Gabriella Laurence 301887 Report post Posted April 13, 2011 Additional Comments: My bad. I should have made it explicit that I was looking for feedback from Male members only, but I thought that implicitly it was clear... Now the thread that was about clients' privacy has been hijacked. I am asking the mod to close it. Mod, please close this thread. Did I just hear someone cry "wolf" because he is not getting the feedback and support he was expecting from gentlemen... only?? I sincerely hope MOD will not close this thread based on the "highjacking" pretense! I believe BOTH ladies AND gentlemen have benefited from this thread and it brought us ALL a deeper understanding about safety & risks, privacy and confidentiality for all parties involved. Cheers! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kingBong 93 Report post Posted April 13, 2011 Wow ... People are getting really cranky. To the guys: don't argue with the ladies over this ... They have every right to make this a requirement, and I understand why having heard many stories from the ladies that make me shiver or at least make me look at the floor in disbelief that a guy could be that mean. As I said, I would never complain about a lady insisting on this; I would simply, and respectfully, choose not to see her. To the ladies: don't argue with the guys that want to be discrete and not share that information. And I would never ask a lady for their personal information. And don't denigrate guys who have a legitimate concern about privacy. Comparing privacy (guys) versus safety (gals) is an apples to oranges comparison and neither can claim a higher moral ground BUT both need to be equally, and completely, respected. I agree totally with you on this, and this is exacty what I did: I told the SP 'thank you very much it's not for me' (even though the sp was gorgeous). Now, among the number of SPs and MAs who gave their opinions on this and were saying that they ask for real legal full names (which I totally respect BTW even if I don't agree with), only one does so in her ad. So, for the Benefit of everybody and not to waste your time and the client's time, PLEASE PLEASE and pretty PLEASE make it explicit that you are also screening for the full legal name in your ad. That way, some of us who are mindful about their privacy will not waste your time (and theirs). Thank you all for your contributions, even though sometimes it was like a twister in a glass of water :-) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PistolPete 61421 Report post Posted April 13, 2011 Some SPs are asking for the full legal name before even taking the apointment. And best of all, these same SPs would not give you their full legal name. I will never give an SP my full legal name. Would you? You never explicitly mentioned guys only answer please, so I think its only fair you hear two sides of the coin. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kingBong 93 Report post Posted April 13, 2011 You never explicitly mentioned guys only answer please, so I think its only fair you hear two sides of the coin. Yes you are absolutely right and that's why the subject about the privacy of the client has been hijacked. So I requested a close of the thread. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
EmilyRushton 253372 Report post Posted April 13, 2011 Yes you are absolutely right and that's why the subject about the privacy of the client has been hijacked. So I requested a close of the thread. Out of curiosity how has the thread been hijacked, it just sounds like you do not like the answers that you have been hearing? You asked about real names when booking, you have received multi answers none of which hijack the thread.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kingBong 93 Report post Posted April 13, 2011 I believe BOTH ladies AND gentlemen have benefited from this thread and it brought us ALL a deeper understanding about safety & risks, privacy and confidentiality for all parties involved. Cheers! I agree with you on this and I personally I love animated and clever discussions more than the usual BS that we read sometimes... But the thread about client privacy, which is important for us clients, has been hijacked. You cannot deny that. That's why I am opening a thread about SP safety and all can contribute there. Thanks again! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Megan'sTouch 23875 Report post Posted April 13, 2011 The safety of ladies is a direct implication of your privacy. We're not talking about poodles here. This thread is on topic. Posted via Mobile Device Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted April 13, 2011 The sanity of the ladies is questioned and used as a justification for a guy not to reveal his name...???? A guy going out with a lady who's sanity he questions to begin with would make me question his sanity...come on, think about it RG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andee 220524 Report post Posted April 13, 2011 If giving your full name is part of the lady's screening process and you don't want to give it, then don't see her. The incidences of Sps using personal information against clients is very low. There are unstable people everywhere, just not in the sex industry. I have heard of more games being played in the "Real world" than with SPs. I like Nicolette, require a callback number and don't care if your name is Tom, Dick or Harry, but if you are going to get something from me (my address), you have to give a little. (Even then, some guys don't even want to show a number, but that's another issue). I believe I take a far greater risk than the gentleman. For the ladies who require your full name, that is their screening process, and they are entitled to conduct their business the way that's comfortable for them. For the guys who aren't comfortable with giving their names, then I guess you won't be seeing those ladies. We could debate on end the pros and cons for each, but when it comes right down to it, a person has to what's comfortable for them and I never want anyone questioning the boundaries I have set for myself. