How to post a lukewarm review

[Boomer 33202]

By definition a recommendation is a positive, and luke warm doesn't fit

 

I post very few reviews, mainly because I think it has to be exceptional and probably a long term relationship, and secondly I think the reco reflects on my reputation. The problem occurs when you've had a bad experience, one in which you feel cheated. This has only happened once here in the last five years, and at the time, made me want to out the lady in question as I believed she would do the same thing to other clients. I used a method a few guys use, with a note in a relevant thread, that I had seen her and that if anyone wanted information they could contact me by PM. T inference was made and I was inundated and justified by a thread on a compensator board.

 

I think you have take recos with a grain of salt, and use multiple sources when you are researching a date. It also pays to get familiar with the members who do post recos and get familiar with their reputation and posting style.

[Phaedrus 209521]

Another phenomenon is that clients on purpose dont write about an SP they met, because the reco might cause a surge in demand, and then she would be booked solid from months, not available to him!

 

This is horribly short-sighted, IMO. I'm sure people do it, but I think it's just... wrong.

 

Firstly: there's a good chance it may be horribly counter-productive. As has been noted already, people will, rightly or wrongly, infer things from a lack of recos. And so by withholding a reco from someone you like, far from ensuring she'll be available when you want her, you may be sowing the seeds that will force her out of the business entirely! Really, if you want to see her again, your first priority should be to ensure that she stays in the business rather than just giving it up as a bad job.

 

Secondly: I'm highly skeptical of the idea of a SP being booked solid for months. That just doesn't happen, because we guys don't seem to book that far in advance. I don't think I've ever had any trouble arranging a meeting even a couple of days in advance; the only issues I've ever had with availability have been for last-minute appointments ("Are you free in half an hour?" "No, sorry." "OK, some other time, then..."). If she's worth it to you, you'll get your ass in gear and organize a meeting whenever convenient for as long as you want. If you can't do that, you clearly don't care that much.

 

Finally: if you've benefitted from recos written here by other people, is there not at least a small moral obligation to give something back to the community? I know we can't force you, or even know if you haven't, but still... if everyone withheld recos for fear of their favorite SPs being booked solid, there simply wouldn't be any recos at all, and we'd all be much poorer for it.

[Guest Ou**or**n]

A lukewarm review is just that - a review. Whether you view it to be balanced or not is beside the point. This board is a recommendation board and the nature of a recommendation is exactly what several of the fine members above have pointed out.

 

If you wish to write a review then do so on the boards that accept them. As indicated, most people here read other boards. There is no reason this board should ever be the sole source of information someone should use when selecting a provider.

 

Read recommendations here, read reviews on other boards, develop relationships with other members via pm, read the ladies website, read the ladies posts, contact the lady directly. There are many avenues of information gathering open to people.

[roamingguy 300292]

Another phenomenon is that clients on purpose dont write about an SP they met, because the reco might cause a surge in demand, and then she would be booked solid from months, not available to him!

 

Any man of that mindset, all he does is a disservice to the lady he saw and claims to like. A recommendation serves to me at least three purposes. First, it is a public thank you to the lady from the gentleman for a good encounter. Second, it tells other gentlemen out there of a lady who provides good or great encounters. And third, related to the second, it is a way for the lady to continue building her business, by getting new clients. Remember, this is their livelihood, how they pay their bills/rent/put food on the table etc

It is completely selfish and short sighted, with no basis in rational thought to not write a recommendation for the above reason. There is also underlying that belief, a bit (well a lot actually) of possessiveness on the client's part (I saw her but no one else can) A gentleman would never not write a recommendation for that reason.

And any man thinking along those lines, well is he prepared to be the lady's exclusive client every day 365/year...probably not.

A late night rambling

RG

[herelookin 3510]

I understand that Cerb does not accept the posting of negative reviews.

