Question to the beautiful SP's out there...

[Guest h****hedl]

Original post quoted in Elizabeth Saunders Reply #4 (scroll down)

 

Hi Ladies,

 

I am sorry.

 

Please, if you have read my previous post (that didn't have very much initial thought put into it), I apologize that it has offended you. I swear I didn't know what I was starting. A personal fault I am working on is to think before speaking. Honestly didn't know the magnitude of this subject.

I was always taught growing up that there is no such thing as a stupid question......I believe I have found one exception to that!

 

Please accept my apology,

 

hb

[April Dawn 12207]

I would say there is no polite way to ask somebody how many clients they see and I don't think a high or low volume provider is any more or less sexually safe.

Posted via Mobile Device

[Andee 220524]

Not only is it impolite, it's also none of your business. Period.

 

And I echo April Dawn's comment - that there is no guarantee that an SP who sees fewer clients than another is necessarily SAFER.

[Guest E*******h S******s]

Hi Ladies,

 

I have a question: "Would it be appropriate to politely ask an SP how many clients she sees in day?....If so, how is a tactful or respectful way of asking for that info?"

 

Explanation of why I'd like to know:

 

The beauty of Cerb and this industry in general, is that there is a surplus of ladies available to please at the potential client's fingertips. With so many choices, I was thinking of narrowing down the field of choices, by wanting to choose a lady that is reserved, cares about herself and her body, and enjoys playing SAFE.

 

As part of caring about yourself, it would be important to know your limitations, and treating your body with respect. I do believe this ties in directly to the number of partners you allow yourself to be intimate with...

By all means this is not intended to insult the SPs that enjoy a surplus of partners throughout a day/night - whatever floats your boat - I just wouldn't be interested in meeting with you versus a lady that only sees 3/day (example only), absolutely no offence intended!!!! Far be it from me, to tell anyone how to operate their business...we all have to make a living ;) Just a way to make the decision process easier!

 

Please, if you have feedback in this subject that can enlighten and/or educate me further, I would love to hear your thoughts!

 

I'd like to take this opportunity to thank the lady SP's out there for giving less confident, insecure, or just thrill-seeking guys the time of their lives!!! Bless you ALL!!!!

8)

hb

 

I really don't understand your reasoning. A lady that sees 3 clients a day, 5 days a week will see approximately 780 clients a year. A lady that sees 5 clients a day will see approximately 1,300 clients a year. Whether she sees 780/yr. or a 1,300/yr., how does that cut down on your perceived risk?

 

That being said, I believe that you have a skewed perception of this industry. I would wager that any lady that sees 1 or 2 clients per day, 5 or 6 days a week, would consider herself to be doing fairly well. There may be days when she sees 3 or 4 clients, other days when she sees none.

 

While I understand that you are not intending to cause offense, I would be offended by the question. By suggesting that a lady who is busier isn't taking as good care of herself or her body than one who is less busy is judgmental and erroneous.

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

By suggesting that a lady who is busier isn't taking as good care of herself or her body than one who is less busy is judgmental and erroneous.

 

 

Very well said! Although I fear that now, because of this skewed view, those of us who respond may be viewed as revolving door operators.

 

I am of the belief that the ladies who post on Cerb have their well being as well as mental and physical health as a top priority. Monetary gain does not negate these basic needs.

 

How we choose to model our business, it is our decision and at our discretion and is NO one's concern but our own. Do your homework and get a feel for the type of PEOPLE we are. Yes, we are people with real lives, real families and real friends. Why would we jeopardize any of this?

 

Yup, insulting for sure.

[Guest h****hedl]

Original post in reply #4

 

I apologize to all that have been offended. Certainly wasn't intended that way. Won't happen again.

[Katherine of Halifax 113932]

I will always be offended by this question, there is no nice way to ask. Please don't, it will spoil an otherwise great time. :icon_smile:

[Malika Fantasy 144625]

As the others SP state it is none of your business. A lady that see 5 peoples is probably as safe as someone that see 4 people a week.

 

Same with ladies that advertise (for example) from 8am-11 pm, they don't see 10 guys a day, trust me.

