Valuable Information Prior to Visiting a Service Provider (Samantha's impatient rant)

[SamanthaEvans 166766]

This morning while I drink my coffee and read the boards here, I?m struck by how many complaints we have about the guys who take advantage of some aspect of our services and then treat us badly. There are active discussions about men who:

 

• Try to negotiate or bargain clearly-stated non-negotiable fees
  
• Try to pay less than the agreed fee after they arrive
  
• Try to get services that were not agreed on before the date
  
• Complain about our screening questions
  
• Don?t bother to take a shower, brush their teeth or trim their nails before seeing us
  
• Assume that we're likely to rob them
  
• Threaten to write bad reviews and/or aren?t believed when they write good ones
  
• Insult us, our need for safety and even our looks when we don?t give in to what they demand
  

No one is forced to read our ads and websites, look at our photos, contact us, discuss our services with us, or meet with us. It?s all voluntary and initiated by the client. The client has needs, feelings, preferences and curiosity, but why do so many refuse to take responsibility for themselves? What they express as anger, self-righteous indignation and personal entitlement is really projected self-hatred.

I want to sit these men down and say:

 

1. If you don?t want to see a paid companion, don?t do it.
   
2. If you decide to seek out a companion, that's your decision.
   
3. What you want is not what everyone else may want. That?s usually a wonderful thing.
   
4. Recognize that we?re not like cheap candy that you can buy daily. We?re more like fine dining to be enjoyed occasionally. Plan accordingly.
   
5. If someone?s prices are too high for you, either wait until you can afford her, or find someone else. Meanwhile, don't blame her for your lack of funds. Recognize that she charges what the market will bear. That means that there are plenty of others who can afford to see her.
   
   
6. Always be polite and considerate. No matter what. Even if you feel confused, disappointed or insulted, be polite.
   
7. Remember that companions are human beings, just like you. We have needs, desires, dreams and things we?re worried about or afraid of, just as you do.
   
8. We will protect both your health and our own. Fair is fair.
   
9. If you're worried about your safety, know that she's concerned about her safety, too. No matter who or how important you are or think you are, the one who is taking the most risks is always the companion. Always.
   
   
10. Relax.
    

[fortunateone 156618]

This would be a perfect post on that board that rhymes with cerb but starts with P.

 

I would add:

 

1. I get that you don't appreciate the sensational sensations of the r&t, but don't put down or belittle the guys who do & who post their reviews. Frankly it makes you look like a cheapo jackass when you say he's an idiot for spending 180/hr for r&t instead of getting micro fs for 120/45.

 

2. I get that you like bbbjs, but I don't want to hear about how it is zero risk for both parties again and again when it has been confirmed by the Health Nurse that it is high risk for the sp. Let it go, and leave it alone, instead of trying to coerce the sp in a review who only does cbjs that their biz will suffer because of that. It won't.

 

3. Leave your two cents out of an sps ad. She paid to be there, you didn't, and posting IN her ad that you don't think she is worth the rates she is charging, or can't possibly look like her pictures, makes you a jackass.

 

4. Learn what to look for in an ad. Learn what to ask for when contacting the sp. If you don't do either of this, learn not to complain when you don't get everything you assumed.

 

5. Go to have a good time; go in with a good attitude. Sps respond better to a smile and a thank you than they do to arrogance or questions about their health or latest std checkup.

[canadian28 100]

Thats makes sense, if I was a hot chick, I would screen horney guys too. and not taking a shower thats disgusting, if I was a chick I would like say get out here your sick. Go get a hooker on sixith street. OR pay the dirty surcharge.:-D

 

Now everyone should get a deal why charge so much for a HJ and massage. you can get a massage for $65 and hour why not HJ for $110 thats if it does not take to long, I would think a massage is more work then a HJ anyways.:twisted:

[Athana dos Santos 966]

Samantha,

 

I couldn't agree more with your post/thread!

 

I would like to add...

 

Don't masturbate before a session with an SP, we're not ignorant... it shows and smells! We won't throw you out if you cum in 5 mins (msog, gentlemen)

 

Cheers;

 

Athana xxx

[fortunateone 156618]

Thats makes sense, if I was a hot chick, I would screen horney guys too. and not taking a shower thats disgusting, if I was a chick I would like say get out here your sick. Go get a hooker on sixith street. OR pay the dirty surcharge.:-D

 

Now everyone should get a deal why charge so much for a HJ and massage. you can get a massage for $65 and hour why not HJ for $110 thats if it does not take to long, I would think a massage is more work then a HJ anyways.:twisted:

 

A good r&t takes as much time, care and attention to detail as any fs. A good hj is not a jerky 30 second-are-you-done-yet experience. A good r&t approaches tantric longer encounters, includes a massage that is either or approaches certified and is normally preferred by those who can't or don't want fs, or bjs for that matter. A good r&t provider (out west anyway) is worth her weight in gold and a rare individual as r&ts are not commonplace in this area.