 

My understanding is that CERB is a "recommendation board" not a "review board". So if you are not willing to "recommend" the lady then you have nothing to say... on this board. IMHO.

[ace881 295]

read about this idea (no reco for selfish reasons) in Montreal review boards, but yeah, sounds pretty dumb to me. However, seeing some of the trolls on the other boards who post negative reviews on a weekly basis, i wouldn't put it past them to do this...

[BootyLoving 2441]

I generally have a rule of thumb when deciding who to see. If they have been new here for more than a couple of days and have no review, and no other lady to vouch for them, I pass. Unless its so interesting that its worth a TOFTT.

 

But yes, for me, no review and long time advertiser means waste of time and money. But that's me. There is no other metric I can measure by. Period.

 

I only think this way, since there are many lukewarm experiences that I've experience for which I posted no reviews for, hence no recommendation on those not so great experience.

 

Also important to keep in mind that the experience is only as great as the both+ participants are willing to make it.

 

Sometimes a great client is what it takes to have a great experience, not just the SP. However, when a client has done all he could to, and the SP is not jiving, it's deserving of a negative review. This forum isn't the place for that unfortunately.

[bcguy42 38594]

I find it funny to read this thread on the significance of recommendations versus no recommendations in that I just finished a reply to a new member telling him not to be scared off from someone just because there were no recommendations.

 

I hope he reads through this whole thread as it explains how the greatest of ladies can have no recommendations or only a few.

 

Personally, I take the recommendations as just part of the whole process in deciding who to contact.

[Guest happytimes]

Imoho Cerb should balance the needs of both SP's and hobbyists. SP's wish to attract safe, well mannered hobbyists. Hobbyists wish to find attractive compatable SP's to have a great time with. I have been a hobbyist for 2 years. I have had 3 or 4 exceptional experiences which were worthy of fantastic reviews. I have also had 3 or 4 disappointing encounters. All others experiences I would describe as fulfilling. Unfortunately I have no way of passing on my negative experiences because of CERB's 1st rule, "if you don't have anything good to say don't say anything at all". This limits the usefulness of the board for hobbiest. My most recent bad experience was with an experienced long time cerb member with many great reviews. From everything I saw on CERB about her, I was going to have the time of my life with her. What she was lacking was any recent reviews within the last 9 months. Perhaps her attitude had soured recently and unfortunately I had no way of knowing this. She was angry with the world and as you know "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned". My experience was upsetting and bothered me for days. There was no way of warning other hobbiests of their impending doom. Is there another way for hobbyists to share a bad experience without opening the doors to bashing reputations. Maintain the afore mentioned balance of SP and hobbyist needs but improve the overall usefulness of the board. What CERB is missing is a way for hobbyists to share their opinions without hurting the reputations of our wonderful SP's. This is my idea: It would be useful to make an SP aware of negative aspects of their service privately channeled through the mod to keep the hobbyist's identity secure and to keep reputations intact. An SP can choose to be informed when a complaint (suggestion) is made and either dismiss it or learn from it. It is similar to filling out a customer survey card at a restaurant. You learn more from the bad ones than from the good ones. If multiple complaints from many hobbyists are logged, the mod would be aware of a reoccuring problem and choose to act on it (or not). A hobbyist that continually complains about SP's may just be a cronic complainer and may not be of value to be passed on. This would be taking CERB to the next level; from facilitator to industry trailblazer. Imoho CERB is GREAT but it could be GREATER.

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Additional Comments:

If your experience was not positive, there is another Board where you can be more candid. Most people on cerb are on the other Board too. Many use this Board as there are more photos, and there is the opportunity to PM or chat to get to know the SP/MPA. Then many go to the other Board to determine whether they want to meet the SP/MPA.

This will accomplish your goal.

 

I agree that CERB is missing something. It would be nice to get everything here; no need to surf elsewhere.

