Etiquette Question - Tipping

[capitalman 3861]

Haha...I had to laugh Insidevoice about your itchiness! That's too funny!

 

Yes Cat, what you said about character and tightness showing through is so true. I immediately thought about the client I'm currently working for. She comes off as so nice but she's so tight and wants everything now and perfect and tries to manipulate me into doing more than we agreed on. It's pissing me off! Even though she has lots of work for me and lots of money, I don't want to work for her anymore. If I do work for her, her rates are going up...way up. That's how it works in MY business.

 

I didn't think you were my type, but now I find myself wanting you Cat.

[cat 262460]

Dear capitalman,

And so your prices should go up if she is trying to take advantage of you! It's so frustrating to take pride in doing something and someone just nitpicks. Drives me NUTS! I have spent the last couple of years working on just letting it go, but I have days where I really wonder. I am the first to admit that getting a great deal is something I love to do, but only if the deal is fair and willingly negotiated. It's never a good idea to negotiate with a crafts or tradesman. If I can't do it myself, I just count out the money and keep my tongue still unless the work is a concern. On rare occasions, someone comes for a visit and tries to revisit my fees. Unfortunately, you don't have the luxury of showing her to the door the way I do. I always have a tinge of satisfaction when the door closes and they are on the other side! I feel for you...

Catherine

[cat 262460]

I'd always send a thank you email if I enjoyed myself and would quite often furnish wine or such for us to enjoy together. Never a cash tip though as I wouldn't have the faintest clue how to present it. I would figure the lady would know what monetary value she would feel comfortable accepting from her clients. Despite what I've read in this thread I feel I'm a giving person but I am 1/4 Scottish afterall ... *wink*. Then again another thread prompted me to shave "down below" ... *itch, itch, itch*. So I never rule out changing my mind.

 

Delivering a tip is easy! Stop at the last flat surface in her apartment, take your wallet out and put the $ down while you look her in the eye and say..."Thank you". That usually elicits big kisses from me anyway. I have had guests tuck it under the pillow, leave it in the bathroom or tuck it in my cleavage with a kiss goodbye. When I was an agency girl, I often found it in my toybox, in the top of my purse and even in my boot! There is never an ungracious way to slip a girl a tip. Of all the people in this world, SP's are the last to be offended by the handling of $!

 

Catherine

[Guest f***2f***]

Delivering a tip is easy! Stop at the last flat surface in her apartment, take your wallet out and put the $ down while you look her in the eye and say..."Thank you". That usually elicits big kisses from me anyway. I have had guests tuck it under the pillow, leave it in the bathroom or tuck it in my cleavage with a kiss goodbye. When I was an agency girl, I often found it in my toybox, in the top of my purse and even in my boot! There is never an ungracious way to slip a girl a tip. Of all the people in this world, SP's are the last to be offended by the handling of $!

 

Catherine

 

thanks for that tip on tipping cat that is probably the most practical post on this subject...no one wants to embarrass themselves and appear gauche or tacky....your hints are noted.

[click 110]

.... I have had guests tuck it under the pillow, leave it in the bathroom or tuck it in my cleavage with a kiss goodbye. When I was an agency girl, I often found it in my toybox, in the top of my purse and even in my boot! ...

 

Catherine

 

Hi Catherine. In one of your first posts on this thread you mentioned that you can count on one hand the number of times that you have received tips since arriving in Canada .... but your last post is clear in stating that you have received tips on a frequent enough basis. That must mean that you have not been in Canada very long, or that you have 300 fingers on one of your hands. Either way, I'm looking forward to seeing you when you come back (we exchanged e-mails earlier).

 

Unrelated to my direct response to Catherine, I'd just like to chime in that I think that tipping should be expected in all personal service relationships wherein the service provider is not salaried and focuses on you as an individual (ie food/bar service, barber, hotel staff, taxi driver etc.). In fact, I'd say that some type of tip should pretty much be expected for even average service, with greater tips being reserved for exceptional service and lesser/no tips for exceptionally poor service. Just my three cents ...

[sexnonstop724 1727]

Tipping should be a direct reflection towards service level received. I question though is how much. Too little, seems like an insult. What is a fair amount. By % of quoted price? 10% 15%????

