First timer questions

[redusedaj 1211]

Hoping I can get some advice from some more experienced hobbyists.

 

First, anyone else married? Has hobbying affected that in any way (positive or negative)? I'm happy with my marriage but have been with my wife since before college, so I feel I've missed out on some experiencs.

 

Aside from that, contact/discretion is obviously huge for me (as I'm sure it is everyone else). I'm, certainly not famous by any means, but am, "known" in some fairly significant circles. Point is this is the type of thing could end both a marriage and a career. I'm sure the smart answer is "then maybe you shouldn't be here" but here I am so we're over that hurdle.

 

I completely understand the SPs needs to have real information for their own safety, but also have my own safety (not physical, but financial and home life) to be concerned with. Any advice on insuring my discretion isn't violated, maybe even years after the fact?

 

Aside from that, any SP recommendations? I've been very interested in a couple of girls, MsManda, but also wonder, if I start at the top, then what?

 

Any insight is greatly appreciated.

~Red.

[BJS100 1030]

I have the same type of questions and concerns as you do. Any advice would be appreciated.

[Zachmont 3826]

Most answers will vary, but here's mine. I've been married for 25 years, and my wife is an awesome person whom I love. But. The simple fact for me is, she strongly dislikes sex, always has. We were each other's firsts, but she has some baggage which is ok, because life isn't perfect. Unfortunately, that translates into its been years for me since there has been physical intimacy.

 

Escorts have been awesome for my marriage, because they have kept me from any desire to have an affair. It cures my physical needs, but there's no risk of falling in love. I became quite good friends with someone in the business before moving to NS, but we both were well aware of our respective roles. There was zero danger of me leaving my wife for her, and I doubt she'd take me even if I did (actually, I know she wouldn't). But man, did we click sexually.

 

I understand more than you know about reservations and being known in circles. My response is a simple one... stick to established and reviewed ladies on Cerb. Literally, avoid Leoslist like the plague. Cerb ladies aren't going to mug you, blackmail you, threaten you, or bait and switch you. They don't have "managers", and you won't see them on Hollis street at 2 am. They're not dudes (surprise!) and you don't have to worry about them being drugged out on heroin.

 

With Leoslist... not saying all are, but you're playing with fire. I'd definitely lay off them, until you get your, uh, feet wet and begin to understand the system and how things work, so you'll have a better chance of spotting red flags.

 

As for the screening... these ladies are placing themselves in an exceptionally vulnerable position. You're probably physically larger than they are. Will you respect their limits? Will you stop if they say? Of course you will... they hope. I don't blame anyone in the slightest for being cautious. I'm not even talking about the scammers and time wasters, it's literally their physical safety. The Cerb ladies are not trying to be deliberately difficult, they're simply looking out for themselves. They're taking a *lot* bigger risk than you are, on a first encounter.

 

How to protect yourself? For me personally, e-transfers is a no-go. If that's a pre-req, I move on. No one gets my banking information. Similarly, I would never pay by credit card or bank card. I usually leave my wallet safely tucked away, carrying a cheapo wallet that contains just the cash for my visit (and maybe $60-100 more). No DL, no credit cards, no Blockbuster membership. Even if it's a trusted lady, I don't want an oops and my wallet falling out of my pocket, etc. I personally would never host a lady at my house if my wife is away; either go to incall (my preferred) or rent a hotel room (paper trail again, though) Not that I don't trust the lady at my house, just again, neighbors, taxi drivers, and unneeded risk. Don't use your work phone to contact ladies. Always, always, always delete your text conversations afterwards. I've never even once had an issue about a Cerb lady contacting me via text or phone without me initiating contact. I have had a non Cerb provider text me with a "hey, I'm available this week if you are" which came as a... surprise.

 

As for recommendations... there are a few threads recently about that. Lots of excellent Halifax ladies on Cerb. Go to the thread, start at A, and work your way through the alphabet :) Literally, its what I did when I arrived in town. If someone has lots of recommendations, that's a good sign. Also look who's doing the recommendations, make sure it's not a new member with like 3 posts. Make sure the recommendations are recent-ish as well, as the lady may have retired or moved.

 

Then, the advanced class stuff... take your person's name, and do a search of her name in the Halifax thread. See what else comes up. Go on the lady's home page, see if she's been active lately. See if she has photo albums, and if you like what you see.

 

Some names to get you started... in no particular order whatsoever... MsManda, Addictive Barbie (on break I think), Kylie Jane, MelanieMys, Katherine, HotCarpernterKitty, Lexy Grace, Danielle, Savannah Sol (on break).

 

I'd have included Midnite Energies in there too but, dammit, she's not taking new clients (sad rawr!). I also personally would add Alayna Rose in there, though she's not as well reviewed or as particularly well known.

 

TL;DR: if you're serious about visiting a provider, stick with established ones on this board. You're safer, and your going to have a better end result. Any screening done by the established ladies is for their safety, not to use against you.

 

G'luck, shoot me a message if I can help.

