If a Lady doesn't....

[cat 262460]

If you contact a lady and don't get a response, do you try other methods of communication to connect with her?

 

The reason I ask is today I was alerted that I missed responding to a PM and I hate to leave a guest waiting for a reply. If I do not want to see someone I still send a "No Thankyou"; no reply isn't acceptable to me. It got me to wondering what the gentlemen out there do when they initiate contact and don't hear anything back?

 

 

cat

 

P.S. I wanted to make this a poll but couldn't figure it out...

[mrrnice2 157005]

Perhaps I have just been fortunate, but I never had the experience in which a lady has not responded. If it should happen and I did not get a response I would expect that I would PM a second time, and if there were still no response then I would drop it.

 

It is only common courtesy to respond to inquiries, and as well, it would be common courtesy for the gentleman to either continue communicating or otherwise indicate a thanks but no thanks to the SP.

 

To not respond at all by either party would be inappropriate.

[LeeRichards 177238]

A "no thankyou" Cat is indeed better than a no reply for sure and much appreciated. IMO.

 

Personally I would send a PM to you..for instance....just to make initial contact. If no reply I would send an email. If no reply, then I understand and move on.

 

If email only or text/call only is specified, then I would try it a second time and that would be it. Lord knows you ladies have many PM'S (not PMS haha, I had that initially by accident), emails, texts, whatever it may be to sort through and may miss replying....so I will always send a second contact, but halt it at that. Having said that, a second contact attempt is RARELY needed in my experience.

[jg24 3708]

Sending a PM no thanks or not interested would be good the the person don't keep sending you unwanted messages

Posted via Mobile Device

[andyottawa 100]

A "No Thank you" is very much appreciated.

 

I would try twice and if no response I just move on.

[Megan'sTouch 23875]

To not respond at all by either party would be inappropriate.

There are exceptions to this rule. I do not reply to any communication that is rude or disrespectful.

 

If a gentleman inquires but doesn't want to book, I don't need an email telling me so. I get enough emails as is without further cluttering my inbox.

[Kyra.Graves 23779]

Hey Cat - A bit of an extension on this but I think it's important for the guys to know as well as each lady is different. I appreciate when they contact me but I don't respond to all inquiries for various reasons, sometimes it's simply because I thought the inquiry was offensive and I do state that "rude, graphic and vulgar emails" will not be receive a response. I've had some introductory emails that would make Sasha Grey blush and there is no need for that so I simply delete without response.

 

Also as I state on my website that I prefer communication via email but some still insist on searching out my phone number (I don't advertise it) and calling, often I will only pick up the message a week or more later and if the call is out of date I don't want to be calling somebody and catching them off-gaurd. I do state on my voicemail that they should mention if it's okay to leave them a message and that I will only call back if they leave a specific time to call and I can call during that time but I'm not sure everyone pays attention to that as I can count on one hand the number of times I've heard those details in a message.

 

Anyway just thought I'd mention that, I agree that a well written and polite inquiry deserves a response and sometimes those can be lost in the shuffle but I would encourage clients to review your inquiry and the ladies contact page to see if there is any information you might have missed (such as did you call a lady that says "email only") before resending.

 

Cheers!

[roamingguy 300292]

I've had this happen a couple, well three times. First, I initiate contact using the ladies' preferred method of contact (email/pm/text) although I'm uncomfortable with a phone call, you can never know if you are calling the lady at an in-opportune time.

If no response (and in my three cases email) I give benefit of the doubt and send a second email (on the assumption the email got lost in cyber-world, went to spam folder and deleted, well you get the idea) maybe a week later.

If no reply, I move on. I do consider it good manners to reply, even if the lady says no thanks

In the one case, I found out the lady (no names) is in fact retired and I heard is sick. Don't know why her website and email address is still up though

As for the other two (also no names), have no answers as to why they didn't

reply, but I'm not going to dwell on it. In short, no hard feelings, I just won't see her.

And in my case, because I can only speak for myself, I don't send rude vulger emails.

My quick two cents on the subject

RG

[Boomer 33202]

Generally I would expect a response to a PM simply as I use the feature sparingly, and think I am polite and use good judgement in who I PM (I'd be surprised if I didn't get a reply from Cat based on her reputation here.). If I was ignored I would probably let it lie.

 

Sometimes though I think we have unrealistic expectations about email, send an email and there's an obligation to reply, not so. When I was still working, email was still growing in importance, and I would make time first thing in the morning and before I left for the evening, if it was time sensitive or critical they could give me a ring. There are all sorts of ways to get an email noticed, starting with an eye catching subject line or front end loading the important points in the first sentence or two (like an executive summary)

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

I state clearly in all of my advertisements that I prefer a text or an email. It is there in black and white. If you send a PM I may eventually get to it and I may even respond to what I perceive as a rude PM (you may not like the answer however).

