Cerb and Self-Awareness

[Cato 160314]

Something interesting happened to me this week. I sent a pm to a newbie welcoming her to cerb, and asking her about her interests. She replied with a list of serious topics on legal, social, and medical issues, which concern us all.

It was a very good reply. Impressive and articulate, especially for one so young.

 

This got me thinking about my own contributions on here. They tend to shy away from serious topics, and to focus on redhead polls, best bums on the planet, abs, contributing to the social groups promoting cheerleaders and spinners, and things like that. The frothy, frivolous side. Very different from my Roman namesake, the serious and austere Cato, the censor of public morals.

 

But that's why I chose the name, for the irony of it. I'm happy to be associated with the more frivolous sides of cerb, but I'm also happy that cerb provides a forum for serious and weighty discussions. I don't take part in these very often, because I'm here to leave the more sombre parts of my life behind, to play, and to write awe-struck reviews of the women I've met. I love this, but I'm grateful and appreciative to those who carry on significant exchanges on important topics.

 

May we long carry on together, "from each according to his [her] abilities," as someone famous once said.

[MightyPen 67414]

I share the sentiment.

 

Like any healthy community, CERB has many diverse aspects and people can participate in whatever parts interest them. I like to bring a sense of humour to a discussion, but at the same time I tend toward the heavier subjects and away from the frothier side. Just a matter of taste. I'm a reflective kind of guy: "What am I doing? Why am I doing that? What does that mean to me? To my partner?" and this forum offers a great place to explore those questions on a delicate subject, with a frankness that's not possible for me anywhere else.

 

For me that's the most rewarding part of the forum. Still, the lighter stuff is worth a look from time to time.

 

Yay CERB.

[mrgreen760 37785]

I seem to go the humour route mostly. It's not that I have less interest in serious topics in fact it's the exact opposite. I have wide-ranging interests in many topics areas, I think quickly on my feet and relish an animated discussion. For me that's the rub, I love everything about how technology allows us to communciate with an endless number of people but I've struggled with sublety and nuance communicationing electronically. I'm much better having those kinds of conversations face to face, it's so easy to have misunderstandings that are less likely to happen when you see a reaction immediately or you can something controversial with a smile or a wink and nod.

 

It's something I'm working on. In the mean time I'll use shout like a tweet :)

 

Peace

MG

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

Obviously there's one core reason that most everyone of us on Cerb share for being here. Other than this one common attraction, it's of course no surprise that, like any other group of people, folks here on Cerb will have widely-ranging interests. It'd be a boring life otherwise.

 

As far as "serious" issues are concerned ... fun is nothing to sneeze at, after all. Being a fun and friendly place is serious business for Cerb. It was hardly by accident that you were voted "Cerb Valued Member", Cato!!

 

And remember -- while you're here having fun on Cerb, your serious and austere namesake, having committed suicide, has been pushing up daisies these two millenia. Who's laughing now?

[Cato 160314]

Point well taken, WIT. I'm not belittling the fun side at all, just reflecting that I personally tend to steer clear of the meatier issues.

 

And I recognise that I'm deeply committed to superficiality!

[mrrnice2 157005]

As a relatively new member to CERB, I have been impressed with the contributions of its members to the forums in a multitude of different areas, from frivolous to very serious.

 

For me because of a personal situation that I have found myself in with the passing of my wife, it is causing great personal self-reflection, and that is a good thing. It has opened me up to an entire new way of thinking that I had never considered previously, nor anticipated being a part of.

 

The people that I have met face to face (and I agree that THAT is the best way to communicate) have been amazing, and reading the opinions and thoughts of the members here has been fascinating.

 

Sometimes I am too serious and looking through the general discussions I have had some great laughs escape my lips. (See the thread on embarrassing moments!)

 

So forums contributors thank you, and keep it up. I shall participate as I can, and before too long, contribute some new threads of my own.

 

I love the balance in here.

[roamingguy 300292]

Well I like the light hearted, the jokes and music threads...but I do pipe up on the meatier subjects from time to time, hopefully with a usefull comment or two

I think it's great that a board like CERB can allow such a cross section, if that's the right word of threads/posts and ideas.

