That Smell

[foofer 217]

 

 

OK. Time to take a break from the usual topic of who tickles your Elmo the best or which Betty is really Betty.

 

Why in whatever deity you pray to's name do MP's use such horrible smelling oil?  Let's use Ness as an example, even though they all seem to be the same. You're lying there all relaxed, well, as relaxed as you can be with someone sitting on your legs till your feet turn blue, then out comes the oil. Not just a little splash, but enough to get the Ever Given unstuck from the Suez Canal. A whiff of baby oil lightly dances across the room. Life is good. A while later you're done and allegedly happy. You get up to put your clothes on, then it hits you - you smell like an 18 year old hot oil wrestler at closing time.

 

By the time you get to your car, it's like the smell is getting worse. Sweet tapdancing Buddha, it's following you. You got the windows open and the A/C on, and the shit seems to be fermenting.  Can't even check your rear view for a cop or insurance fraud detective because your eyes are watering so bad. You need to go to the store but you know everyone is going to be thinking, "he's been to a house of ill repute". Judgy bitches.  Instead, you rush home and make a beeline for the shower, avoiding other judgy bitches. You scrub and scrub, but the water is beading better than a new teflon frying pan. You consider acetone, but it would probably melt the shower curtain. Besides, the smell of your Axe body wash is starting to overpower the rancid baby oil. Now it's time to go wipe the oil slick from the car seat.

 

Thing is, there's some damn good massage lotions out there that don't smell like vagrant's butt crack. Diamond Athletics sells some good stuff, but it's more than $2 a gallon.  Has anyone found an MP that uses unscented oil? Or at least something that doesn't make you want to sew bounce sheets into a face mask?

 

 

[Blue0012 1699]

353 always used the best oil, but then I haven't been there in two and a half years so who knows what they use now. I do find the worst ones are the ones that use straight up baby oil. Gah. 

I recently had a young lady have me reciprocate by giving her a massage after my session. But she didn't want me to use oil, she had me use some body/skin lotion and bloody hell ... that stuff ... took no joke three days to dissipate. It was god aweful. No joke. Three days I was still smelling it. 

Tips on getting rid of the oil. Don't use bodywash/soap with moisturizer in it. It won't break up the oil. A lot of liquid body wash is 'moisturizing'. Use bar soap. 

[spontanious 1425]

I just tell them light oil and if need be I show them what u mean...worst oil experience for me was at Ness also

[usernametaken 2889]

You can always bring your own oil.

[Ajay 106]

11 hours ago, Blue0012 said:

353 always used the best oil, but then I haven't been there in two and a half years so who knows what they use now. I do find the worst ones are the ones that use straight up baby oil. Gah. 

I recently had a young lady have me reciprocate by giving her a massage after my session. But she didn't want me to use oil, she had me use some body/skin lotion and bloody hell ... that stuff ... took no joke three days to dissipate. It was god aweful. No joke. Three days I was still smelling it. 

Tips on getting rid of the oil. Don't use bodywash/soap with moisturizer in it. It won't break up the oil. A lot of liquid body wash is 'moisturizing'. Use bar soap. 

I as well have had the pleasure of reciprocating a massage to a number of providers. Would you mind sending me a DM on who you have had this privilege… I will do the same.

[builder3007 138]

2 hours ago, Ajay said:

I as well have had the pleasure of reciprocating a massage to a number of providers. Would you mind sending me a DM on who you have had this privilege… I will do the same.

DAM.  I have had opportunity for touch but not reciprocating a massage.  A little envious 

[Burnam 322]

Hate the smell of baby oil and will not return wherever it's used.  And too much oil of any kind ruins a massage.  Need some friction.

[interesting! 22]

what 'spas' are letting you return the massage favor?

[usernametaken 2889]

23 minutes ago, interesting! said:

what 'spas' are letting you return the massage favor?

You may want to start a new thread for this topic. 

[Blue0012 1699]

Okay ... couple things. Any I've provided massage for have been women I've seen many times and we have a connection of sorts. A lot of trust is involved on their part. Regardless, I'm not at liberty to say. I wouldn't put that out there. 

That being said I will say this. Resist the urge to offer. It never ends up as it does in your fantasy. One of three things is gonna happen.

