directly. The worst she can say is "NO".

[jnhfxboy 590]

Hopefully for you she's not lactose intolerant as she would certainly get sick from all the cheese in that pick up line.

 

I'm not gonna be your Cyrano and dictate how to ask certain things to a woman. Just have a normal conversation and ask questions about her work and slowly bring the topic in. Or just go for broke and ask her directly. The worst she can say is "NO".

 

Ah come on, some women love cheesy lines, don't they :-)

 

However, I always try to be honest and respectful!

[Gregsand 6116]

Ah come on, some women love cheesy lines, don't they :-)

 

However, I always try to be honest and respectful!

 

When they clearly offer adult services, yes. But when they try to maintain a reputation as serious health professionals, it gets old very quickly.

 

A few years ago I met a Chinese woman giving Thai massages. The real thing and not the body slide. Before the session she vented a little on how many calls she was getting from men who wanted sex and were clueless on what a real Thai massage was. I could definitely understand her point of view.