And I have seen a couple other boards, CERB seems to have a sense of community and positive atmosphere that the others don't

All (well most) contributions to CERB make it the positive board it is

RG

[Alexandra-Sky 12606]

I am so down for having more conversations about issues that affect us all. In fact, I have been surprised at all the encounters I've had with clients who want to engage in political discussions with me (perhaps due to the fact that I post on my website that I'm into political activism).

 

Education can happen in so many ways<3 !

[Lowdark 5613]

Well said Alexandra

[Kubrickfan 12836]

The problem with some of the more interesting conversations, especially political conversation, is that people tend to have very strong feelings and those need to be expressed carefully here to avoid offending others. Overall, the general civility of Cerb is wonderful as is the balance of topics.

[Guest T**E******s]

The reason I joined these forums was to gain wisdom, and advise from those who paved the way before me. To keep abreast with issues that are important and pertain to pertinent aspects of my life. I can't speak to my off-line social group about; sex trade legal issues, the new decriminalization code or the medical issues that could arise (morality arguments ensue). Even if I could, why would I want the opinion of young schmucks, with no relevant experience? I appreciate the advise of some one well read, experienced and travelled. But I'm not about to strike up such a conversation with my best friends dad. :)

 

I enjoy the lighter banter, and funny jokes, but I can get most of that from my current pier group, including covered bbbj vs cbj with the advent of a more in-depth sex ed class these days. I feel sympathy towards these poor young men, they don't even have the chance to experience these things with their high school sweethearts and create those fond memories. What a pity no? At least college girls can give them hope :)

[Jazzitup 5652]

One thing I have learned here is that if something moves you, if you feel strongly about something, if something strikes you as funny, you can and should share your views or experiences in Cerb land and it will usually be well received.

[SamanthaEvans 166767]

This board stands out from every other by miles! While there aren't very many members in my area, I spend time here because of the quality of our interactions. I like the serious stuff. I like the fun and silly stuff, too. Most of all I love the general mood and the low number of trolls. It usually feels like people actually take the time to read and think about others' posts. Perhaps most important of all, it seems like a place where one can contribute to a conversation--or start one--without just attracting personal attacks. The ladies in the SP area are genuinely supportive and encouraging. And Mod, I hope it goes without saying, is the absolute best!

[LeeRichards 177238]

I enjoy both the serious side and the light hearted funny side of things on Cerb. I grab my coffee in the morning and the first place I log into is Cerb. What a great group of people!

 

I try to contribute on the serious side when I can but quite often find myself backing off on touchy subjects so as to not offend people due to the wide variation of people and opinions. I know what I want to say but can't always word it that way..lol. or sometimes find myself thinking "who the hell am I to offer my advise to this person". I do however love reading other peoples opinions and concerns and I have learned a ton!! since I have actively joined Cerb. I will contribute when I can.

 

I will continue to contribute on the light hearted side probably more often with what probably is considered my wacky sense of humor.

 

For those that need advise or perhaps comfort or piece of mind keep posting because once again Cerb is a great community with considerate and genuine people here to help.

[mrrnice2 157005]

Well said Lee.

[Cato 160314]

Thinking about the political discussions and polls that are going on on cerb, I'm glad that people treat this as a forum for these subjects. They're really important, and the outcome of the election could well affect how we are able to conduct ourselves in our hobby. (The legal threads are really interesting too, and WIT deserves special thanks for summarizing and analyzing the issues there).

 

I've decided that for me, though, even though I have strong political views of my own, I don't want to discuss them openly on cerb. Even more importantly, I don't really want to know the political views of my cerb friends. The danger is that it might become too hard to remain friends, and to share common interests, if our opinions on politics are too opposed. Our common interests in cerb affairs might suffer.

 

Maybe it's that I'm just into the fun parts of cerb, or maybe I actually take politics too seriously, but I won't be taking part in the election discussions on here, and I thought I should explain why.

 

Again, I think it's great that members want to have these discussions here, but they're not for me. It's just part of the variety that makes cerb valuable for many tastes and interests.

