Janebondage 2264 Report post Posted February 19, 2020 (edited) So as many of you know I am a past cerb/lyla hobbyist who recently started service providing. I also have been practicing bdsm and kink for twenty years and in a Pro Dominatrix in my other life. What many of you may not know is I am a switch. Meaning in my personal life I practice domination with some partners, I am also equally comfortable as a submissive with others. I like many things.....Variety is the spice of life after all. The reason I mention that is I thought it could be fun to blend providing with submission. Things like...Daddy punishes Babygirl with spankings and has his way with her. Or The degraded slut that is roughly manhandle is treated like a complete whore to be used. It is not something i have seen around the boards but I think it would be a lot of fun. I am wondering what kinda services folks would like to see in such a session? Feel free to DM me if you are too shy to answer here Thanks for the time and feedback 🙌 Edited February 19, 2020 by Janebondage Spelling 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Redcap 786 Report post Posted February 19, 2020 “Free use” is something that appeals to me, and that kind of fits into your idea. I think the challenge here is limits. You’d need to be very clear with what’s “in character” and what’s not, as you’re putting yourself in a vulnerable position. I personally would feel slightly weird treating an SP ‘like a whore’. Even though it’s a hot thought, it seems disrespectful (to me) and I wouldn’t want to encourage it. Obviously different in your case if that’s what you’re looking for, but would it attract the wrong kind of people? Screening would need to be tight. To some extent, gangbanging a girl would be hot too, but logistically I’m not sure how feasible it would be. 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Janebondage 2264 Report post Posted February 19, 2020 Thanks for the good points @Recap. I would highly suggest no smart man treat his Provider like a whore. As you mentioned there are safety concerns for both parties physically, but i would also an emotional and psychological. These styles of play are not for everyone and should not be ventured into lightly! I would strongly recommend only using experienced fetish providers for such things. It takes years of experience to learn what ones limitations are and how they will react in the moment and after. While I may be new to the more main stream providing new to bdsm and fetish providing I am not. I just happen to have started at the more extreme end and thats my comfort zone. 🤷♀️ Different folks and all. While it may not be for everyone the beauty of being a feminist here in today’s age is ...I get to choose how I am treated by whom. The beauty of being independent is i get to choose to work with a hobbyist or not. I am a consenting adult making an educated decision and getting paid to do what I love. While one lady may blush and adore being called a Princess, there are a few of us that have a lovely physical response to being degraded and called names. 😔 I am well versed in negotiating these scenes, vetting my cliental, implementing safety protocols and in my needs and aftercare for such play. I also know how to prepare my clients for their end and work within different levels of experience. I Also keep in mind, playing softer and using kinder words does not make any provider safer then rough play and mean words. I realize this post will offend some and I am certainly open to opinions and hearing concerns. That being said I have no shame in my kinks and see no reason why we should censor respectfully discussing them. Thanks for your excellent points 1 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sumac 1105 Report post Posted February 20, 2020 Have to say, I find this an intriguing idea. Exploring that which is different is definitely part of many hobbist's desire. Doing so with an experienced provider, with discussed boundries and safe words, as well as a foundation of mutual trust.....seems like a bases for interesting role play. Not that much different than that which takes place in a regular session. They require boundries, respect and trust as well. Jane should make a tour to PEI....you look and sound delightful. 1 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Janebondage 2264 Report post Posted February 20, 2020 6 minutes ago, Sumac said: Have to say, I find this an intriguing idea. Exploring that which is different is definitely part of many hobbist's desire. Doing so with an experienced provider, with discussed boundries and safe words, as well as a foundation of mutual trust.....seems like a bases for interesting role play. Not that much different than that which takes place in a regular session. They require boundries, respect and trust as well. Jane should make a tour to PEI....you look and sound delightful. Aweee thank you @Sumac. It may be easier to convince me of that in the summer ☺️ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sumac 1105 Report post Posted February 20, 2020 Completely understand...winter sucks in PEI. But, spring, summer and fall are wonderful and, it would be a pleasure to meet you. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mikeyboy 27133 Report post Posted February 20, 2020 Trust is key with this type of role play. I think that is why you don't see it offered much. Far more common to see dom services offered than sub as it is all about power dynamics. Difficult when we are mostly strangers. That said, I've know Jane (at least her virtual persona) for years now and she certainly knows her stuff! I'd be confident that she knows how to keep everyone involved safe. I think having someone experienced in this type of thing is key to exploring this kind of fantasy. I have to say I find the idea intriguing. 😉 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kitten 1281 Report post Posted February 20, 2020 God i miss the east coast! You are a ton of fun out there. I am a fellow switch who has always enjoyed the thought of dominating another woman into being a fun little toy and vice versa but have always questioned how to do so most safely, or exactly how to go about setting it up. 1 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Janebondage 2264 Report post Posted February 21, 2020 (edited) On 2/19/2020 at 9:27 PM, Mikeyboy said: Trust is key with this type of role play. I think that is why you don't see it offered much. Far more common to see dom services offered than sub as it is all about power dynamics. Difficult when we are mostly strangers. That said, I've know Jane (at least her virtual persona) for years now and she certainly knows her stuff! I'd be confident that she knows how to keep everyone involved safe. I think having someone experienced in this type of thing is key to exploring this kind of fantasy. I have to say I find the idea intriguing. 