[SexxxyRebecca 57990]

I think its not because a girl see more guys than another that she doesnt take care of herself...

 

Do you really know what the girl who see 1 guy a week do in her personnal life?..........

[Sensual Erin 33935]

Well said. Would you rather be with someone casually that may have been promiscuous and take a far greater risk to your sexual health? Would you ask her how many in a day? You probably wouldn't, but this personal encounter carries far more risk.

 

I agree. Common sense and don't ask.

 

I think its not because a girl see more guys than another that she doesnt take care of herself...

 

Do you really know what the girl who see 1 guy a week do in her personnal life?..........

[Guest h****hedl]

Original post in discussion quoted in reply #4

 

Sorry to all those offended.

 

hb

[Alexandra-Sky 12606]

I echo what has already been said by other ladies above and I just want to add that not meaning offense and saying "no offense" never makes anything less offensive.

[Guest C*****tte]

This question reminds me of going to a health clinic and how the nurse was trained to NOT ask the question of how many people a sex worker has been with because the numbers (50 vs 500 vs 5000) really do not matter. Its more about the actual acts and the safer sex measures you use to figure out a degree of risk as there is always a risk unless you totally abstain.

 

If I was asked this question it would tell me that the client and I are not likely compatible. It would start our interaction off on a bad note. What happens in my private life is my business and what happens with other clients is between them and myself. I never ask a client if he uses condoms with his wife.

 

Obviously, when it comes to health care be it a client or a sex worker you need to be honest with your doctors and nurses so they can offer you the right screening and care. It is their business.

[EmilyRushton 253377]

Very disrespectful indeed....I find your question very ignorant and it really does not deserve an answer.

 

In all honesty why do you even care? How busy one provider is, has no direct result on how "clean" she is. Would you like us to ask you how many ladies you see in a given week or month (and yes some hobbiest's do see more than one a week or month)

 

The only thing that comes to mind for why someone would ask such a detailed question in regards to quantity of clients per day is that are you looking to rob someone? Volume is no indication of cleanliness... In response to your question there is no tactful or respectable way to answer the question. Your personal preferences are your own, but some should be just kept to yourself.

 

[Guest h****hedl]

Thanks for everyone's reply...glad to get the perspective from the SP side of things.

 

These responses have truly humbled me. My apologies to all you lovely ladies as I have learned just the act of reading this may strike a nerve. You are right, basing a choice on something like that, would be wrong... I assure you, I learn from my mistakes, and I sincerely apologize to all offended! I will never ask an SP how many clients she has in a day...none of my business!

 

8)

hb

[Guest E*******h S******s]

You asked whether it would be offensive or impolite to ask this question. Just because you don't like the answer doesn't mean that discussion didn't take place. You don't wish to book an appointment with a woman who sees more than X number of clients a day. Your reasoning was that you judged them to be less "safe" than women who see fewer clients per day. When you judge people, expect them to judge you back.

[EmilyRushton 253377]

Pardon me, as I thought this was a forum to discuss things and learn from others. As I have stated in my original post and a public reply post here (#11) that I was naive at first to how the ladies feel about this. Unfortunately for the ladies (right or wrong - I know...wrong!), this thought does pass through even the nicest client's mind. If you re-read the posts, you may notice the mention that I would like to "discuss" this and this isn't a forum for you to pass judgement back on me! I specifically put it out there so I can be educated or enlightened on the subject rather than just insulting the next SP I encounter!!!! Guess you missed the point.

PS - Rob someone???? Careful how you word things because that IS the most offensive thing mentioned on this thread and it is not appreciated.

My apologies if you are offended by this "DISCUSSION", but please read all of the posts on the thread by the person you are going to bark at!

Good Day

8)

hb

I was not passing judgement I was stating my thoughts, I found your question offensive as did many other ladies who replied. I mentioned "rob" someone as anyone who inquires as to how busy or how many clients a lady may see raises a red flag. Keep in mind there are ALOT of sketchy people out there and you are asking a question that someone with ulterior motives could be asking. When you ask a question on a public forum, expect a wide range of replies, some of which you may not like. I answered with how I felt and in a day and age where one can not be too careful, I answered with how I took the question that was posted - not nicely. No matter how you word the question you posted there is no nice way to ask. I did not accuse you of wanting to "rob" anyone - I simply asked a question in respones to your motives for the thread.

