what not to ask an sp?

[buggernot 588]

I like a girl that discreetly advertises and doesn't punch me in like a time clock. Ads like "I'm working from 7am until 11pm today and I have one opening left at 3pm" just turn me right off. They make me feel like a number, like a money bag. They make me feel USED. Just my humble opinion, YMMV.

 

Cap, Cap, Cap....you can simply ask to be spanked, might make things easier on you ;) You're on a bit of a roll lately!

[capitalman 3861]

hahah..yes, you're right. I'm on a bad roll eh?

 

Well I suppose I'm making some wrong assumptions...but that's why I'm posting to spark discussion and get answers. I don't want to feel this way, I want to change. Hearing what everyone has to say helps me realize the truth and change, ya know?

[buggernot 588]

You're blunt and you're honest and willing to look at shit from a different angle. I never learned anything from doing it 'right' or the same way every time...mostly from all the times I fucked up. It's all good!

[capitalman 3861]

Well ya, I don't mean any disrespect to anyone. I'm just participating. I see things from a different perspective now that Annessa and Emma have chimed in about my comments. And just to make one thing clear, I have a really hard time booking ahead, my work doesn't allow it so short term notice is my preference. I'm a spontaneous type. So if I may, I'll correct part of what I said to include that it MIGHT make me feel like second choice...but that's OKAY, okay?

 

It'll be a miracle if any lovely lady agrees to see me after all this! Anyone got a shovel?

[Seymour 3970]

If a lady posts in her ad she works from 12:00 noon to 6:00 pm and someone cancels and she decides to revise her ad "Had a cancellation, hey guys 4:00 pm is still available" - well no big deal. I mean, she's running a business after all and ultimately this is about business.

 

However - if the lady sends a PM and says "hey xxx my 4:00 just canceled, I would love to see you. Can you make it out today?" Well that is different. I don't mean for this to sound like a rant, it is not - I'm just using this example to illustrate how it is possible to make a client feel like a number.

 

From a client perspective, I book with someone because I want to see you, spend time with you, because you are the one who is on my mind. Sometimes yes we do like to be spontaneous, yes sometimes ladies have limited availability, but once I'm there you are the only one in my mind and on my mind. Like Cap said, some of us have not so flexible schedules so we cannot always book days or weeks in advance. It is not fair for the lady to book and then cancel the day of. Personally, I value my time, so I try to not waste yours.

[A***** A***** 510]

again, don't ask me to repeat what can be found on my site or I will turn into a mocking bird:roll:

[fortunateone 156618]

Maybe he thought that that was your European half? And that you were going to wear a curly wig for him? OK, nothing defensible here, sorry I even tried ;)

 

But since this thread is about what not to say to you lovely ladies, and even though I know some guys will describe themselves in a bit of detail before meeting, reading that he was putting this description in there makes me wonder - how much do you girls care about any of it? I've never bothered with any description at all, just keep things to making a pleasant business inquiry or transaction and that's that. My perspective is that you really don't care so why bother?

 

Would you ladies prefer not to get the overly self-descriptive notes with vivid detailed fantasies of what this potential client you've never met wants to do with you?? Asking about services is a different matter of course...

 

Unless there is some unusual physical condition that would affect the appt, I see no great reason to include pictures or descriptions. Sometimes it gives me the impression (with younger guys) that they are seeking some sort of deal due to hotness factors as tho their superior bodies are somehow worth more than the polite kindness of an older gentleman with few extra pounds.

 

Detailed fantasies in the emails signal waste of time. If there is anything specific or fetish in your tastes, it is easy enough to simply say do you do foot fetish and leave it at that. Most sps can read between the lines, and frankly, a detailed fantasy story is more likely to hit the junk file only partially read. :-P

[capitalman 3861]

Detailed fantasies in the emails signal waste of time.

 

Well with all due respect, SP's I've seen have invited me to send them a fantasy or tell them in advance what I want, and I've learned this is a good way to get what I want by telling the girl ahead of time what I'd like to happen. I guess there are as many different types of SPs as there are guys right? Some see it as a waste of time, some see it as a service or way to connect with their client so the hour or two hours or whatever goes by a little more comfortably. Just my YMMV. :)

[Seymour 3970]

Well with all due respect, SP's I've seen have invited me to send them a fantasy or tell them in advance what I want, and I've learned this is a good way to get what I want by telling the girl ahead of time what I'd like to happen. I guess there are as many different types of SPs as there are guys right? Some see it as a waste of time, some see it as a service or way to connect with their client so the hour or two hours or whatever goes by a little more comfortably. Just my YMMV. :)

 

Agreed cap - an SP one's seen prior will read a well written fantasy email and likely act on it if within the scope of her services.

 

For the guys out there that send abrupt abrasive emails with explicit content like "I want to take xx and stick it into your xxx - guess what happens to those emails? Yeah - your email address gets flagged as a junk sender and all your current and future emails get deleted and you never get the time of day.

