Guest Report post Posted June 3, 2012 This is something , as an SP , that I am NOT comfortable with. There have been plenty of hobbyists requesting them , and I politely let them know it is something I am not comfortable with. MOST CASES , the hobbyist will accept my decision and they decide from there whether their comfortable meeting me with or without being provided with a face photos. But recently , today honestly, a hobbyist messaged me and told me if I did not post a face photo or email him one , it meant I had something to hide and I was told he was going to put a negative review of me on this site if I did not send him what he requested... I dont appreciate this very much and am looking for feedback as to which way I should reply , and how other hobbyists / SP's feel about face photos. I have noticed there are several SP's in my area alone , who advertise with face photos and also I know PLENTY others post ads and are successful without offering face photos. Either way works , I just figure on this site , people should respect boundaries, etc. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billybob 20128 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 If he is a member here you should probably report him to the mod. You have the right to share as much or as little information that you feel comfortable doing, anyone not respecting that doesn't belong here. 15 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DukeSSk 3430 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 But recently , today honestly, a hobbyist messaged me and told me if I did not post a face photo or email him one , it meant I had something to hide and I was told he was going to put a negative review of me on this site if I did not send him what he requested... Hmm.., I doubt the website's admins & mods would be impressed with this threat. Quite frankly, I wouldn't ask for a face pic. I'll leave that decision to the SP. I hope this ends well. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Athos 108589 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 Threatening something like this is simply atrocious behaviour. The person also clearly doesn't know much about CERB as negative reviews are not permitted. If he posts something, on this board or any other, simply ask the moderators to remove it. Just explain what he threatened and the fact that you've never seen the person. Porthos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
drlove 37204 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 Don't feel pressured into doing anything you are not comfortable with. Remember, it's YOUR body and YOUR choice - it always is, regardless of what anyone else tries to tell you. As for the veiled threats, I suggest you contact Mod so he can put the offending party in their place. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BarrhavenWoody 10776 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 I agree with the others. Report him to the MOD. Threatening behaviour should not be tolerated. We don't need jerks like that on this site. Destiny, post whatever pics you are comfortable with. If a hobbyist doesn't like what he sees, he can go somewhere else. Although from what I've seen, you look fantastic! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Winnipegcub 21293 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 Destiny, threatening is threatening and shouldn't be tolerated in any form. The gentlemen of CERB accept that women will post their ads the way they want to represent themselves PERIOD! A POLITE request for a picture can be understood but in NO WAY should any member be threatening with the suggestion of a negative review. I suspect you may have already made up your mind to not see this guy but do not accept this behaviour in any form. In fact, others like me will have more admiration for your strenth and conviction. Stand firm. XO Cub Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest W***ledi*Time Report post Posted June 3, 2012 Don't worry, it's not only grossly inappropriate, but it's also an empty threat, since Cerb doesn't accept negative comments about providers. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted June 3, 2012 thanks everyone , i knew it wasnt something that was acceptable on this site which is why i was really disturbed when the member threatened me .. no matter what amount of pressure someone wants to put on , i do not do things out of my comfort zone and someone who tried to pressure me over an email is someone i definitely wouldnt see in person , cuz who knows what else the person could try to pressure me into :/ thanks again tho , to all the positive , friendly members. i appreciate the advice from all of you ! ;) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lexy Grace 103697 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 This is something , as an SP , that I am NOT comfortable with. There have been plenty of hobbyists requesting them , and I politely let them know it is something I am not comfortable with. MOST CASES , the hobbyist will accept my decision and they decide from there whether their comfortable meeting me with or without being provided with a face photos. But recently , today honestly, a hobbyist messaged me and told me if I did not post a face photo or email him one , it meant I had something to hide and I was told he was going to put a negative review of me on this site if I did not send him what he requested... I dont appreciate this very much and am looking for feedback