Why can boys do it but we can't...?

[Guest S**a*Q]

So I have a question/comment/rant...

 

Bumping threads and recos is not allowed... Right?

 

From what I know, I am not allowed to post on my own reco to say Thank you to the gent that wrote a comment for me. I am supposed to send a message to the individual in question as to not "bump my thread".

 

If girls can't bump their own thread or we can't bump threads of other girls, how come guys can just keep posting things like "Great reco" or "I have an appt booked with her." and other sentences that aren't recos, but push the reco thread back to the top?

 

In one recommendation thread there are 9 postings, yet there are only 4 actual recos. The rest are just guys saying "Good job" to the poster.

 

Come on...

 

People might think I'm being bitchy, but I am just pointing out the facts. I've had many a recommendation lately so it's not that. I just hate that we (being females) can't bump threads but it's okay for the boys?

 

Someone answer my question please and thanks :D

[Code Blue 3585]

It would seem fair to have one approach for both sides. :idea:

 

Maybe the "Powers that be" would be able to enlighten us.

 

CB

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

Well, I'll guess why the ladies aren't allowed to bump their own recos ... bumping their thread to the top of the heap is considered to be a business advantage, so the business owners are prohibited from trying to directly benefit themselves in this way. Providers are confined to advertising in the announcements area. Otherwise, aggressive providers will engage in bumping-wars amongst themselves - ladies have complained about this in the past.

 

The reco threads are, according to one theory, the customer's playground, and, unless a particular customer is a "shill" for a lady, the customers don't have a financially-motivated interest in commenting about her just to bump the thread into a more prominent position. Discouraging discussion about the ladies, and constricting more communication channels among clients, could be a two-edged sword, as some would say it has been after the the ad-areas were made client-free posting zones.

 

On the flip-side of this fairness equation, note that customers are not allowed to post in the ad area - which is the providers' exclusive playground.

 

I'd guess, off the top of my head, that the biggest hurdle to converting the recommendations area into a "no discussion" area - "strictly recos only", is the moderation headache this would create. I think it would likely require a big investment in time and effort for the moderators to decide which posts are "legitimate" and which posts aren't, based the content of each one.

 

I'm not saying it's right, and I'm not saying it's wrong. I personally don't care one way or the other. Just my thoughts for further discussion regarding Sara's question.

[Guest E*******h S******s]

Well, I'll guess why the ladies aren't allowed to bump their own recos ... bumping their thread to the top of the heap is considered to be a business advantage, so the business owners are prohibited from doing so to their own direct benefit. They're confined to advertising in the announcements area.

 

The reco threads are, according to one theory, the customer's playground, and, unless a particular customer is a "shill" for a lady, they don't have a financially-motivated interest in commenting about her just to bump the thread into a more prominent position. Discouraging discussion of ladies could be a two-edged sword, as some would say it has been in making the ad-areas client-free posting zones.

 

On the flip-side of this fairness equation, note that customers are not allowed to post in the ad area - which is the providers' exclusive playground.

 

I'd guess, off the top of my head, that the biggest hurdle to converting the recommendations area into a "no discussion" area - "strictly recos only", is the moderation headache this would create. I think it would likely require a big investment in time and effort for the moderators to decide which posts are "legitimate" and which posts aren't.

 

I'm not saying it's right, and I'm not saying it's wrong. I personally don't care one way of the other. Just my thoughts for further discussion regarding Sara's question.

 

With respect to the ad areas, we can't even bump our own threads. We have to create a new ad every time and we are limited to one ad for every 24 hour period. I think everyone would agree that ads aren't discussion threads, they are ads. By the same token, recs aren't discussion threads either. Its one thing to bump a rec with another rec, but to post on a rec with "Great reco....glad you had a good time" bumps somebody else who actually took the time to post a rec of another lady. To my mind, its just a subtler form of shilling.