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[roamingguy 300292]

Imoho Cerb should balance the needs of both SP's and hobbyists. SP's wish to attract safe, well mannered hobbyists. Hobbyists wish to find attractive compatable SP's to have a great time with. I have been a hobbyist for 2 years. I have had 3 or 4 exceptional experiences which were worthy of fantastic reviews. I have also had 3 or 4 disappointing encounters. All others experiences I would describe as fulfilling. Unfortunately I have no way of passing on my negative experiences because of CERB's 1st rule, "if you don't have anything good to say don't say anything at all". This limits the usefulness of the board for hobbiest. My most recent bad experience was with an experienced long time cerb member with many great reviews. From everything I saw on CERB about her, I was going to have the time of my life with her. What she was lacking was any recent reviews within the last 9 months. Perhaps her attitude had soured recently and unfortunately I had no way of knowing this. She was angry with the world and as you know "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned". My experience was upsetting and bothered me for days. There was no way of warning other hobbiests of their impending doom. Is there another way for hobbyists to share a bad experience without opening the doors to bashing reputations. Maintain the afore mentioned balance of SP and hobbyist needs but improve the overall usefulness of the board. What CERB is missing is a way for hobbyists to share their opinions without hurting the reputations of our wonderful SP's. This is my idea: It would be useful to make an SP aware of negative aspects of their service privately channeled through the mod to keep the hobbyist's identity secure and to keep reputations intact. An SP can choose to be informed when a complaint (suggestion) is made and either dismiss it or learn from it. It is similar to filling out a customer survey card at a restaurant. You learn more from the bad ones than from the good ones. If multiple complaints from many hobbyists are logged, the mod would be aware of a reoccuring problem and choose to act on it (or not). A hobbyist that continually complains about SP's may just be a cronic complainer and may not be of value to be passed on. This would be taking CERB to the next level; from facilitator to industry trailblazer. Imoho CERB is GREAT but it could be GREATER.

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Additional Comments:

 

 

I agree that CERB is missing something. It would be nice to get everything here; no need to surf elsewhere.

Posted via Mobile Device

 

First there are other boards out there...I've tried a few in addition to CERB, and the ones I was on seemed to thrive on negativity. I have a very negative work environment, this lifestyle is my escape, I don't need it to be negative too

And CERB is for the ladies a, for lack of a better term, a safe board. All of us, ladies and gentlemen are equal participants here. My guess, it starts going down the road of allowing negative reviews, you'll find the ladies leaving.

Finally, when you join CERB, the policy is very clear, "if you have nothing nice to say don't say anything at all" So when you joined CERB you knew at the outset the rules. If you don't agree with it, go to a board that has a policy you do agree with

From a CERB member content with the CERB policy of positivity

RG

[fortunateone 156618]

First there are other boards out there...I've tried a few in addition to CERB, and the ones I was on seemed to thrive on negativity. I have a very negative work environment, this lifestyle is my escape, I don't need it to be negative too

And CERB is for the ladies a, for lack of a better term, a safe board. All of us, ladies and gentlemen are equal participants here. My guess, it starts going down the road of allowing negative reviews, you'll find the ladies leaving.

Finally, when you join CERB, the policy is very clear, "if you have nothing nice to say don't say anything at all" So when you joined CERB you knew at the outset the rules. If you don't agree with it, go to a board that has a policy you do agree with

From a CERB member content with the CERB policy of positivity

RG

 

 

The ladies definitely do leave the negative boards, and if they don't they only come on long enough to check messages and post an ad, and maybe respond to a review in some way.

 

There are lots of negative boards out there, and sometime these boards are used as weapons against us all. I would just suggest that if someone is considering seeing any sp, they have to also investigate the guys who post recos or reviews about her first and foremost. The issue with negative reviews and comments is often that it is about some minor and odd event, or out of control of the sp or the client.