as to which way I should reply , and how other hobbyists / SP's feel about face photos. I have noticed there are several SP's in my area alone , who advertise with face photos and also I know PLENTY others post ads and are successful without offering face photos. Either way works , I just figure on this site , people should respect boundaries, etc. IMHO I would hit that little report button in that PM. I use to show my face and wish that I could but my privacy was compromised and this is a private and discrete business for me as it is for most hobbyist and we should be given the same right to respect, discretion and privacy. I have a huge family here and all over and my business and what I do is just that, my business. My description of myself is 100% accurate and if that is not good enough than I would politely tell someone to seek out another lady. I agree with you that boundaries should and are to be respected. What would happen if every lady started requesting a face picture of every hobbyist, that certainly would not go over well with the hobbyist. CERB is a positive SP friendly recommendation board and no negative "reviews" would be posted here, so you have no worries about that empty threat. Some people will try many tactics that are mean, rude and unethical. Feel free to send me a PM to discuss this because this is so not right for anyone to make such remarks or threats. All my Love and Support, Lexy 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted June 3, 2012 IMHO I would hit that little report button in that PM. I use to show my face and wish that I could but my privacy was compromised and this is a private and discrete business for me as it is for most hobbyist and we should be given the same right to respect, discretion and privacy. I have a huge family here and all over and my business and what I do is just that, my business. My description of myself is 100% accurate and if that is not good enough than I would politely tell someone to seek out another lady. I agree with you that boundaries should and are to be respected. What would happen if every lady started requesting a face picture of every hobbyist, that certainly would not go over well with the hobbyist. CERB is a positive SP friendly recommendation board and no negative "reviews" would be posted here, so you have no worries about that empty threat. Some people will try many tactics that are mean, rude and unethical. Feel free to send me a PM to discuss this because this is so not right for anyone to make such remarks or threats. All my Love and Support, Lexy thank you Lexy , i told him if he needed a face photo to be the final decision maker for the appointment then he could go see someone else , as there are sp's in the hrm who have their faces on their profile .. my issue is like yours aswell , scotia is small and i know waaaaay too many people than to have my face floating on the internet tied to this end of my personal business , thanks for the support girl and i will def PM u later on :) xoxo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SamanthaEvans 166766 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 The decision to show one's face in photos is something everyone agonizes over. No matter what a companion's decision, she has excellent reasons for making it. It would be very difficult to be successful in this industry if a lady isn't at least very pretty; her face matters more than her body in this respect. Men who contact us, insisting on full face photos, "more skin" or pictures of particular body parts are rarely serious potential clients. They tend to be photo collectors, at best. At worst, they're likely to be dangerous--inclined to attempt blackmail or to expose us in our communities. This fellow is already using blackmail tactics in his threat to write a bad review if he doesn't get what he wants. Please report him, Destiny. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
backrubman 64800 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 ...But recently , today honestly, a hobbyist messaged me and told me if I did not post a face photo or email him one , it meant I had something to hide and I was told he was going to put a negative review of me on this site if I did not send him what he requested... WTF?!!?? Well you said "this site" and CERB doesn't allow negative reviews so that's a sure way for him to get his membership swiftly suspended or more likely cancelled and become unwelcome to ever return. That said, this kind of behavior is completely inexcusable. He is obviously unworthy of any further thought or consideration on your part. If he bad mouths you on any other board I am sure there is some recourse available there also. My guess is he will not be around here much longer and probably it will have nothing to do with you or this incident. We see complete jerks come and go (forcefully) pretty quickly. Any worthy client understands and respects your need for privacy. If he really is shallow enough to care that much about a pretty face then why not invite you to a paid lunch date first? I always do this when practical of course in my case it has absolutely nothing to do with the ladies outward appearance, I simply want to know and trust her and find it makes for a better outcome in the end, but even much more important I want to give her the chance to get to know me :) I'm shocked at this. What you wonderful ladies have to put up with sometimes amazes me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
