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I think it is pretty hard to specifically define a couple words on a page as soliciting or playful. It really depends on the 'relationship' between the 2 people and the context. If someone is saying 'come see me' on numerous hobby pages with no existing interaction than thats surely soliciting. But I prefer to edge on the more liberated side. After all lets not forget what this sight is about. I get tickled when a lady I might have had a small initial interaction with (even me viewing her page) posts a message. It doesn't mean I need to respond. And some ladies who I know do post random messages on my page. Some can just say 'hi' and I get that warm feeling.

However, the original thread is not about posts on guest pages. It is about the loss of visiter information. Understanding and supporting the reason for its removal...I look forward to the optionality of its return. Cub

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Isn't there an option to turn off guestbook already? And I believe members have a choice to accept or delete the guestbook message don't they?

Edited by Paradise Spa

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We all have our different views on this issue of losing such a wonderful function IMO. Let's keep this conversation clean, nice and positive. Let's learn and discuss why we like and miss it or not :icon_smile:!!

 

Big Positive Hugs All Around,

Lexy

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Okay ladies. The mod finally caught me .... but I must clarify !! I am not a stalker !! I am just a sleeper, a creeper, a dirty rotten peeper ;) haha

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Guest E*******h S******s
For security reasons i have disabled this feature and i am working on a way to let each user hoose to turn this on or off....problem is this feature is being abused.

 

Urgency to remove this is because one of the ladies has a real bad stalker we cant get rid of. he is watchng her profile and contacts everyone who visits her profile and says bad things about her so no one sees her. i have banned him about 10 times and he keeps coming back with new ip and sneaking in. its adding to his obsession and hurting her business too so for now i disabled it.

 

also... some of the sp's post on every persons wall who visits them and this is also getting complaints.

 

I am looking for a solution that would enable each person to turn on or off this feature.

 

The solicitation issue is secondary to the safety of one of the providers who's safety and business has been repeatedly compromised. It saddens me that so many people are arguing over such a relatively minor issue as to what does or does not constitute solicitation rather than being outraged that one of our own is being stalked in such an ugly fashion. The visitor function isn't worth a lady's safety irrespective as to how many people might find it useful to their business.

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outraged that one of our own is being stalked in such an ugly fashion. The visitor function isn't worth a lady's safety

 

I can't nominate this post at the moment (guess I gave Elizabeth too much love last night.. er, I mean.. noms!) but I wanted to quote her for truth again - it's not about solicitation or convenience, someone was being stalked and that's what we need to find ways to stop.

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I respectfully disagree, Emily. When I see "Come and see me soon" to me it comes across as soliciting. So if I think that way, so will others and that is what the guys don't like. It also makes the Poster seem a little pushy or desperate.

 

Just my two cents.

 

I'm a guy and I don't mind it. But, context is important. I don't have a problem with a lady acknowledging my visit to her profile and inviting me to come see her. I do have a problem if she appears out-of-the-blue on my page with an invitation to see her. This is a form of advertising and there is a special forum available for that purpose.

 

 

As for the original topic. The ideal solution is to always have the visitor panel turned on and give the profile owner the ability to keep it private (only visible when viewing your own profile) or public (visible to anyone viewing your profile). A third "semi-private" option could be considered where only friends of the profile owner can see the visitor panel.

 

It seems most (if not all) users enjoyed the private benefits of this feature (i.e. seeing who's visiting their profile and seeing how many visitors they have). The stalker issue resulted from making this information public. Perhaps then, an even simpler solution would be to provide no optionality and just enable the visitor panel as a private feature (i.e. only visible to the profile owner).

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The solicitation issue is secondary to the safety of one of the providers who's safety and business has been repeatedly compromised. It saddens me that so many people are arguing over such a relatively minor issue as to what does or does not constitute solicitation rather than being outraged that one of our own is being stalked in such an ugly fashion. The visitor function isn't worth a lady's safety irrespective as to how many people might find it useful to their business.

 

I can't believe I missed that post by the MOD. There's always gotta be one sick apple in the bunch to ruin things for everyone. I am very upset now and concerned for this lady. Whom ever you are my thoughts and prayers are with you, your safety comes first.

Why are some people such nut jobs?? With concerns to our fellow SP. I have to agree that this was the right and quick move by the MOD and much respect is given to the MOD for doing this!!

 

A solution that would enable each person to turn on or off this feature would be awesome!!

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I agree with bewlayb's suggestions. For the ladies' safety the option to view visitors profile should be restored only where it is private to the lady herself (I as a guy have absolutely no business to know what other guys visited a particular lady - if it is the matter of a recommendation then we have the reco boards for that info). IMO I think the ladies would be safer by knowing who has visited their profiles but restricting that info to outsiders.

Posted via Mobile Device

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Yes Elizabeth safety first and common sense goes without saying :) Arguing? Huh? Not on cerb :)

 

The solicitation issue is secondary to the safety of one of the providers who's safety and business has been repeatedly compromised. It saddens me that so many people are arguing over such a relatively minor issue as to what does or does not constitute solicitation rather than being outraged that one of our own is being stalked in such an ugly fashion. The visitor function isn't worth a lady's safety irrespective as to how many people might find it useful to their business.

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Thanks PistolPete for bringing this to our attention. Hopefully Mod can bring this feature back. It's so sad that there are the crazies out there. I'm sure there are technical reason's for not disabling the one specific profile.

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This is a truly nice-to-have feature - not critical, but it is sorely missed already. If nothing else it, keeps us in touch with who is touching our spaces.

 

G11

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I agree with G11 this is not an essential tool but a valued and fun one none the less. Hopefully after the long weekend we can find out (from Mod) if it was purposely removed or just an accident.

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For security reasons i have disabled this feature and i am working on a way to let each user hoose to turn this on or off....problem is this feature is being abused.