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

With respect to the ad areas, we can't even bump our own threads. We have to create a new ad every time and we are limited to one ad for every 24 hour period. I think everyone would agree that ads aren't discussion threads, they are ads. By the same token, recs aren't discussion threads either. Its one thing to bump a rec with another rec, but to post on a rec with "Great reco....glad you had a good time" bumps somebody else who actually took the time to post a rec of another lady. To my mind, its just a subtler form of shilling.

 

One ad every 12-hour period.

 

Yes, ad-threads used to be discussion threads. It was fun while it lasted, a significant part of the texture of Cerb - ad-threads used to be great places for interaction and communication.

 

Your definition of shilling doesn't match mine; for me, shilling is something done by non-arms-length parties.

[Guest S**a*Q]

Yes, ad-threads used to be discussion threads. It was fun while it lasted, a significant part of the texture of Cerb - ad-threads used to be great places for interaction and communication.

 

On that note...

 

I stopped putting thought into my ads when this ended. Now I'm just the cut-and-paste style of ads, where I just change the dates, rates or area...

 

I miss the cool ads sometimes...

[cat 262460]

The problem with regulating posts in the various sections comes from what has motivated the posts. On these threads there is a monetary incentive that some have abused in the past and the result is limited options for contribution now. It may not be "fair" but it protects against those that take advantage of it. Adding a comment to a reco is often done because it is somewhere for newbies to add to their post count or regulars to support their fav SP. It is a gray area that people often don't realize exists.

 

I am not a supporter of the "regulate out bad behavior" school of thought, but when there is multiple complaints about something rules get put in place. People need to be more aware of their actions when they are doing something motivated by personal gain because all it does is ruin it for everyone...

 

cat

[Kimberly-Shea 28280]

A simple solution could be if a gentlemen wants to leave a comment, he can do so by giving rep points and leaving whatever message he chooses there.

 

This way they can show their appreciation/agreement without needlessly bumping the thread.

 

As well, the rec threads will become much easier to skim through being that all posts are actual 1st hand recommendations.

 

Kim

[PistolPete 61421]

It is an area where gents can thank other gents for their input or starting a recommendation. Rep points are already delivered at times in rec area. This section is not a place for gents not to skim through, but to take their time to read through the comments and the actual recommendations regardless what type of comments are made. It is an area that had dramatically change from where recs were just in threads when I started in 2007, and the change is for the better. Why would we want to make more significant changes? There was threads previously about gents that do not or have not or may not care to write recommendations, so do we think that if we remove or not allow comments made, this would be for better for this area ? Or is this just about who might be on the first page of recommendations and who is on the third page? Gents that are seeking a lady will take the time to skim or in fact like I use the search button above and type in the ladies name, out spits her ads, her recs etc etc, then you read her rec. I use the search button for ladies that I have not met and possibly like to. If a new recommendation pops up I see nothing wrong in thanking that gent for it.

[Nicolette Vaughn 294340]

I think some type of reco template should be implemented where only people who have seen the provider can post without making endless comments. The template would also be more beneficial as I have seen recos where they were 2 sentences strung together and not much of an effort was made whereas the same member would write a novel on another SP which would appear to be bias. By using the template, things would be more seamless and equal. If members wanted to agree with the mmber who wrote the reco, they could give them a rep point.

 

I have heard from both hobbyists and SPs alike that if an SP didn't have at last one page of recos, that people would think something is wrong with her. For new SPs, you have to work hard to get recognition. And on the other hand, I have seen many recos where there were pages and pages but it was all fluff and not too many recos where the member took the time to write something that would give insight into a encounter for potential clients of SPs/MAs. Guys don't want to read a reco that says "Yeah, I concur! She's great!" Well what the heck does that tell someone who is interested in seeing the lady? Not much and frankly anyone could write that. I find that many guys aren't interested in the reco writing process and with the template, it would already be set up to sort of just fill in the blanks.

[Gabriella Laurence 301887]

I think some type of reco template should be implemented where only people who have seen the provider can post without making endless comments. The template would also be more beneficial as I have seen recos where they were 2 sentences strung together and not much of an effort was made whereas the same member would write a novel on another SP which would appear to be bias. By using the template, things would be more seamless and equal. If members wanted to agree with the mmber who wrote the reco, they could give them a rep point.

