how much info is appropriate

[Guest f***2f***]

RG I agree with most of what your saying and indeed what CAT and the other SPS are saying too. However there are people in sensitive professions and businesses that cannot be too careful with their personnel information. It's also the case that people need a great deal of discretion due to personal relationships. Not all SPS are created equal as indeed not all clients are created equal. It's just that simple.

I stand by my original point that everyone is free to exercise options and if intense screening is uncomfortable there will be a certain number of people who will not go for it. It's just that simple. Many ladies have stated they are OK with that as they are comfortable with their business model and it's working for them.

[VictoriaJolie 64127]

Yes you are free to stand by your point per your own experience and we can by our point per our own experience of experience of fellow sp.

 

As for too sensitive work to provide information. I'm sorry i have to disagree with you as Elliot Spitzer never provide his real name or information on the request of the agency ..He is the one that was careless by wiring money trough his bussiness.

I have gents that explain their situation when i request work information as they could not provide me a reference and i always provide them a way to do it without compromising themself

 

VJ

[SamanthaEvans 166767]

I have a huge interest in protecting my clients' privacy. It's part of the foundation of my business. If I like a client, I want him to come back and see me again. If I don't like him that much, I want nothing more to do with him after he leaves.

 

Concerns about privacy are important. If you're new to seeing paid companions, or new to a particular city, your safest option is usually with a very well-established companion. She cares enormously about her reputation, not only for the quality of companionship she offers, but for her professionalism, including her sense of confidentiality.

 

If we take the time to review the sensational stories of men who have been outed for seeing paid companions, we will find that the source of the information about those men is never the companions. The men are discovered because the madam of the agency or establishment has had her records seized (her crime, to my way of thinking, is only that she didn't keep sufficiently secure records), or because someone has seen the man going into and out of the brothel, or because he's told someone else (a friend, a family member, a spouse or gf) what he's doing and they've reported it.

 

Try to remember that companions want what clients want: to exchange some time and some personal, private pleasure for some money in ways that are safe and satisfying and then to part company with no strings attached and no further expectations or worries.

[mrrnice2 157005]

As a patron of paid companions I have come to appreciate that there can be critical issues of trust and that these issues do indeed apply to both parties in the arrangement.

 

As a patron, one wishes to feel assured that you are going to meet with the lady that you thought you were going to see, that you will be in a safe environment, that the interchange will be fun and respectful, and that your own personal information is treated confidentially.

 

All of those same considerations are due to the lady as well.

 

For the patrons of CERB we have an opportunity to communicate ahead of time through PM's or sometimes email, texts or even through telephone calls. We can read contributions of the SP in the forums, we can read recommendations and I suppose even contact other gentlemen who have seen a specific SP. With time and care and due consideration, one can be reasonably assured that your privacy and other concerns will be met.

 

For the SP's there is potential in some cases to do the same sorts of things. There is a difference however. It is their body that they are choosing to share with us, in many cases it is their own personal space that they are choosing to share with us, and ultimately it is their decision as to whether to meet us.

 

I am only surprised with the apparent number of SP's who do take last minute bookings, and I always wonder just how safe they really are?

 

Every encounter involves two people, each of whom have their own ways and means of providing for their own protection. Each party has the absolute right to determine what it is that they need to know in advance. If and when that need to know becomes too much for the other party, then a, "Thanks, but not this time," is all that is required, from either one.

 

I do believe that it is uneven ground, and that it is the women who need to be even more careful than the men. So do what you need to do to feel comfortable and safe. We will work with it.

[futileresistenz 28253]

Cannot be more persuasive an argument. Well done, Cat!

[Guest t**i***n]

I wish some of the volunteer boards and committees I've sat showed the same decorum and respect for other's opinions as I've seen here. I think I gained a new perspective on this as well, perhaps the more information that a SP requests, the higher the level of discretion a client might expect as perhaps the SP is more experienced, and treats this business as an occupation that she must protect by protecting me. Initially I was concerned about many of the things discussed in this thread, even after concluding that the SP could get my name, occupation and much more just from my cell # which I readily provided to other SP's. I think it was the directness of asking for the information as her first reply to my initial request that "spooked" me, no banter back and forth, no discourse, just who are you and where do you work and what is your #. Perhaps I am missing out on something special, but regrets are useless. Thanks again, I enjoyed reading everyones comments and this should help me avoid future awkward introductions.