 

But I like my cerb friends too much to risk losing them over political arguments!

A vow of silence on this, then, from me.

[ottawaadventurer 5114]

Cato - I think this is a wise move. And I wish I had thought it through before I weighed in. One of the great things about CERB, Sex, Hobbying... is it's the great leveler... we are all here because we share something. Politics inevitably ends up being about what we do not share.

 

In the end, this community means more to me than expressing my political views here.

[Cato 160314]

I'm not trying to discourage discussion, OA. I wish I felt like I could take part; it's just I really don't want to have my opinion of cerb friends dashed or lessened if we fall out over political differences. It's entirely a personal point of view.

I commend people who do take part. Maybe I'm just using avoidance tactics.

Thanks for taking the initiative, OA.

[PistolPete 61421]

I think that is all you are doing Cato and that is your preference as well.

 

If members do not debate,sex,politic's,life in general,likes,dislikes with having a fear of loss of friendship over intellectual debates and discussions then what is the sense of even opening any thread or posting on any subject? My take on it, and why I participate.

 

Regardless of what our point of view may be.

 

Some men here only like spinners for example, me I like ALL sized and shaped women, should I be concern what the next guy/lady thinks about me? (and ask me if I really care too ;) )

 

May we all agree to disagree makes life go around, and we get a better understanding from others by opening up a little bit,even if it is about politics, or sex.

 

Maybe I'm just using avoidance tactics.

[Katherine of Halifax 113932]

I am always so pleased when people take the time to read about my interests or learn about me through my posts.

 

So many gentleman want to talk about spirituality or bodybuilding which is really core to the person I am.

 

I as well follow regular posters and its a nice feeling when you see someone that is going through something you might be able to help with. This is so much more that a sexual exchange. Yes it is somewhat of an adult chat but you can also go as deep with people as you and they are willing to go.

 

There is a lot more to life than sex folks. Did I just say that!!??

[Cato 160314]

Interesting point, Pete. Maybe I didn't make clear that I'm not at all concerned what anyone else might think about me, and that would never stop me from posting my preferences and opinions about directly cerb-related matters, but I am concerned about how my attitude toward others might change if I found out that we had sharply divergent attitudes to politics. I might feel less inclined to share information, and so on.

So for me, I'll happily talk about anything related to the hobby and our shared passions, but not things like elections.

But that's just me. I'd rather not know.

[Guest Ou**or**n]

Variety is the spice of life. Your contributions of enthusiasm, humour and constant admiration for the female form are fantastic. I personally like to wade into heavy conversations but that's my style. We're all different and diversity is one of the great things about this board.

 

There is that old saying that the three things you never talk about at the dinner table are sex, politics and religion.... guess you blew it for point #1, best you keep quiet about the other two ;)

[Guest **cely***r***ne]

We're all different and diversity is one of the great things about this board.

 

This is what I wanted to say.....but for once...I couldnt put words to it!

Thanks OutForFun!!!

[MightyPen 67414]

I agree -- and like an earlier poster I was thinking about the "sex, politics, and religion" forbidden subject set recently when considering whether to post at all in one of the election threads.

 

I've made brief comments in the election thread, and even touched briefly on religion once, but in general those aren't subjects I really want to pursue here. So I doubt I'll post much more on those matters. I find both subjects *extremely* interesting, but I have other places I can talk about those. But for frank talk about sex and sexuality with people whose opinions interest me, CERB is a unique resource. I don't want to mess it up by making needless pronouncements on delicate subjects, and risking that people become less accessible to me on matters I DO want to discuss here.

[PistolPete 61421]

people should never think that you should less accessible, because there are matters you do not want discuss on here, or even if you form an opinion on a delicate subject, it is afterall a free world to express yourself no matter if it is sex,politics or religion, as long it is done in good taste and has merit to all those reading.

 

As a family we always discussed issues through dinner time, nobody ever got a slap in the head to express their opinion, what ever the discussion might of been.

 

I I don't want to mess it up by making needless pronouncements on delicate subjects, and risking that people become less accessible to me on matters I DO want to discuss here.