[Studio 110 by Sophia 150333]

Most answers will vary, but here's mine. I've been married for 25 years, and my wife is an awesome person whom I love. But. The simple fact for me is, she strongly dislikes sex, always has. We were each other's firsts, but she has some baggage which is ok, because life isn't perfect. Unfortunately, that translates into its been years for me since there has been physical intimacy.

 

Escorts have been awesome for my marriage, because they have kept me from any desire to have an affair. It cures my physical needs, but there's no risk of falling in love. I became quite good friends with someone in the business before moving to NS, but we both were well aware of our respective roles. There was zero danger of me leaving my wife for her, and I doubt she'd take me even if I did (actually, I know she wouldn't). But man, did we click sexually.

 

I understand more than you know about reservations and being known in circles. My response is a simple one... stick to established and reviewed ladies on Cerb. Literally, avoid Leoslist like the plague. Cerb ladies aren't going to mug you, blackmail you, threaten you, or bait and switch you. They don't have "managers", and you won't see them on Hollis street at 2 am. They're not dudes (surprise!) and you don't have to worry about them being drugged out on heroin.

 

With Leoslist... not saying all are, but you're playing with fire. I'd definitely lay off them, until you get your, uh, feet wet and begin to understand the system and how things work, so you'll have a better chance of spotting red flags.

 

As for the screening... these ladies are placing themselves in an exceptionally vulnerable position. You're probably physically larger than they are. Will you respect their limits? Will you stop if they say? Of course you will... they hope. I don't blame anyone in the slightest for being cautious. I'm not even talking about the scammers and time wasters, it's literally their physical safety. The Cerb ladies are not trying to be deliberately difficult, they're simply looking out for themselves. They're taking a *lot* bigger risk than you are, on a first encounter.

 

How to protect yourself? For me personally, e-transfers is a no-go. If that's a pre-req, I move on. No one gets my banking information. Similarly, I would never pay by credit card or bank card. I usually leave my wallet safely tucked away, carrying a cheapo wallet that contains just the cash for my visit (and maybe $60-100 more). No DL, no credit cards, no Blockbuster membership. Even if it's a trusted lady, I don't want an oops and my wallet falling out of my pocket, etc. I personally would never host a lady at my house if my wife is away; either go to incall (my preferred) or rent a hotel room (paper trail again, though) Not that I don't trust the lady at my house, just again, neighbors, taxi drivers, and unneeded risk. Don't use your work phone to contact ladies. Always, always, always delete your text conversations afterwards. I've never even once had an issue about a Cerb lady contacting me via text or phone without me initiating contact. I have had a non Cerb provider text me with a "hey, I'm available this week if you are" which came as a... surprise.

 

As for recommendations... there are a few threads recently about that. Lots of excellent Halifax ladies on Cerb. Go to the thread, start at A, and work your way through the alphabet :) Literally, its what I did when I arrived in town. If someone has lots of recommendations, that's a good sign. Also look who's doing the recommendations, make sure it's not a new member with like 3 posts. Make sure the recommendations are recent-ish as well, as the lady may have retired or moved.

 

Then, the advanced class stuff... take your person's name, and do a search of her name in the Halifax thread. See what else comes up. Go on the lady's home page, see if she's been active lately. See if she has photo albums, and if you like what you see.

 

Some names to get you started... in no particular order whatsoever... MsManda, Addictive Barbie (on break I think), Kylie Jane, MelanieMys, Katherine, HotCarpernterKitty, Lexy Grace, Danielle, Savannah Sol (on break).

 

I'd have included Midnite Energies in there too but, dammit, she's not taking new clients (sad rawr!). I also personally would add Alayna Rose in there, though she's not as well reviewed or as particularly well known.

 

TL;DR: if you're serious about visiting a provider, stick with established ones on this board. You're safer, and your going to have a better end result. Any screening done by the established ladies is for their safety, not to use against you.

 

G'luck, shoot me a message if I can help.

 

 

This is by far one of the best and honest replies on this type of thread I have ever read. Thank you for sharing so honestly your insights to the hobby!

 

As I have had many conversations with individuals and with other ladies who also are providers....we seem to come to the same conclusions.

 

1. NEVER let the hobby take away from your marriage. Financially or emotionally. DO NOT let the hobby change how you feel about your SO. This is a fantasy and a chance to explore without making your SO feel bad that she can not enjoy it too. You have a young family/marriage life and many obstacles will be overcome later on. So hold this close and precious to your heart for these days.

 

2. MAKE SURE you are seeking company with a trusted lady. Take your time, check out not ONLY the Reco threads, but also look into their posting habits. Is it ONLY ads? What about the topics they post on? Do they seem invested into their business long term or just a fly by night?

 

3. Follow protocols, when you are dealing with the above mentioned, Katherine, included rest assure that your info is safe. Start with these ladies and I am sure they also know personally others who they would recommend.

Allow the lady to guide your with patients, and just follow thier lead. upon leaving, erase ALL COMMUNICATIONS, shower ( most of us have "man soap" or BRING YOUR OWN SOAP)

 

 

 

I hope all of this is helpful, it seems like your a true gentand should have no problems with finding your way around the hobby .

CHEERS!