 

Urgency to remove this is because one of the ladies has a real bad stalker we cant get rid of. he is watchng her profile and contacts everyone who visits her profile and says bad things about her so no one sees her. i have banned him about 10 times and he keeps coming back with new ip and sneaking in. its adding to his obsession and hurting her business too so for now i disabled it.

 

also... some of the sp's post on every persons wall who visits them and this is also getting complaints.

 

I am looking for a solution that would enable each person to turn on or off this feature.

 

 

Steve... this is from MOD page 3 or 4.... we'll have to give it time.

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Steve... this is from MOD page 3 or 4.... we'll have to give it time.

 

Thanks Old Dog and to the members who PM'd me the same thing. I have been out of the country for a bit and only keeping light tabs on Cerb, obviously I didn't read the thread thoroughly enough. Sorry to have re-hashed a previously discussed topic.

 

On that note kudos to Mod for taking the steps he has taken...and an appropriate oops goes to me for skimming and not reading.:oops:

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With this in mind, I think we must give kudos to the mod for acting in such a manner to protect one of our own.

 

I am grateful that he has not named names which could exacerbate the situation our provider finds herself in... and I am thankful that we can show the understanding in the perhaps temporary loss of a feature that we have enjoyed.

 

That my friends, is why CERB is a great community.

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I respectfully disagree, Emily. When I see "Come and see me soon" to me it comes across as soliciting. So if I think that way, so will others and that is what the guys don't like. It also makes the Poster seem a little pushy or desperate.

 

Just my two cents.

 

I appreciate your "two cents" Angela. But, If "come play soon" or "hope you come see me soon" etc, are considered soliciting then wouldn't even a simple hello be considered soliciting? From what I understand of cerb rules, to be considered soliciting you must say on their guestbook (which I have seen before...) "Hi I am available today, great rates, call me xxx-xxxx" Otherwise you are just considered to be friendly........ I have NOT and never would solicit on anybody's guestbook my availability location, services, rates or phone number. Anyway, i have never heard of any hobbiest being annoyed or feeling pressured by any lady they have recently viewed contacting them with a one liner-spread the love-type message......;) if i am wrong.....sorry gents.....its just in my nature to be super flirtatious. I have written these same message on SP's guestbooks.....I was never implying they pay me a visit........;) but....if they wanna come and play....... :)

 

Again great job MOD on doing whatever you can with making things safer, but if someone is being stalked or harrassed to this degree the police should be involved and able to track him much faster......;)

 

 

xoxoxoxoxo

Come play soon to all the sexxxy cerbers!!!

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Guest E*******h S******s
Hey if its THAT serious....I thought we were all about safety first....?

 

The SP may not be in physical danger, but her reputation and business is. While that is a serious situation for an advertiser to be in on this particular board, I fail to see what exactly the police could do. MOD shutting down the visitor function has stopped the behaviour. If MOD can't fix it so that we can have control over how others can view our visitor section, I would hope that the majority would be ok with it being shut down permanently so that the SP in question will no longer have to deal with this. I think that would be "safety first".

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Anyway, i have never heard of any hobbiest being annoyed or feeling pressured by any lady they have recently viewed contacting them with a one liner-spread the love-type message......;) if i am wrong.....sorry gents.....

I'm having a difficult time associating a "one liner-spread the love-type message" with "come and see me soon".

Sorry.

 

Just for your information, page 3, post #26:

For security reasons i have disabled this feature and i am working on a way to let each user hoose to turn this on or off....problem is this feature is being abused.

 

Urgency to remove this is because one of the ladies has a real bad stalker we cant get rid of. he is watchng her profile and contacts everyone who visits her profile and says bad things about her so no one sees her. i have banned him about 10 times and he keeps coming back with new ip and sneaking in. its adding to his obsession and hurting her business too so for now i disabled it.

 

also... some of the sp's post on every persons wall who visits them and this is also getting complaints.

 

I am looking for a solution that would enable each person to turn on or off this feature.

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I promise this is my last post to this thread as everytime i try to explain or express myself i am bombarded with negativity, I promise i was not being snarky.....I find that offensive. anyway, i will leave this thread for the other ladies to continue on with. thank you for at least hearing me out ;) goodnight. xoxoxoxo

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Unfortunately this thread went a little south, OK a lot south.

 

The issue at hand is that we have a lady that has a " real bad stalker ".

This is a serious problem that needs to be addressed and the Mod is doing what he can do to help the situation. If the police are needed to prevent the situation from escalating, so be it, after all it is her personal safety in jeopardy.

 

In the meantime while it is being addressed, lets hang tight with positive attitudes.

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Well I was kinda happy that I asked the question about the profile visitor issue and started this thread.

 

I like to think there has been some good debate about the pro's and con's of the messages left on ones profile.

 

There was a wise comment made earlier where the individual could shut off that guest book feature or simply delete the message on their own profile.

 

I also fully endorse the reasoning behind the shut down of the option, but also do really admit I miss it. I'm sure either way it will all work out for everyone's benefit.

 

 

Over the time, I often enjoyed the flirting between a lady and myself,but it has never came across to me as bold, solicitation or in fact desperate on my part or ever from the ladies that have visited my profile and left a message, even if she said" Missing you" The actual set up of a date was/ is always done behind closed doors through pm's or emails.

 

The ladies here always have shown professionalism through great flirting,no different than us gents making a nice comment about welcoming the lady,or her photo's or in fact telling her to have a great day.

 

It is/was a communication tool used by the vast majority of us here, with keeping within the guidelines and rules.

 

So kudo's to you ladies, for doing that (gentle flirting I love it) over the time, and as Mr.Green said....

 

 

"minority" in this case can ruin things for the the majority. (Well said Mr.Green!)

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