 

I have heard from both hobbyists and SPs alike that if an SP didn't have at last one page of recos, that people would think something is wrong with her. For new SPs, you have to work hard to get recognition. And on the other hand, I have seen many recos where there were pages and pages but it was all fluff and not too many recos where the member took the time to write something that would give insight into a encounter for potential clients of SPs/MAs. Guys don't want to read a reco that says "Yeah, I concur! She's great!" Well what the heck does that tell someone who is interested in seeing the lady? Not much and frankly anyone could write that. I find that many guys aren't interested in the reco writing process and with the template, it would already be set up to sort of just fill in the blanks.

I do not feel a reco template would benifit anyone, especially not the gentlemen writting them. After all, the gentlemen who take the time to write the recos should feel free to write about their own experience in the way they see fit (according to the cerb rules); if they chose to say "I saw so and so last week and had a great time with her"

that should be their choice. If they chose to write a "novel type" reco, they should also feel comfortable doing so.

A reco is a reco... On this one, I say to each their own.

 

On the other hand, I do agree with Kimberly on the following:

A simple solution could be if a gentlemen wants to leave a comment, he can do so by giving rep points and leaving whatever message he chooses there.

 

This way they can show their appreciation/agreement without needlessly bumping the thread.

 

As well, the rec threads will become much easier to skim through being that all posts are actual 1st hand recommendations.

 

Kim

[Touch 57501]

This has been an illuminating thread for me.

 

But sorry Nicolette, I really dislike templates for recommendations. I don't participate in review boards that require a template format. Just because this is a recommendation board (not a bipolar review board) doesn't make a required template format any less distasteful to me.

[AndyofHalifax 15339]

... The template would also be more beneficial as I have seen recos where they were 2 sentences strung together and not much of an effort was made whereas the same member would write a novel on another SP which would appear to be bias.

 

Not to pick on the particular phrasing of this, but are we not allowed to be biased towards our personal favourite SPs?

 

And from what you are proposing, would it not just end up being essentially a list of people who have seen the SP?

[mrrnice2 157005]

I think some type of reco template should be implemented where only people who have seen the provider can post without making endless comments. ........

 

I find that many guys aren't interested in the reco writing process and with the template, it would already be set up to sort of just fill in the blanks.

 

 

I think that I would tend towards NOT wanting a template as it might result in very quick posts that do not contain the personal thoughts and feelings that might compliment that SP and as well help prospective clients make choices and decisions.

 

I do read reccos, but not as a matter of routine. I also write reccos, and again, not as a matter of routine. I have said many times that I have never had a bad encounter and that is absolutely true. Neither though have I written a recco every time.

 

For me, I take pride in writing reccos. As every single encounter that I have had has been different, so too have my reccos all been different. I believe that if I wrote every recco with the same format, the same words, and using the same pre-defined format, then at some point the reccos would become meaningless.

 

Since reccos are obviously an important factor for many, and since the presence of a recco on the main page does draw attention to that SP, I wonder if Sara does have a point here. Inconsequential posts bring an SP to widespread attention without having anything new being added to existing reccos.

 

Perhaps I am misunderstanding the context here, but I for one when I do want to look at reccos, that is what I would like to see.

[Emma Alexandra 123367]

The problem with regulating posts in the various sections comes from what has motivated the posts. On these threads there is a monetary incentive that some have abused in the past and the result is limited options for contribution now. It may not be "fair" but it protects against those that take advantage of it. Adding a comment to a reco is often done because it is somewhere for newbies to add to their post count or regulars to support their fav SP. It is a gray area that people often don't realize exists.

 

I am not a supporter of the "regulate out bad behavior" school of thought, but when there is multiple complaints about something rules get put in place. People need to be more aware of their actions when they are doing something motivated by personal gain because all it does is ruin it for everyone...

