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(mis)understanding introverts

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Glad you bumped this thread mister t, interesting article, and sums me up perfectly. Especially the line "the only thing introverts hate more than talking about themselves is repeating themselves".

 

In truth, almost nothing pisses me off more than repeating myself. I take great offense to it actually. Its like "I hardly ever talk, so the least you can do when I do say something is listen. Especially if you've asked me a question."

 

I believe there is a special place in hell waiting for anyone who asks me a question then doesn't have the common courtesy to pay attention to me when I answer them :)

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I guess I'd be called an introvert, in the outside world. Not that I'm shy, but I have a few close people...friends, that I trust and would open up with. Other people, I'm more guarded and cautious about what I reveal about myself. People might call that shy, me just guarded.

In this lifestyle, when seeing a lady, most of the time, even on a first date I am pretty open. If the lady trusts me enough to be intimate with me I certainly trust her to be open with her. So if I have an encounter with a lady and I am open with her, I am getting a good vibe and trust you

But really all in all, I'm wouldn't say I'm so much an introvert as a person who is selective about who I share parts of my life about and who I want sharing parts of their life with me, if that comes out right

RG

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For me, what I do now is perfect. It's the meeting of two (or three) people intimately and enjoyably and I find more time than not I am energized by it not depleted. I've had jobs in the past where my favorite parts were when I could sneak off to silence for a little bit and make everyone go away. Too many, too much.

 

How many would ever think to say sex workers are introverted!

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Really great article, Nathalie! :) Thank you so much for sharing! (I know this is an old thread, but it seems to have gotten some new life!)

 

Like others, I was also able to relate to the explanations written. A few years ago, I thought it was weird to want to be alone so often, but now I am comfortable with just doing what feels right. I have traced part of this back to growing up as an only child. I had friends, but it's not the same as having other siblings in the house at all times. I figure that I became accustomed to often being alone and having my own privacy, finding ways to entertain myself, and learning to be comfortable with a calm and relaxed atmosphere. I've never felt that I need people around all the time to be happy, and in fact, I feel quite the opposite. And when there is people around, it doesn't have to be constant interaction.

 

Question to all the introvert SPs. Has this profession helped or made any difference, or has no effect with being an introvert?

 

When I reflect on being an SP, and consider my personality and lifestyle, it just really all fits together. I do like people, but in a quiet, private setting, and for a short while. I get my necessary physical human contact, my intimate needs are met, I have enough social time with others, yet it's in the perfect sized small doses. And then I get my adequate time to myself :) For me, it is a perfect balance.

 

I wonder if there is also some sort of connection with introverts and animals. It seems logical that the company and presence of an animal would often be preferred by an introvert, as opposed to the company of another person. I feel that way, at least. I adore the companionship of my dog and cats, in a way that another person could never substitute.

Edited by Sweet Emily J
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Guest webothscore

 

I wonder if there is also some sort of connection with introverts and animals. It seems logical that the company and presence of an animal would often be preferred by an introvert, as opposed to the company of another person. I feel that way, at least. I adore the companionship of my dog and cats, in a way that another person could never substitute.

 

I am sure to some degree this makes sense. I am an extrovert and super social, and while I think some animals are really cool, I don't think I could have a pet that deserves proper attention. I would rather not have pet than have one and only feed and play with it when it fits my schedule.

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Guest realnicehat

 

I wonder if there is also some sort of connection with introverts and animals. It seems logical that the company and presence of an animal would often be preferred by an introvert, as opposed to the company of another person. I feel that way, at least. I adore the companionship of my dog and cats, in a way that another person could never substitute.

 

Hmmmm......I am an introvert. I have a dog. I loved being locked in a room with You for a couple of hours but I've only done it once. Your theory seems sound but I think more research is in order ;)

 

Based on what I've seen at the dog park I think you are right about introverts and pets. It is riddled with shy quiet types, each trying to find their own corner, hoping to exercise their pet after a long workday without any more human contact than they have to......

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I have an adult son who has Asperger's Syndrome which makes him very much of the "introverted loner" type. I found what this article said very much "on the money".