 

I've seen curious negative comments in a review that, not kidding, was the reviewer was 'disappointed' because the sp looked exactly like her recent photos, but he expected her to look better than the photos in her advertising. So any number of things can lead to expectations not being met, which can lead to a disappointing session. There isn't always anything that can resolve that in a reco or a 'bad' review, or backchannel critiques.

[igab 5629]

There is another un-wholesome aspect to a negative or not so complimentary review...it could be the competition or someone who has been asked by a competitor to post less than complimentary remarks about someone else. It's dirty and low down but it happens on the other boards I'm sure. That isn't allowed here and it's much appreciated by all involved.

 

At the end of the day I've been a hobbiest for nearly 5 years and I use a combination of ways to determine the desirability of seeing a lady. A review is only one factor. I know the veteran hobbiests and we go by word of mouth and I've come to learn the tell tales of the trade, as it were. There really is research and some intelligence needed if you don't want to end up with an empty wallet and an unsatisfied libido.

[Guest happytimes]

First there are other boards out there...I've tried a few in addition to CERB, and the ones I was on seemed to thrive on negativity. I have a very negative work environment, this lifestyle is my escape, I don't need it to be negative too

And CERB is for the ladies a, for lack of a better term, a safe board. All of us, ladies and gentlemen are equal participants here. My guess, it starts going down the road of allowing negative reviews, you'll find the ladies leaving.

Finally, when you join CERB, the policy is very clear, "if you have nothing nice to say don't say anything at all" So when you joined CERB you knew at the outset the rules. If you don't agree with it, go to a board that has a policy you do agree with

From a CERB member content with the CERB policy of positivity

RG

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[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

Don't see the point of a "lukewarm" review. Each and every encounter is different and mostly depends on chemistry. If you have an awful or dangerous time, then the warnings section is available. If you had a "lukewarm" encounter doesn't mean the next bloke will. I don't see the need to tarnish a lady's reputation just because she didn't fulfill your particular fantasy or expectation.

[roamingguy 300292]

Don't see the point of a "lukewarm" review. Each and every encounter is different and mostly depends on chemistry. If you have an awful or dangerous time, then the warnings section is available. If you had a "lukewarm" encounter doesn't mean the next bloke will. I don't see the need to tarnish a lady's reputation just because she didn't fulfill your particular fantasy or expectation.

 

Good point about chemistry Meg. And those guys who want to post a "lukewarm" review of a lady after an encounter with her, do they include in their review, how their own contribution made the encounter "lukewarm?" It does take two to tango after all.

Not all people click, that isn't anyone's fault, so why post lukewarm or negative reviews

Another two cents

RG

[Phaedrus 209521]

Unfortunately I have no way of passing on my negative experiences because of CERB's 1st rule, "if you don't have anything good to say don't say anything at all". This limits the usefulness of the board for hobbiest.

 

CERB, like other boards, runs the way it runs. Different people want different things from their boards; they have different priorities, and different ideas of what should and shouldn't be allowed. As others have said, if you want to read or write negative reviews then there are places you can go and do that. Feel free to do so.

 

As for limiting the usefulness of the board for the guys... in the short term, perhaps. But please pay attention to this:

 

The ladies definitely do leave the negative boards, and if they don't they only come on long enough to check messages and post an ad, and maybe respond to a review in some way.

 

It's true. And my take on this is that in the long run, it's worth keeping the ladies around, as I learn far more from their participation here than I could possibly learn from the occasional (or even frequent) bad review. I've learned what they like, and dislike; I've learned what matters to them and what doesn't; I've learned what to do - or not - to make an encounter a success and a fun time for all concerned. Reading the ladies' posts gives me an insight into their character that you just don't get from even the best review/reco, and this is also immensely useful to me as it gives me an idea of who I'm likely to get on with and who I perhaps... won't. I don't claim to know everything yet... but I'm working on it :)

 

YMMV, of course.

 

This is my idea: It would be useful to make an SP aware of negative aspects of their service privately channeled through the mod to keep the hobbyist's identity secure and to keep reputations intact. An SP can choose to be informed when a complaint (suggestion) is made and either dismiss it or learn from it.

