rocketjhj 100 Report post Posted December 10, 2011 So the problem is I like sex, but can't actually perform when the time is required and someone else is there. even if they are doing a great job trying to help things along. Not sure what to do... I'm 50 so maybe its my age. I always loved sex. Any advice might be helpful. Rocket Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Megan'sTouch 23875 Report post Posted December 10, 2011 What exactly do you need help with? What is your goal? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cat 262460 Report post Posted December 10, 2011 First and foremost, go see your doctor for a complete physical. It's exceedingly common at your age to have a drop in testosterone production with directly impacts performance. Hormonal imbalances affect every aspect of our physiology. Once you have eliminated any physical reasons for your particular challenge then you can start addressing it directly. cat 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rocketjhj 100 Report post Posted December 10, 2011 What exactly do you need help with? What is your goal? well I would like to be able to get an erection? It seems to be that the erection does not happen. I can't get it up so to speak. Additional Comments: First and foremost' date=' go see your doctor for a complete physical. It's exceedingly common at your age to have a drop in testosterone production with directly impacts performance. Hormonal imbalances affect every aspect of our physiology. Once you have eliminated any physical reasons for your particular challenge then you can start addressing it directly. [/size'] cat Thanks I have seen a doc and apparently the plumbing is fine.... ie there are know physical obstructions... although I'm not in as go condition as I was many years ago. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Megan'sTouch 23875 Report post Posted December 10, 2011 When did these problems surface? Could you get a second medical opinion? Do you think there are psychological reasons behind it (getting nervous, stress, etc.)? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mrgreen760 37785 Report post Posted December 10, 2011 If you wake up with morning wood, the equipment is in working order. At my annual physical I spoke to my Dtr about a sort of similair issue. It wasn't about the ability to achieve an erection it was about the strength and maintaining one. I'm 57. My tests results are normal, weight is undercontrol and I work out regularly. He offered a sample of Viagara, he perfers it as it will clear your system where some of the daily ones Cilalis doesn't and if you arrive at emerge in distress at our age the first thing they'll likely give you is nitro glycerin which could be fatal. I passed because I know the most effective aphrodisiac is my brain. I may need take advantage of modern science at some point but I'd rather not. Open communication with my dance partners has worked for me so far. Peace MG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
slurp 7020 Report post Posted December 10, 2011 If you haven't talked to your doc about "help" like Viagra, Cialis etc I would strongly urge you to do so. As long as the spirit is willing, things like medicines can help you get to your goal. Ask for a sample and see if it helps. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Butterfly Kisses 2301 Report post Posted December 11, 2011 Relax and go with the moment. Find a lady who understands you might not get a hard on. I have had times when I couldn't get hard, times when I got hard right away then it faded. Times while having intercourse where suddenly my erection turned semi hard. And sometimes when I am hard the whole time but can't cum. And I have cum when I was given a vigorous hand job but was soft the whole time. I also went for a testosterone check and found out I was way below where a man my age should be. Mthly testosterone injections cleared that up. Good Luck Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JuliasUndies 7288 Report post Posted December 11, 2011 Anxiety! Don't pressure yourself that much. My man has this happen to him..he can get so anxious over the act and what I'm expecting that he looses it so to speak, and there is no way I could ask him to get hard around someone else lol Clonazapam, lorazepam...great anti anxieties. The doctor will know what's best. Another very common mood killer is caffeine or salt intake, if you find it's harder to pee or pee more often and never feel like your empty, then this could be prostate related and it's common and easy to fix. Good luck!! Orr, come and see one of us, we can fix you up a stiffy in a jiffy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest f***nds4f** Report post Posted December 11, 2011 Testim 1% might help. Talk to your family doctor. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Crafty 305 Report post Posted December 11, 2011 For me, at times, stress it the main thing. To much on the brain makes it hard to unwind and enjoy the momment. Try clearing your schedule and mental to-do list and enjoy. The are more times than I can count that it was for this reason I could enjoy myself. No matter what I was it to. Taking time for yourself, to enjoy yourself, takes more than just a phone call. A little mental planning and a clear schedule can make all he difference. Good luck. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fortunateone 156618 Report post Posted December 11, 2011 If you are able to get an erection 'at home', then that covers that issue. If it is just in session, then there are a few options. The main one is stop thinking inside the box, and go only for hj and/or bj (but with a FS provider). This is someone that you are going to keep visiting a few times, you will be 'working your way towards" FS. If your first couple of visits are stress free of performance worries, as in if you aren't trying to do FS there is no need to worry about erection, you can relax and enjoy the process. Make sure who you choose is willing to provide GFE non-full service so that eventually she is going to be able to carry on when you are ready to try FS, plus you have all the GFE fun without the stress of performance in FS Also remind yourself that sps don't judge. It isn't that important to us how you cum as long as you do, so you don't need to be concerned about 'impressing' us with proficiency and/or stamina in FS. For myself I would rather that you were relaxed and cumming in a hj than stressed and anxioius and not cumming in FS attempts. i also find a lot of newcomers get more anxious when a condom is involved, i imagine it makes them think even more about what is about to happen. So going with hj only, no condom involved, eliminates that barrier to finishing as well. You don't even have to be fully erect to cum with hj, for example. Once you get comfortable with an sp, you will be able to start doing or trying FS. You may also want to choose an sp who does erotic massage to start sessions. When the mind and the body are relaxed, you are more likely to be ready for a more erotic encounter. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A****y E*e 6175 Report post Posted December 11, 2011 I haven't read it, but I have heard really great things about this book: http://www.amazon.ca/Coping-Erectile-Dysfunction-Regain-Confidence/dp/1572243864 Goes through all the possible causes and offers long-term plans. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