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kingBong 93 Report post Posted April 13, 2011 (edited) The safety of ladies is a direct implication of your privacy. We're not talking about poodles here. This thread is on topic.Posted via Mobile Device No it's not always: you can discuss privacy from the perspective of the client and then safety from the persective of the SP seprately so that each will have enough 'air time' to be fair with both issues. Here we are discussing the safety from the perspective of the SP about 80% to 85% of the time, which means that the thread about client privacy has been hijacked! it's only mathematics (it doesn't bite!). See the thread about SP safety for the continuation on the subject of SP safety. Edited April 14, 2011 by kingBong Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hands95 60 Report post Posted April 13, 2011 A reputable lady who has reviews and has been around for awhile with no complaints is your best bet! Since cerb is a recommendation board' date=' and not a [b']review[/b] board, research here obviously won't accomplish the task. On cerb, just because some people say good things about someone does not mean that all is well. Likewise, lack of a recommendation does not mean all is bad. You can only come to a reasoned conclusion when you can examine both sides of the coin. Cerb is skewed entirely towards the ladies. And that is fine because I know that when I log in. Just don't suggest otherwise. The dangerous statement is a sweeping generalization - whether about the ladies or about the guys. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tiffany Amber 7031 Report post Posted April 13, 2011 Some of the replies in this thread just goes to show you the mentality that **some** men have toward the women in the profession. Your only digging yourself a hole by being rude and disrespectful! Once a reputable lady finds out who you are, and I mean your alias on CERB, she will read your post history and I'd say your chances with getting an appointment now are probably slim to none. If you dont wish to hear OUR opinions, make a board for just men! You dont seem to respect our opinions anyways. And yes we do talk alot about the safety of the SP's! Like Megan said before, WHEN IS THE LAST TIME YOU HEARD OF A CLIENT BEING KILLED BY AN SP??? Additional Comments: Since cerb is a recommendation board, and not a review board, research here obviously won't accomplish the task. On cerb, just because some people say good things about someone does not mean that all is well. Likewise, lack of a recommendation does not mean all is bad. You can only come to a reasoned conclusion when you can examine both sides of the coin. Cerb is skewed entirely towards the ladies. And that is fine because I know that when I log in. Just don't suggest otherwise. The dangerous statement is a sweeping generalization - whether about the ladies or about the guys. Whether its a recommendation or a review board, if the lady has been around for awhile, she will have a reputation, be it good or bad. Cerb is not skewed entirely towards the ladies! It's for EVERYONE, it's just a more positive enviroment! If you enjoy bashing towards the ladies and even towards the guys, PM me, Ill give you the website to another board. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kingBong 93 Report post Posted April 14, 2011 Cerb is not skewed entirely towards the ladies! It's for EVERYONE. it's just a more positive enviroment! . I don't think so. Look again! If you enjoy bashing towards the ladies and even towards the guys, PM me, Ill give you the website to another board. When you say bashing you mean reviewing? Don't give him the website, he already knows it. Additional Comments: The thread about sp safety is now open. Go there if you want to discuss SP safety. Additional Comments: You are wrong, I never went to see that SP. No f way. The sanity of the ladies is questioned and used as a justification for a guy not to reveal his name...???? A guy going out with a lady who's sanity he questions to begin with would make me question his sanity...come on, think about it RG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tiffany Amber 7031 Report post Posted April 14, 2011 KINGBONG, You just seem like a negative person. So why are you even on a board that's moto is "If you have nothing nice to say, then dont say anything at all"??? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kingBong 93 Report post Posted April 14, 2011 KINGBONG, You just seem like a negative person. So why are you even on a board that's moto is "If you have nothing nice to say, then dont say anything at all"??? I am a negative person because I speak my mind or because you don't agree with me? I am just laughing at this because you don't know me. Most people say the opposite but you are entitled to your own critique. I, on the other hand, cannot criticize you before knowing you, because you could be a real sweetheart, and I will tell you so, even if I disagree with you on some aspects of this issue. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
J Galt 337 Report post Posted April 14, 2011 I don't recall whether I was specifically asked for my name, but I ended up providing it anyway, because it shows up in my email, and it would have showed up on her call display when I returned a call from my home number, which I provided. Either way, I have no problem with providing my name to an SP who asks. Considering the position I'm asking to put her in, I'll do anything I can to ensure she feels safe and comfortable meeting with me. I have no intention of doing anything with her that would make her feel the need to use my name in a way to hurt me somehow. Besides, I have no wife to find out about my new hobby, I can't imagine my boss would care, and frankly, I'm not doing anything I'd be embarrassed about if it were found out. Some pretty classy ladies around here who I'll be proud to associate with as I immerse myself in this hobby. If the roles were reversed, and I were the SP, I'd probably be pretty paranoid. I'd probably have half a dozen pistols hidden in the room. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Capital Hunter 18263 Report post Posted April 14, 2011 Okay we have discussed the subject of SPs asking for gent's full name for 10 pages now with some heated responses. Something that I think very rarely happens. I am not sure how frequent it happens that an SP asks for the full name because as I said it has never happened to me and I have seen over 200 different ladies past three years and not once I was even asked for my first name not alone full!!!. May be because for outcalls they will have the full address so they feel safe enough not to ask for full name in my cases but I noticed that quite a few other long time gents also indicated that it has never happened to them either!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miss Scarlett 25073 Report post Posted April 14, 2011 I have no intention of doing anything with her that would make her feel the need to use my name in a way to hurt me somehow. Exactly "most" of the guys who end up on bad date lists, have done something really bad to deserve to be on the list! And the ones who don't, it will show in the long run with their regular posts on boards such as this one! