Jump to content

It's the small stuff that really bugs me

Recommended Posts

Oy, if I had a nickel for every annoying event in life, I would...well, I'd have a crap load of nickels.

 

Everyday life brings individual challenges. Mine always seem to occur early morning...namely, when I'm sitting on the john. And it always seems to involve bathroom paper. The roles I get are the 2-ply econo packs from Costco. The double role is great, but getting them started is a royal PAIN in the toes.

 

The TP manufacturer leaves a little slip of paper to grip to get things going. But the glue, or the pressure strip they use to keep everything from unraveling is just too strong. So, I tenderly grasp the lead paper and begin to tear in the hopes things will go well. This morning, it did not go well. I spent a good 10 minutes frigging with the toilet paper role. Just sitting there got me thinking that I could be doing so many other useful things. I could get a 2nd cup of coffee; or get some breakfast; or feed the dog; just anything but sitting in this god foresaken lonely bathroom frigging with the stupidest thing in the world - a toilet paper role is controlling my life!

 

Got the TP role started (or so I believed)...only to discover, I only got one ply to unravel. The 2nd ply was separated, therefore leaving a substantially inadequate 1 ply TP section in my dumb-ass hands. Totally unacceptable. You know what happens when you use 1 ply toilet paper. It's not a happy experience.

 

In frustration, I unraveled a good 25 feet of paper before the 2 plys bonded and I was left with something useful. Great, now I discovered I installed the roll on the spindle incorrectly. Believe it or not, there is a correct way to install a toilet paper role. The correct way of course is to have the roll unravel from the bottom. Gravity helps feed the paper downward. To those who prefer to have their TP unravel from the top - I have the sad duty to inform you that you are silly.

 

Now liberated from the bathroom, I had only to worry about loading the dishwasher...the correct way.

 

Do you think I worry too much?

  • Like 4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest S**a*Q

Yes.

 

Lol! I would have just pinched the edge of the toilet paper roll, grabbing between thumb and forefinger, the first 10-50 "rolls" of paper, then ripped it right across so that I can get to the toilet paper that works. :D

 

No stress, none ever, I always take the easy way out. ;)

 

Don't sweat the petty stuff, always pet the sweaty stuff. :P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest ****ven

LMAO

 

this is not what I expected this thread to be about but ohhhhh man jabba baby do I ever know what your talking about.

 

Not only does TP make me mental, but I only ever buy one specific brand:

 

Charmin and it has to be the double rolls.

 

Also my lovely co-ed roommates are slobs and never ever ever ever change the rolls when they finish them so I have sex on their beds in revenge!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
The correct way of course is to have the roll unravel from the bottom.

 

Jabba, you have it all wrong! Maybe if you put your TP on the proper way, you wouldn't get so aggravated by such silly things. So, have it unroll from over the top, take a deep breath and relax. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
LMAO

 

Also my lovely co-ed roommates are slobs and never ever ever ever change the rolls when they finish them so I have sex on their beds in revenge!

 

Revenge is indeed a dish best served cold and something to be slowly savoured.

Hide the toilet paper under your bed and enjoy the screams.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I believe you will find most hotels set up the TP over, not under. And the real fancy ones fold a nice little diamond shape.

 

The heavy glue problem seems to be a recent phenomenom or maybe it is just me getting older.

It is a well known fact that John Wayne kept a Bowie kife handy for starting toilet paper rolls and movie rolls. And dinner rolls.

 

600px-Alamo-BowieKnife-1.jpg

 

toilet_paper_correct_direction-thumb.gif

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There are may things I won't scrimp on.. toilet paper and kleenex (where's antlerman when you need him?) are a couple. 3 ply kleenex and cashmere toilet paper. Gotta be both soft and strong and no fuss!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Has anyone noticed that over the years, "they" are putting less sheets per roll so you end up running out faster. And the double rolls aren't really double at all, then.

 

It's a conspiracy to make us have to buy more toilet paper.