 

I was trying to arrange an first meeting with a SP and when asked for my given names, place of employment and #, I replied that I wasn't willing to provide that much info and would not pursue a meeting. The response was that I was a jerk and best beware of her. Was I out of line?

Posted via Mobile Device

[roamingguy 300292]

I wish some of the volunteer boards and committees I've sat showed the same decorum and respect for other's opinions as I've seen here. I think I gained a new perspective on this as well, perhaps the more information that a SP requests, the higher the level of discretion a client might expect as perhaps the SP is more experienced, and treats this business as an occupation that she must protect by protecting me. Initially I was concerned about many of the things discussed in this thread, even after concluding that the SP could get my name, occupation and much more just from my cell # which I readily provided to other SP's. I think it was the directness of asking for the information as her first reply to my initial request that "spooked" me, no banter back and forth, no discourse, just who are you and where do you work and what is your #. Perhaps I am missing out on something special, but regrets are useless. Thanks again, I enjoyed reading everyones comments and this should help me avoid future awkward introductions.

 

If I'm reading your post right, instead of regrets, contact the lady again if your ok with being verified and you still want to see her. Explain to her your being spooked and understand now why she requires verification.

Provide the information, I'm sure she'll be understanding, and you can have an encounter with her

Whatever happens, good luck

RG

[Phaedrus 209521]

How do you think we are cutting our client base down by screening and asking for information?

 

Well, of *course* you're cutting it down from what it could be by screening.

 

The point, of course, is that the part of it you're cutting out is the part that you probably didn't want in the first place :)

[Katherine of Halifax 113932]

RG I agree with most of what your saying and indeed what CAT and the other SPS are saying too. However there are people in sensitive professions and businesses that cannot be too careful with their personnel information. It's also the case that people need a great deal of discretion due to personal relationships. Not all SPS are created equal as indeed not all clients are created equal. It's just that simple.

I stand by my original point that everyone is free to exercise options and if intense screening is uncomfortable there will be a certain number of people who will not go for it. It's just that simple. Many ladies have stated they are OK with that as they are comfortable with their business model and it's working for them.

 

People are in a sensitive profession and buisness and can't be to careful. Really, do they risk your safety on a daily basis?

 

I would like to state that I am in the buisness of creating happiness and pleasure. Do you think I am going to jeopardize my reputation by putting your information in the public eye. No SP with a good reputation is ever going to do this and why in the world would you think we would.

 

We have worked very hard to gain trust with our clients, do you really think this is something that will happen? If you do you are not choosing ladies that are known and trusted. Perhaps put your trust in a reputable lady and see how wrong you might be.

[Barney 2550]

Phone Number and first and last name should be enough information, its not like you are filing your taxes, LOL, get it Taxes, this site needs a little humor now and again.

[Guest E*******h S******s]

Phone Number and first and last name should be enough information

 

As has been previously explained in various and sundry ways.....not your call to make. Each SP uses whatever screening processes she needs to in order to protect herself.

[AndyRew 100]

As has been previously explained in various and sundry ways.....not your call to make. Each SP uses whatever screening processes she needs to in order to protect herself.

 

Exactly. No service provider should feel uncomfortable with whom they are possibly going to be seeing. If they require first name, last name, phone number, DOB, physical size statistics, a recommendation from another provider, they are in the right, as well to ask for any other information they so desire.

 

Personally, I can understand asking for place of employment. Certain SP's want to know that they are going to be 'pencilling' in individuals they can rely on to show up on time, to be hygienic and capable of paying for their services. I have no qualms about letting a service provider know where I am working and has been the subject in the past. If you're a bus-boy, line cook or some McD's worker, I can understand them being slightly hesitant for wanting to schedule you in; not that you may not be an upstanding individual, but the negative stereotype that may accompany such profession.

 

I have my own personal limits in what I am willing to share and if that means that I do not get to share in the experience of a SP, so be it, I do not become bothered by it, I understand each one has their own preferences/screening methods. Just the same, I have my own screening methods for which SP's I am willing to see and personally feel I am equally in the right to have said 'preferences'.

[Guest g****4]

This is a business and business is about risk management and making oneself available to the public. If your business plan is to have a stringent screening process then you are going to have some people who are not willing to undergo that process, that is up to them.

 

 

 

I would say that like any business, this business will follow the market rules. If the majority of the clients will not agree to provide specific information about themselves then the majority of the SP will not ask for it. If on the other hand the majority of the SP insisted on having a specific piece of information, it will be an industry standard (eg. a call back number).

Personally I don't feel comfortable giving my work info to any one that I don't know. I understand the reason why a SP may want it, but I simply don't agree.