😉 Awee thank you for the kind words @Mikeyboy. You hit the head on the nail with having someone experienced. I can not stress this enough! Power exchange has a lot more rolling balls that the inexperienced will not know about. Physical Safety being only a more obvious one. One of the key things about power dynamics as a Domme is managing my clients safety not only in physical needs but in emotional and physiological as well. Many clients are well versed in what they want and have experience to how they respond and react. Just as many clients have no idea and you have to gently guide them and figure it out without pushing past their boundaries. Boundaries they both know and state, as well as boundaries they yet to realize. Many submissive’s will not speak up about what they do not like as it happens as they want to please the Domme. Its on the Domme to read it through reaction, micro-expressions and just experience. Where mistakes get missed is the before prep and the after prep. Pain play leaves marks one can see with the eye. However, bdsm/power exchange give a rush of endorphins and happy neurotransmitters like Dopamine and Serotonin. It can produce a flooding in the brain that acts like a drug induced state. If your client is getting into a car and going back to take care of kids, or going to work I have to manage how far I take them into this happy experience. I cant send them back to a construction operating heavy machinery googly eyed and stupid. It has to be managed. Likewise these happy states can leave a client floaty for a day or two as well. But it will even out and come with a bit of a drop and that can present in anxiety, feeling tired or just insecure. Making sure the client understands this makes it manageable. Following up for two days by simple texts or a call also helps lessen things a lot. This is where many miss the mark. In role reversal such as I am offering as the subbie slut....one considers my safety, as do I. But another concern is the phycological ramifications for the client. For those new to experiencing this type of play there are other risks. There is a flood of endorphins as above but it is heavy in the Adrenaline type hormones. So managing that from the bottom is a thing in my case. If the client is new to this play for instance I would suggest early evening and not late night. The Adrenaline release will keep them wide wake well through the night amd there will also be a crash. Even if the client thinks they can handle more, its my job to know and manage it in digestible pieces for them without making them think they are being managed. Rushing someone too far to fast is not healthy. Lastly these things while rare, do trigger people at times. Past abuse issues, feeling guilt for enjoying the consensual mean play when they are taught to respect woman. There can be an emotional spill off that needs to be dealt with. That means allowing extra time if needed and no back to backs. That means following briefly up for a few days. I can not stress enough that these types of play all look hot in porn we watch. But consider whom you do it with wisely. It will make all the difference in the experience and should really be with an experienced fetish provider. On my end I know what my limits, boundaries and needs are. I know how to communicate them before play and work that communication into an experience without side tracking it. I know what after care I need and how to take care of myself in the days to follow. This type of play is well within my risk profile and what i am offering is at a much lower level then I partake in in my personal play and professional play. So the risks are very manageable for me personally. Bear in mind I have twenty years of lifestyle experience in bdsm and kink so it did not happen overnight. I think it makes me ideally suited for introducing these kinds of play and power dynamics here. But gain, I recognize it is not for everyone. Edited February 21, 2020 by Janebondage 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Janebondage 2264 Report post Posted February 21, 2020 (edited) On 2/19/2020 at 10:37 PM, Kitten said: God i miss the east coast! You are a ton of fun out there. I am a fellow switch who has always enjoyed the thought of dominating another woman into being a fun little toy and vice versa but have always questioned how to do so most safely, or exactly how to go about setting it up. Isn’t being broad spectrum fun! So many possibility for naughty play! We are a fun bunch. If your ever in Halifax I would be happy to chat about my process and/or have you sit in on a few sessions if you like. Maybe beat a bum or two with me. I do suggest getting a mentor who is a fetish provider before venturing out on your own. There are a lot of unseen things to take into account on both the Dom/Top and Submissive/Bottom end. Likewise there is a great little community of delightful deviants I adore in Ottawa. I will also be out that way a few times this summer for bdsm training intensives. I travel a fair bit for my education and play in these areas. So keep in touch. I always enjoy meeting another like mind. 😈 Edited February 21, 2020 by Janebondage 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Janebondage 2264 Report post Posted February 25, 2020 I truly want to thank those of you who have messaged about my Play toy post. . You have been honest and blunt and laid your hearts out in text with stories of your lost D/s connections or the drive and need or for this style of play that is currently unfulfilled. I appreciate your trust with these heart filled moments and I can relate to the longing in my own narrative. For those of you that have messaged me your narrative despite not being ready or able to book....I am truly touched. Thank you for reaching out and sharing this part of yourself with me. Take your time, get to know me in messages and even phone calls. I get that this is a process for some and I am more than happy to communicate about your stories and answer your questions as they arise. I understand its a process for some people new to this style of play and am happy to be a sounding board and am able to offer what advice I can to aid your journey for when you are ready. Again, I am truly touched. Thank you ❤️ Jane 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites