Nathalie L 112512 Report post Posted July 26, 2012 (edited) I usually ask for a reference from another independent courtesan in the industry before confirming an appointment. I do this for safety reasons, but also because I trust the women here to look out for me and advocate on my behalf if necessary. Every-time I have asked for a reference, I have received prompt and lovely e-mails, PMs, and messages from the courtesan(s) in question and I've been delighted to hear my perspective client is a respectable gentlemen. Not all references are as beautiful, but that is what screening is all about. I'm very reluctant (in fact, I refuse) to accept references from agencies. More often then not, they don't have the necessary information I need to properly screen my potential patrons. I'm also reluctant because I don't know the woman personally, and often it isn't the provider in question that I will speak to but rather the agency owner/manager. I know not all agencies are like this, but if a service provider asks for a reference from an independent provider, there are usually very good reasons for this. Please respect our wishes and don't provide us with a reference from an agency. I'm not speaking on behalf of all independent ladies on CERB, but I know a lot of us feel similarly. Lately a lot of my perspective clients have offered agencies as references. There are other things we can do to screen and you simply need to ask. This is advice I would like to give to all the newbies out there :) the more experienced gents should know better ;) Fondly, Nat Edited July 26, 2012 by N*t****e L*f***** 7 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted July 26, 2012 I know, (mind you I don't use agencies) I use an independent lady for a reference when going through verification. Even should the day come that I see a lady from an agency I still would use an independent lady for a reference, with her prior permission of course. That lady knows you, and can attest to your character and behaviour as a client. An agency, and I emphasize it's my speculation here, well it's not the lady herself giving you the reference, it's the agency owner. And his/her criteria for a good client may not be the same as an independent lady RG 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pumpkin 649 Report post Posted July 26, 2012 I agree with RG...In fact I'll add that I love when I am asked to provide an independent reference, as other than the obvious security factor for her, it shows me the lady actually cares about who her clients are and that can have positive consequences such as being more at ease when first meeting... 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
emb3750 9398 Report post Posted July 26, 2012 I have no problem giving references...I just sometimes feel guilty that the reference I use might be annoyed that I'm spending my money on another SP, instead of her. Has happened to me a couple of times. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted July 26, 2012 I have no problem giving references...I just sometimes feel guilty that the reference I use might be annoyed that I'm spending my money on another SP, instead of her. Has happened to me a couple of times. That surprises me, the ladies I've met have been very happy to provide references. In fact the reference provider tells me, words to the effect, RG, you'll like her. All reference providers I've used want me to have a happy experience seeing ladies, not just them, but all ladies. But that's been my experience The ones who'd get annoyed or maybe petty jealousy, well fortunately I haven't experienced it. And a lady that possessive, for lack of a better word, well how would she feel if you commented to her about all the clients she has. One thing about this lifestyle, it is polyamorous, it isn't monogomous. But I'm getting sidetracked here. All ladies should realize providing references is good for all ladies. Yes the lady may provide a reference for you today for another lady (helps her safety) But next time around it may be another lady providing a reference for this lady who requests it, helping her safety. It should be considered a win-win by all RG 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nathalie L 112512 Report post Posted July 26, 2012 One thing about this lifestyle, it is polyamorous, it isn't monogomous. All ladies should realize providing references is good for all ladies. Yes the lady may provide a reference for you today for another lady (helps her safety) But next time around it may be another lady providing a reference for this lady who requests it, helping her safety. It should be considered a win-win by all RG I couldn't have said it better. It's definitely a polyamorous lifestyle and when safety is concerned, there is no room for jealously, or possessiveness. I'm sorry this had been your experience emd3750. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
emb3750 9398 Report post Posted July 26, 2012 (edited) I couldn't have said it better. It's definitely a polyamorous lifestyle and when safety is concerned, there is no room for jealously, or possessiveness. I'm sorry this had been your experience emd3750. Please don't get me wrong, I've been hobbying for quite some time. Most ladies have been very gracious to provides references. As I said, it only happened a couple of times, but left me more selective in who I choose to use as references now. Edited July 27, 2012 by emb3750 lol...spelling 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
EmilyRushton 253377 Report post Posted July 26, 2012 I have in the past accepted a reference from an agency on occasion (but it is only because I knew the owner) I will not accept anything except a reference from a reputable companion (as in paid advertising, website, board presence) My safety and well being and that of those I have previously met is way too important to me and that is why my screening policies have gotten stricter. As well with the bylaws in some cities, it is not worth risking anything for any amount of money. I am reference friendly and it saddens me when other ladies are not, as the gentleman will see who he wants with or with out your consent, you don't own the client and you should want nothing more than for him to be safe. 5 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites