An Interview With... June Starr - What Sex Positivity Means

[Guest lydiahardwood]

Hey lovers! Apologies that this week's interview is a little late. I'm excited to share this one with the wonderful @JuneStarr on what it means to be sex positive. You'd think that everyone is positive about sex, right? Well, perhaps not. Have a read and please comment with your thoughts! ❤️ 

 

Q: Hey June! It’s great to have the chance to talk to you. Tell me a bit about yourself!

A: The pleasure is mine! My name is June Starr and I am an escort. For the sake of this interview I will try my best to keep my answers brief, but this is a topic I could discuss for days on end.

Q: Would you call yourself a sexual person? And if so, have you always been?

A: Yes I would call myself a sexual person, and I would say I have been from the get go. I didn't always know what to do about it, or how to embrace it, so for most of my young life I hid it. But I have always been this way. 

Q: What does sex positivity mean to you?

A: To me sex positivity means embracing and accepting your sexuality and desires as well as those of others. As long as no harm is being done, there is nothing wrong with taking a trip to bone town, or talking about it, or making jokes about it. You're straight and your gay friend got laid. Get it girl! Who cares that you're not into the same thing? The world is a tough place and your friend is swimming in endorphins and happiness. Celebrate! 

Q: Why is sex positivity needed?

A: Because sex and the sexual world are not inherently bad or evil! I think there is a lot of freedom in approaching to the topic of sex from a neutral or positive place. Approaching it from a negative mindset really limits us. I also think sex positivity leads to more radical self acceptance, and acceptance of others who are different from us. 

Q: What stigmas around sex do you think need to disappear?

A: All of them of course! One in particular I can think of that needs to go out with the trash is the stigma around not climaxing. In my opinion climaxing is not the point of having sex. Having sex is the point of having sex. Don't worry about climax, worry about making your partner and yourself feel good.

 

Q: How do you think we can make that happen?

A: I think creating situations where we can discuss our desires without judgement, but rather with curiosity, is a good place to start. "You're into what? Ok, what about that turns you on? Ohhhhh, that makes sense. Want to give it a try?" and boom suddenly you're having the kind of sex you want to be having! 

Q: What was it like when you were growing up? Do you feel like sex education was comprehensive enough?

A: HA! I’m from a very conservative place where our sex ed was abstinence only scare tactics. “If you have sex, you WILL get pregnant and be shunned”. My sex ed came from Literotica. 

I grew up knowing that sluts are fun but don’t get brought home to meet mom. Good girls get married, and sluts aren’t good girls, so if you put out you'll never get married. Be attractive but don't be a tease, “good” but not boring... did I mention my town had one bar and seven churches? One young lady in town had a reputation for "having a mattress strapped to her back" and it was hard for her to find a job as a result. Nobody wanted to hire the town bicycle. This of course was not the case for the randy young men in town, they found jobs easily. It is not a sex positive place, full of double standards.

Q: I personally feel like things are improving. Female masturbation is talked about more now. I remember telling my school friends I did it and they were disgusted, but now we’re all comparing sex toys. What advice would you give to someone who feels ashamed about their sexuality?

A: That sexuality is a normal and natural part of our entire person. Even the Catholic Church agrees (where are all those babies supposed to come from? Spores in the ground?). Self acceptance is key. How can you fight the stigmas from society when you're fighting yourself? It might be the case that your sexuality is different from others', and that is really hard. Your path to self acceptance may be a particularly hard one. But you can spend your whole life hiding yourself from the world, or you can spend your life enjoying yourself. Hiding is exhausting, and if you ever get tired of it there's always the alternative. 

 

Q: Are there any things you struggle with still and are working to overcome?

A: Oh yes! I still struggle quite a lot with stigma surrounding period sex. While I *know* this isn't the case, I have a hard time *believing* that non-period havers are not universally disgusted or afraid of my period. I'm still working on not automatically apologizing after period sex. 

Q: Love your inclusive language there! The sex industry… in general, do you think it’s had a positive or negative effect on people’s relationships with sex? Can we have some examples?

A: I don't have nearly enough experience in the industry to be able to speak in generalities! From what I've seen though it appears to have had a positive or effect on most everyone I've encountered. 

Some examples:

One of my clients was working through some trauma, and doing a great job, but was getting stuck when it came to "bedroom things". Coming to a professional took away the fear of rejection and the pressure to be romantic, and he was able to relax and enjoy himself. The feedback seemed to indicate he found the experience to be very positive, and helped his healing journey greatly. 

Another client came to me because they wanted to be more knowledgeable and confident in their own skills. They wanted to try different things that were maybe going to be awkward at first, so they came to a professional who could help guide them. Once this person had a handle on the basic mechanics, they seemed to really be enjoying themselves! It was wonderful to see them grow this way! 