 

It all comes down to the fact that the majority of the ladies will indicate their preferred method of contact. Unfortunately, not all hobbiest seem to be able to comply. Not sure why that is...lack of attention (not able to read to the end of the ad), inflated ego (perhaps we will make an exception just for you), drug or alcohol induced bravado (eventhough we say we are only avail until 10pm we will make an exception for you), or just plain ignorance.

 

Sorry, we don't mean to be difficult but we too have lives. We advertise our availability and our preferred methods of contact in order to accomodate reasonable requests.

 

It's a two way street where respect should be given and received. Forget the stereotypical depiction of a prostitute cause you won't find it here. We are individuals with a REAL life and deserve to be respected!

 

Sorry...a further comment...I always reply promptly...unfortunately, alot of gents leave a hanging tchad!

[Gabriella Laurence 301887]

Here's an interesting thread started by WinnipegCub: How Long to Wait for a Reply

[PistolPete 61421]

Thanks for the link, I knew it was around too. Carry on folks,but to quickly respond to Cat's question, I rather have the lady say 'no thank-you' then not replying at all. If they don't reply at all, I do not chase her by follow up pm/texts/emails . I do however may make a note of it ;)

 

Here's an interesting thread started by WinnipegCub: How Long to Wait for a Reply

[spud271 47779]

I will always try and communicate with a lady by whichever method of communication they prefer. If I do not hear anything back within 3 days, I will send a follow up message. Knowing that anything can happen for someone not to answer back, I am very understanding about it and don't get concerned about it. If I don't hear anything back within the 7 days of the second communication, I just move on. I figure 10 days is a reasonable amount of time, but I will never hold it against anyone if I do not hear from them.

[Gringo_Love 573]

Here's a perspective from a cautious, and relative newbie. For me, I want to feel some kind of connection with the person that I am intimate

with. I have yet to see an SP; although, I am interested. My experience

Is with just a few MA's. I totally understand that all kinds of reasons can explain why a lady might not return a pm ... But it definately lessens my interest. If she responds really late then at least i feel its not out of indifference....just other stuff got in the way and thats totally cool. I try to start a dialogue at that point. If i dont hear back then I move on. If I ever do contact an SP I would likely behave the same way... One pm and then wait for a response..... If none comes then neither do I. :). I mean I would look elsewhere.

[Mutau 2516]

When it comes time to open communications with a lady, the first order of business for me is to carefully read her CERB profile, any related web site, recent posts advertising her service and any possible adverts on Escorts Canada. Surely within that material there is an indication of the lady's preferred method(s) of communication. I always respect her wishes.

 

If the lady indicates that she prefers an e-mail, then that is the methodology used. People are busy and I never expect an immediate response. However, if I do not hear back from a missive sent, then I double check the lady's material to make certain that her communication preference was followed. If after 14 days I have not received a response I will send a follow-up message using an alternate communication method acceptable to the lady. If an answer is still not received then I will not pursue matters further.

 

However, one needs to be aware that there are a multitude of valid reasons which may prevent a lady from responding to someone's missive. In this day of virtual communications people need to be patient and not expect instantaneous responses.

 

If a hobbyist has followed the requirements established by the lady, if the missive is not offensive, then the polite manner of proceeding is for a reply to be sent. It is always the lady's perogative as to whether she accepts to move things further along to an eventual encounter. But I do believe that proper business communcations should at least be acknowledged.

[mrgreen760 37785]

One and done. I'm always polite and fun in my communciations. If some one doesn't have manners enough to respond, even to say no thanks, then I'm not going to chase my own tail. Pretty simple to me.

 

Peace

MG

[loopie 15358]

I try to be understanding. I know mistakes happen and PMs and texts get deleted by accident or in a moment of absentmindedness an SP might think she did reply to me when she didn't. So if I get no response the first time, I'll usually try at least once more, but then if I get no reply, I assume she doesn't want my business for whatever reason.

 

I do really appreciate a reply of any kind. Even if it's late. Like if I was trying to book an SP for the weekend and she got back to me next week and said she was sorry. Or if she's really busy and not taking on new clients at the moment, I would appreciate her writing me back to say so.

 

I will say that I like a bit of personal connection with an SP, so I prefer PMing or telephone calling over texting.

[Guest E*******h S******s]

Here is an example of a couple of emails that I won't respond to:

 

"Hi, you available today?" The gentleman provided me with no information about himself. I make it clear that I only see gentlemen of a certain age and that I require at least one reference from a lady currently advertising. If he can't be bothered, than neither can I.

 

"Hi, my name is XXX, I'm XX years old and you can contact XXX for a reference. However, I need to see your boobs before I book." If I wanted you to see my boobs before you booked, I would have shown them in my advertising. (And while my boobs may not be spectacular, they are pretty damned sweet!)

 

I also won't respond to anything graphic.