 

It's a good idea in principle; the problem with it is that Mod is permanently snowed under with things to do, and this would be a significant addition to that workload, so it's highly unlikely, alas.

 

It would be nice to get everything here; no need to surf elsewhere.

 

Nice, but impossible. You add one thing, you lose others. You add negative reviews, you lose the SPs. That's just the way life is!

[Athos 108589]

CERB for me is now a social network, rather than a review board. It still is a recommendation board for sure, but the community is what makes it, at least for me.

 

I'm still on a couple of other boards, and no one can post anything without it degenerating into backbiting and bickering. And much of it is directed at the ladies. Really nasty stuff.

 

As RG said, this lifestyle is about escape. There's enough crap in the world, I don't have any interest in spending time on a board that is dominated by angry, negative people.

 

Porthos

[Guest happytimes]

Thank you Pheadrus for responding to my post. You understood the intentions of my post.

 

I agree with the first rule of CERB. I agree completely that public neg. reviews should be kept out of CERB. My suggestion was for a private anonymous channel for expressing opinions through the mod to the SP. There is currently no method to pass on constructive criticism unless you go to another board and write a neg. review. With input from the many intellegent CERB members, we should be able to design a creative, efficient method to communicate openly. We need keep it easy for the mod to manage.

 

Keep the recomendations positive but also provide an avenue for confidentially sharing suggestions. Even complaining can be done in a positive way. How can we expect an SP to be our fantasy woman if we can't communicate when something goes wrong? For example, if an SP found that 9/10 clients felt like they were being rushed out early. She could then act on this feedback to create an unrushed atmosphere at the end of the session.

 

Honest opinions if handled correctly can be a good thing. Respect to the ladies always. Happy

[TaylorMonroe 2874]

I completely agree with you, happytime, constructive criticism is NOT a bad thing at all!! It's simply a suggestion as to how someone can improve their ways. Whether they agree or not, it's up to them, but being able to communicate opinions SHOULD be allowed... If, of course, done in a polite and respectful manner. If a SP presents herself as being unhygenic for instance, or is always late, or gossips about other clients (to client), or is as cold as a dead fish (sorry for that analogy), men browsing and considering "her" should be well aware of the PROS AND CONS. However, childish, petty, heated emotional rants and finger pointing CLEARLY should NOT be allowed! There's a fine line between attacking a SP based on melodrama and raw emotions and constructively critisizing her... Reviews stating her lack of potential aren't bashing and degrading; they're simply stating the TRUTH... Their encounters as they were... Blunt and true. So, I agree, there should be a venue on CERB that allows these types of comments. Nothing in the world is perfect, citing imperfections should be allowed, welcomed, gladly accepted and widely appreciated.

[Guest **n****er]

Agree with Taylor M.

[roamingguy 300292]

I completely agree with you, happytime, constructive criticism is NOT a bad thing at all!! It's simply a suggestion as to how someone can improve their ways. Whether they agree or not, it's up to them, but being able to communicate opinions SHOULD be allowed... If, of course, done in a polite and respectful manner. If a SP presents herself as being unhygenic for instance, or is always late, or gossips about other clients (to client), or is as cold as a dead fish (sorry for that analogy), men browsing and considering "her" should be well aware of the PROS AND CONS. However, childish, petty, heated emotional rants and finger pointing CLEARLY should NOT be allowed! There's a fine line between attacking a SP based on melodrama and raw emotions and constructively critisizing her... Reviews stating her lack of potential aren't bashing and degrading; they're simply stating the TRUTH... Their encounters as they were... Blunt and true. So, I agree, there should be a venue on CERB that allows these types of comments. Nothing in the world is perfect, citing imperfections should be allowed, welcomed, gladly accepted and widely appreciated.

