Sending a text just saying 'hi'

[Cleo Catra 178382]

Pretty much every day, I'll receive a few texts from numbers I've never seen before, just saying 'hi' or, 'hey'.

 

I will never understand why these texts are sent. Most girls ignore them, to be honest. I occasionally will respond, saying 'Hello! If you'd like to see me, please introduce yourself and let me know what you're looking for, thanks!'

 

other times I've said 'Hello! Who is this?', to get a response back with just a name. Like, Frank. Just Frank, nothing else. Not, Hello, this is Frank, wondering if you're available today?'

 

I know sometimes a new client can be nervous with the first communciation. But please keep in mind, we are very happy to answer your questions, and if we accept texts (some girls state in their ads that they do not), then you are welcome to text us! But please, ask a question! Tell me what you're texting for. Because to just say 'Hi, then 'Frank', it's like pulling teeth. I'm not here to draw what you want out of you. You need to ask me, and then we can make an arrangement.

 

I will admit, I sometimes can be a bit snarky in my responses to these texts. And i'm not a snarky person. But after the tenth 'Hey' or worse, 'hey babe', text I've received in a day, my patience may have hit it's limit. And I would hate for us not to get a chance to meet only because our texting didn't work out.

 

Communication is key to a good encounter. Tell me who you are, and what it is you're looking for by contacting me. If you can't say more than a hello in a text, now how will we be able to talk in purrson silly!

[Hoppinhorny 1219]

I think that goes for everyone, but totally understand/agree how it would be much more of an annoyance for you ladies. How can you provide anything without knowing the wants first? :)

[aimtoplease1 1839]

I think it's a guy thing...I'm not sure why but some days when I'm looking at the ladies on here & get the urge to just say Hi because I like them. I sometimes say that to a woman in a bar or reataurant. I don't say anymore because I can't start anything but for some reason I feel the need to say Hi. I don't like Hey or Hey babe...even worse. If I say Hi to anyone on here it's by PM...I don't own a cell phone. I can see it being a pain for the SP's because it's hard to tell if the person is trying to set something up or not. Im not trying to be a smart ass but I would say Hi to you.

[SexxxyRebecca 57989]

.. Or even worse when some guys cant even say hello but just send a one liner like "Available? Rate? Location?"

 

Please, guys, make a full sentence! lol ;)

[fortunateone 156618]

So glad i don't have texting. I am on 2 sites that have IM style chat options, where clients bombard you with one or two words opening a chat box the second you appear online.

 

Feedback from most sps is they ignore, disable or dislike the chat feature as an option used by complete time wasters who don't even bother to visit our profiles let alone read our ad. They see the name pop up as 'online' and bam, "Hi". or "hello" or something vague, and if you do reply with a link to your ad, they say nothing, if you ask if they saw the profile, they either don't respond or they say 'no'. I think one in 20 said first they read my ad, then started the chat.

 

 

If I am being contacted, the first thing I want to know is what is this about, and what do you know about me before we get started. Whether a phone call, a text, an email, or an IM chat on an ad site.

[Phaedrus 209521]

.. Or even worse when some guys cant even say hello but just send a one liner like "Available? Rate? Location?"

 

I guess the answer is "No. n/a. n/a." :)

[cat 262460]

I think it's a guy thing...I'm not sure why but some days when I'm looking at the ladies on here & get the urge to just say Hi because I like them. I sometimes say that to a woman in a bar or reataurant. I don't say anymore because I can't start anything but for some reason I feel the need to say Hi. I don't like Hey or Hey babe...even worse. If I say Hi to anyone on here it's by PM...I don't own a cell phone. I can see it being a pain for the SP's because it's hard to tell if the person is trying to set something up or not. Im not trying to be a smart ass but I would say Hi to you.

 

I receive PMs from board members saying hi but most of them introduce themselves and let me know they aren't looking to pursue an appointment, they just wanted to say hello. I never have an issue with that. The ones that say "hi" or "hello" only are a mystery because I don't know if you want to open a dialogue on business or if it's a friendly hello. The easiest way to clarify is to introduce yourself and say why you are contacting me, then I know if I need to send you an introduction or just say hi back. It's important to remember this is our livelyhood and while we are a very friendly bunch, time is of the essence and sorting thru the waste of times to find the ones that are going to book an appointment is time consuming and frustrating if we have to painfully extract the nature of the communication. We don't mind a nice "hello" or "hi" if its couched with the reason behind it...

cat

[Cleo Catra 178382]

We don't mind a nice "hello" or "hi" if its couched with the reason behind it...

 

cat

 

Exactly! I am always flattered by a nice text just saying 'Hello, just wanted to say hi, love your ads', or something like that. It's the one word 'hi' texts that my post is about. A friendly hello is always welcomed :)

[aimtoplease1 1839]

Ok...thanks. I have a better understanding now & I do agree 100%. You ladies are great!!

