jbseeker 100 Report post Posted February 10, 2011 We're all individuals. I'm not. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pheromone125 100 Report post Posted February 11, 2011 Immanuel Kant was a real pissant Who was very rarely stable Heidegger Heidegger was a boozy beggar Who could drink you under the table David Hume could out consume Schopenhauer and Hegel And Wittgenstein was a beery swine Who was just as sloshed as Shlagel There's nothing Nietsche couldn't teachya 'bout the raisin' of the wrist Socrates himself was permanently pi-i-i-i-issed John Stuart Mill of his own free will On his half pint of shandy was particularly ill Plato they say, could stick it away Half a case of whisky every day Aristotle Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle Hobbes was fond of his dram And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart -- I drink therefore I am Yes Socrates himself is particularly mi-i-i-i-issed, A lovely little thinker but a bugger when he's pissed. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mikeyboy 27133 Report post Posted February 11, 2011 "Do you find something funny about the name...........Biggus..........Diccus?" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cato 160314 Report post Posted June 30, 2011 "Noooobody expects the Spanish Inquisition...Its two chief weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency... Its three weapons are fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency, and fanatical devotion.... Among its weaponry are such diverse elements as.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest W***ledi*Time Report post Posted June 30, 2011 Oh no, that's next door. It's being-hit-on-the-head lessons in here. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Satin 1237 Report post Posted June 30, 2011 "That rabbit has a vicious streak a mile wide" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NTF69 115 Report post Posted June 30, 2011 Now two boys have been found rubbing linseed oil into the school cormorant. Now some of you may feel that the cormorant does not play an important part in the life of the school, but I would remind you that it was presented to us by the corporation of the Town of Sudbury to commemorate Empire Day, when we try to remember the names of all those from the Sudbury area who so gallantly gave their lives to keep China British. So from now on, the cormorant is strictly OUT OF BOUNDS. Oh and Jenkins? Apparently your mother died this morning. Chaplain? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chavez 641 Report post Posted June 30, 2011 Well , you were lucky! That was luxury. We used to get up in the morning at 10 at night- which was half an hour before we went to bed- eat a hunk of dry poison-work 29 hours a day at the mill and when we got home our parents would kill us and dance around our grave singing "Glory, Glory, Hallelujah" part of the skit "the Liars" The whole thing has me rolling on the floor.I never saw the skit, only heard it once one th radio; never talked to anyone that ever heard of it ; but I don't think I imagined it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
humper 596 Report post Posted June 30, 2011 what is the velocity of an unladen swallow? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest W***ledi*Time Report post Posted June 30, 2011 ....I never saw the skit .... we used to dream of living in a corridor ... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
canuckhooker 19203 Report post Posted July 1, 2011 Just dive right for the clitoris???? How about a kiss first? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
trucido peritus lingua 2699 Report post Posted July 2, 2011 what is the velocity of an unladen swallow? What do you mean? An African or European swallow? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest o*****24 Report post Posted July 2, 2011 Are you suggesting that coconuts are migratory? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Reddog01 30280 Report post Posted July 2, 2011 (edited) What do you want? Well I was told outside that... Don't give me that, you snotty faced heap of parrot droppings! What? Shut your festering gob, you tit! Your type really makes me puke you vacuous, toffy-nosed, malodorous pervert! What? I came in here for an argument. Oh, oh oh I'm sorry, this is "abuse'. You want Room 12-A just along the corridor. Oh sorry. Thank you very much, sorry, thank you. [shuts the door] Stupid git. Edited July 2, 2011 by Reddog01 Sorry:More than one line..I will keep it short next time Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Peachka 4334 Report post Posted July 2, 2011 "Bring out your dead. Bring out your dead." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest s******ecan**** Report post Posted July 2, 2011 "Fear no Man" "I'll make you a master of LLap-Goch the secret Welsh art of self defence..." http://mzonline.com/bin/view/Python/FearNoManSketch Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andee 220524 Report post Posted July 2, 2011 Here are two... "Four *hours* to bury the cat?" "Yes, it wouldn't keep still." Have you come to arrange a holiday, or do you want a blow job? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
trucido peritus lingua 2699 Report post Posted July 3, 2011 And...always look on the bright side of life... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
furball8 100 Report post Posted July 3, 2011 "My nipples explode with delight"!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kubrickfan 12836 Report post Posted July 3, 2011 "Can do, but won't!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest 9**A***** Report post Posted July 3, 2011 Every sperm is sacred. Every sperm is great. If a sperm is wasted, God gets quite irate. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cowboy kenny 50799 Report post Posted July 3, 2011 Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, what? ... Size eight. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, no of course not, Yes... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jazzitup 5652 Report post Posted July 4, 2011 Look matey, this parrot wouldn't voom if I put 4,000 volts through it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jazzitup 5652 Report post Posted July 18, 2011 Look, tell you what, we'll eat her, if you feel a bit guilty about it after, we can dig a grave and you can throw up in it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Old Dog 179138 Report post Posted July 18, 2011 He has a wife, you know. You know what she's called? She's called... 'Incontinentia'... Incontinentia Buttocks ... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
