Client activism?

[VedaSloan 119179]

Yes, I think clients are a vital part of the sex workers rights movement.

 

Come out to events, be open about being a client (if you're able to). More clients need to speak up so that people will stop demonizing all of you as predators, rapists, and worse and recognize that just like sex workers, clients are as much a part of the community as anyone else and that any adult could potentially be a client or a sex worker (or both!).

 

That being said, if you do decide to become a member of a sex workers' rights organization, and you go to meetings and events, you should be up front about being a client (where appropriate). Not all sex workers are out and open about it and will likely be concerned about their personal privacy staying that way. This means not revealing any real names you might learn or other private details, or making connections to women you may recognize on CERB.

[JoyfulC 132299]

That's always been one of the big problems with sex work activism: few customers want to stand publicly with us. Sadly, even fewer will place sex work issues ahead of other considerations when voting.

 

But I think you're wrong that "decriminalizing" sex work will reduce the desire for secrecy and discretion. I think the choice to use the services of a sex worker is an intensely private thing for most customers (with the exception being those who prefer to take their business to the public streets). No matter how the laws or even public perceptions change, most of my customers would not want the whole world knowing when they're stepping out for sexual services. Many of my customers wouldn't be caught dead in a strip club or a store-front type massage parlour, simply because this is a very private thing for them, and they do no wish to share it with the world.--

 

Many of my customers are older and married a long time. In many cases, their marital sex lives are over, but they do not view their personal sex lives as being over. They wish to continue to be sexually active, but choose to do so very privately and discreetly, out of consideration for their spouses and families. You have to respect that.

 

(--I don't say this to be judgmental. Only that that's how some of my customers have told me that they feel. My own husband loves strip clubs, and while I don't think he's ever been to a massage parlour, I bet he'd enjoy the experience. He has neither a personal nor professional situation that would be adversely affected by being spotted at either.)

[Guest Ed The****]

Many of my customers are older and married a long time. In many cases, their marital sex lives are over, but they do not view their personal sex lives as being over. They wish to continue to be sexually active, but choose to do so very privately and discreetly, out of consideration for their spouses and families. You have to respect that.

 

I believe you have honed in on the issue for many of us. This is my situation and as such I am limited as to what I can do or say in public to support such an incentive. All I can do is try to be a good client to those ladies I see or have seen.

[Frank7 3939]

I wouldn't mind doing some activism for that cause, if someone warned me about events in Gatineau/Ottawa. It's a very important on so many points and i don't really have anything to hide.

 

When i do get a gf, i'm not sure how she'd feel about it though. (i know i'll be quitting the hobby, but maybe she'd be comfortable with the cause/activism)

[loopie 15358]

What do you sex trade workers consider your goal for this industry and what do you consider to be the biggest obstacle in getting there?

[oldblueeyez 15475]

Life is undeniably better when you interact sexually and sensuously with another human being.

It's hard enough for good looking guys to get lucky, let alone those of us with less appealing genes.

We have the right to enjoy all aspects of this life, including sexual. As long as both SP and Hobbyist

are voluntarily entering into a mutually beneficial arrangement, who the else's fucking business is it?

I think eventually, if one brave hobbyist takes it all the way to the Supreme Court, who knows what

may happen.

 

This hobby is simply too harmless to be on the bad side of legal!!!!!!!!!!!!

[neebleton 2940]

 

But I think you're wrong that "decriminalizing" sex work will reduce the desire for secrecy and discretion. I think the choice to use the services of a sex worker is an intensely private thing for most customers (with the exception being those who prefer to take their business to the public streets). No matter how the laws or even public perceptions change, most of my customers would not want the whole world knowing when they're stepping out for sexual services. Many of my customers wouldn't be caught dead in a strip club or a store-front type massage parlour, simply because this is a very private thing for them, and they do no wish to share it with the world.

 

 

I believe you have honed in on the issue for many of us. This is my situation and as such I am limited as to what I can do or say in public to support such an incentive. All I can do is try to be a good client to those ladies I see or have seen.

 

These are both entirely reasonable responses. Thanks for sharing them :)

 

Just to elaborate, my thinking is that there seems to be three major reasons for clients to remain secretive - legal reasons, social stigma, and marital strife. Decriminalization would remove the legal reasons, and maybe reduce social stigma, which would in turn reduce the need for secrecy. Of course, I have no idea how often, when a client keeps his hobby secret, his motivations fall into any one of those categories.

 

Anyway, just my 2 cents :)

[Moviefan 1238]

These are both entirely reasonable responses. Thanks for sharing them :)

 

Just to elaborate, my thinking is that there seems to be three major reasons for clients to remain secretive - legal reasons, social stigma, and marital strife. Decriminalization would remove the legal reasons, and maybe reduce social stigma, which would in turn reduce the need for secrecy. Of course, I have no idea how often, when a client keeps his hobby secret, his motivations fall into any one of those categories.

 

Anyway, just my 2 cents :)

 

What are the legal ramifications of being a client?

 

The only ones I can think of are divorce, or soliciting an officer. and being found in a bawdy house, not sure if there are any others.

[datyaddict 2174]

While not outright 'activism', there is some level of consciousness-raising and misinformation-correcting we can do in our personal lives whenever the topic comes up.

 

Here's a magical phrase for hobbyists:

"I dunno, I just read an awesome article on my favourite [movie/politics/porn] blog that interviewed actual real sex workers, and it turns out...."

 

Use it with your friends, co-workers, family... whenever somebody says something ignorant, boneheaded, or just misinformed. When it comes up around drinks after work, or while watching the news with family.

 

Then you can actually subtly inform people, bust stereotypes, spread awareness, and advocate for better/safer working conditions without actually having to come out and mention the Poly Parties ;)

 

You don't have to march or wave flags, just make useful and factual contributions to conversations. And remember, you're not just talking to the person you may be arguing with, there may be 'undecideds' listening, who could learn something.

[Emma Alexandra 123368]

Clients could start by supporting Sex Workers organization by donating to them since the Harper government has and still is cutting their funds a little bit more every year since they are in power. For example, Stella, the Montreal group that has been a model of excellence in community work recognized by numerous prizes given by le Ministére de la santé et des services sociaux du Québec, the city of Montreal, has seen is budget cut of over 100 000$ in the last year (which represent more than a fifth of it for 12 persons working full time. A drop in center, health and legal services, support for victim of violence, etc).

 

In order to get a little money to be able to keep on producing the Stella's Bulletin and Bad trick list (which is distributed to hundreds of sex workers every month and was used by police to arrest at least one serial killer of sex workers in Montreal), Stella just produced a 2013 poster calendar that can be bought by contacting Stella at [email protected].

 

It is 20$ plus mailing, it is sexy, fun, very well done and as with everything Stella does, has an educative twist to it also I'm the month of April...wink