As a sidebar, the first thing my son bought when he moved out on his own was a dog. I worried about his ability to relate to the animal and care for it but in hindsight, it is probably the best thing he ever did, for at the dog park he fits right in. He doesn't seem any more socially awkward than the others there. The dog has given a very introverted young man a connection to the rest of society. So I certainly concur with introverts and pets comments previously made.

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I am definitely an introvert and need a lot of time by myself. I feel calm and am able to then take on any tasks at hand</p>

While I can be social and outgoing, I feel as though I can be a chameleon sometimes.

 

 

It's funny because I once had some call me an attention w one time and I just laughed because this was someone who needed to be the centre of attention at all times and had to deflect and accuse me of that because they were probably jealous or envious for whatever reason. Once I realized they had narcissistic qualities, it all made sense. They were deflecting it onto me.

 

I once remember being in my 20's and it was a time when I had more of the spinner body type happening and felt like I was "too out there". I didn't like the attention and was with my sister downtown parked in front of a outdoor patio where all these young guys were sitting drinking. We sat in my car until they left because we didn't want to walk past them. I never liked that sort of attention.

 

I can be very unassuming when I want to be and I joke to people close to me that I can make myself invisible. I was very shy as a child but being in this business has brought me out of my shell but I still need my solitude. I can be outgoing when I need to be and shut it off when I want to. Its weird but if I really asked myself, I'm definitely an introvert. </p>

 

I dont have a lot of friends, I don't go out a lot and keep to myself but I am never bored. Lol.

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I have always considered myself to be somewhat introverted however a lot of people who know me from my work or from community activity see as being extroverted.

 

For things that I care strongly about or for my work world where I have 30+ years of experience I am easily able to quickly step up and seem outgoing and outspoken.

 

The perception of a lot of people is that introverts are thinkers not doers and that they are not the person up front leading the issue... nothing could be further from the truth... yes introverts are thinkers but after taking the time needed to formulate their thoughts on an Issue they can be as passionate and outspoken a leader as anyone.

 

An introvert might not like being the Centre of attention but put into that role they can deliver.

 

So I don't know maybe I am an introvert or an extrovert or somewhere in between

 

Just my Opinion

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The perception of a lot of people is that introverts are thinkers not doers and that they are not the person up front leading the issue... nothing could be further from the truth... yes introverts are thinkers but after taking the time needed to formulate their thoughts on an Issue they can be as passionate and outspoken a leader as anyone.

 

I agree with you 100 percent. I am an introvert and I'm the happiest when I'm doing things alone, or with others. Anything active makes me happy. I'm always trying to get people to come to the gym, or active events because that is my happy place. Just like being an introvert is part of who I am, so is being a doer.

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Question to all the introvert SPs. Has this profession helped or made any difference, or has no effect with being an introvert?

 

I am in introvert. And the only thing I don't like about this thread is that there seems to be an underlying idea that there is something wrong with being introverted.

 

Has this profession helped? With what? Being an introvert? Like it's a bad thing and I require help to not be introverted? I hope I've completely misunderstood the post.

 

Because there is absolutely nothing wrong with being introverted. I personally love my alone time! It's the best thing in the world. But that doesn't mean I don't like people or never leave the house or am not super ridiculously busy in my life. It just means that instead of waking up and running downstairs to see my family (I'm home for xmas), I am instead writing this, and delaying the chaos because regardless of if I go down now, or in another 30 minutes, we'll have the same interaction and I am not missing anything other than small talk.

 

Also, can you imagine the whole world being extroverts?! Nothing would ever get done because there would be too much chatting going on! Ha. (See how I've generalized extroverts ;-))

 

Anyhow, introverts don't need help to not be introverted. And introversion does not mean I am shy, or dislike people, or am anti-social and hide under a blanket in the corner, or that I want to live my entire life alone, or can't hold a conversation (though I do admit small talk is painful). Meaningless chatter we (I) find well... meaningless and I often tune out (sorry peeps). I love public speaking, the bigger the crowd the better. Small groups I prefer to hear what other people have to say rather than hear myself talking. Intimate gatherings I enjoy comparing points of view.

 

Introverts are independent and don't require people around us in order to function. That's it.

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I get your point about the perception that being an introvert is seen all to often as being a negative when the fact is that being introverted or extroverted for that matter has many positive and negative aspects. It really is all about knowing what your strengths are and what makes you tick.

 

Just my Opinion

 

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