 

And, of course, the point of me mentioning it was that guys who think it doesn't deserve a higher cost will post something like the above even tho they have no intention of experiencing r&ts, but the end result is that those who do enjoy them feel funny about posting their experiences. The result is that r&t guys are rarely able to read reviews about r&t providers without having to wade thru a lot of price point comments lol. (I mean, of course, in the unlikely event that a review is even posted, since the r&t guys can anticipate the negative reactions).

[Annessa 22743]

this is a really good thread Samantha.

 

there are indeed times I want to ask (and have!) some men I see "you're new at this aren't you?", when it continues with a timid chuckle and "yeah I guess I am", the date continues....if the comment is returned with an arrogant tone, I have never had a problem hanging up or walking out the door

 

love the food comparison too...very ofter you hear a man on the boards commenting on "the fine dining he sampled in _insert city_" rarely do you hear him traveling to that city in search of penny-candies ;)

[etasman2000 15994]

love the food comparison too...very ofter you hear a man on the boards commenting on "the fine dining he sampled in _insert city_" rarely do you hear him traveling to that city in search of penny-candies ;)

 

*ouch* I am well known within the company as a cheap-foodie when I travel, targeting the corner Indian/Chinese/Lebanese restaurant regardless of which country I am in.

 

Of course one countermeasure is to take an SP out on a dinner date ;-)

 

And yes I do agree on each bullet point of Samantha's rant.

[buggernot 588]

This stuff does get talked about a lot here, and I really sympathize with all the ladies for the crap they have to deal with. But unfortunately, it's just not the SP's it is all women in general. Every female I have ever spoken with has had a gaggle of tales about creepy or disrespectful or disgusting men that they've had to deal with in bars, at work, standing at the bus stop or even walking in public.

 

There's too many people out there that have no concept of respect or are just plain dumb. Some of the SP's are guilty of this - present company excluded I'm sure - and maybe some of the ok fellas out there have had a few bad experiences which leaves them untrusting or have had that negative prostitute stereotype driven into their psyche that they're all about the money and the service is poor.

 

You girls shouldn't have to deal with any of this shit, but it will come as part of the job I'm sorry to say. You'll have just as much success bemoaning the amount of horrific drivers on the road by going to the Licensing Bureau and screaming at everyone to learn to drive.

[whatsup 11893]

This stuff does get talked about a lot here, and I really sympathize with all the ladies for the crap they have to deal with. But unfortunately, it's just not the SP's it is all women in general. Every female I have ever spoken with has had a gaggle of tales about creepy or disrespectful or disgusting men that they've had to deal with in bars, at work, standing at the bus stop or even walking in public.

 

There's too many people out there that have no concept of respect or are just plain dumb. Some of the SP's are guilty of this - present company excluded I'm sure - and maybe some of the ok fellas out there have had a few bad experiences which leaves them untrusting or have had that negative prostitute stereotype driven into their psyche that they're all about the money and the service is poor.

 

You girls shouldn't have to deal with any of this shit, but it will come as part of the job I'm sorry to say. You'll have just as much success bemoaning the amount of horrific drivers on the road by going to the Licensing Bureau and screaming at everyone to learn to drive.

 

Buggernot, Great summation.

[Annessa 22743]

*ouch* I am well known within the company as a cheap-foodie when I travel, targeting the corner Indian/Chinese/Lebanese restaurant regardless of which country I am in.

 

that was a sarcastic avoidance of the metaphor I'm assuming?

 

or are you famous with the company of picking up 'corner cuisine"? lol

 

;)

[etasman2000 15994]

that was a sarcastic avoidance of the metaphor I'm assuming?

 

or are you famous with the company of picking up 'corner cuisine"? lol

 

;)

 

lol....i spend little on meals when i travel alone. most of the cheap restaurants anywhere in the world then to be Chinese/Indian/Lebanese. and yes i did mean actual food.

 

'corner cuisine' i pass on. not worth the risk!