 

Either that, or I am peeing way more in my old age.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
There are may things I won't scrimp on.. toilet paper and kleenex (where's antlerman when you need him?) are a couple. 3 ply kleenex and cashmere toilet paper. Gotta be both soft and strong and no fuss!

 

I have always said TP and tissue are NOT luxuries, they are necessities! And I've often wondered what really really really uber rich people use?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest W***ledi*Time
Has anyone noticed that over the years, "they" are putting less sheets per roll ... It's a conspiracy to make us have to buy more toilet paper.

 

Either that, or I am peeing way more in my old age.

 

Luckily, there is a simultaneous conspiracy to put less Orange Juice in the carton ... so the OJ/TP liquid equilibrium is maintained. As they say in the sanitation business: "it all evens out in the end".

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My theory on the TP is that the rolls are smaller to create more recyclable waste. Same with packaging. I hate things that are packaged in plastic, then in cardboard and then in plastic again.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Nice image RG.. I have to admit I was (was?) quite the brat when I was younger and tp'd many a house.. but have yet to TP a person. Would you like that RG?

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

when you have a septic tank you can't use the soft TP you have to use the 220 grit(but you have to worry about leaveing anything behind after useing it) and it cost almost as much as the cushy stuff not that sucks

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Has anyone noticed that over the years, "they" are putting less sheets per roll so you end up running out faster. And the double rolls aren't really double at all, then.

 

It may just be the relentless march towards softer, thicker and more luxurious paper means you can't get as much on a roll. And the rolls have to stay the same size so they continue to fit the holders...

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Does anyone remember the commercial TP dispensers that gave you one folded sheet at a time? The paper was really hard & difficult to use. Plus, you had to use a whole bunch of them to get adequate coverage.

 

If the dispenser was getting close to empty, the sheets wouldn't dispense easily and you had to dig inside the dispenser to get the TP. Sometimes, the TP would just drop out of the dispenser onto the floor.

 

Almost as bad as those cubicles that made you pay a dime or quarter just to get into the cubicle. Talk about inhumanity.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh the things that one learns from being a CERB member!

 

I am still pretty new to the maintain a house by myself thing, and shopping for toilet paper, paper towels, dish detergent, high performance laundry soap, and the like has been an adventure. Maybe I have to start a thread on each of those too? :)

 

Who knew! I sure as heck didn't!

 

But hey, need screwing, oops I mean screws, or something at Canadian Tire, and I am your man.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My tight ass father used to buy the cheapest 2 ply toilet paper there was and allowed me two squares to do my business with. Lol. NOW I buy the thickest, most ply paper I can find. Soft on the bum :D. Just like tires ... The more plys the better !!

Posted via Mobile Device

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Almost as bad as those cubicles that made you pay a dime or quarter just to get into the cubicle. Talk about inhumanity.

 

Yes, that reminds of the old rhyme:

 

Here I sit, broken hearted.

Paid a dime and only farted.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That honesty no longer seems to be the best policy. It makes me angry when someone does something wrong and you do the right thing only to have another mad at you for saying anything (especially when it was all anonymous). Anyhow, makes no sense but I feel better now :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
That honesty no longer seems to be the best policy. It makes me angry when someone does something wrong and you do the right thing only to have another mad at you for saying anything (especially when it was all anonymous). Anyhow, makes no sense but I feel better now :)

 

It still is and always should be the best policy Meg ! You should always do what you feel is the right thing. 99% of the time I use the honesty policy....the other 1% I hobby and enjoy life ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
That honesty no longer seems to be the best policy. It makes me angry when someone does something wrong and you do the right thing only to have another mad at you for saying anything (especially when it was all anonymous). Anyhow, makes no sense but I feel better now :)

 

I am with Lee on this one Meg. Personal honesty is virtually always the preferable course, and even when it brings unintended and oft-times unfair anger or consequences, honesty is the best policy.

 

It does hurt though when it brings those feelings, as we have all experienced them.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sorry folks, but I'm confused.

What does honesty have to do with a discussion about toilet paper?...but, just to go with the flow, I honestly enjoy a good soft paper product. Maybe I'll step up to try the Charmin.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, please sign in.
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...