Hmushman 512 Report post Posted November 6, 2012 Hello all, I am interested in seeing a SP but I am a bit apprehensive about it. I am married and love my wife and I am looking for a different sexual experience and not a new romance. Is it possible to keep those seperated? I'm not worried about getting caught, I am just worried about trying to rationalize it. How do others deal with this and am I making too big of a deal out of it? Thank you very much for your help. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Studio 110 by Sophia 150333 Report post Posted November 6, 2012 I am sure the Gentlemen on this board will be a good help to you. But here are a few thoughts.... Best to have a phone that you use only for the hobby. IE pre paid phone...Keep it somewhere like at work. Use this phone to make your bookings and confirmation. Always bring your own soap to your session. Whatever scent you use normally. This way you can shower and wash any other scents off of you. DONT STOP having sex with your SO, this is a dead give away. A separate play account may be good, if your SO likes to watch your account closely. Be mindful of what you can afford.. This is not a hobby for all. For some it can save a marriage, whereas it can relive some tensions from your sex life. Gives you fulfillment where you need it, allows you to do something special just for yourself. But if you are feeling real guilty and carry that around with you, she may pick up on that too. Women are great at reading your thoughts and actions...women's intuition. So be sure if you try it, then decide it is what you need, then be sure to play safe and smart. You probably have next to no chance of getting caught your first visit. But if you make it a hobby, then be sure your happy with it, and that it is helping you and not hindering you. Dont stop being a husband to your SO. Best luck, enjoy yourself, and play safe! 5 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
contraman 5480 Report post Posted November 6, 2012 I think it's pretty obvious from this board that people can keep sex and romance separated. IMO: if you choose to take part in this hobby, you should do it with open eyes. You are trading some money for someone's time and services. Some of the women (assuming you're interested in women) you will encounter are going to provide amazing sexual experiences. And some of them may not be people you could ever see yourself hanging out with outside of this particular transaction. Others may be people with whom you have a lot in common. You may find that there's a "simpatico" there. IMO the more you think about WHY you're seeking out this experience, the clearer you'll be about HAVING the experience, and the better able you will be to put your time with an SP or MA into the context of the rest of your life. I hope some of that makes sense. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bcguy42 38594 Report post Posted November 6, 2012 I am married and love my wife and I am looking for a different sexual experience and not a new romance. Is it possible to keep those seperated?. Yes, it is possible to keep sex and romance separated. The question is this - in your worldview, are these two things, sex and romance, very much entwined or are they two separate things? If they are very strongly linked, my prediction is that you will find you have issues as you hobby. You will have a fantastic sexual experience with someone who you find charming to be around and who seems very interested in you. If you are conditioned to see this as the beginning of a romance, this will be a problem. If you can keep a clear understanding that this was great sex with a wonderful person who sees you as a client, maybe as a friend eventually, but always as a client, you'll do fine. My suggestion is that this is something that needs to be sorted out before you jump into the deep end. Just keep in mind that you are looking at something that ultimately effects three people - you, your SO, and your provider. Welcome aboard and, if your decision is such, happy "pooning"! :) 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hmushman 512 Report post Posted November 6, 2012 First of all, thank you all for all of the great advice. I am really glad to have a place to ask the questions on my mind without worrying about being judged. My thoughts on this were that love and sex can be intertwined at times and other times sex is just sex. That is what I'm looking for, a great sexual experience. An experience where I can treat myself and forget about all of life's daily stressors. Like I said, I'm not looking for love. In my mind all of this made sense but I was still hesitant an a little nervous and wasn't sure why. Miss Sophia, thank you very much for the female's perspective. I will continue to be a husband to my SO. I'm wondering if it will make me better because I won't have those lingering urges which may interfere with our relationship. Thank you again Contraman and bcguy42 for sharing your experience and advice also. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frank7 3939 Report post Posted November 7, 2012 The SP won't have any problems separating sex and romance (and work) I reall doubt many SP falls for their client, and if they do, i'm sure they understand that half of them are probably not interested/taken. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted November 7, 2012 Really only you know whether you can keep the love for your wife and sex without romance with an escort separate. Every individual is different But, as has been mentioned, do things to keep this lifestyle discrete. A disposable cell phone, which you don't take home, a separate account (maybe only cash only) definitely no credit cards, don't change your home behaviour, use your own soaps etc. One more thing. I see you are in the USA. If you plan to see escorts in the US, keep in mind for the most part it is an illegal (criminal) activity down there, and you may risk arrest. Also escorts in the United States, from my understanding, for the most part, require verification (your full real name, reference, phone etc) I personally support verification, but are you comfortable in your situation providing such information to a lady Whatever you decide, good luck RG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hmushman 512 Report post Posted November 7, 2012 Hi roamingguy, I do live in the US but I live very close to Canada and would travel. I would never try it here because of the legal factor. Thank you for looking out for me though. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
percyvall65 110 Report post Posted November 9, 2012 Lots of SPs have a web site with an email address so you can communicate that way. Set up a hotmail or gmail email account with a password so the risk is less. Also, you can access it from any computer. Some SPs want you to put in writing what it is you want. If a phone number is required for contact, use a public pay phone (until they are no longer available). Percy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Phaedrus 209521 Report post Posted November 9, 2012 (edited) I am married and love my wife and I am looking for a different sexual experience and not a new romance. Is it possible to keep those seperated? I'd have thought this was one of the main reasons to see a SP (rather than, say having an affair). She'll never ask you when you're leaving your wife for her. And rest assured... even if you can't keep sex and romance separate, she almost certainly can :) Edited November 11, 2012 by Phaedrus typo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hmushman 512 Report post Posted November 10, 2012 That was my thought process. I know it's still cheating but I believe having an affair is worse. With an affair you are cheating with your heart and body and I don't want that. Sometimes I feel like I am distorting logic to get what I want. Does that make sense? 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DukeSSk 3430 Report post Posted November 10, 2012 Lots of SPs have a web site with an email address so you can communicate that way. Set up a hotmail or gmail email account with a password so the risk is less. Also, you can access it from any computer.Some SPs want you to put in writing what it is you want. If a phone number is required for contact, use a public pay phone (until they are no longer available). Percy I've seen many advertisements saying not to call from a pay phone or private/blocked number. There's a thread somewhere with tips on how not to get caught, a good piece of advice was to get a different SIM card, pre-paid phone or a disposable phone... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hmushman 512 Report post Posted November 13, 2012 Yep, the more I look around the site the more great information I find. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bcguy42 38594 Report post Posted November 21, 2012 I just ran across a tweet from @miilkkk that is germane to this discussion: Sex without love is like ice cream without sprinkles. Still fucking awesome! (Side note: if your are not following @miilkkk you are missing some of the best humor in the twitterverse.) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