[Tigerclaw 248]

This morning while I drink my coffee and read the boards here, I?m struck by how many complaints we have about the guys who take advantage of some aspect of our services and then treat us badly. There are active discussions about men who: ...

 

[*]Always be polite and considerate. No matter what. Even if you feel confused, disappointed or insulted, be polite.

[*]Remember that companions are human beings, just like you. We have needs, desires, dreams and things we?re worried about or afraid of, just as you do.

[*]We will protect both your health and our own. Fair is fair.

[*]If you're worried about your safety, know that she's concerned about her safety, too. No matter who or how important you are or think you are, the one who is taking the most risks is always the companion. Always.

[*]Relax.

 

Dear Samantha,

 

Your concerns, and that of other recent posts, are very disconcerting.

 

At this level these concerns should only be an anomaly and not of a regular occurrence. I fear that this thread and it's message may become lost in time.

 

-Advice for Gentlemen ... A "Do Not Do" List

http://cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=11288

-A heartfelt letter to a creepy client ....

http://cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=11601

 

 

Might I suggest, (with feedback), that all of the major concerns be consolidated and presented as a permanent post that would appear on the "Newbies Rule and Regulations section". There should be the availability for Providers to work with Mod to update the list as new concerns become apparent.

 

Further, might I suggest that the first line within the Cerb window, on sites such as Escorts-Canada, have a "Read Before Contacting Service/Experience Providers", where as the link would bring them to the Newbie section with a post that might be called: "Valuable Information Prior to Contacting Provider". There could be a section on Grooming, Contact, Do's, Do Not's, etc. We still have Newbies making inquiries that could well be answered by a thread such as suggested.

 

I know that I first discovered Escorts-Canada prior to accidently discovering "Cerb". For me it started with the list of acronyms and then I discovered the wealth of information that has led me to wonderful experiences and a wonderful community.

 

Tigerclaw

[Suzirider 737]

Might I suggest, (with feedback), that all of the major concerns be consolidated and presented as a permanent post that would appear on the "Newbies Rule and Regulations section". There should be the availability for Providers to work with Mod to update the list as new concerns become apparent.

 

Further, might I suggest that the first line within the Cerb window, on sites such as Escorts-Canada, have a "Read Before Contacting Service/Experience Providers", where as the link would bring them to the Newbie section with a post that might be called: "Valuable Information Prior to Contacting Provider". There could be a section on Grooming, Contact, Do's, Do Not's, etc. We still have Newbies making inquiries that could well be answered by a thread such as suggested.

 

Tigerclaw

 

This is essentially the intent of my first post.

Sometimes a problem is solved (or at least narrowed down) by someone looking (a few steps back) at the whole picture (perspective).

Some here will probably think, I know it all, cant tell me anything new. Sometimes things change !

How much of a submission would it be to say, "I read/subsribe to the Newbie threads" (and can prove it), in my profile or signature ?

(check mine) :-|

[PistolPete 61421]

I agree with what is being said here in this thread, these issues were kicked around by SP's and hobbiest, it was all started by our very own Cat..aka Catherine of Canada, some other quality points in the thread. I miss her around here!

here is the thread..

http://cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=4370

[SamanthaEvans 166766]

Thank you all for your participation in and contributions to this thread. That we can have a sensible discussion about things that affect all of us is one of the very best things about CERB.

 

However, I must say, with all due respect, friends, that if everyone really knew the things we've pointed out here and elsewhere, a lot of the discussions I was grumbling about wouldn't happen, or perhaps wouldn't be so long and involved.

 

For example, with no offense meant to anyone, I'd like to point to the discussion about what a client should do with his wallet when he visits a companion. Everyone should be careful with their valuables wherever they are. That's axiomatic, I think. But the long discussion in that thread largely revolves around the false assumptions that not only is the client the one who has the most to lose and who is at greatest risk when he sees a companion, but also that companions are likely to be thieves. Unsubstantiated, anonymously-made allegations about unnamed companions are cited as evidence or proof that the concern is legitimate and pressing.

 

Of course, not everyone is honest. It's true that some people may not resist the temptation to take what doesn't belong to them, given the chance. It's also true that people are sometimes negligent and misplace things, even though they're sure they haven't. (I've returned a couple of watches and a cell phone in the last few weeks.)

 

Maybe some of the suspicion and at times thinly-veiled hostility that runs through the threads I've referred to is a product of a society that considers sex to be wrong, dirty or sinful. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that most of our clients are married men and quite a few of them feel guilty about what they're up to. It could be something else.

