A***** A***** 510 Report post Posted April 1, 2009 Have any good stories to tell? :?: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
antlerman 17064 Report post Posted April 1, 2009 dam that is a awful question to ask...I am a sex blooper all by myself I jerked off once and punched myself in the face.......explain a black eye that way Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
whatsup 11893 Report post Posted April 1, 2009 dam that is a awful question to ask...I am a sex blooper all by myself I jerked off once and punched myself in the face.......explain a black eye that way This is a classic, A.....man :mrgreen:. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
whatsup 11893 Report post Posted April 1, 2009 Still laughing. Actually it is starting to hurt. Cheers :lol: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A***** A***** 510 Report post Posted April 1, 2009 Well here's mine: While getting busy with an ex, the door opens. Girl asks where's so and so? Well so and so is on top of me and is butt naked While giving a blow job, I started to laugh. The people in the suite next door where saying something and I heard it. Doors that lead to the suite are less than sound proof. I have also laughed remembering what a friend said earlier in the day, and the worst times, giving a blow job I have had a client fall asleep during an apt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Apex2006 1071 Report post Posted April 2, 2009 This has happened to me a few times, I'm having sex in the missinary position and when I pulled out to blow my load, I shot her in the eye! She couldn't see for a while! Funny thing if that a few days later I was doing it againg and I tried to stand back and I still got her! So I bought her goggles for her birthday as a joke! Apex Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spud271 47779 Report post Posted April 2, 2009 Oh man, that is way too funny...can't stop laughing! dam that is a awful question to ask...I am a sex blooper all by myself I jerked off once and punched myself in the face.......explain a black eye that way Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Apex2006 1071 Report post Posted April 3, 2009 dam that is a awful question to ask...I am a sex blooper all by myself I jerked off once and punched myself in the face.......explain a black eye that way It was a high end lube! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NotchJohnson 214136 Report post Posted April 3, 2009 This is why they circumcise the babies so that when they get older and masturbate they can feel where the head is and stop.:handjob: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Apex2006 1071 Report post Posted April 3, 2009 I have jurked off so hard that my back cramped up! I was thinking of Spanking Emma and got a little out of control! Apex Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emma Alexandra 123368 Report post Posted April 3, 2009 I have jurked off so hard that my back cramped up! I was thinking of Spanking Emma and got a little out of control! Apex did you fall off the bed this time?lmao Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Apex2006 1071 Report post Posted April 3, 2009 did you fall off the bed this time?lmao Look who's talking! Apex! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Apex2006 1071 Report post Posted April 3, 2009 One time I was having sex with a good freind of mine and she had a bed that was higher then normal! Kind of hot by the way! Any way, I guess I was going a little to hrad for her to handel and she fell off the bed! HMMMMMMM! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emma Alexandra 123368 Report post Posted April 3, 2009 One time I was having sex with a good freind of mine and she had a bed that was higher then normal! Kind of hot by the way! Any way, I guess I was going a little to hrad for her to handel and she fell off the bed! HMMMMMMM! i wont mention someone {Apex} almost buring his ass on candles....lmao not once but twice...rotflmao Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Apex2006 1071 Report post Posted April 3, 2009 i wont mention someone {Apex} almost buring his ass on candles....lmao not once but twice...rotflmao It's on now! I'm going to get ya! and when I do you can kiss my FAT ASS! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
antlerman 17064 Report post Posted April 3, 2009 i wont mention someone {Apex} almost buring his ass on candles....lmao not once but twice...rotflmao So he did a Michael Jackson impression using his ass instead of his head....hahahhaha.....but the smell of burnt hair...gross!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Apex2006 1071 Report post Posted April 3, 2009 So he did a Michael Jackson impression using his ass instead of his head....hahahhaha.....but the smell of burnt hair...gross!!! Is my face red? lol Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spud271 47779 Report post Posted April 3, 2009 I once broke two bones in my hand...and not from masturbating! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thetiminator 100 Report post Posted April 3, 2009 Wow. Same hand? I once broke two bones in my hand...and not from masturbating! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SamanthaEvans 166767 Report post Posted April 3, 2009 Once upon a time, when I was about 20, I used a diaphragm for contraception. Being oh-so-cool and casual, I was demonstrating how it worked for a newish partner. I lay back on his bed and put the gel into the diaphragm. When I squeezed the sides of the thing together and got ready to insert it, it went flying out of my hand, across the room, splattered against the wall and fell down behind a heavy dresser. It was an amazing flight--I've never seen one do that since then. The guy was beside himself, laughing so hard. Of course, I just got mad... No happy ending that night! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spud271 47779 Report post Posted April 4, 2009 Same hand, fortunately it was my right hand...I'm a lefty! Wow. Same hand? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest i***k*** Report post Posted April 4, 2009 i wont mention someone {Apex} almost buring his ass on candles....lmao not once but twice...rotflmao How in hell does a guy burn his ass on candles? LOL Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spud271 47779 Report post Posted April 4, 2009 HAHAHA Now that's funny! Apex appears to be a total clutz. i wont mention someone {Apex} almost buring his ass on candles....lmao not once but twice...rotflmao Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thetiminator 100 Report post Posted April 4, 2009 Haven't had any, but want to make some. Hmm, now what can I do while doing it that could be a blooper? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emma Alexandra 123368 Report post Posted April 4, 2009 HAHAHA Now that's funny! Apex appears to be a total clutz. sure who's worse Apex or this guys http://cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=4263&highlight=fireman&page=2 at least with Apex the worst could have been buring his hairy ass...lol Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