[roamingguy 300292]

People are in a sensitive profession and buisness and can't be to careful. Really, do they risk your safety on a daily basis?

 

I would like to state that I am in the buisness of creating happiness and pleasure. Do you think I am going to jeopardize my reputation by putting your information in the public eye. No SP with a good reputation is ever going to do this and why in the world would you think we would.

 

We have worked very hard to gain trust with our clients, do you really think this is something that will happen? If you do you are not choosing ladies that are known and trusted. Perhaps put your trust in a reputable lady and see how wrong you might be.

 

I as a man who participates in this lifestyle, a lifestyle that has brought me in contact with many wonderful and great ladies will only say that the concern about sensitivity and discretion, while on quick and first glance, understandable, should really be of little or no concern at all. Prior to an encounter, the lady doesn't know who she is meeting, all she wants is to protect herself. And really, the lady is the one at risk, not the man

It's hard for the outside world (those who don't partake in this lifestyle) to be expected to get rid of their stereotypes if those who do partake in this lifestyle still cling to those stereotypes

I do share the concern about work, only because I'm in a shared office.

But I do happily provide other verification information, with no evasiveness,

Finally, I'm not telling anyone what to do, everyone has their own comfort levels. But you are missing out o seeing some great ladies by not verifying

RG

[Mikeyboy 27133]

I used to be very uncomfortable giving out any information about the "real me". This site has changed the way I think about this quite a bit. A site like this can help you to find the SP's who are serious about this business. Most of the ladies here are interested in building a good reputation and a regular client base. These ladies are not going to risk this by being indiscrete or careless with your information.

 

It's easy to figure out who these ladies are based both on their posts and their reviews. There are also many hobbyists whose opinions I've grown to trust. If I see a reco by certain people, I believe that this is someone who is professional and can be trusted.

 

Once again.. Thank you CERB!

[Andee 220524]

Not to sound sarcastic, but sometimes I feel like saying you're not "that important" that I am going to jeopardize my safety, security and eputation to go around finding ways to ruin your lives. If you have nothing to hide and don't cause us any harm, you need not worry about anything.

 

End of story.

[Guest f***2f***]

Personally, I can understand asking for place of employment. Certain SP's want to know that they are going to be 'pencilling' in individuals they can rely on to show up on time, to be hygienic and capable of paying for their services. I have no qualms about letting a service provider know where I am working and has been the subject in the past. If you're a bus-boy, line cook or some McD's worker, I can understand them being slightly hesitant for wanting to schedule you in; not that you may not be an upstanding individual, but the negative stereotype that may accompany such profession.

 

.

 

Oh please....I used to do all those kind of jobs years ago and I'm not a sketchy person or would I ever visit a lady without having cleaned myself up after work.

 

The issue here is about personal information and a need to know. I've already stated on a couple of posts that SPs set their own screening requirements and I agree that none of us have the right to tell them how to conduct their business. All I was saying is that I'm not willing to share that info and that is my right.

 

My original point was that not everyone is comfortable giving out their last name or their work nbr...I still stand by that point. I have been hobbying for almost 3 years. I do see upscale ladies and I resent the implication by one lady that I don't...many of the SPS I've seen who've responded to this thread in fact...and I've never given any of them my last name or work nbr.

 

Angela you may very well be upstanding and don't think any or us are important enough that we can't give you our personal info but believe me there are people who can ruin lives by knowing too much info. You don't want me to know your last name and your home phone nbr do you? Nor do I want people to know mine or my work nbr.

This definitely is the end of this issue for me.

[EmilyRushton 253372]

 

Personally, I can understand asking for place of employment. Certain SP's want to know that they are going to be 'pencilling' in individuals they can rely on to show up on time, to be hygienic and capable of paying for their services. I have no qualms about letting a service provider know where I am working and has been the subject in the past. If you're a bus-boy, line cook or some McD's worker, I can understand them being slightly hesitant for wanting to schedule you in; not that you may not be an upstanding individual, but the negative stereotype that may accompany such profession.

 

I so have to dis-agree with your comment here, what occupation someone holds, does not not make me decline a visit with them. If I am asking for someones work info it is to screen them to see that they are who they say they are, not for any other reason than that. I have NEVER had an issue with anyone booking an encounter and not being able to pay for it, and regardless to what one does for a living that does not make them any more hygienic that the next person

[SamanthaEvans 166767]

Personally, I can understand asking for place of employment. Certain SP's want to know that they are going to be 'pencilling' in individuals they can rely on to show up on time, to be hygienic and capable of paying for their services. I have no qualms about letting a service provider know where I am working and has been the subject in the past. If you're a bus-boy, line cook or some McD's worker, I can understand them being slightly hesitant for wanting to schedule you in; not that you may not be an upstanding individual, but the negative stereotype that may accompany such profession.