 

cat

 

it's usually the same guys commenting on the reco ads...if they like the reco then pm the writer or better yet comtact the provider....just my thoughts

[Phaedrus 209521]

So, first up, I have to agree with the main premise of this thread; adding a comment just to say thanks to the reco thread doesn't add much to it, and I think rep points and PMs, as already suggested, are entirely adequate for this purpose.

 

However... Nicki, I'm afraid I have to disagree with you on what should be in recos...

 

I think some type of reco template should be implemented where only people who have seen the provider can post without making endless comments.

 

I disagree with this as a requirement. It may be useful, within some limits (more on this below) but it also has drawbacks...

 

The template would also be more beneficial as I have seen recos where they were 2 sentences strung together and not much of an effort was made whereas the same member would write a novel on another SP which would appear to be bias.

 

A couple of things here.

 

Firstly, we guys have very different takes on what we want to do with a reco, and how much effort to put into it, and what to talk about. Some folks write epic tales of their sexcapades and describe everything in great detail and glorious technicolor, and clearly have fun doing so and re-living the encounter. Others just aren't comfortable with posting this sort of thing - personally, while I'm happy to read about the great time someone else had, I simply don't wish to give details of anything that happened with the ladies I've met once the clothes came off. But that's just me, and I'm quite happy that other people have different ideas on this.

 

As for bias... yes, you'll always get that. I'll unashamedly admit that there are some ladies that I've enjoyed spending time with more than others. I've written recos for ladies that I'll definitely go and see again, come hell or high water. I've also written recos for ladies that I probably won't see again, usually because we just didn't connect that well, and I'm likely go back to someone that I connected with better, or perhaps go on and make new and exciting discoveries elsewhere (for which there's never enough time). This doesn't mean that someone I didn't connect with doesn't deserve a reco, or that other people shouldn't go and see her, because the fact that I didn't quite click with someone doesn't mean she won't become the next guy's ATF, and it'd be a shame if he never went to see her because she didn't have enough recos.

 

It should also be noted that when someone's had a really fantastic time this can quite often come out in the way the reco is written, and this sort of feeling and enthusiasm level can be just as useful as anything that's actually written.

 

By using the template, things would be more seamless and equal. If members wanted to agree with the member who wrote the reco, they could give them a rep point.

 

The problem I have here is that you seem to be equating 'seamless and equal' with 'better'. I disagree on this point, as you can probably tell :)

 

I have heard from both hobbyists and SPs alike that if an SP didn't have at last one page of recos, that people would think something is wrong with her. For new SPs, you have to work hard to get recognition. And on the other hand, I have seen many recos where there were pages and pages but it was all fluff and not too many recos where the member took the time to write something that would give insight into a encounter for potential clients of SPs/MAs.

 

This is true, but this sort of thing really comes down to how much effort guys are prepared to put into researching someone we haven't seen before. If we're just going to look at the length of the reco thread, as opposed to actually reading it... well, fine, but we're probably missing out on some gems. However, this is our loss.

 

Guys don't want to read a reco that says "Yeah, I concur! She's great!" Well what the heck does that tell someone who is interested in seeing the lady? Not much and frankly anyone could write that.

 

Yes we do, and it's still useful. It tells me that someone else went to see the lady in question, and that he had a good time. It all adds up on the positive side of things. And the point is not that anyone could write that - the point is that someone did. That alone seems to be more than most guys bother with, and I'm not comfortable with the idea of being less than welcoming to guys who may not have the time or inclination to write a great deal. I'd far rather have a very quick "I saw X, and it was great" than nothing at all.

 

It should probably be noted also that this may be a function of what previous recos for a lady are like. People probably don't want to make it look like their reco is a virtual cut-and-paste of someone else's, and it's especially hard to add something new and different to a lady's reco thread if she's got a lot of recos already, or if someone has already written a small novel about her (those can be a really tough act to follow), or if you're in the not-discussing-the-gory-details camp.

 

I find that many guys aren't interested in the reco writing process and with the template, it would already be set up to sort of just fill in the blanks.

