Advice

[DukeSSk 3430]

I'd suggest to your friend to take a breath and perhaps sign up to this website and look around and read.

 

I don't mean to come across as all-knowing and degrading, it's just that there's lots of rules to know and certain behaviours and precautions are expected.

 

Good place to start is New to this? Things you should know.

 

If time is of the essence for your friend, maybe going via an agency is the way to go. But then again, regarding the 1st time memories, a GFE with an independent may be the better option.

 

It's a long weekend, I'd assume lots of the ladies already have plans...

[Maverick 2873]

I think you should encourage your friend to make contact with an SP he wants to spend time with himself, instead of you arranging it for him. That way, he can talk with the SP about his experience and make sure it's a smooth and enjoyable session.

[EmilyRushton 253367]

From the companions side of things, there is nothing worse than someone setting their friend up with a companion.

 

You and him are different, with very different likes, dislikes, etc. Chemistry is key and setting this up for him makes the entire experience weird.

 

I'm not one to pry, but I don't see why it is such a mission for your friend to lose his virginity it is something that will happen when the time is right, putting pressure to have it happen with a paid companion may not be in the future a memory that he wants to reflect one. (plus how do you think he will feel when him and his wife years from now talk about their first times, I highly doubt he will be so forthcoming with I paid for it)

 

Have you thought about what if you arrange this encounter and it is a disaster? As well he wants to do this now, which really leave not a whole lot of time for research or time to establish any form of connection for something that should be great experience.

 

If he wants this, as it has been stated he needs to do this for himself and by himself. Sign up on the board, research and READ everything about being New to This....then make contact and book the encounter. Most important of all be upfront in a polite and respectable way to the lady he wishes it see as not all ladies see first timers. Lastly show up....

[Boomer 33202]

I think you should stay clear. This is a very personal event in a mans life and it's better to let him sort it out for himself. You might want to reassure him that there's no rush. I remember my first time and it came out of the blue at a most unexpected time and I was very lucky to have had the experience with quite a wonderful and understanding woman.

 

As already stated, if you do set him up and he has a disaster he's not going to thank you.

[tokan 16826]

To be honest I'm not sure if this is something that you really want to get into the middle of. As a friend I know your intentions are only the best but to be honest this really is something a person needs to sort out for himself. Having lost my virginity to a SP I can say with all honesty that I don't regret it and will always treasure the memory of our time together. At the same time though I had done my research, did a fair amount of soul searching, and contacted a particular sp I was interested in, albeit only the night before, to establish a connection.

 

If you want to point your friend in the right direction though, and give him your support that is an entirely different matter. But I think he really needs to figure out for himself, if he decides to go this route, who he wants to see and get in touch with her. And like Emily said be honest about his situation and be polite.

 

On another note sometimes I think we put to much pressure on ourselves for our first time. It is an important milestone in a person's life for sure but at the same time it doesn't always happen the way we expect it would. I feel fortunate in a lot of ways that I went the route I did as I couldn't have lost mine to a more wonderful lady. The one thing I definitely found though is it took a huge amount of pressure off my shoulders and I feel like now if I were to meet a woman I was interested in I could approach her feeling more comfortable with myself and not obsessing over sex.

 

So I guess what I'm saying is just make sure to tell your friend to think this through and be there for support whatever he decides to do.

[roamingguy 300292]

I do believe you have the best of intentions. And there is, no rational reason for it, pressure on guys to lose their virginity as soon as possible (at least back in my day there was)...like it's some flaw.

Yes, reassure him that there really is no pressure, it should be done when the time is right for him

But really, this isn't something you should set up. Your friend should, if he wishes to see a SP, arrange that himself. You could point him in the direction of CERB, and he should create his own profile on here. He can look at the ladies' profile, and see if there is a lady that interests him.

But he should most definitely do this himself, and tell the lady he is going to meet that he is a virgin, so she knows ahead of time.

One thing, if my experience losing my virginity is any example, my memory of my time with the girl (we were both teenagers) is fond. And it was unplanned out of the blue. Don't know if that is the case with everyone, but it's a fond memory for me

And your friend, if he enrolls on CERB he will get a wealth of information and advice from the community

RG

[JoyfulC 132299]

The best way for your friend to lose his virginity is with a young woman who is interested in him (maybe even in love with him) and the two of them can enjoy the adventure.

 

But I suspect your friend's true problem isn't virginity, but that he lacks the social skills to get to know eligible women, to play the field, and embark on relationships. His lack of confidence and his willingness to take risks and deal with rejection.

 

I have seen so very many times in my life than when young men start using SPs, it often results in being condemned to do so for the rest of their lives. It takes the edge off, sure, but it doesn't leave them much incentive to develop the social skills they need to unlock a life that includes healthy relationships with women. It becomes the crutch that cripples.

 

So many of the young men I've known like this over the years (and being a former skydiver, I spent a huge chunk of my life with a lot of young men) were their own worst enemies. Sometimes there would even be young women who showed interest in them, but they were so afraid of rejection that hey practically seemed to undermine themselves before anything got off the ground. Meanwhile, I'd see other young men with not half the looks and brains enjoying their pick of the eligible young women.

 

It's a confidence thing. Any man can choose to use the services of a professional, but it should be a choice. It sounds to me like, at present, your young friend doesn't have other options, and that's really his problem.

[whiteman 14028]

I'm going to disagree with the vast majority of the respondents in here, and say that you're doing right to help him out. Even though you say he's not shy, he appears to be shy around women, so having a buddy around to help with the arrangement part will be a great help. Your friend will obviously have the final decision about which girl he wants to go with, and it's likely that if you've known him long enough, you probably have a pretty good idea about what his type of woman is. If you're not shy to ask the girls those embarrassing questions that he's too embarrassed to ask, then you're a god-send. Wish I had a friend like you when I was growing up. Of course, in the end your friend will need to learn to talk to girls on his own, so he really shouldn't rely on you to do this for him all of the time.