 

Not disagreeing with constructive criticism...but that should be a dialogue between the gentleman and the ladydone PRIVATELY

Maybe the lady had an off day. Maybe there was no chemistry. Maybe the gentleman's expectations were different than what the lady said she provides and so on.

And a thought here. For those guys wanting to post a public negative review of a lady, that everyone and the lady herself too (remember that)

can read, why don't you have the same willingness to privately discuss (even by email or pm) your issues with the lady. She'll read about it one way or the other, at least privately shows respect. Once a negative review is posted, a lady can't respond, not without it sounding defensive. And she can't comment about the guy's possible role in the encounter being negative (it does, after all take two to tango)

But truly, if you have a need for criticism, there are other boards...this board runs very fine, thanks to the Mod and Council and the ladies and gentleman who make up this community

Another two cents

RG

[cat 262460]

I agree with RG, if you have an issue with a provider then you should first discuss it directly with her and give her the opportunity to rectify the situation. If it can't be resolved to satisfaction then there are plenty of places to post warnings. A woman cannot respond online to something negative without being flammed by the trolls and once it is out there, it's almost impossible for her to make it right with the client that had the issue AND her ability to make an income has been hurt.

CERB has the traffic it does because of the policies that are in place. This is the only safe place for providers to interact with clients because the favorite troll aspects of online forums have been eliminated. It's maintained by diligent moderation and a general respect that is expected to be shown by all.

On another board I have a multipage thread that the first 3 pages were posters slamming me and THEY HAD NEVER MET ME!!! Finally, a guest of mine posted a review and because he didn't have a high post count was accused of shilling. To this day I don't have a negative review out there because my guests know that if something doesn't work for them, all they have to do is tell me and I will make it right...

cat

[Guest **n****er]

I can appreciate that this forums rules are set up for a particular reason and it works very well as evidence by it's members, dialogue, traffic, events etc. I just wish there were a place where real reviews (as opposed to recommendations) were accepted. I've been to them all. None of them are really what I have in my mind and I'm not gifted enough to create my own forum so in the meantime I just use them all and try to find all the info I can from all sources.

 

I guess what I'm getting at is that sometimes a man needs a no holds barred account of what took place. Some places offer this, but the variety of Ottawa's women aren't really reflected so it only works if you want to see a certain "type" of lady.

[Kubrickfan 12836]

I can appreciate that this forums rules are set up for a particular reason and it works very well as evidence by it's members, dialogue, traffic, events etc. I just wish there were a place where real reviews (as opposed to recommendations) were accepted. I've been to them all. None of them are really what I have in my mind and I'm not gifted enough to create my own forum so in the meantime I just use them all and try to find all the info I can from all sources.

 

I guess what I'm getting at is that sometimes a man needs a no holds barred account of what took place. Some places offer this, but the variety of Ottawa's women aren't really reflected so it only works if you want to see a certain "type" of lady.

 

There are other boards that do that. Each board exists for a reason; cerb has reasonably chose the path it did for "social" reasons and the business prospects that offers.

 

I agree it can get a little over the top here at time with political correctness, but you can usually find what you are looking for on the other boards. Its all good.

[Guest happytimes]

To make my opinion clear. I do not agree that public negative reviews should be allowed on CERB. It would be nice to have a place on CERB to PRIVATELY, PRIVATELY, PRIVATELY share negative feedback with a SP. This is completely different than a PUBLIC negative review. The OP referred to giving a lukewarm reco. because on CERB there is no option to give a negative review. I was suggesting a hibrid PRIVATE review. The hobbyist could get something off his chest (id kept with mod) without hurting the SP's reputation. The mod could screen the comments for rudeness. The SP could get constructive criticism which they could choose to ignore or act on. I believe imoho that an SP would rather see private polite constructive criticism on CERB than to see public negative reviews on another board. Again I will restate that I do NOT believe that CERB should have negative reviews. Please don't put those words in my mouth. Be Happy Be Positive.

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