[ulixestrojan 3757]

Tipping should be done as often as you can and as much as you can afford. If the service is amazing the tip should reflect that. Work, regardless of what we do, generally sucks. When I have clients that are amazing it doesn't feel like work however I still want to be paid.

 

Remember, none of us gets out alive.

[mod 135640]

This is a good thread for all of Canada so I am going to move it but leave a redirect here.

[Incognito 331]

This is a good thread for all of Canada so I am going to move it but leave a redirect here.

Since I started this thread some weeks ago, this thing has taken on a life of it's own! Thanks to all of you - and especially to Catherine - for your great perspectives and comments.

[Emma Alexandra 123368]

Again i agree with Catherine....we all have our own reasons for doing what we do....a tip is well appreciated but not expected.

kisses,

Emma

ps...i love lillies...bars of gold,wads of cash, trips to anywhere....kidding....lmao

[Emma Alexandra 123368]

i once saw this ladies site that had pages of gift ideas for herself.....it consided of lots of land,sports cars,private jets,homes,the list went on and on...now thats class....hahaha...

[amadeus65 113]

Cat as usual you hit the nail on the head :D As I mentioned before I always leave a nice tip especially if the girls are good to me and give me the true gfe. For a single girl I tip a minimum of one brown and that is after the session if she is good. If she is so so it will be smaller maybe a green or two. For duos I tip a minimum of one pink a girl. I also like to bring gifts but normally if it is a girl I see regularly especially an indie I take her out lingerei shopping or for perfume, things that are expensive for them, and that stuff is expensive, that is how I show my appreciation, plus as cat say from a financial perspective thats a couple of browns the girl doesn't have to spend herself, plus I find most girls really enjoy a man taking them shopping. Just my 2 cents worth.

[amadeus65 113]

There certainly was no offense taken, this is a place to discuss these things and see another?s point of view. There is no right or wrong of it. It simply is. Every occupation has its own distinct challenges, and when it comes to finding the best of the best, it is always a scavenger hunt. In every profession there are those that simply show up, do their job and go home. Then there are the ones that put the effort in to become exceptional and those are the ones we all search for. A barber is an excellent example. If you want the extras, the tip is mandatory. It isn't the extra couple of dollars you leave that motivate him to do a masterful job; it's knowing you appreciate the effort and the results. My hairstylist could double his fees and I would pay it, because he is the best I have found for me and I wouldn't want to try and find someone else. It is a risk I am unwilling to take; my hair is part of how I make my living. If I were willing to risk having my tresses butchered a couple of times I could probably find someone else, but the grow out is long and painful. Been there, done that, not doing it again. So many out there wallow in a mundane existence and never notice the little things, and we all need the recognition that we are doing a good job. Thus the "tip"?

 

What I think has been missed out on in this thread is the symbology of the "tip". In some professions like waitressing, it is their bread and butter. For others in the service industry it is a thank you. But what does a "tip" say about the tipper? The way a person tips sends signals loud and clear about a person?s character. Someone who is "tight" shall we say sends out a message that they are constricted, adverse to letting go or taking a risk. In the game of seduction it is the ultimate anti-seducer. We are all cheaper than we think, and often float thru life without realizing the message we send is that we are closed off. Having a giving nature blankets someone?s entire being. Someone who shares willingly will do so in all areas of their lives. It means you are not afraid to give of yourself and that will carry you further in this world than just about anything else.

 

In the world of science, quantum physics has proven that thoughts physically manifest themselves and what we think can become real. Having a generous nature means the world will be generous back. I have experienced this first hand; it is a truth that has proven itself time and time again in my life. While money is a good way to gauge someone?s nature, selective gen♣♣♣♣ity is always a good rule to apply. People can give without hurting their wallets; all it takes is a little willingness to open up to others. I never worry about a tip when I have a guest who comes to me with his spirit open and giving. Those that arrive with walls that need to be dismantled one brick at a time seldom, if ever get invited back regardless of a tip. Everything we say, every action we take sends out messages and we need to be aware of what the message we are sending is. The money simply symbolizes recognition and appreciation, and helps alleviate some of the day to day stresses that preoccupy the mind. Just my thoughts on it...