[Guest ***t***iv***]

I am always happy to hear from someone I saw last night or haven't seen in a while or even who I have only chatted with on here and not had the pleasure of meeting for whatever reason. The key word is 'hear'. If you PM me and only say hi, that isn't really a message at all is it? at least, I didn't hear a message or question or introduction or a lead in to a discussion or anything. like, what do you say back to that anyway? hi back? what a WOT.

 

people say hi to me in the grocery isle all the time, I don't stop and inquire about why they chose to say hello to me or if there is anything I can do for them! I might smile and nod, then just pass them by. hint hint guys.

 

Form a complete sentence unless you want to get passed by.

We know you can, and we are always most grateful and most responsive when you do. So please do:) Do it for us, we are all worth it! and your own efforts will be rewarded, too ;)

after all, good conversation leads to other good things

[mister_crufty 4891]

--snip--

after the tenth 'Hey' or worse, 'hey babe', text I've received in a day, my patience may have hit it's limit.

--snip--

 

Hey babe...how YOU doin'?

 

:-D

 

--ducks--

[Reddog2402 2221]

Speaking from experience, I know when I first started in the hobby, I found it very difficult to pick up the phone and call a service provider. Being a bit shy, it often took me a while to build up the courage to take that first step.

 

Once I discovered CERB, it was a lot easier - I could use a PM to make that first contact and have a bit of back-and-forth correspondence with a lady. Sometimes it leads to an encounter, sometimes it doesnt. But it should still be polite and friendly.

 

I'm thinking some of these one-liners might be on the shy side, and unsure what to say or how to open up the lines of communication. "Hi" might be all they can manage with the first contact.

 

That being said, those that send out the "Available? Rate? Location?" texts or PMs simply lack class and respect! It's so easy to read a lady's ad, profile and/or website, find their preferred means of communicating, and touch base accordingly.

[budski 225]

I do feel funny texting. It's so informal, and I don't really know what to say right off the bat. The few times I've done it, I say "Hi, I saw your post on cerb. Hopeing we can set something up"... or something similar. Is that good etiquette?

 

But I'm not one of the 'hi' texters either.

[bcguy42 38594]

When I run across a thread like this I just want to find the nearest wall and bash my head against it a few times.

 

Guys - this is not rocket science! When you contact someone, generally you want something. Being as how the number of certified mind readers is demonstrably low, you need to verbalize a bit.

 

If you are contacting a provider, that narrows things down a bit regarding what you want. But you still have to expand on "Hi."

 

If you are a "Hi." guy or, to me, worse, an "Available? Rate? Location?" guy, pretend you are a grownup and, state, in complete sentences (noun and verb - adjectives optional), what you really want to say.

 

I guarantee your life will be much better. As will the women's.

[cmo25 110]

Thanks for the info. I feel like I never know how to start the conversation worth someone new. By a simple introduction makes sense :)

[Meaghan McLeod 179664]

When someone just texts "hi", I never know if they misdialed or what. When they add something like, "saw your ad" or "are you available?", it lets me know they are calling me. I do get text's sometimes that the person texting me has misdialed. Got a text once that went like this "Hey dude, do you know if Mike is a smoker?" Of course, I sent a reply back "you have the wrong number" and he replied "who's this?". I had to reply back "I don't know you and don't know Mike". He then said "thanks Mate". So, it really helps if you say more then just "hi". What am I supposed to respond to? "How are you?" "good". Its like pulling teeth!

[roamingguy 300292]

Instead of an out of the blue text you can always contact the lady by signing her Guestbook on CERB or PM her...something a little less anonymous

Texting, unless you identify yourself, is anonymous, and who wants to be anonymously contacted for no apparent reason

RG

[IsaMassage 54318]

I was ok with the HI text from guys I have never met.., I am jsut so easy going... but to be honest recently I have started to be a bit more "rude" and cut off.., for the simple reason that is not only sayin hi, today, but tomorrow, the day after, and the day after that, you have already given yoir rates explained what u do and after trying to be friendly and polite.. You get guys that want to meet you for lunch, a drink, dinner or coffee.. Really? Even after you say no, they keep going, hi every day.. You even stop answering any texts from this number, next thing you get is empty txts.. Really?? And next is ... What did I do why don't you answer? What did I do? Really??? It just makes me shake my head... Wtf??? And keeps going for months....

[Guest Ot**w***og****n]

I'm not fond of texting as I prefer to initiate first contact by PM or by email if permitted/required then follow up by phone. I don't mind calling for first contact. More often than not you can tell if you will hit it off together and ladies can screen as need be. I get some strange text messages myself from time to time and chock them up to wrong numbers or whackos. LOL

[Wolf Knight 29667]

Personally, I hate texting/BBM for anything other than informal stuff like "grab some milk on the way home". However I always try to contact an SP via her preferred method and if she says that's text I'll follow her instructions (I don't want to turn her off by failing to follow simple instructions to which there have been dedicated threads and rants here on CERB:).