[Guest h****hedl]

Hi ladies,

 

Please re-read my original post as it is now revised to reflect what I have learned. Although, it wasn't nice to read all of the responses at first, I can honestly say I have learned a very valuable lesson!!!

 

Please accept my apology as it is sincere,

 

8)

hb

[sledder 496]

Cant believe you asked this! There is such thing as a stupid question - that was it! Why is the original post gone? Leave it up - the responses will go on for days!

[roger dodger 2160]

hbon, i am sorry, but as a client, i have to offer another insight. If you went to a bar and tried to "pick up " a girl, would you ask her the same question? I think you may not get the same answer you got from these lovely and respectful ladies. You would probably get a slap in the face. I think the ladies here were very respectful in the way they answered. They were just honest. I also think it's a very rude and inapropriate question to ask anyone, unless it's going to be your possible life partner. The SP's are much more aware and clean, than most girls you would pick up for a one nighter in a bar. The sp's know all the risks, as opposed to a drunk girl in a bar that may have no clue what she is doing.

[bewlayb 7480]

HB, welcome to CERB! Although I never read your original offending post, it sounds like you're trying hard to make amends. Hang in there. I assure you, it can only get better for you from here on in.

 

Unless of course you ask the same question again.

[Annessa 22743]

Hi ladies,

 

Please re-read my original post as it is now revised to reflect what I have learned. Although, it wasn't nice to read all of the responses at first, I can honestly say I have learned a very valuable lesson!!!

 

Please accept my apology as it is sincere,

 

8)

hb

 

I'm seeing that you are new to this site as you said in your OP. revising and changing your original post only confuses future users as to what the following discussion is about and generally just makes the whole thread useless to future "learners"....also adjusting your post to be more sugarcoated doesnt tend to work either as from what I've seen your angry posting to the lady in question might always be quoted as done here.....Call this unsolocited advice if you want but you might want to consider apologizing in your replies to the post and leaving the original ones....dont worry, we will see that you have learned your lesson, but when you edit and change your posts like you did above you make it so future gents might not be able to learn those lessons along with you.

 

Good luck.

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

Leaving this particular case aside ...

 

I happen to agree with Annessa, I hate post edits if they have the effect of making the subsequent thread confusing. I've had other people's after-the-fact post-revisions leave my later responding-posts look like I was saying something that was completely deranged (even more deranged than usual, I mean).

 

On the other hand, there has also been criticism on this board for not editing a post that had sparked controversy. It was stated that the apology made by the "offender" was obviously not sincere - the evidence for the supposed insincerity being that if they had been sincere, then they would have edited their original post to which others had taken offence.

 

There's just no fixing these things to everyone's satisfaction.

[Andee 220524]

Hi ladies,

 

Please re-read my original post as it is now revised to reflect what I have learned. Although, it wasn't nice to read all of the responses at first, I can honestly say I have learned a very valuable lesson!!!

 

Please accept my apology as it is sincere,

 

8)

hb

 

The key word here is "revised". Yes, you edited your original post, when you realized how offensive it was. Perhaps you should be directing people back to what you originally wrote (as quoted by Elizabeth Saunders in post #4) which is what we were responding to you, not your new revised version.

 

You are just digging yourself in deeper by backpeddling now by declaring that you would never actually dare ask the question. So why start the dialogue to begin with.

 

I agree with what others have said that you did not like the answers that were given, and so you revised your post to try and save face. Just because you put the caveat that you don't mean anything offensive, does not mean it wasn't so. It is more offensive now, that you didn't leave the post as is and man up to what you originally said.

 

A bit late after the fact. The barn door has already been closed.

 

Enough said.

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

Well said ange and wit. If your apology is to be viewed as sincere you must be willing to own up to the original comment. In the future, leave your original post intact and then either defend yourself or apologize. Credibility is based on it. Just my two cents.