 

And here we have a good reason for a template. Yes, if a template gives new or occasional posters a prod in the right direction and makes writing a reco easier for them and thus results in more recos, we all benefit and that would be a thoroughly good thing. But it'd be a great loss if the template became mandatory and limited those who wish to offer more, or inhibited those who didn't wish to fill out all of it.

[Kimberly-Shea 28280]

If a new recommendation pops up I see nothing wrong in thanking that gent for it.

 

Again, thanking him, showing appreciation/agreement or adding a personal comment can easily be done with the rep points option without needlessly bumping a thread.

 

No camaraderie lost?

 

Kim

[capitalman 3861]

I'm kinda with PistolPete on this, I don't look at how many or where in the standings a rec is...I look for a lady in different ways like looking at her photos, her personality and her ability to carry on a conversation with me.

[bcguy42 38594]

When I first got here and discovered there were people I wanted to know more about, my sequence was (and is) to go to her profile, read what she has to say about herself, glance at the number of friends (the number not being too important, just an item of curiousity), peruse her album(s), check out her website if she has one, then go to the recommendations. Since I was looking for a specific person, the relative ranking on the first page of "R", for example, was irrelevant. The content of the reco's was (is) what interests me and the "thanks" posts were (are) just so much white noise. Having done all of that, I'd check out a sampling of her posts. Then I would have a basis to decide if this was someone I wanted to contact.

 

A lot of work but it results in a lot of joy. :)

 

So Sara, I think I understand what prompted your "peeve" but IMHO, to the in-any-way-serious hobbyist, the "bumps" don't enter into the equation. Personally, I wouldn't be impressed by someone who made their judgement based on someone being higher in the ranking because of a number of "Oh yeah, great!" posts.

 

But, then again, I'm not wired like everyone else.

[fortunateone 156618]

re: templates. I've only seen templates used on one site, it being a review site, and its sole purpose was to reduce the experience into an easily searchable tool for menu items, like a checklist the thing lists daty, price, age, bbbj, etc etc. I think it was so tedious to fill out many reviewers disliked it, and so "listy" it took away the voice of the reviewer and away from the experience for the sp by too much "sameness".

 

re: ads and not being able to bump or reply in them, but posting new ones. imo, I am loving the new sites that have a bump and/or renew feature. I do not have to re enter the info, or create new things each and every day. I go, click bump, and gone. In addition, instead of me (after one month) having 30-60 ads posted (assuming I do the 2 a day one every 12 hours), I only have one in constant rotation. This makes it simpler for anyone viewing ads as well. Instead of scrolling past the ads already seen, you simply scroll down the page and all the ads are from different advertisers because all the advertisers (hopefully) are bumping their ads not posting new ones. New ads postings gives an illusion of quantity and choices that really aren't there.

 

re: recos. It's my opinion that the sp in the reco should be allowed to thank the reviewer, and add a comment if she likes. I doubt very much if such a comment is going to significantly "bump" the reco to the top, since she will most likely post her thank you within 24 hours of it being posted. I'm sure there will be the rare occasion where she is unable to post her thankyou for a week or so, but I kind of doubt it. I think it is a shame the sp cannot thank the poster, since she's met him and had the same good time, but random other people, some of whom have never seen her but just giving out a random comment, have the ability to "bump" it lol.

 

 

I don't see that as a question of fairness, tho, just good manners and good business. A reco should receive a thank you comment from the sp, if the reco is a recommendation, who could possibly object to having the lady thank them?

[Kubrickfan 12836]

Bumps ... templates ... etc ... respectfully, I dont see what the problem is here.

 

I really don't think most of the guys focus at all on the recos on the first page, but instead look for a certain lady in the alphabetized list. And the brief conversations that occur within a reco thread are really the last vestige of a true discussion on cerb of a given lady, and I thought the guys a while ago were asked by the mod to avoid messages that were simply a "thanks" - type message.

 

I dont think there are a lor of efforts by the guys trying to bump any given reco. thread on a particular lady.