 

There have been a couple of SP's that I have desired to set up an appointment with who stated their preferred method of contact as being text and after writing a absurdly long introductry text including all the required information and sending it off to the "right number" with "wishing to make an appointment" in the subject line, I wait. I wait. I wait (days). Nothing! So I assume she's too busy or not interested and move on to another provider. To send a second message feels like begging /pleading and I don't do that for anyone (not being snarky but thats just my personality).

 

So after all that, now I find out that my genuine appointment setting got lost in the mass of junk texts with "Hi". Good god people we're not in grade three.

[Nicolette Vaughn 294340]

I'm okay with the "Hi" text but please don't text me at 1 am after you have woken me up. You really want to think I'm going to carry on a convo half asleep and pissed off? This happened last night and took me forever to go back to sleep even though I had the phone on silent. I could hear the vibration where it was charging on the floor.

 

If you're texting me "Hi", please ask if it's the lady you're look for and then get straight to the point if you have questions or would like to book an appt.. I don't mean this in a rude way but sometimes we are doing other things and contrary to what some people might believe, we don't sit around looking pretty all day waiting for someone to call us.

 

I don't like each individual text of "Do you offer this?" and then 10 other texts with a laundry list of services. This is so time consuming you just may as well call me but some guys just do this to waste an SP's time. Then those guys are branded as a WOT in my eyes. For those who actually do want an appt, just getting to the point is the best way.

[LeeRichards 177238]

.............

[Cleo Catra 178382]

I know that I have been guilty of it in the past, mostly because of not knowing how to go about setting a conversation into play, and also because of being nervous and hoping that the lovely lady would take care of or say the rest of the things that I was to afraid to say. Knowing what I know now makes me feel a bit foolish for doing so, but I guess it was sort of the best I was capable of doing at that point when so very new to all of this. I was, and at times can still be intimidated by women like yourselves that are so forward, so gorgeous, and so confident that I get smitten and you be tied, and sometimes can use a bit of assistance in helping to ease my fears and insecurities and help the conversation move forward so we both stand to gain from speaking. ;)

 

No need to feel foolish! Hopefully you always got responses to those texts and the conversations did carry forward for you :)

 

I personally have decided to start responding to every text that just does say 'hi', nothing else, with a standard response saying 'Hello! Please introduce yourself and let me know what you're looking for, thanks!. Unfortunately though, more than half the time no response comes back. I think this is why the 'hi' texts can be so off-putting at first - because even when we DO respond, nothing comes back. I guess maybe it's just nerves? Who knows!

[futileresistenz 28253]

This also baffles me. So far, I've never booked via text and always do so via introductory email and it's worked out very well for me.

 

I suppose it could be nerves, feeling intimidated, or just the incapacity to deal with five words or more at once. ;) ["Monkey brain"] Or it is a desire to make a connection over a period of many hours (even days!) with your intended 'target' via a ping-pong game of short text 'blurts' fired back and forth. Just a hare-brained thought. Or is it monkey brain? But consider this: The lady in question may just get a little frustrated with aimless texting, and most likely would rather be meeting with you (or another booking client) than waste time trying to figure out what it is that you are after.

 

Guys/Gents: If you'll permit a little piece of advice, when you do text that lovely lady, make it just long enough beyond the 'Hi!' to let her know what you want! You may not be quite ready to book and have a question. It doesn't hurt to give her a compliment by saying why you chose to contact specifically her and not someone else. This is likely to flatter her and lead to more interest on her part to continue the conversation. Ask any question you might have, but have some respect. Questions like "Can I just pound you for the full hour?" are likely going to put her off you altogether.

For a large part of this audience I am preaching to the choir, but just doing my community duty to advise those new to this board or who might be unsure about booking their first encounter. There are many threads here that cover topics just like this one. It is a gold mine if you just look.

 

Now go forth, educate, book and conjugate! :)

 

[tbc]

[Wolf Knight 29667]

These days people have a SEVEAR problem with expecting immediacy in response to texts. This is in large part to iMessage and BBM which shows if the text is delivered and read. Additionally, people are quickly forgetting to use proper communication language, punctuation and diction. Even with PM's here on CERB there is an expectation of response due to the fact that we can see if the person is logged on or the last time they were on (they are "on" why haven't they responded?).

 

I have been known to send comments to ladies here on Cerb letting them know that I appreciated the cleverness of their ad or the thoughtfulness of a post they made. I do this because I believe that people generally like to be appreciated and have their contributions/efforts recognized. However, I usually specifically let the lady know that no response is required that my message is just a "kudo's".

 

If a ladies preferred method of communication/appointments is text for her business then that's what it should be used for "business" not "bull shit". Seriously, my preferred method of business communication is email and if I received emails daily just saying "hi" I'd so block those senders right away. People just use common sense (I wish it actually was more common) and use ladies business communication for business purposes. If you do just want to say "hi" at least follow it up with "Hi, no need to respond but I just wanted to say I love your tats" (since Cleo was the OP). That took me 5 seconds to type! The SP will know why you messaged and you won't waste her time.

 

I always prefer to use e-mail for my communication with ladies whenever possible so that the lady has the flexibility to respond in her own good time if a response is warranted.