Would you give your full legal name to an SP?

[roamingguy 300292]

Thought I wouldn't comment but here goes again. In the one case I was required to go through verification including giving my name I also volunteered the lady my reservation confirmation number (even though she didn't ask for it). And I texted her my room number the day of the encounter so not only would she know which room I'm in, but she could call to confirm I was there.

When I see posts from guys telling how evasive he is, the more red flags go off for me,(and I'm just reading the posts) so I can only imagine what the ladies are thinking.

Hopefully, my last post on the subject

RG

 

Some additional thoughts. For the guys who say they don't know the lady's real name so they won't tell theirs, they are completely missing the boat. The guy has sought out the lady, not the other way around

Usually (or should be) it is done with some research (ie checking her website, CERB profile, reviews etc). The lady, on the other hand, after being contacted by the guy, needs to check (maybe just reference, or full verification) just to make sure that the guy she is meeting is who he says he is, and not a Russell Williams or Robert Picton for example. The majority of us are not the problems, unfortunately there are the minority of guys who can be sickos, or just time wasters. Less likely to happen if the lady knows who you are

[Megan'sTouch 23875]

You have a good memory :)

 

Remind me not to play Trivia with you :D

Not really LOL. I just communicate with everyone over email, and if I do not have a bad experience, I make a note of it. So if a lady asks me for a reference, I ask for his email address, search it, confirm that I saw him, and then see if he's on my "bad" list.

[fortunateone 156618]

Each city certainly has their different By-Laws, I do understand what could possibly take place in Vancouver, but that is there and I live here.I belong to a private club here, and there is no requirement for me to provide ID, for my yearly membership or for visits.

 

Because of your city licensing with by-law, they are forced to comply if that by-law was not there I'm certain they would not be asking for ID.

 

As for out calls, to a Hotel I don't do them, strictly in calls for me. I don't get asked for ID never have in all my years.

 

I can assure you it does not happen here (ID check) perhaps it does happen a lot in Vancouver, so maybe more common there but not here.

 

 

My point wasn't that it was common, done everywhere, or even been done for a long time. This is a new requirement. It can happen anytime anywhere, fwiw.

 

Your private club membership may not need your info for renewals, but like most places, no doubt they did need something from your when you jioned up?

 

This isn't the start of a conflict, fwiw, just that even tho many of us have been in this for a long time, it does not mean that the business will continue in the same way. Technology provides us all with new options. In the past, let's face it, you had few options. You could use your land line (which showed name and number if not on call display, then in the phone book, for most of us) An outcall arranged, the sp or agency had the ability to cross check the given with the info in the book, and do a call back to the phone # to get an answer before heading out. Or, you could drive in your car (complete with vehicle description, license # and a physical description of you (hard not to when you are driving your car lol), and the lady can decide to go or not go based on a quick conversation (same in reverse). 3rd option, go to a walk in massage parlour. The lady has backup at reception and in the other rooms by the fact she is not working alone.

 

All 3 options have a balance of revealing information or discretion.

 

Nowadays, the basic safety factors that came with the above options are gone. Unless or until the sps request information that can replace the information that they automatically received.

 

Additional Comments:

Good point (my prefer age range is 19 to 25 though). Yes this could be another reason. Though in my view I think that girls in this age range are equally in danger and most likely even more in danger and they should screen clients even more rigorousy..

 

 

That could be something you can help them with. It is my opinion that they are scared to ask for these things, or to require them, because they haven't developed their skills yet. This leaves them open to an abusive client. Giving them tips, beyond just directions to this site, based on the things you see brought up here, can help keep them safe. Keep in mind that a newer sp, less professional and less experienced, is exactly what predators seek. If you can assist them to make it more difficult for a predator to see them as a target, you will help more than you know. Some don't ask for info because they really believe in that technology, it is part of their lives, and they have trust in it. It is a false sense of security, imo.

