Guest t**obb**** Report post Posted September 23, 2011 Of course, why not? Background: I had an argument with a few fellows who regularly watched porn and attended strip bars. Through banter, it came out that they do both, but wouldn't want to marry the stars. I said, how can you entertain yourself and not respect the actors? Isn't this a bit misogynistic? They said they were not women haters, nor did they think the activities were demeaning, but they just wouldn't want to marry the actors. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Code Blue 3585 Report post Posted September 23, 2011 It's OK for them to "dip their wicks" everywhere, but not to be the "dippee". Don't get me started on the role of marriage in society....... The commercial exchanges in this lifestyle are at least transparent and honest! CB Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted September 23, 2011 Personally for me, when it comes to marriage,(if I was looking, which I'm not) the first, most important thing, do you love her, and does she love you. Then, are there any for lack of a better word, complications, that can be worked out (ie guy likes seeing SP's, is he willing to stop, lady is porn star, will she stop)...or can you both be married, accept the complications and live happily ever after Well maybe a bit simplistic, but you get the idea RG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Megan'sTouch 23875 Report post Posted September 23, 2011 Monogamy is overrated. Sex workers have a lot to offer when it comes to relationships. Posted via Mobile Device 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Icebreaker 3938 Report post Posted September 23, 2011 In theory yes, however I think some factors would have to be considered. Is the lady still working? If so would there be jealousy that could creep into the relationship when your wife filming scenes with other men. I think this would be the biggest factor because it would only be human nature for a guy to get jealous in this circumstance and this from my understanding is what kills relationships with ladies in the adult industry. Depending on the type of job the other partner has are they comfortable with having their partner working in the adult industry (I.e. People in the public eye, those with sensitive jobs, those with particular religious beliefs etc.). This can be a factor even if the lady is retired as this can always come back to the surface. Can the partner handle it if one of their buddies happens across her work and all of a sudden your buddies become your partners newest fanbase? In my personal life i have dated dancers in the past and although these relationships did not work out it was not connected to the her employment. In terms of a pornstar I could definitely see myself marrying or getting into a relationship with a retired pornstar (my personal opinion is that the past is the past). I would rather know up front so if any questions arise we can be readybto deal with them. At the end of the day you are getting into a relationship with person as an individual not with their career (or at least that's the way it should be). This is just my opinion. Posted via Mobile Device Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Malika Fantasy 144625 Report post Posted September 23, 2011 There is two type of women: those that you want to fuck those that you want to marry (yes they can go together:)), but often...they don't mix... People want to fuck sex worker, strippers and porn stars...but don't want to marry them. or date them. because it isn't the same. Don'T judge me that is what my last date told me and more then one person Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wildstallion 1819 Report post Posted September 23, 2011 I somewhat agree with the above, I love my wife and love the sex, I only want her to have sex with me and nobody else but I want to have sex with the porn stars, strippers and SP's, I guess I am just selfish and I am OK with that. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Maverick 2873 Report post Posted September 23, 2011 From my limited experience of reading interviews pornstars have done or following various pornstars on twitter, most of them do not seem like the kind of women I would get along with on a personality basis, and no amount of physical attraction can overcome a personality with which I do not get along. That said, there are some who appear to be smart, witty, and interesting women, so my answer, as usual when it comes to questions about categories, would be that it goes on a case by case basis. I would marry some pornstars, and not marry others, but being in the "pornstar" or "sex worker" categories would not automatically rule a woman out for relationship potential. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Winnipegcub 21293 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 Well some full disclosure. First I could never make a blanket statement that I would not marry a pornstar. That is more what people do and not necessarily everything about who they are. So for me who they are is much more important. Haven't met any pornstars and recognize that my 'relationships' with SPs are such that I only really get to know part of them. But I have come to know a few quite deeply and them me. Could I marry one of them...oh yeh! But I do have a yeh but. As much as I am ok with what they do/did...I don't think I could marry someone who stayed in the business. Thats not being judgemental or hypocritical - it is more about my own insecurities that I don't think I could be strong enough. I hope people don't take offense to that - I'm truly just trying to respond to the thread openly and honestly. Now I have to go rehearse my proposal. Cub Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
qwertyaccount 15793 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 Would I? Maybe, how big are here boobs? Just kidding, I like all boob sizes! To me, it would depend on the lady in question, as it would with any lady of any profession or history. Some sweet innocent looking college girls have seen more action than a porn star every would. The term "takes one for the team" isn't just in the movies. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
loopie 15358 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 I don't think it's hypocritcal or misogynistic to admit that all you want out of a certain woman is sex or sexual stimulation. Just because you wank to images of some lady in videos doesn't mean you accept, support, or like everything about her. I enjoy art or all forms made by all sorts of assholes. Most of my favorite writers, musicians and filmmakers are a bunch of needy tempermental assholes. I wouldn't want to have most of them over for dinner, but I love their work. I'll gladly pay to see them perform, but I wouldn't want a personal relationship with them. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