A third client would visit for two hours once a month, during which time he didn't have to give his all to his family. We got to focus on his desires and his wants and having sex the way he liked to have it. This client could then go home fulfilled and be the most attentive, loving, doting father and husband he could be. 

To me these all seem to point to how sex and the sex industry can be used in so many ways to have a positive effect on our lives.

Q: Thanks for your time, June. Is there anything else you’d like to add?

A: Black lives matter. Indigenous women matter. Racism is bad for the economy.

 

[NotchJohnson 214129]

Thank you @JuneStarr for the wonderful answers and to @lydiahardwood for inviting her to this interview.  We all want a freak in the sheets and a lady on the streets.  I don't mind having a little freak on the streets myself.

 

[Sharpe 771]

Love this interview!  Thanks @JuneStarr and @lydiahardwood!

[Kitten 1281]

6 hours ago, lydiahardwood said:

so for most of my young life I hid it.

 

❤️ My people ❤️

 

I grew up in small-town Ontario which was also quite conservative. I can't relate with you saying this is enough as I feel shame had also caused me to do the same.

 

I am stupidly curious, what strain is in that pen??

[Ninja83 62]

I loved this interview. I had the pleasure of meeting @JuneStarr last month and she is so fantastic in so many ways. The world needs more people like her!

[Allie Zeon 2925]

Yes for last quote on the interview: "To me these all seem to point to how sex and the sex industry can be used in so many ways to have a positive effect on our lives"

[JuneStarr 95]

On 3/1/2021 at 1:03 PM, Kitten said:

 

❤️ My people ❤️

 

I grew up in small-town Ontario which was also quite conservative. I can't relate with you saying this is enough as I feel shame had also caused me to do the same.

 

I am stupidly curious, what strain is in that pen??

It's a sativa strain from General Admission. I think it was Lemon Haze 🙂

[JuneStarr 95]

19 hours ago, Ninja83 said:

I loved this interview. I had the pleasure of meeting @JuneStarr last month and she is so fantastic in so many ways. The world needs more people like her!

Awww thank you so much ❤️

[Kitten 1281]

2 hours ago, JuneStarr said:

It's a sativa strain from General Admission. I think it was Lemon Haze 🙂

I am a nerd for Super Lemon Haze although sativas I can't do too much. I love my end because I intend to leave my smoking at night due to that fact.

Some of my favourite strains! Sensi star, MK Ultra. I enjoy 2:1 splits as well particularly Durga Mata or HarleyQuinn 👌

[Mikeyboy 27133]

Enjoyable interview.  I admire your perspectives on this subject and wish they were more common.  Thank you

[Phaedrus 209521]

Great interview, @JuneStarr! Thanks for doing it! I have to say, I wonder how many folks are dealing with the judgementalism that they experienced in their formative years, and how many never recover from it and go on to harm their own kids with it.

One thing I do have to take issue with, though...

On 3/1/2021 at 11:56 AM, lydiahardwood said:

For the sake of this interview I will try my best to keep my answers brief, but this is a topic I could discuss for days on end.

Nooo! Enough of the brevity! Give us more! :)

[JuneStarr 95]

10 hours ago, Phaedrus said:

Great interview, @JuneStarr! Thanks for doing it! I have to say, I wonder how many folks are dealing with the judgementalism that they experienced in their formative years, and how many never recover from it and go on to harm their own kids with it.

One thing I do have to take issue with, though...

Nooo! Enough of the brevity! Give us more! 🙂

Thank you so much! 
 

Hahaha I guess you’ll have to come up with more interview questions then! 

[Victoria69 46]

On 3/1/2021 at 11:05 AM, NotchJohnson said:

Thank you @JuneStarr for the wonderful answers and to @lydiahardwood for inviting her to this interview.  We all want a freak in the sheets and a lady on the streets.  I don't mind having a little freak on the streets myself.

 

Thank you girl..fantastic interview 

[waterat 20911]

11 hours ago, Phaedrus said:

One thing I do have to take issue with, though...

Nooo! Enough of the brevity! Give us more! :)

 

1 hour ago, JuneStarr said:

Thank you so much! 

Hahaha I guess you’ll have to come up with more interview questions then! 

This interview with @JuneStarr immediately led me to go visit her last night! We celebrated sex positivity and our interview  of each other carried on through the celebrations :)

Thanks so much for both interviews @JuneStarr and also thanks to @lydiahardwood - you'll need to add 'matchmaker' to your linked in skill sets.

 

[thepartypigeon 1096]

Wonderful interview!!