 

I will respond if the email is polite, even if he doesn't initially give me the information I require. For example,

 

"Hi Elizabeth, I found your ad on CERB and you sound like my kind of lady! I will be in town next week and was hoping we could meet Wednesday afternoon. I look forward to hearing back from you." I will respond with a pleasantly worded email asking for his age and a reference and confirming that I will or will not be available at the date and time he requests. However, if he doesn't provide me with his details in his next response, he gets filed in my "waste of time" folder.

[Gabriella Laurence 301887]

If a hobbyist has followed the requirements established by the lady, if the missive is not offensive, then the polite manner of proceeding is for a reply to be sent. It is always the lady's perogative as to whether she accepts to move things further along to an eventual encounter. But I do believe that proper business communcations should at least be acknowledged.

 

Mutau, I totally agree with you!

I will always reply to my emails or PMs if they're not 'one liners' or totally offensive.

 

What really gets to me is when you politely decline a rendez-vous with a propective guest

(for which ever reason you feel the need to do so) and in return, for being honest and turning

down the gentleman by saying no thank you, you get called all kinds of insulting names.

Something I/we/ladies could do without!

 

When this happens, it just reminds me that I was 100% correct in my choice of declining his request

and at the same time I feel relieved that I didn't have to spend one minute with someone who thought

so little of me in the first place.

 

Additional Comments:

I have to add... most times, when I decline a rendez-vous with gentlemen they appreciate the fact

that I got back to them and thank me for it. Not everyone lacks manners and respect when turned down.

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

I respond to everything pretty much immediately but...my response is equal to your message. If u r an ass I am a bitch. :)

[roamingguy 300292]

There is something else to keep in mind when contacting a lady. Some ladies tour and may not be able to immediately reply to emails.

And as for technical reasons, I know once my email (my regular email account, not my lifestyle email account) server was down for three days for "maintenance", I'm sure it has happened to others. Not to mention those who use Blackberries and the recent problems it had (what did one blackberry say to the other, nothing). And recall a while ago when CERB had it's problems, if you used pm's well back then you could have been SOL

Just saying, technical problems do happen, it's not rudeness, it's life

RG

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

It got me to wondering what the gentlemen out there do when they initiate contact and don't hear anything back?

 

If I follow a lady's contact protocol and don't get an initial response after an appropriate interval, then I'll try a second time, again following her published protocol.

 

I guess I wouldn't say that I'd never try a third time, but so far I never have.

 

... I wanted to make this a poll but couldn't figure it out...

 

p.s. How to Create a Poll:

 

First, select "Start new thread", and, on the "Post new Thread" page which then appears, enter the title and body of your regular post (which will be the first post of the thread);

 

Second, go to the "Additional Options" section at the bottom of the "Post new Thread" page, and within that section go to the "Post a Poll" option. Check the box next to "Yes, post a poll with this thread". Then enter "Number of poll options" (i.e. the number of choices that the voters will have to choose from).

 

Hit the "Submit New Thread" button.

 

The thread will be posted, but the poll will not yet be attached to it. However, at the same time, a second "Poll" screen will also automatically appear for you. In this second "poll" screen, you then enter the Poll question that will appear at the top of your poll, and fill in the specific choices that the voters can select from (the number of windows available for you to enter poll options will correspond to the number you specified in the previous step). You also select whether it's to be a multiple-choice poll or not (default is not), or whether the names of the voters will be made public or kept private (default is private).

 

Hit "Submit".

[Code Blue 3585]

I like email or PM depending on the lady's preferences. I will send a second note if the first does not get a response. I would regard my notes as accurate and respectful.

 

I did have some issues with my emails getting dumped into someone's spam folder and that is my logic for a second attempt.

 

This approach has failed me on only two occasions when I have not had the courtesy of a reply. Honestly, I tried to give them the benefit of the doubt, but in the end it is their loss not mine.

 

I would echo the comments above about the courtesy of getting a response, even if a "no". It's simply good manners.

 

CB

[Gabriella Laurence 301887]

There is something else to keep in mind when contacting a lady. Some ladies tour and may not be able to immediately reply to emails.

This is what autoreply is for...

 

autoresponder:

A mail utility that automatically sends a reply to an e-mail message. Autoresponders are used to send back boilerplate information on a topic without having the requester do anything more than e-mail a particular address. They are also used to send a confirmation that the message has been received.

[roamingguy 300292]

This is what autoreply is for...

 

autoresponder:

A mail utility that automatically sends a reply to an e-mail message. Autoresponders are used to send back boilerplate information on a topic without having the requester do anything more than e-mail a particular address. They are also used to send a confirmation that the message has been received.

 

No disagreement Gabriella. But there are some touring ladies who can't personally reply to emails untill back home from touring. The autoreply does acknowledge the email sent, but the lady was unable to reply untill home. But by the same token, I read the lady's website first, including calendar and am able to see she is out of town. And in my case, I do plan my encounters way in advance, so it's not like I'm emailing today for a date tomorrow

RG