Beating the Blues

[vegeta85 1675]

I've been going through a rough patch emotionally for the past 6 months. In January I got into a car accident. I wasn't hurt but it messed with my anxiety badly. That new anxiety has compounded my some of my existing mental issues and created new ones. 😕

My questions to everyone is: How do you keep from getting depressed? When you're down, how to you bring yourself out of it? What gives your life meaning? 

Thanks.

[Guest]

Porn and beer...

[OldandNerdy 1303]

I went through something similar recently, so I know how you're feeling. 

 

For me, the only way I dug out of it was to take it an hour at a time.  Try to find something that calms you or brings you even the smallest amount of joy.  And focus on that until you get through the hour.

 

Then repeat that.  When you start handling the hours, then focus on the days.  Take your time, theres no rush, go at the pace that works best for you. Find small things, simple things. 

 

Work on getting yourself outside and around people.  Being around people can be very healing. Even if you aren't interacting with them, just being around other people, seeing what they are doing, seeing that you're not so different from them, it all helps a little bit.

 

Go get yourself a treat.  Ice cream, coffee, a donut. A burger, whatever it is that counts as a treat to you.

 

It takes time.  It takes effort.  It's nothing to be ashamed of, pretty much everyone deals with it to some degree at some point in their life.

 

You're not alone, you have a community here and elsewhere that will listen to you and bring you up.

[NotchJohnson 214123]

Do you have a hobby?  If you don't think about doing something that will make YOU happy.  Plant a garden, go hiking, ride a bicycle etc...

[Phaedrus 209521]

@vegeta85, I don't have any useful advice, I'm afraid. I just wanted to thank you for kicking off this thread; mental health issues are something that affect many of us, and that many of us really don't want to talk about, and threads like this are really important to remove the stigma that has historically been associated with them.

[shyguy98 6]

Try to find someone or multiple people to talk to about what you're going through. Not just anyone but someone that listens to you and acknowledges how you are feeling. It's not about finding the answer but just getting it out there. If you have an Employee Assistance Program, take advantage of it. Talk to a doctor, they may be able to refer you to a counselor that would be covered by OHIP.  

Try journaling. Sometimes it helps just to write things down. Just how you are feeling. Answer your own question that you posed: What (or who) gives your life meaning? Maybe write the good and bad that happened that day. Sometimes the bad outweighs the good but you will see that you do have good experiences too. Write down what has changed since the accident and see if there is something you can strive to get back. It may allow you to see what is causing your depression to eliminate or manage it. 
Try exercise. Go for walks or runs. Fresh air and the sun helps. Do things you enjoy, even if it's by yourself. If you like dogs, go hang out with a friend's dog. Companion pets help. 

Set some small goals. Even if it's just to make your bed every morning. You'd be surprised that by knowing that you accomplished something first thing in the morning that it will lead to a better day.

Most importantly, it's okay to feel the way you feel. There is nothing wrong with you.

Also, if your depression is alcohol or drug related, try going to AA or NA. There could be many people in similar situations that can directly relate to you.
I've had my own struggles for year upon years. The stigma of mental health is going away. We are all in it together. You did the right thing just asking for help. 🙂

[Steampunk 143]

I did have a motorcycle accident 5 yrs ago (0% resposability). Some brain damage, could be worse but enough to prevent me from doing my job as an executive. Symptoms will likely no longer improve for the rest of my life... All that to say that i did, and still, suffer not from full fledged depression but depressive symptoms. The psychologists, psychotherapists,  and trauma doctor all told me at some point that every case is different.

 

And that's my whole point: every case is different and although getting ideas from everybody is good, go get professional help if this is at all possible. The therapist might no tell you what to do but get you to generate ideas that work for you.

[vegeta85 1675]

I appreciate everyone posting on this. I'm in a better place than I was last summer. Having said that, I think should be an ongoing thread.

[5thHorseman 84]

I've struggled with mental health issues, including anxiety and depression, for all of my adult life. I've read through some of the stuff from others, and some great advice.

I've made some great advances in the last year.

But, I have some very uncomfortable truths for you.

You play a part in your own mental health. The biggest part. Yes, you can go to therapy, which is great. Don't be afraid of medication...some people think they are weaker for using it, but if a doctor thinks it would be beneficial, it would be beneficial.

Here's where the uncomfortable truths come in. Own your own mistakes. If something goes wrong, and you played a part in it, take responsibility...don't make excuses, don't pass blame on someone else. 

Stay away from negativity. Stay away from negative  people. As easy as it may be to do, don't entertain rumours and gossip, and don't contribute to them. If it's intended to tear someone down, cut that shit out now. If you're wasting time and energy tearing someone else down, that's time and energy that could be better served in building yourself up.

The better you become, and work towards being a better person, the better you will feel.

[SarahAlexxx 2025]

12 minutes ago, 5thHorseman said:

I've struggled with mental health issues, including anxiety and depression, for all of my adult life. I've read through some of the stuff from others, and some great advice.

I've made some great advances in the last year.

But, I have some very uncomfortable truths for you.

You play a part in your own mental health. The biggest part. Yes, you can go to therapy, which is great. Don't be afraid of medication...some people think they are weaker for using it, but if a doctor thinks it would be beneficial, it would be beneficial.

Here's where the uncomfortable truths come in. Own your own mistakes. If something goes wrong, and you played a part in it, take responsibility...don't make excuses, don't pass blame on someone else. 

Stay away from negativity. Stay away from negative  people. As easy as it may be to do, don't entertain rumours and gossip, and don't contribute to them. If it's intended to tear someone down, cut that shit out now. If you're wasting time and energy tearing someone else down, that's time and energy that could be better served in building yourself up.

The better you become, and work towards being a better person, the better you will feel.

"Stay away from negativity. Stay away from negative  people. As easy as it may be to do, don't entertain rumours and gossip, and don't contribute to them. If it's intended to tear someone down, cut that shit out now. If you're wasting time and energy tearing someone else down, that's time and energy that could be better served in building yourself up.

 

The better you become, and work towards being a better person, the better you will feel."

 

Staying off of SP411 will do you a lot of good too. Surround yourself with people who uplift others who struggle, not spread gossip. Tearing someone else down to make you feel better is always the wrong move. 

 

 

 

[wynn 589]

I find having a hobby certainly helps. Also, the odd trip around the province clears the brain.