 

Catherine

 

Again Cat, right on the money, that is the kind of person I am, hold the door open for the elderly, give up your bus seat for the handicapped just the way I was brought up I guess, the same with sp's I haven't met one yet that I couldn't talk to, for me the intimacy the warmth and the long passionate kissing and cuddling is far more important than the actual act itself, funny how I think like that but that is the way I am, and going out with a beautiful sp on your arm suits me just fine, its the one time I really get to feel special when I visit my sp, and most sp's at least the ones that post on here always offer a great gfe.:)

[capitalman 3861]

I couldn't tell you why I'm revisiting this thread after all this time, but here I am. I've read it all from top to bottom again, and I still stand by my earlier comments, but I have the following to add:

 

I know of some hobbyists that have been tipping SPs with such frequency that the SPs decided to raise their prices to what they've been receiving, basically saying "Well I always get this much, so that's what I'm going to charge now" I don't think that's right.

 

I'm reluctant to provide a tip right from the start because I feel it should only be left if the service warrants it, so the tip must be given at the end...or else it's really just part of the initial "donation". However, I can recall at least a few times when I was so dizzy and exhausted after a great session with a girl that I just completely forgot to tip her! I had overstayed my welcome and had to sort of rush out the door. After I left I thought "Shit, I should have tipped her!" but by then it was too late.

 

Should I give her a larger donation next time? But then I'm just upping my initial donation like I said.

 

It's all so confusing......:)

[whatsup 11893]

Tip at the end.

I once left a SP room and the door closed. I immediately remembered that I forgot to tip for the excellent encounter. I knocked on the door, she opened the door with a funny look and said I forgot to give you a tip. Even got an extra kiss and hug.

[spud271 47779]

I have given tips in the past, but not always. Most of the women I know would prefer I give a donation instead to a charity in their name. In general, the women I know don't look for a tip and have never indicated otherwise.

[A******g A****n 105]

An interesting topic, indeed! In my view, tipping is optional. In most cases, it depends on circumstances. When a client feels service exceeds his expectation, then something extra is appropriate. I never ask for tips. I tend to leave it up to my client. I think he should be the one to make that call.

Flowers? I'd rather get a nice sex toy..LOL. :)

[PistolPete 61421]

I really enjoy shopping for ladies! I can get wound up for a date, sexy clothes(normally their sizes are on their web site),download music on a CD and of course shopping at Aren't We Naughty sex shop...(it is great when you can get your SP to orgasm 1st when using a wonderful toy) much foreplay is always required for your lady, they always appreciate it! of course you tip them on the way out..or in your envelope..they always say thanks the next time or in an email.:wink:

[d*mm*y 887]

ROTFLMAO

 

I did this one year for Christmas, my family is not hurting and it is hard to figure what to get my siblings and cousins etc... So I got them donations! Man I could not believe the outrage and greed that started! Even my mother pulled me aside and said was not really appropriate. 2 things remind of this today this post and the news that the opposition wants to form a coalition government because they think that they may loose there election hand out! And they are trying to lay it down as an emergency measure to overcome the recession! I guess it is the combination of Charitable donation and political donation that made me bring these 2 things together, of course charities can do great things with the money. Donating to political parties is exactly the same as our hobby, you give them your money and you get.... well you know.

 

I have given tips in the past, but not always. Most of the women I know would prefer I give a donation instead to a charity in their name. In general, the women I know don't look for a tip and have never indicated otherwise.

[Guest AlleyAllure]

Well this is How I see it,

I charge enough that I don't think you need to tip, and my clients know I rather have a thoughtful gifts, something to try on , flowers/ plants, shoes, or body oils , as its something I can take away from the session and enjoy at another time.

 

Now not to say i am not tipped, when it happens,

if its from repeat client its, already in my card, or in my gift bag.

 

If it is with someone new, they do it at the end, and say ,

" Here get your self something nice on me"

and hand me the hotel envelope,

I have even had men, push it in my pocket, lol

 

I guess its how comfortable they feel..

now for how much? depends on the man, and time of Year,

 

I still stand by thoughtful gifts. my last gift was the best sent ever,

so much so that it has gotten men to out right feel they need to talk to me at that second.

 

Thanks Garry! Love ya BABE!

 

Alley

[Seymour 3970]

ROTFLMAO

 

I did this one year for Christmas, my family is not hurting and it is hard to figure what to get my siblings and cousins etc... So I got them donations! Man I could not believe the outrage and greed that started! Even my mother pulled me aside and said was not really appropriate. 2 things remind of this today this post and the news that the opposition wants to form a coalition government because they think that they may loose there election hand out! And they are trying to lay it down as an emergency measure to overcome the recession! I guess it is the combination of Charitable donation and political donation that made me bring these 2 things together, of course charities can do great things with the money. Donating to political parties is exactly the same as our hobby, you give them your money and you get.... well you know.