More often than not you'll get the dead fish. She's only letting you do it cause you're paying for her time and its easier than massaging you, but she's not into it, has no interest in it, she's likely fully clothed. No fun. The dead fish. 

Second possibility, you get the 'dictator'. She's impossible to please, she constantly corrects your technique, and she sees it as therapeutic, not what you imagined in your head. The dictator. 

Third possibility, and very rare, both times I ran into this are with women that have since retired or moved on. This is the one that actually enjoys it but from that point on sessions become about her and less about you. One would hop up on the table for 'her turn' on arrival. The other would rush through 'my time' to get to 'her time'. The time thieves. 

So resist the urge. Its always better in your head. 

[DwayneR 2105]

Sometimes Shu would complain about her sore back during our session. So after I would ask her if she wanted me to work on her back. She would say yes and get on the table.

[JLeeLewis 1344]

Had the opportunity with Rona back in the day. She didn’t fall into any of Blue’s 3 categories. 😉

[Blue0012 1699]

Damn that Rona. She was before my time. But seems to be all the veterans favorite. 

[executivemale 1007]

I love the oil, especially on the finish, bring it on, make me slippery! 

[Horndog66 14104]

14 hours ago, executivemale said:

I love the oil, especially on the finish, bring it on, make me slippery! 

In that case, you should see Alina at Phuong Hoa Salon on Pembina Highway. She slathers enormous quantities of oil on you, and no amount of hot towels will remove it all. I almost fell getting off the table because of the oil on the soles of my feet.

[spontanious 1425]

1 hour ago, Horndog66 said:

In that case, you should see Alina at Phuong Hoa Salon on Pembina Highway. She slathers enormous quantities of oil on you, and no amount of hot towels will remove it all. I almost fell getting off the table because of the oil on the soles of my feet.

You saying she does a finish Horndog66

[Horndog66 14104]

I can neither confirm nor deny...😄

[pegcitymonique 1000]

Couldn't help but notice all the replies from those that do not enjoy having issues MP that leave strong, overpowering, scents.    Maybe some can benefit and use this advice, when this a  problem arises or when choosing a better option

It's cheap, no smell, doesn't stain, and leaves your skin so smooth, & dries so no greasy feel is left on your body & I use it in my hair too! 

 

Can u guess what this perfect product may be?

VEGETABLE AND/OR CANOLA OIL 

 

[kris1972 558]

Canola oil is super cheap. Phoenix on Main and whatever other places they own use Canola Oil. It has a yellow colouring. Though it didn’t sound good to hear , my skin not smell ever suffered. But I will always remember a massage lady there telling me that it’s canola oil. 

[Blue0012 1699]

The same stuff as cooking oil? Or is it also sold in a different formulation for massage. 

[impala 2]

15 hours ago, pegcitymonique said:

Couldn't help but notice all the replies from those that do not enjoy having issues MP that leave strong, overpowering, scents.    Maybe some can benefit and use this advice, when this a  problem arises or when choosing a better option

It's cheap, no smell, doesn't stain, and leaves your skin so smooth, & dries so no greasy feel is left on your body & I use it in my hair too! 

 

Can u guess what this perfect product may be?

VEGETABLE AND/OR CANOLA OIL 

 

President's Choice Extra Virgin Coconut oil ... sold in plastic jar (about 800 - 900 ml in size) is way better ... for massage and other things (including actual cooking lol). Smells and feels way more pleasant too... than veg. / canola oil! 🙂

[impala 2]

1 hour ago, Blue0012 said:

The same stuff as cooking oil? Or is it also sold in a different formulation for massage. 

More likely same stuff you cook with ... 🙂

But refer to my previous post ... Whatever i mentioned in it is much better.

[impala 2]

On 8/17/2021 at 6:48 PM, DwayneR said:

Sometimes Shu would complain about her sore back during our session. So after I would ask her if she wanted me to work on her back. She would say yes and get on the table.

Shu who? 🙂

[MonorZ 201]

9 hours ago, impala said:

Shu who? 🙂

Long retired MP and mamasan of fond memory. Sigh. 

[joejoebaby69 0]

Oil eh 🤣