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Parker 19761 Report post Posted April 14, 2011 If the roles were reversed, and I were the SP, I'd probably be pretty paranoid. I'd probably have half a dozen pistols hidden in the room. LOL! That's funny... but I've heard that from other girlfriends of mine. I think it definitely takes some courage and faith in your gut (and other people) to do this job. May be because for outcalls they will have the full address so they feel safe enough not to ask for full name in my cases but I noticed that quite a few other long time gents also indicated that it has never happened to them either!!! And they are outcalls to your home no? That could be the reason... They may just figure they have your address (or the address of a place you're borrowing) and so you're not going to try anything and risk the chance of having the police show up at your place. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Capital Hunter 18263 Report post Posted April 14, 2011 And they are outcalls to your home no?That could be the reason.. Yes I always invite guests to my home and me too like yourself thought so too that because they have my full address...., but reading a few posts in the thread I noticed that there are quite a few other gents who also stated that they have never been asked for their full name. So, my impression is that though it happens but likely very rare and only if the lady for some reason feels unsafe but I could be wrong. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Parker 19761 Report post Posted April 14, 2011 Yes I always invite guests to my home and me too like yourself, thought so too that because they have my full address...., but reading a few posts in the thread I noticed that there are quite a few other gents who also stated that they have never been asked for their full name. So, my impression is that though it happens but likely very rare and only if the lady for some reason feels unsafe but I could be wrong. I did when I first started... I was more concerned about my methods of screening and less confident in my gut instinct. (I also has less resources, such as Cerb and the wonderfully helpful ladies here.) I don't now, but that's because I feel my gut and other methods and more effective. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MiaBella 10988 Report post Posted April 14, 2011 . So, my impression is that though it happens but likely very rare and only if the lady for some reason feels unsafe but I could be wrong. I think that's exactly the point! If a lady feesl that that is the only way she will feel comfortable with you, and no other methods are an option any more, it was probably her gut telling her she NEEDS this info. Otherwise she could be at risk. I think gents should look at it the same way. If you feel the situation is sketchy and you aren't comfortable, then don't do it. your gut is telling you something. Safety first for everyone. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Phaedrus 209521 Report post Posted April 14, 2011 It's important to remember that predators do exist' date=' and you guys don't see the "bad date" list and the shit that happens.[/quote']I think this is a key point. Yes, we all hear about the serial killers, but an isolated (for now) killing or rape may only make the local news, and I'm sure we guys have no real clue about the day-to-day time-wasters, abuse, stalkers, nut-jobs, and all the other crap that's a daily reality for the ladies. Hearing about it second-hand is *not* the same as experiencing it for yourself - and most people will never even hear of it (Cerb has been quite eye-opening for me in that respect). And, as I think this thread has made abundantly clear, there are some folks who won't get it even then. So... what do we do about this? There's clearly some education that needs to be done here - and I'd include myself among the ranks of those that need it - but I'm not sure how we best go about getting the necessary understanding into the heads of those of us who would benefit from it. Obviously we hobbyists can't be given access to the "bad date" list or other SP-only resources, 'cos that would defeat the point of them. Perhaps a SP who felt comfortable doing so could keep - and then publish in suitably edited form - a record of all the crap that came her way for a day, or week, just to give the rest of us some idea of what really goes on out there, and how much of it there is. However, that would require someone who was prepared to do it, and I have no clue about how much effort that would take or the implications for the SP of actually doing it. Other thoughts? I do think that there's a real gap in understanding here, but it's not clear to me how we go about bridging it... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mod 135640 Report post Posted April 14, 2011 I don't think so. Look again! When you say bashing you mean reviewing? Don't give him the website, he already knows it. Additional Comments: The thread about sp safety is now open. Go there if you want to discuss SP safety. Additional Comments: You are wrong, I never went to see that SP. No f way. I asked kingBong why he sticks around on cerb if he does not like the way it is. He asked to close this thread because it was "Hijacked" but I don't see that. He just does not like the info he received. It seams our friend king bong here does not like the way cerb is run and with all the other discussion forum options I don't understand why anyone would contribute 50 posts when they don't like the site. Either shape up or move on to another site as the council here and the mods here will not allow comments like these to continue. You asked a question and you got some REALLY good feedback. Sorry you did not like it but the reality of it is... these ladies should ask for FULL legal name, they should VERIFY it and they should do everything they can to help protect themselves (and each other). 12 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paradise Spa 24019 Report post Posted April 14, 2011 I feel that this post has been very informative it is nice to see both sides of the fence (sp's/gents) and the strong opinions held by individuals. All in all gents you must be able to trust the sp's power of intentions for requiring a real name and ID in support of their real name. It seems by the comments that clients do not want to give true identity in fear of there hobby being uncovered which is totally a valid feeling. The sp on the other hand requires the gents true identity for a reason in order for them to feel safe because if a gent is willing to give their real name then the sp is automatically going to feel safer so to speak because they have nothing to hide. Going back to basic principles "he who cannot trust cannot be trusted". If a gent cannot trust the sp then why should the sp trust the gent with her life? The key here is there has to be an element of trust held by both parties. It is a win/win situation if there is that level of trust it will make for a much more relaxed encounter. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
