The donation delima

[Nicolette Vaughn 294340]

It's been a while when the paper was the only option. The interesting part is the trust that has evolved on this board. I wasn't sure if I had done the right thing when I first became a member here, new I know I made the right choice :)

;)

 

If you are ever in doubt upon arrival of seeing an SP and not sure that you want to part with your money, the best thing to do is give her a cancellation fee and bow out gracefully. In the end, even though the SP may be upset, it would be worse for her to go through an appt only for you to be unhappy.

[Ace Drivers 134]

As a relative newbie to this hobby myself 2009...and yes I'm a newbie compared to some on this board...when I started, the first few encounters were late night, drunken, completely spur of the moment...stupidity...the encounters never lived up to what my drunken mind had built them up to, and ultimately started to question what the hell I was doing especially after a couple of...unprofessional experiences. My point in saying this is that one really has two choices with this hobby they can continue with similar habits described above or they can absorb the plethora of advice and information on this board and spend their money more wisely, ultimately leading to similar experiences had by others described on this board. And if you do that, your issues and "concerns" will be virtually eliminated.

 

My second point is a little more direct, and I'll pose it in the form of a question. Would you go to a hockey game, the theatre, etc. without paying for your ticket first? Although I would certainly like to ask the Sens for my money back on occasion given a poor performance...or pay for my ticket once I am satisfied with the effort my team put forth that night, but not an option ; )

[Heartburn 155]

I agree with you Ace Drivers and that's why I posted the question here. The replies I got are priceless and I'm very grateful for all the positive feedback. My last attempt at hobbying many years ago did not turn out right and this time I want the experience to be pleasurable for all concerned. Also I though this allot more appropriate discussed here rather than at an appointment.

 

I guess if you don't have some disappointments you can't appreciate the better moment in life as much :D

[Reese 253]

I've actually been quite surprised on most occasions in my hobbying experiences over the past 5 years. I usually play it safe by visiting well-reviewed ladies and don't typically TOFTT, so there's almost never a little voice in my head warning of a fool and his money soon parting ways. My nervous anticipation is enough to deal with! Wondering if she'll actually see my legs shaking when she opens the door. The surprise is that so many ladies seem so trusting in us, especially first time encounters. My personal preference is to ask for a quick rinse-off on arrival, despite the thorough scrubbing and cleansing ritual I'll perform prior to an encounter. I like to provide the lady with this discreet opportunity to view the donation and put her mind at ease. On most occasions, I've exited the shower to notice the enveloppe hasn't budged an inch, or that she's ignored it and focused solely on the gift bag of Godiva, BodyShop or other offerings. Proof again that they'd often ask what duration of visit I'd prefer without having viewed the telling $contents$ in the enveloppe. We have to really appreciate that level of discretion, trust and professionalism. But again, having not necessarily taken one for the team in a long time, I can appreciate Heartburn's last comment/quote : " I guess if you don't have some disappointments, you can't appreciate the better moments in life as much ". Best of luck in your next venture, Heartburn ! With so many fantastic ladies here on CERB, it's doubtful any of them would leave you feeling regretful.

[Guest s******ecan****]

I've never been concerned about paying up front, though I will admit to forgetting to now and again lol! Never have forgotten long enough for the lady to say anything.

[ottawaadventurer 5114]

This just seems like a no-brainer to me. you pay. Then you play. Why on earth would it be any different. You're not in a restaurant or a bar - you're privileged to be where you are, and your SP is taking far more risks than you are. If you're not willing to pay up front, this isn't the hobby for you.

[Guest S****an]

Reese's observation that many times the lady will not actually check the donation out of politeness/professionalism is also my experience. My greatest fear is accidentally shorting the lady - the practice of putting in an envelope or otherwise separating it from other cash in your wallet and counting it 2 or 3 (or 10, for us nervous types lol) times to make sure it is correct goes a long way to avoid potential embarrassment.

[MissJaded 1359]

Interesting thread and very reasonable responses!

 

I have thrown-off a lot of hobbyists and clients / potential clients, because I go a step further than most SPs...

 

Prior to an initial session, I actually require a pre-session consultation and monetary deposit. I feel that this pre-session consultation allows both myself and the hobbyist to become more comfortable, and more connected, prior to our first session - this process also provides me with a certain amount of safety and security. Now, I realize that this practice is uncommon with FS SPs, but it is actually a very common practice with Fetish Girls, Pro submissives, and Pro Dominants.

 

In regards to the question of providing the tribute envelope upfront, to my mind there is no question - the client either provides the envelope upfront or myself and my friendly cattle prod will quickly and confidently show him the exit.

 

My time is valuable. My talents, skills, and services are unique and well-honed. I have been working in this industry for several years, and I have references available from past and current clients.

 

To my mind, any trust issue should be cleared-up in advance of the first session... otherwise, as previously mentioned by a few individuals... it may impact the experience for both parties.

 

Happy kink!

[stevecurious 42059]

To be honest I have only read the thread title and the original post in the thread and I felt I read enough in order to reply.

 

The standard practice is to give the lady her gift promptly upon arrival. Either her arrival or yours depending on whether it is an in call or out call situation. Any change in this time honored tradition can cause a feeling of uncomfortableness with the lady which you will not enjoy.

 

Gentlemen we must keep in mind that this is a unique industry with somewhat unique rules and guidelines concerning behavior, etiquette and compensation. Deviating from the norm is generally not a move a wise man would wish to make.

 

After all if it 'aint broke, don't fix it...payment protocol that is!

