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Well I must say Phantom that's a hell of a first post. You hit the nail on the head. Lets hope you don't wait another six years before you post again, I think you might have something to contribute.

 

A belated welcome.

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Nice bit of logic for your first post phantom. Try not to wait another half dozen years before the next one. Great to have your participation. Good to have some wisdom from the point of view of one who has been watching for so long. I'm sure you've seen a lot of issues come and go and have an interesting perspective as a result.

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Well written Mr Phantom

 

I also am like you and post very little. The way I look at it by not being invited is how can a person be invited to a social gathering if they don't know you. They won't offer you to come if they don't know you from a hole in the ground.

 

I remember a time when I was with friends at a party and this associate (Not someone I hang around with) was inviting people back to their place for a fire. I was not invited. Did I take offense? Heck no, as I didn't know him enough, and I would probably have done the same thing in his shoes.

 

I am sure that there will be more socials in the future. Be patient and as you post more (for those that do post) people will come to understand and know you.

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With respect to the upcoming social, the fact that only certain members were invited should not be taken as an affront by anyone. Quite simply, as many others have stated - in this type of venue, safety and discretion are paramount. I for one want all the ladies (and gents) to feel 100% comfortable in attending, as the success of this inaugural social depends on the attitude and actions of its attendees. I'd like the notion of future events to be entertained as well, but this will only occur if we walk away with fond memories of this one.

 

Furthermore, and somewhat unfortunately, the only way to gauge a member on the board is through participation. You may have been a hobbyist for some time with a stellar track record, but if you're new here with a relatively low post count, you're still an unknown quantity. Be that as it may, I realize that there are some out there who feel such a method of discernment is unjust. To those of you, I offer an analogy: First off, respect is earned, not freely given. I've been an active hobbyist for over twelve years, and have been a member of another board since 2001. Now, I joined Cerb in 2008. Would I have expected special treatment here just because I had arrived with a track record somewhere else? Certainly not. Instead, I began my journey at the bottom just like anyone else. I made a respectful first post, introduced myself and went from there. If one takes the time to contribute in a positive fashion, and shows respect to all, it will be reciprocated tenfold. That said, it just takes a bit of time. So, for those not attending, there will be another opportunity. As such, there really isn't a need for pettiness or a reason to feel slighted.

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This social is a learning experience for everyone and, although I have never planned to attend, I applaud the efforts of those now organizing and those who earlier tried to organize it.

 

Given that it is a learning experience, may I suggest one lesson to be learned? It is quite true that it is perfectly reasonable to limit invitations to people who are known quantities: however, there would have been far fewer hard feelings if the intention to do that had been clear from the start.

 

By my reading, every post about the social left the impression that it was open to all comers (subject to space limitations) up until the time some people were told they couldn't come because they weren't known. However reasonable that rule might be (and it is), it is easy to understand that someone refused an invitation to an apparently "open-to-all" event for a hitherto-unannounced reason might feel a bit put out.

 

I'm not casting blame here - I'm trying to reduce its casting. As I read Mrrnice2's post when he first mentioned the restriction, he realized that it was potentially controversial. I also don't fault him for not thinking of it sooner - it's a learning experience, no-one else had mentioned it, and he deserves credit for stepping in to the breach. But I also don't blame Polarice55 for feeling rejected - he was, after all, rejected - and his initial post reporting what had happened was not an intemperate one, simply one reporting the fact.

 

There are reasonable things to be said on both sides here. Let's focus on that, not on the areas of disagreement.

 

[edited to fix a name]

Edited by dread pirate roberts

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I had no idea I would touch off such a passionate debate. I have read most posts with great amusement. It's a party. Some are invited and some are not. There will be women and men. I really doubt anything illegal will occur. Nuff said

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