 

The ladies you see are doing outcalls. At the very least, they should have someone know where they are going (address), time of arrival, making a safety call, and an ETA for finishing. They should be getting a full name, address, phone # should preferably be a landline. After the appt is set up, they should be calling the client before they head over, to confirm the appt and that the guy actually answers. Again, preferably a land line. In the case of hotel outcalls, the same method but calling for the room number given via the switchboard. This can be repeated by calling for the given name via the switchboard.

 

imo, anyone not willing to provide basic info is not worth seeing. In the case of newer and inexperienced sps, they are afraid of the clients and allow themselves to be pushed around. That is not cool. The number one most important thing any sp can do is set their rules, stick to them, and protect themselves. Inexperienced and experienced sps make a lot of bad choices, in order to not offend someone, and it is so unnecessary. For every pushy caller, there are 100s and 100s of decent guys out there waiting for an opportunity to spend time with us.

 

http://www.geishadiaries.com/home/2011/1/10/5-biggest-mistakes-escorts-make.html

[Capital Hunter 18263]

 

That could be something you can help them with. l

 

Believe me I do. I always advise them when doing outcalls they must have someone to watch them over outside and someone should know where they go or for how long.... Even though I have been burned once or twice before......... Believe me ladies in that age range (most) don't wish to hear advice (even sensible advice which clearly is out of care). Once I was accused of trying to run someone's life and all I was trying to do was trying to help out. Another time a young SP who had come all by herself on a first date, I told her that she should not do this ever again for her safety as she never knows who may be the next guy she may come across. But she got very hostile and aggressive.... I guess she didn't want to be told even for her own good.

 

So past year or so I have change my way a bit. I still do care but realized that at the end it is always her life, her decision and I am always a passing friend at the best. Minimum interference policy has become my policy even though on occasions I can't help and still give free safety advice (on not providing certain unsafe services or safety tips on outcalls or legality of incalls....) but again I tell you most don't like hearing it. I was like that myself when I was 19-20 lol, so I can't blame them for what I used to be myself lol.

[Megan'sTouch 23875]

SA - I think you have to think of where the advice is coming from. If a client gave me advice on my safety, I would be insulted. This advice comes better from another woman/worker.

[Capital Hunter 18263]

Yes Megan I agree (I learned it the hard way) but I was responding to fortunateone's suggestion that I think she was suggesting that I should help out those young SPs who may be too scared to ask for safety info from the clients. Also I consider myself as a friend to them who care for their safety .... even though you are correct again as no matter how I try to look at it, I am a client but one who cared more than it was called for and that was why I was burned likely.....

[Megan'sTouch 23875]

If you think a lady is doing things that are unsafe, I would suggest you direct her to CERB and SP only access. Or if that's not possible, at least another lady (I'd be happy to) that could help her out.

[Capital Hunter 18263]

I always direct ladies I see to cerb because I genuinely believe they will be a lot safer if they are on cerb and advertise here instead of former CL or present **. A number of already cerb SPs can testify to this statement. Unfortunately I have had a hard time convincng all because most don't follow this genuine good advice for reasons of their own (one was saying that she doesn't want a permanent record and prefers CL because after 45 days her ad disappears the other was asking the legality of all these and the other ..... some are in the business for a short while and they wish to forget the passing moment once done). Some promise that they will but they don't fall through.

 

On your other point, I used to advise them to join cerb and check the SP private area for safety but then recently I realized that that area is only open to long time or established SPs or those who are advertising on EC (I advise them on EC too). So a new SP joining cerb can't get immediate access to that area, based on my understanding. On the trustworthy contact on cerb such as yourself, I have done that too a couple of times, after they decided to join and needed tips.

[Chanel Reign 28097]

I always direct ladies I see to cerb because I genuinely believe they will be a lot safer if they are on cerb and advertise here instead of former CL or present **. A number of already cerb SPs can testify to this statement. Unfortunately I have had a hard time convincng all because most don't follow this genuine good advice for reasons of their own (one was saying that she doesn't want a permanent record and prefers CL because after 45 days her ad disappears the other was asking the legality of all these and the other ..... some are in the business for a short while and they wish to forget the passing moment once done). Some promise that they will but they don't fall through.