 

I have to say Sir Dummpy - that this story is one of the funnier ones I have read on here in a long while. :smile:

[pussy_liquor 102]

Cat's reply shows that she really is a classy lady and it would be my pleasure to meet her someday. It truly was an eye opener and I thank your for it!

[cat 262460]

I was surprised to this thread revived, but for all the newcomers who don't visit the old threads it's always good reading. I add to it because during my last visit to Ottawa I had a wonderful conversation with a guest. He was new to the hobby and had a million questions and I tried to answer all of them to the best of my ability. A 2 hour visit ended up being much longer because our chat made the time fly. He has a wonderful spirit and was really eager to understand the nuances.

 

We talked about considerations, the vast differences in fee structures and why it's necessary. He had looked long and hard at his options before booking our time together, but he isn't here on the board so many of his questions were issues that are covered in threads here. The three points that I tried to drive home were this...

 

1. My considerations are not "payment" for my time. The envelope is left because my guests enjoy visiting with me and if I had another job I would not have time to entertain. If my financial responsibilities are not taken care of then I can't entertain, the consideration is their contribution to ensuring we have the time to enjoy. I know this isn't the way all providers look at this, but it's accurate for me.

 

2. Tips, no matter how much they are, are always symbolic and allow providers to know they are appreciated. They are not expected and never impact the quality of our time together.

 

3. Respect is the key. Showing respect to a provider and treating her well will go further than any amount of money in the envelope. I can tell those that are accustomed to treating people well, and those that don't.

 

Do not think a tip is expected, most providers do not look for them. But even a $20 makes a girl smile. If she is in the lower end of the consideration scale the little add ons definitely add up and can make things easier at the end of the month. I've always said I would rather ask a 1000 people for a dollar than a $1000 from one person...

 

Catherine

[Dreamgirl 246]

...........................

[YoungStud 468]

Surprised to see this thead revived as well, but then there are always new members.

 

I tip my long-term favs and regulars with $$$. They are rather small in number, as I'm a rather promiscuous guy who is often looking for some new thrill. Screw the flowers and the chocolates for the most part. Cat is right. The women in the business do it for income. So when in doubt, gve them more of that ($$$), rather than some "guy gift based on what we think SPs might like".

 

Buying stuff is cool, but IMHO should have a personal aspect. I take my fav SP and good friend out shopping fairly regularly to buy her practical stuff (winter coat, boots, for example, etc) as well as some fun apparel. We always have an excellent time doing that, but then we really enjoy each others' company both in and out of bed.

 

 

I was surprised to this thread revived, but for all the newcomers who don't visit the old threads it's always good reading. I add to it because during my last visit to Ottawa I had a wonderful conversation with a guest. He was new to the hobby and had a million questions and I tried to answer all of them to the best of my ability. A 2 hour visit ended up being much longer because our chat made the time fly. He has a wonderful spirit and was really eager to understand the nuances.

 

We talked about considerations, the vast differences in fee structures and why it's necessary. He had looked long and hard at his options before booking our time together, but he isn't here on the board so many of his questions were issues that are covered in threads here. The three points that I tried to drive home were this...

 

1. My considerations are not "payment" for my time. The envelope is left because my guests enjoy visiting with me and if I had another job I would not have time to entertain. If my financial responsibilities are not taken care of then I can't entertain, the consideration is their contribution to ensuring we have the time to enjoy. I know this isn't the way all providers look at this, but it's accurate for me.

 

2. Tips, no matter how much they are, are always symbolic and allow providers to know they are appreciated. They are not expected and never impact the quality of our time together.

 

3. Respect is the key. Showing respect to a provider and treating her well will go further than any amount of money in the envelope. I can tell those that are accustomed to treating people well, and those that don't.

 

Do not think a tip is expected, most providers do not look for them. But even a $20 makes a girl smile. If she is in the lower end of the consideration scale the little add ons definitely add up and can make things easier at the end of the month. I've always said I would rather ask a 1000 people for a dollar than a $1000 from one person...

 

Catherine