[Emma Alexandra 123367]

Agreed cap - an SP one's seen prior will read a well written fantasy email and likely act on it if within the scope of her services.

 

For the guys out there that send abrupt abrasive emails with explicit content like "I want to take xx and stick it into your xxx - guess what happens to those emails? Yeah - your email address gets flagged as a junk sender and all your current and future emails get deleted and you never get the time of day.

 

hahaha thats so true.....thats why you can never get an appointment with me Symour...lmao

[PistolPete 61421]

Well with all due respect, SP's I've seen have invited me to send them a fantasy or tell them in advance what I want, and I've learned this is a good way to get what I want by telling the girl ahead of time what I'd like to happen. I guess there are as many different types of SPs as there are guys right? Some see it as a waste of time, some see it as a service or way to connect with their client so the hour or two hours or whatever goes by a little more comfortably. Just my YMMV. :)

 

Yes Cap, love the fantasy thing too! 1 time my SP took it bit far, in public..but it was very erotic, and very sexy...ever been cuffed ...

[PistolPete 61421]

Or the last time I had an outcall the SP try to embarass me around my neighbours....she was early..I wouldn't let her in right away.

[Annessa 22743]

if you're tastful about your wishes I'm sure any sp would be happy to clarify what shes comfortable with.

 

the bad experience that some ladies have is if they are too allowing in the details they receive and are asked to respond in detail, sometimes I know I've gotten the dude who just calls or writes ans says :I'd really love to lick your ** is that ok...how about that? would that get you hot? do you like that?" or something of the sort......I would reply that that was fine with me in my newbie days and then realize that this person never booked....just liked the idea of someone reading his desires and responding. I almost feel like saying (and have when I've called someone on calling me on my work-phone like that repeatedly) to people like that "there are phone-lines for that yanno??? please dont waste my time!

 

I am all for mapping out restrictions etc...but going too far into detail can raise tiny little red flags for us ladies reminding us of certain creepy men not in it for the experience itself. if you have to map out a play-by-play before going with the flow, you've planned this in your head waaaaay too much IMO....and putting it in our heads that if it doesn't go exactly according to your fantasy, you will be dissapointed.

 

at that point I dont accept the date....even knowing that I will show him the time of his life and more. if you tell me how the entire date has to go before I see you (kinda similar to a football coach mapping out a play) I'm just not interested, thats all...and am allowed to be so.

[a******s.m*****e 187]

I agree with Annessa. In the beginning I was naive enough to get into exchanging detailed emails like that. I remember one instance when someone kept writing about his fantasy, saying that he would come to see me after work.

 

When after work time came I've never heard from him again, my emails bounced. We all get these cases and learn pretty soon not to take them seriously.

 

The same fantasies from clients I've seen before are OK. As long as they really mean to come to see me I don't mind exchanging a few naughty emails.

 

I, too, am turned off by very elaborate first time fantasies. I am not Julia Robers for God's sakes! If you want me to star in your own private movie, remember that she gets 20 million each:)

[Seymour 3970]

hahaha thats so true.....thats why you can never get an appointment with me Symour...lmao

 

 

Damn - that explains a lot - gee, I only had one fantasy with involving tar and feathers and now I'm blacklisted forever. :mrgreen:

 

But seriously, this message and this thread will fall on a lot of deaf ears. The yahoos that email you gals with explicit graphic fantasies or requests are likely not the ones to read the content here and learn from it because they are likely looking to just get their rocks off.

 

For those that are taking the time to read, remember this - respect and courtesy, politeness and discretion goes a long way to help establish chemistry, trust and help you as a client to experience something extra-ordinary.

 

And Miss emma - I will have to change my email address, so watch for my new fantasy request, coming soon to an inbox near you. :grin:

[mmaman315 101]

As for what to ask a sp, I mean you really shouldn't be asking them much lol Obviously each sp is going to be different and some more personable than others and also some have a complete fake lifestyle made up to tell clients where some devulge some truth about their life. Asking an sp their age, nationality, limitations and whatnot are always fine but once you get personal which every question generally is your treding into waters where they probably don't want to swim. My suggestion is see an sp regularly and treat them well and over time you'll develop a relationship with them and then you can get to know them. These ladies deal with so many different people who want to know everything about them and you don't want to be thought as one of the many you want to be thought of as a special client to them.

 

I just know being respectful and understanding with sp's has allowed me to develop a good relationship with the ladies I know and that i've never had a problem and over time gotten to know them or should I say the real them :):boobies:

[Emma Alexandra 123367]

Damn - that explains a lot - gee, I only had one fantasy with involving tar and feathers and now I'm blacklisted forever. :mrgreen:

 

But seriously, this message and this thread will fall on a lot of deaf ears. The yahoos that email you gals with explicit graphic fantasies or requests are likely not the ones to read the content here and learn from it because they are likely looking to just get their rocks off.