[booty_lover 117]

If you're not willing to pay up front, this isn't the hobby for you.

 

No need to be rude; he is only asking a legitimate question. And btw, I have seen a number of SPs in Montreal that tell you that if you are not satisfied don't pay. This is because they are sure they provide top notch service and let me tell you that all the men who see them end up paying.

[Megan'sTouch 23875]

No need to be rude; he is only asking a legitimate question. And btw, I have seen a number of SPs in Montreal that tell you that if you are not satisfied don't pay. This is because they are sure they provide top notch service and let me tell you that all the men who see them end up paying.

Unfortunately, I can see many hobbiests taking advantage of this policy.

[ottguy 110]

I alwatys pay up front, no problem with that and I agree with the ladies here, the donation should be paid before. I wannt to ask the ladies or anybody else here if its normal to get ripped off. I see escorts regularly, the one I've been seeing over a year has left the industry and for my last 4 encounters I had 4 different SP's. I kindly paid for one hour because I like to be with the lady, talking, massage stuff like that. I feel the 30mins sessions are always rushed and its not as sexy as a full hour. But on all 4 occassions I paid the full hour and been out within 20-30 mins. Am I going into the wrong places? Am I doing something wrong? I always feel so robbed afterwords. Maybe just bad luck. I'd love to find a decent lady that I can trust and I would very gladly become her regular customer.

 

Merci

Shaun

[fortunateone 156618]

I alwatys pay up front, no problem with that and I agree with the ladies here, the donation should be paid before. I wannt to ask the ladies or anybody else here if its normal to get ripped off. I see escorts regularly, the one I've been seeing over a year has left the industry and for my last 4 encounters I had 4 different SP's. I kindly paid for one hour because I like to be with the lady, talking, massage stuff like that. I feel the 30mins sessions are always rushed and its not as sexy as a full hour. But on all 4 occassions I paid the full hour and been out within 20-30 mins. Am I going into the wrong places? Am I doing something wrong? I always feel so robbed afterwords. Maybe just bad luck. I'd love to find a decent lady that I can trust and I would very gladly become her regular customer.

 

Merci

Shaun

 

 

Even tho you feel like the half hour has a rushed feeling, you should always book the half hour option when meeting an sp for the first time. If things are going smoothly, and it looks like extending is an option for both of you, you can opt to extend. If not, you are done anyway at the half hour rate.

 

Just think about the things that worked with your reg, and when contacting an sp let her know. Is it that you like to have a massage to start, or that you like a longer prep time before moving to bj or fs, and let her know your expectations a bit. Sometimes an sp will move things along at a faster pace if she doesn't know you yet and doesn't know if you are one of those guys who does fs for 20 or more minutes and that's why you want the longer session time. That's if you go in and say you aren't looking for msog, for example.

 

I'd say find an sp who does a sensual massage start and see how that works out for feeling less rushed.

[The General 11309]

I have to say that I always (while almost always) take the 1 hour time, since I think that is really what is necessary to enjoy the full experience. I don't think it really is worth booking just have an hour, and beside, for most the half hour is about 2/3 of the hour cost anyway, so I think mostly the pricing encourages the whole hour too.

 

I tend to be variety and enjoy that, but lately some of the experiences have become ho-hum to speak and I am usually putting my boots on about 2/3 - 3/4 of the way through the hour. It could be a bit of me, but the ladies, even with research, seem to be more about getting through rather than enjoying the experience, which then for me lowers the sensuality of the time.

 

Perhaps it is time to start re-visiting rather than re-exploring the variety of ladies out there.

 

And remember guys, hand over the donation up front. If you think you got ripped off (bad experience) you would be paying anyways, so don't think holding back the cash is going to motivate the lady any better, in fact it is likely to do the opposite.

[Guest ****ven]

We've all been ripped off on multiple situations. Personaly, I find that a card or envelope that is placed in a mutually accessible place (ie on the dresser) is a mutual way to ensure that nobody gets ripped off!

 

Then let the fun begin sans financial concerns from either party...

 

:)

[rdymango 673]

If I were to put myself in an SP's shoes, I suspect I wouldn't be as "into the moment" if it was sitting in the back of my mind whether or not this client was going to pay for my services. This is not a business transaction where there is recourse like sending someone to collections or court for moneys owed for services. This is a personal business transaction and the sooner you take care of the business transaction, the more likely you are to have a succesful personal transaction. "More likely" being the key term because SP's don't offer money back guarantees. I suspect the likelihood of you having a really great time with your SP is diminished if you hold back on the donation until the end. That being said, I've been burned a few times and just have to cough it up to "live and learn." I've also been burned in retail transactions where I've felt ripped off and when I can't get my money back, I simply don't go back. SP's are in the business of people and sometimes people just don't click; sometimes people aren't as advertised; sometimes you just catch them on a bad day. Pay up front and you'll improve the likelihood of both of you enjoying your time together.

[haida41 214]

great thread. i have always given the donation on arrival. i have been burned only once and just won't repeat. i had one sp in vancouver that said "oh, don't worry about it, i trust you. most times just do your homrwork and you should,'t have a problem.

[Kubrickfan 12836]

I thought I had responded to this thread but apparently not ... The first and foremost way to establish a comfort level with the lady is to put an envelope out with her name on it where she can see it and mention that to her within the first minute or her (or you) arriving. It may be a little different after a few visits and there is an established level of comfort and familiarity.

 

The chances of the client getting ripped off are pretty darn low, and she is going to feel a LOT better knowing business has been taken care of.