 

I don't discriminate on the basis of where someone works. Someone's profession or place of employment is no guarantee that they will be on time or able to pay my fee. My actual experience is that middle-income men are more reliable and less likely to try to cut a deal for themselves after they've arrived than are the very wealthy. The men who find that they need to save up in order to see me are often among the best clients because they see a meeting with a paid companion to be a delightful, rare treat, something to be savored.

 

Requests for information are simply ways to ensure that I'm as safe and secure as the gentleman is. I never ask for employment information first. There are other ways to satisfy my needs. But if those aren't available, confirming employment may be a reasonable option.

 

I know several companions in the US who require clients to have a membership with a verification service and also ask to see a piece of government-issued photo ID, such as a driver's license, to confirm their identity when they arrive. Prostitution is illegal in most of the US and so companions have a legitimate concern about being entrapped by law enforcement officials.

[mrrnice2 157005]

 

If you're a bus-boy, line cook or some McD's worker, I can understand them being slightly hesitant for wanting to schedule you in; not that you may not be an upstanding individual, but the negative stereotype that may accompany such profession..

 

 

Just as an aside, the comment about stereotypes struck a nerve.

 

IF we all reacted and responded to prevailing and existing stereotypes, then perhaps none of us would have discovered the women of CERB and therefore learned just how wrong stereotypes are.

 

I have had my mind opened to an incredible world of intriguing women and THAT negative stereotype that certainly was there is gone forever.

[fortunateone 156618]

Angela you may very well be upstanding and don't think any or us are important enough that we can't give you our personal info but believe me there are people who can ruin lives by knowing too much info. You don't want me to know your last name and your home phone nbr do you? Nor do I want people to know mine or my work nbr.

This definitely is the end of this issue for me.

 

 

I can't see why you say you are only seeing upstanding sps, yet you clearly don't find any of these upstanding and reputable sps (who have good reputations they would not want damaged) worthy of any kind of trust from you.

 

fwiw, trying to compare not wanting an sp to have your work # with not having hers is faulty. You do have her work #, her work location (which actually has a huge potential danger if you turn out to be a disreputable client). Far and beyond anything you provide to her. It just does not compare, to be used as an excuse, sorry. If you do not wish to provide something fine, but please don't try to also justify it in a way that suggests ALL of the sps you have seen and are currently thinking of seeing cannot be trusted with more than your phone #. If they can be entrusted with your nekkid body, I think they could be trusted to keep all of your other secrets.

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

In life, each person takes (and of course should take) whatever general steps or precautions they need in order to make themselves feel comfortable or safe. Doing so doesn't mean that they distrust everyone else or that they should be considered to be implicitly judging others as being "unworthy of any kind of trust". Everyone is ultimately responsible for their own safety - their personal security is not about others, it's about themselves.

 

I live in a small town. I lock my doors. A couple of my friends call me paranoid, because "you don't have to do that here". So be it - but that's what I need to do in order for me to feel comfortable and safe. Locking my doors doesn't mean that I think everyone in my town is a thief, or even that I have the slightest specific suspicions about anyone in particular not being "upstanding", either. What it does mean is that I've come to notice that humans aren't perfect, and that inevitably, however scarce thieves may be here in rural Nova Scotia, given enough time, a thief will almost surely come along. And I have things in my house that I would be very very sorry to have stolen. So I lock my doors. My friends and neighbours are welcome to think me paranoid. But I'm adamant that they're not welcome to feel that my locked door implies that I'm judging or insulting them (either as specific individuals or as a collectivity). If they feel insulted after I explain myself, that's their problem, not mine.

 

The same logic applies to all walks of life and all situations, including escorts and their clients. Folks shouldn't feel insulted at another person's politely taking whatever precautions they feel necessary in order to avoid personal catastrophe. Each may believe the other's precautions are unnecessary; each may feel the other's concern to avoid personal disaster is overblown; each may feel that they themselves are worthy of more consideration than the other is. But such comparisons are all irrelevant as far as I'm concerned. Each must do what they require to feel comfortable, and each should gracefully and respectfully grant the other freedom to peacefully do so as well. Without taking offense.