 

For those that are taking the time to read, remember this - respect and courtesy, politeness and discretion goes a long way to help establish chemistry, trust and help you as a client to experience something extra-ordinary.

 

And Miss emma - I will have to change my email address, so watch for my new fantasy request, coming soon to an inbox near you. :grin:

 

All kidding aside You are absolutely right Seymour...RESPECT and COURTESY,POLITENESS AND DISCRETION goes along way.....

kisses,

Emma A

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

if you have to map out a play-by-play before going with the flow, you've planned this in your head waaaaay too much IMO.... if you tell me how the entire date has to go before I see you (kinda similar to a football coach mapping out a play) I'm just not interested, thats all...and am allowed to be so.

 

Well said! Mapping-out plays is ok in the locker room, but once you're out on the field at the line of scrimmage and actually see the defence ... well, sometimes ya just gotta call an audible (ha!)

 

Okay, joking aside ...

 

One instructive aspect suggested by Annessa's analogy is that in football you're playing against an opponent, whereas meeting another person is instead a co-operative effort. Every friendly encounter between two people is a joint enterprise (hence the "com" in the word "companion"). And the excitement? It lies precisely in the real-time unpredictable interactivity with another person ... and drawing nourishment from that other person's own unique and precious creativity and imagination.

 

Spending time with a true companion is not a pre-plannable cookie-cutter experience ... who could possibly want it to be such a restrictively fettered thing?? If all I really wanted was a simple cookie, I'd just keep my rolling pin at home and whisper sweet-nothings to my recipe box instead ...

[Annessa 22743]

Every friendly encounter between two people is a joint enterprise (hence the "com" in the word "companion"). And the excitement? It lies precisely in the real-time unpredictable interactivity with another person ... and drawing nourishment from that other person's own unique and precious creativity and imagination.

 

Spending time with a true companion is not a pre-plannable cookie-cutter experience ... who could possibly want it to be such a restrictively fettered thing?? If all I really wanted was a simple cookie, I'd just keep my rolling pin at home and whisper sweet-nothings to my recipe box instead ...

 

awww...such a cute analogy. And I agree...there are so many types of wonderful ladies in the industry that no experience can planned as a cookie cutter experience. Tasty analogy

 

however, now I'm hungry for cookie dough.

 

hehe ;-)

[Andee 220524]

I do advertise my hours. I try not to book guys back to back. I also do not indicate "openings", however, if someone calls me in the morning for a later-in-the-day appt. I do ask them to call if they're not coming and of course to call when they're in their designated parking area.

 

I do not appreciate when I'm asked "so how many guys have you seen today" . I also hate it when they say "when I'm in that area I'll give you call" to which I reply. You can try me, but unless you book a time, I can't guarantee you that time will be available.

 

What I'm saying is sometimes, they don't make it easy for us either you know. I'm not a walk-in service...:???:

[Jim.Bean 241]

I got to say that I catually found this quite funny.

 

How can any guy in his right mind ask personal question? Finances, Insurance? lmfo

 

I will usually ask if it's alright to kiss and seems like everything just goes smooth from there. Sometimes after the "act" if there is cuddle time an SP will tell me some stuff about her life, family, hobbies, but I never ask. ever.

 

I have been asked some fairly personal info from SP's and sometimes I share and sometimes I divert

 

Jake

[natalielove 101]

The thing I dislike being asked the most is to do gfe services when we don't have a gfe session. Getting asked why I won't make an exception for them or "just this once" makes me uncomfortable and frusterated! I also don't like being asked my real name or if I will see them outside of work.... especially if we've just met!

[Victoria Banks 21899]

- what do you do with your money

- do you have a boyfriend

- why do you do this

- are you a cop

- can you do 100$ for 30 MIN

- can you make me a deal

- how much does this room cost

- can we just do it bb for a minute please

 

All I can think of right now.

[Nicolette Vaughn 294340]

How much money do you make?

 

Do you declare your income?

 

Do you have a boyfriend?

 

Do you have kids?

 

Can we go out sometime for drinks?

 

Why are you an escort?

 

Can you introduce me to your friend who is upstairs?

 

Can she watch us have sex?

 

How many guys have you seen today?

[RobX 2084]

Do you have a boyfriend?

Do you have kids?

Why are you an escort?

 

Does the rule of etiquette regarding not asking an SP personal questions still apply if she has asked you the same questions and you have answered her questions? For example, here are some questions I have been asked at a first meeting:

 

What part of town do you live in?

Are you married?

Do you have kids?

How often do you and your wife do it?

What other girls have you seen?

 

I understand that some questions are NOT reciprocal. For example, if she asks me why I chose my field, I still cannot ask her why she became an escort. However, what about the examples I gave above. Is it OK to ask her the same questions after she asks me? And if she asks me what other girls have you seen, is it OK to talk about them?