 

On your other point, I used to advise them to join cerb and check the SP private area for safety but then recently I realized that that area is only open to long time or established SPs or those who are advertising on EC (I advise them on EC too). So a new SP joining cerb can't get immediate access to that area, based on my understanding. On the trustworthy contact on cerb such as yourself, I have done that too a couple of times, after they decided to join and needed tips.

 

I too am an ambassador for CERB. If a client has found me via my web site rather than here, I screen much more carefully. When our playdate is over, and I liked them, I tend to take a few minutes to suggest that they go to the CERB community and visit, perhaps become a member. There are many benefits to CERB, and reasonable safety is one of them.

[Juice 2105]

For every pushy caller, there are 100s and 100s of decent guys out there waiting for an opportunity to spend time with us.

 

 

Thanks for saying so -- I agree totally that must be true. It's important to keep things in perspective.

 

BTW some SPs told me they get their best clients off CERB, so that would be an encouragement for new SPs to join I hope.

[dunn2010 121]

Believe me I do. I always advise them when doing outcalls they must have someone to watch them over outside and someone should know where they go or for how long....

 

I would hope most ladies have the common sense to practise some sort of personal security measures, it seems you have met some who do not. When I was in my 20's I didn't care much for others opinions either but they still shared them. Now I wish I had listened...

My first thought when I read this was I wouldn't say anything. She is an adult and makes her own decisions. But if I saw the same girl walking on a bridge railing what then? She might be fine or she might not...

I don't see a problem making a suggestion or comment but you would have to be careful on how you delivered the message. I think its coming from good intentions and genuine concern for a fellow human being...

 

On the topic of the original post, I like the anonymity of cerb and would be hesitant to provide my full real name for fear of it being stored somewhere and coming back to haunt me. But I wouldn't let it be a showstopper if it was a lady I really wanted to see...

[Miss Scarlett 25073]

The lady, on the other hand, after being contacted by the guy, needs to check (maybe just reference, or full verification) just to make sure that the guy she is meeting is who he says he is, and not a Russell Williams.

 

Exactly, and since this happened in MY backyard (10 min from my house), I need to be extra careful! I could have easily been one of his victims! I am thankful I screen!

 

And if someone is acting funny, or avoiding my questions, I will not see them! Simple! My life is not worth any amount of money!

[Nicolette Vaughn 294340]

Exactly, and since this happened in MY backyard (10 min from my house), I need to be extra careful! I could have easily been one of his victims! I am thankful I screen!

 

And if someone is acting funny, or avoiding my questions, I will not see them! Simple! My life is not worth any amount of money!

 

I do not ask for a full legal name and screen more along the lines of intuition. For starters, I do not make appts from payphones or blocked numbers. I don't care if people claim they have to be careful with their privacy. If that's the case, they shouldn't be calling escorts. It is very rude to assume they can be completely anonymous while I have to disclose an address and coming into my space. Tit for tat.

 

I listen to the questions these guys ask me, their tone of voice

and how they respond to the questions I ask them. If I hear something I don't like, I will make an excuse and say that I'm busy. I can tell within the first 30 seconds of talking to them if I'm going to meet them or not. I don't care if I've just lost money. I will not see someone if I get a bad feeling. There will always be other people calling and I have a long list of regulars.

 

Like Shortcake, I lived 5 minutes away from Russell Williams and many of those break ins occurred in my area. I also encountered someone running out from my backyard last week while they were attempting to elude the police. They ran out and scared the hell out of me as I was coming out the front door just before dawn. I yelled and screamed at him to get off my property and chased him with a lawn ornament. I was more shocked and startled but also mad in the heat of the moment. So after this incident, it really did spook me and made me realize that anything could happen in a split second. It has also given me more awareness as to who I decide to invite into my private space.

[Gentleman11 10508]

Short version is full disclosure by hobbyist is absolutely fair game! The last thing I want to share with a lady is her worry about the "safety"of my character while we share intimate times. If she or I is uncomfortable, the experince will likel;y be less than it could be.

 

I feel pretty strongly about this one by the way.

 

 

Musings from a guy that likes to hold open doors for ladies