twdick4u 100 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 i would love to marry a pornstar i love sex that's why i'm on here ....right? so if she would do me, i would save all the money i would have spent on sp's Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest t**obb**** Report post Posted September 24, 2011 This is good stuff all, and coming from what I would expect to be an open minded demographic! so are we saying marriage is linked to what you believe "Porn Star" means? pornstar = person performing entertaining but deviant acts (no marriage) pornstar = person with an ok but publicly vilified job (unlikely marriage) pornstar = person with a past uncomfortable for you (unlikely marriage) pornstar = person with baggage (marriage) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 This is good stuff all, and coming from what I would expect to be an open minded demographic! so are we saying marriage is linked to what you believe "Porn Star" means? pornstar = person performing entertaining but deviant acts (no marriage) pornstar = person with an ok but publicly vilified job (unlikely marriage) pornstar = person with a past uncomfortable for you (unlikely marriage) pornstar = person with baggage (marriage) Interesting post, and now with the shoe on the other foot Prospective Groom-watches and is entertained by those performing deviant acts (not a guy to marry?) Prospective Groom-has no problem spending his money watching a lady perform a publicly vilified job (not a guy to marry?) Prospective Groom-enjoys watching "deviant???" acts (watching porn) which can be described as a past which could make ladies uncomfortable and consider him not suitable to be a husband (not a guy to marry?) Prospective Groom-if found out he watches porn, is that baggage, and btw who here doesn't have some baggage (not a guy to marry) No one who participates in this lifestyle, be it as a SP/Client/Pornstar/watcher of pornography etc is in any position to pass judgement on anyone else...we are all opposite sides of the same coin and people living in glass houses shouldn't throw stones And I'm not saying pornography is deviant, but if the argument is that being a pornstar is deviant, then by the same token, isn't watching a pornstar and pornography just as deviant? A quick rambling RG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
etasman2000 15994 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 I have relationships with people. I don't have relationships with professions. 12 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mrrnice2 157005 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 There is two type of women: those that you want to fuck those that you want to marry (yes they can go together:)), but often...they don't mix... People want to fuck sex worker, strippers and porn stars...but don't want to marry them. or date them. because it isn't the same. Don'T judge me that is what my last date told me and more then one person I respectfully disagree with your basic premise/generalization Malika. Even just one short year ago I may have agreed 100% but not now. We only need look at what Etasman contributed here just above. Relationships are with people, not professions. I can only respond based on MY experiences, and I still know that I am not looking to marry anyone, nor have a serious relationship that might ever lead to marriage. However with that being said, IF I were seeking marriage, then I am very comfortable that I could marry a pornstar or a sex worker, provided that all is open and disclosed. A relationship involves sex for sure, but it also involves mutual support, mutual respect, a willingness to let their partner do what they need to do or want to do and accept them for who they are. As the man in that relationship I feel that I would have to be a very special person, because it is so far outside of the 'norm', but those special men, or women, are out there. I know with certainty that some sex workers are married or have SO's and are living very happily together. Would it be easy? Probably not for most. However, I believe that exceptional women who meet exceptional partners would be able to be incredibly happy together. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LeeRichards 177238 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 Yup I would !! 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spud271 47779 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 You marry the person and not the profession. People have far too many hangups and judge too quickly. I personally would have no issue with marrying a porn star. I'm no saint, so why would I hold that against anyone. People would probably feel the same way about what I do for a living. Who would want to marry someone who does what I do, and yet I was married. Never be too quick to formulate an opinion, love can come at you from the most unexpected place. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest f***2f*** Report post Posted September 24, 2011 Hmm interesting thread. The sex will not be the same in a committed relationship as it is in the movies. I mean let's face it the lady is acting for the gratification of others. SPs are acting for the gratification of others too, some are better actresses than others. There are some ladies who genuinely like the sex (I hope) but I know that in their private lives they want more...they want an emotional connection. For an SO that's what most of us want so I guess if I ask myself, "could I be emotionally connected to a pornstar or an SP?"...hell yes! could I handle her out with different guys having sex for a profession...probably not but you never know till you're in the situation I guess. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SteevesTheKing 100 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 If I like a lady, and she likes me, then her past doesn't matter...only our future together. I'm a big and tall, woman-loving but slightly bicurious Haitian-American guy from Boston living in Ottawa. That's a lot for most women, lol. Open-minded and flexible ladies of all hues are rare. Only a foolish man would turn one away. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
loopie 15358 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 I do think the conflict of whether or not you could marry a pornstar goes well beyond moral judgement. I would think that most of us here are not judgemental of somebody making a living as a pornstar (I could be wrong). But just because you are perfectly accepting of this as a legitimate career doesn't mean you could live with the demands that career would place on your wife and therefore on your relationship. I used to date a nurse. Nursing is a well-respected profession and I don't think there's anybody out there who judge somebody for having that career. But still, being in that relationship was impossible because of her career. I prettymuch never got to see her. If I happened to be awake at 3:00 AM when her shift ended, I might get to talk to her for twenty minutes between when she came in the door and when she passed out. She was constantly sick and emotionally and physically drained. I liked her as a person, and when we started dating she only worked 4 days a week, so we got to see each other. But the career was really what killed the relationship. I still respect the career, and I still like her as a person, but the relationship was just impossible. So a relationship with a pornstar has its own demands and stresses beyond simple moral acceptance of the career. In fact, I think moral acceptance of the career in general is the easiest step. Living with those day-to-day stresses and demands and still building a healthy loving relationship is the hard part. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest ***t***iv*** Report post Posted October 11, 2011 Monogamy is overrated. Sex workers have a lot to offer when it comes to relationships.Posted via Mobile Device monogamy. not in our nature; go forth and multiply and all that. check. straying from it leads to the loss of happy' date=' comfortable, loving relationships; maybe even marriages. check. yup. agreed. monogamy is totally overrated. Additional Comments: SPs are acting for the gratification of others too, some are better actresses than others. There are some ladies who genuinely like the sex (I hope) but I know that in their private lives they want more... I agree with this statement. Oddly enough, I notice it contradicts many statements made on the thread about what a client wants... I suppose that the beauty of it all is that the mystery keeps the real truth a secret. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
afterdark 100 Report post Posted October 11, 2011 I agree 100%. Being married for a number of years, while also being a hobbyist, I've honestly had more intimate relationships with certain SP's than with my own spouse - it's true. Though we still love each other, being totally honest and looking back, I probably would have never gotten married had I known. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