[Zachmont 3826]

Re: taxis vs car... when I was out west, I used almost exclusively taxis (because I was travelling through). What I found challenging was the timing. You have a 8 pm appointment. When to call for your cab? sometimes, cabs are late picking you up. Or they aren't in a hurry to get there. But, if you call them too early, and there is no delay, you're outside the place on foot 20 minutes early in. Knocking early is a HUGE no-no. Or...Once, I was 15 minutes late for an hour session, because my cabbie took a major street that even I knew to avoid. The lady was pissed I was late, I was frustrated at the cabbie, it put a damper on the session. Plus, if anything goes sideways (bait/switch, or she doesn't answer the door because she's "not ready yet", or she damands more than agreed on, or you simply have bad gut feelings) you're a lot more stuck there if you don't have a car.

 

(Side note: the odds of something going sideways with one of the board regulars is pretty slim, I.e. Nonexistent. Almost all them live in good areas, and none of them will jerk your chain. So cabs are more viable, but so is your car).

 

If you are going to cab it, I suggest when the lady gives you the address, use Google Street view to look around the area, see if there's a 7-11 or something a block away, and get the cab to take you to there for like 15 minutes early.

 

My solution personally is that in Halifax, I use my car, but I visit providers almost exclusively during the day. I don't personally feel unsafe anywhere in town at 2 pm. Not an option for everyone, but it works for me. If I'm early because traffic was light, I wait in the car a block or so away.

 

(Side note 2: I use google street view even now, so I still have an idea where to park, etc, and will recognize the place when I arrive)

 

I probably came down a bit harsh on Leolist (hey, I browse there), but I still maintain my assertion that someone starting out should begin with the established and trusted regulars here so they can learn the ropes, which will help them identify the red flags later on. Spend some time in the nice friendly hot tub, before jumping in to the deep end of the pool. For someone with above-average concern for privacy, it's just a no-brainer in my opinion. Seriously, there are so many awesome, gorgeous women on Cerb of every (legal) age and type. If there isn't someone that gets your engine running, you're a fussy man!

[redusedaj 1211]

Thanks for all of the wonderful insight, this is a much more welcoming and helpful community than I would've expected. Great idea about the wallet, tough I never really carry cash anyways and my "financial" concerns weren't about being ripped off, more about costing me my career. Taxi is a great point too, that was my plan anyways, but getting dropped off at a neat by business is brilliant.

 

One thing I am curious of is over you give the SP your name, what kind of research are they doing? I'd have no references for this sort of thing, all they'd be getting from my name is my work and hobbies. It sounds like it's pretty easy to find who you can rely on, and I'm fairly confident in my wits to choose SPs wisely, but I'm also a "worst case scenario" thinker. Like what if someone steals info from the SP (hacking an email or something). I guess there isn't really an answer to that question.

 

Anyways, thanks again for all of the insight.

[Mikeyboy 27134]

... Firstly when a new member joins and comments nicely, praises or has questions about one or more of this sites more known providers no one raises a brow to the new members motive or questions the new members thread.Yet when a new member joins and comments nicely or recommends a non-member or a less talked about provider eye brows raise and those comments are called into question and scrutinized.....

 

Comments on new providers are always welcome and encouraged. It's accounts that were created just to praise one specific lady and never post again where I question the motives for obvious reasons. It is easy for a new lady or their friend to create a fake account, post a recco and then use it in their ads. It happens all of the time. Ladies with good reputations and lots of reccos simply have no motive for doing this so I guess people give those new posters the benefit of the doubt more easily.

 

This is why the mods don't allow new accounts post reccos though. It's actually against the rules of the site for new members to post reccos. You have to actually participate in the board a bit first. This is designed to discourage shill accounts, and show that the poster is likely trustworthy. You have to have 5 real posts first and then be approved by the mods in order to make a post in the recommendation section. Unfortunately, the shill accounts get by this rule by posting reccos in non recco sections such as this one. (Quite often a screen shot of that "recco" appears in the ladies ad within minutes.)

 

I'm sure there are cases where someone was just so blown away by a lady that they ran to their computer and joined every board they can find just to sing her praises. I suspect that in most cases though, the so called reccos made by brand new posters as their one and only posts ever are actually shill.

[Zachmont 3826]

CJ: I think you misunderstood me. I'm not by any means saying don't try some of the various people, even those with few or no reviews. Again, maybe I worded it badly.

 

My message is this: IF YOU'RE STARTING OUT, start with a known quantity. Get some experience with how things work, what is normal, and what the "rules" are. This way, when you do expand your repitoire, you'll have a better developed spider sense.

 

You've never had sushi before, and decide you want to try it. You can go to the place that's been open for four years and has hundreds of five star reviews on yelp, or you can go to a place that just opened up last week. Me, I'd suggest the former to start off, to figure out if you like the taste of sushi and if it's for you. If you decide you do, absolutely, then try some other places to see if you like their way of preparing it. Because you're right, maybe you like their way better.

 

To someone starting off... for me, it's a no-brainer to start with a well-reviewed, trustworthy lady on Cerb that's going to give you a mind-blowing time. There's zero downside.