 

My point is that I'm not really preaching to the choir. These topics are under discussion because some of us need to report on the things that have happened to us, often with clients whom we've screened the best ways we know. On the other side, clients also want to report experiences they've had where they felt they didn't get what they expected. If we all had the same expectations and assumptions, our experiences would be more alike and we'd have less to complain about.

[Tigerclaw 248]

I agree with what is being said here in this thread, these issues were kicked around by SP's and hobbiest, it was all started by our very own Cat..aka Catherine of Canada, some other quality points in the thread. I miss her around here!

here is the thread..

http://cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=4370

 

Thanks PistolPete for resurrecting this thread.

 

This speaks more to my earlier assertion that valuable threads can become lost in time yet the benefits should always be visible and accessible to all.

 

Tigerclaw

[Tigerclaw 248]

Thank you all for your participation in and contributions to this thread. That we can have a sensible discussion about things that affect all of us is one of the very best things about CERB.

 

However, I must say, with all due respect, friends, that if everyone really knew the things we've pointed out here and elsewhere, a lot of the discussions I was grumbling about wouldn't happen, or perhaps wouldn't be so long and involved...

 

...My point is that I'm not really preaching to the choir. These topics are under discussion because some of us need to report on the things that have happened to us, often with clients whom we've screened the best ways we know. On the other side, clients also want to report experiences they've had where they felt they didn't get what they expected. If we all had the same expectations and assumptions, our experiences would be more alike and we'd have less to complain about.

 

Dear Samantha,

 

Thank-you for taking the time and energy to make us aware of some of the challenges that you have recently encountered, and of which has allowed others to disclose their challenges.

 

What is evident from the discussions is that there is a need to develop more awareness that perhaps could mitigate the majority of the common challenges. (Reality would dictate, but not all.)

 

Would you be in favor of a "One-Stop Information Section", as suggested?

 

Furthermore, perhaps the initial draft could be developed within the Providers only section. The draft could than be presented to the hobbiest for comment with the final version posted permanently for everyones benefit.

 

And if I may, further suggest, that the link be made available to Providers to add to their personal advertisement page.

 

I welcome your comment(s).

 

Tigerclaw

[SamanthaEvans 166766]

Would you be in favor of a "One-Stop Information Section", as suggested?

 

Furthermore, perhaps the initial draft could be developed within the Providers only section. The draft could than be presented to the hobbiest for comment with the final version posted permanently for everyones benefit.

 

And if I may, further suggest, that the link be made available to Providers to add to their personal advertisement page.

 

I think it's a good idea, Tigerclaw. There are several ways to do it, I'm sure.

 

I'm taking a few days off--a real holiday for a change! I will think about this while I'm gone.

 

Mod's opinion is important, too, of course! What do you think, Mod?

[Tigerclaw 248]

I think it's a good idea, Tigerclaw. There are several ways to do it, I'm sure.

 

I'm taking a few days off--a real holiday for a change! I will think about this while I'm gone.

 

Mod's opinion is important, too, of course! What do you think, Mod?

 

Dearest Samantha,

 

Your blessing was necessary to proceed further...thanks.

 

Yes, Mod's input, thoughts and reflections is the next step.

 

Enjoy your time off...

 

Tigerclaw

[coachg 388]

Great thread Samantha....it is the ignorant jerks out there who ruin it for the decent and respectful guys that are out there......the ladies certainly do not deserve all the bs and crap they get from guys like that. Send them packing and hopefully the next call is from one of the decent ones out there. Have a fantastic holiday.

[capitalman 3861]

Samantha your post deserved the TOTF award! Good for you!

[SamanthaEvans 166766]

Thanks, everyone!

[mod 135639]

Mod's opinion is important, too, of course! What do you think, Mod?

 

Sorry for the delay in response on this. Tigerclaw brought it to my attention with some excellent idea's. Tigerclaw suggests a permanent "Sticky" thread in the newbie section with "Valuable Information Prior to Visiting a Service Provider" (a general "do's and don'ts").

 

I agree this is a good idea so I will create a thread in the newbies section called "Valuable Information Prior to Visiting a Service Provider" and anyone who wishes to add to the information can do so.

[mod 135639]

Tips and do's and don'ts

 

Feel free to add to this.

[LazeyGeorge 768]

Thank you :)

I think what you have said is valuable to everyone and for all situations.

 

नमस्ते (Namaste) "I respect divinity within you that is also within me."