1963Kennedy 10698 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 Yes, report him. You may discuss further in SP only area. I'm with you 100%. My only comment might be to show your hair with your face turned aside and hidden. I'm a sucker for beautiful hair. However, in retrospect, that may give too much away. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shelly Lane 13856 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 Hi sweetie, Please dont fall for this attemp at blackmail. I too have been told from members here that if I was worth while I would post face shoots or send them all over upon request! I too have to be very discret and WONT do it! besides he cant post anything neg here anyway! Tell him to add a face picture to his public profile to prove his worthyness!!! Good luck, xo 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Boomer 33202 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 By all means you report the incident to the mod, although he is no doubt aware of whats happening in this thread. I'm no sure if it was by email or pm so I would not delete the the offending message as mod might want to see it so there can be no understanding if he decides to take action against the offending member. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest ****ven Report post Posted June 3, 2012 This kind of behavior is not acceptable. It is your choice as to what photos you release. Period! Don't waste time feeling threatened by this kind of thing, and just report, immediately. As well negative reviews are not allowed. Let's not forget the if you don't have anything nice to say then don't say anything at all policy. :) Hope you aren't still bothered about this but remember your images are your personal property so release what you feel comfortable with. Kisses Sami Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rassilon 982 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 Destiny, it sounds like you handled it very well. You were polite and straight forward in the reply and you seeked help/helped others by warning everyone with your posting. I know it has been said already, but it bears saying again, if a service provider chooses to post a photo of her face then she can, but it is completely logical and understandable if she does not. Being surrounded by photographers, including a full time professional I have stupid thoughts in my head about your photos regarding the lighting, however for the most part I just went "Wow". That shot with partial exposure of your lips is terrfic. It is original and despite not being able to see your face something about just wows a guy and makes one think "She has to be telling the truth about how being that attractive." Even though one does not know for sure, the image just makes you think that way. When a picture generates a reaction beyond its contents you have a great photo. It is one thing to just say "I will choose to see service providers who post face photos." Sure, whatever. It is a whole other thing to make threats to get one. Definitely name names behind the scenes with the mod and perhaps tell a few SPs with access to the SPs only area. Someone who behaves like that has the potential to someone you don't want to see. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted June 3, 2012 I didnt get around to making the report to mod , but it has been brought to my attention that this harassing profile is under review , so there are many more possibilities behind this whole incident , truthfully i may never know ... It is quite possible he tried this on someone else , Im not familiar with this site yet which is why I love the fact everyone is so supportive with my issue :) now I see why Cerb is classified as a COMMUNITY , thanks to all Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted June 3, 2012 One of the cardinal rules of the SP/Client relationship, you always respect the lady's boundaries If he has no respect for your boundary of no face pics now, demanded with the threat of blackmail, what other boundaries will he push should you two ever meet, and what would he threaten to achieve them. And whatever you do, don't book an encounter with him, no amount of money is worth it Likely he isn't even serious about an encounter, just wants a picture to gratify himself Don't worry about negative reviews, they don't fly well here, well they don't fly at all here Like others have said, report this to Mod, he'll look after it. And I don't know the protocol for joining, being a gentleman, not a lady, but if you can report this on the SP Only Section you should do so, to warn other ladies. Good luck RG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fortunateone 156618 Report post Posted June 4, 2012 Picture collectors are notorious. And what is sad is that some new sps will actually reply with them, then wonder what they did wrong when that guy still doesn't make an appt. Stuff on the internet is there for EVER. Sending more revealing pics thru email is always a mistake. You don't ever know who is really at the other end of that email. Your boss. Your neighbour tryiing to verify, is that really an sp next door. Oh, yeah, it is. Your brother. Your competition, who will then plaster the face pics all over the internet with slanderous statements. and more. If you show face pics in your ads, you have taken control of them. If you send them anonymously to someone anonymous, you don't really know what they will do with them. Before the internet ads, no one really had pictures to go by. No sps used them, no