The Ethical Slut

[TGirl-Kay 7485]

Hi Mrnice,

 

I enjoyed The Ethical Slut and found it to be a good romp through polly thinking. I would have to say though that I did find it a little one sided toward the writers point of view.

Have you read Opening Up? It's not quite as fun a read as The Ethical Slut but it does offer a more gentle view of polly.

Both of these books complement each other well.

 

Cheers Kay

[mrrnice2 157005]

Thanks November. I shall see if I can get it. As I said, I am on a learning curve for sure. I did buy The Ethical Slut and it has now been passed on to an SP who had not read it and she has it booked to move on to another. :)

 

We should start our own lending library.

 

Take Care

[Lowdark 5613]

I haven't read the book, but, isn't it perhaps a touch hypocritical for someone who deserves rightful recognition and respect for their chosen lifestyle (polyamory) judging someone else's (monogamy)? Both lifestyles should respected and accepted. As long as someone enjoys the choice they've made, all concerned parties respect each other and no one is harmed, nothing should be wrong with it. Maybe I'm misinterpreting the impressions and if so feel free to correct me but it seems like a small double standard from an author(s) who you seem to preach tolerance.

[JuliasUndies 7288]

I agree that both lifestyles should be respected and not shunned with a narrow minded attitude.

Both lifestyles can be equally challenging and rewarding, I'm sure. It all depends on the person and what works for them.

I won't read the book because it doesn't interest me in the sense that I dont need to educate myself on poly-lifestyles. I accept them, that's all. I don't need to agree or disagree, it's not up to me to judge another lifestyle.

[Guest C*****tte]

I have read the book a few times over the past 15 years. I think you have to consider the time of its writing to understand the perspective of authors. The mid 1990s were different times. People in open (and honest) relationships were seen as aliens. Often still are. But it was a huge thing then. I am currently single but I was in a long term open relationship for much of my adult life. Back in the 1990s I was approached by men all the time saying they were swingers or in an open relationships but that their wife didn't know. That's not open. This is the kind of thinking that was going on and hence the backlash you perceived in the book's tone.

 

People who have open relationships who judge those who say they are monogamous but in fact have cheating aspects to their relationships is a different thing than judging those who are truthfully monogamous.

 

An interesting and short blog post on the subject.

 

http://www.viewshound.com/relationships/2011/10/5/polyamory-the-myths-vs-the-reality

[GrenadeMan 280]

Thanks for the recommendation on the book. I plan to get it.