clients expected them. Then one pic showed in one ad. That was great, until the next ad had 3, so guy goes back to ad #1 and demands more pics. Then websites have multiple picture galleries. So guy goes back to ad #2 and demands more pics. And then the galleries weren't enough, so now we have to use face pics. Then face pics aren't enough, and now sps have to either have videos in ads or on their site, or allow webcam chat showing the face, OR NOW they have to accept the request to film the session or the client taking pics. I just tell guys who ask for more pics that at my age and stats in my ad, if the person is relying on pics to make their decision, to find someone else. I am never interested in seeing anyone who is only interested in that, and not the tone of my ads, and the sound of my voice, and the description of what I provide. I agree with Samantha that I think in order to be able to do this service for more than a minute, the sp/mpa are attractive. Maybe that sp is not that particular client's 'type", but even he would normally admit that definitely by societal standards, the majority of sps are above average in looks facially at least. 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Phaedrus 209521 Report post Posted June 4, 2012 I didnt get around to making the report to mod , but it has been brought to my attention that this harassing profile is under review , so there are many more possibilities behind this whole incident , truthfully i may never know ... It is quite possible he tried this on someone else , Im not familiar with this site yet which is why I love the fact everyone is so supportive with my issue :) now I see why Cerb is classified as a COMMUNITY , thanks to all It's entirely possible that he's tried this on a lot of people. Let Mod know about it anyway, even if the account is already under review (or suspended)... the more information that the people who need it (Mod, SPs) have about people like this, the easier it is to freeze them out. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SexxxyRebecca 57989 Report post Posted June 4, 2012 This is something , as an SP , that I am NOT comfortable with. There have been plenty of hobbyists requesting them , and I politely let them know it is something I am not comfortable with. MOST CASES , the hobbyist will accept my decision and they decide from there whether their comfortable meeting me with or without being provided with a face photos. But recently , today honestly, a hobbyist messaged me and told me if I did not post a face photo or email him one , it meant I had something to hide and I was told he was going to put a negative review of me on this site if I did not send him what he requested... I dont appreciate this very much and am looking for feedback as to which way I should reply , and how other hobbyists / SP's feel about face photos. I have noticed there are several SP's in my area alone , who advertise with face photos and also I know PLENTY others post ads and are successful without offering face photos. Either way works , I just figure on this site , people should respect boundaries, etc. Hi, Im really sorry it happens to you. I cant really add more than what being said in this thread, but I would report the user and dont even answer to him. Im a member of CERB for almost a year and a half and never show my face picture. Like you, I dont feel comfortable with that and dont want to jeopardize with my privacy. Yes, Ive been asked several time to send a picture of my face. The answer was always the same: No sorry. In general, people were understanding of my decision. If they were insisting, I was just ignored them and ask them to look for somebody else. I have nothing to hide and even if I never show my face pic before an appointment, my buissness is going pretty good. I dont think that: "a girl who doesnt show is face" has less buissness than others or has something to hide. Stick with what your comfortable. Ignore & reporte him. Its like forcing a girl to do something she's not comfortable with sexually. That guy doesnt deserve to be member here. Period. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nicolette Vaughn 294340 Report post Posted June 4, 2012 But recently , today honestly, a hobbyist messaged me and told me if I did not post a face photo or email him one , it meant I had something to hide and I was told he was going to put a negative review of me on this site if I did not send him what he requested... I dont appreciate this very much and am looking for feedback as to which way I should reply , and how other hobbyists / SP's feel about face photos. I have noticed there are several SP's in my area alone , who advertise with face photos and also I know PLENTY others post ads and are successful without offering face photos. Either way works , I just figure on this site , people should respect boundaries, etc. Yeah, he doesn't like it? Tell him to blow it out his dittybag! Especially when threatening a bad review! Tell him to go ahead because this isn't a review site, it's a recommendation site. And he could even go to the other board but over 50% of escorts DON'T show their faces so this is par for the course in this business. Hobbyists know that most times they won't get to see an SP's face before meeting. Don't let anyone EVER bully you or make you go outside your comfort zone. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thesugarman 272 Report post Posted June 4, 2012 i agree with Angela Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites