jerican 657 Report post Posted June 11, 2009 I may rub some people the wrong way with this post and I am by no means a seasoned pro in this hobby but I have noticed a few things on this board since I joined and wanted to build a how to list based on my own views. Basically when dealing with life and business and people you develop certain interpersonal skills. On this board we are trying to make connections that are very intimate and should be handled with care and tact (imho). CERB is, as I have found, an excellent resource for quality companions and should not be treated like the side alley or even Craigs List. below is a list of tips in how I approach new people and felt I should share it as I see many impatient responses to announcements or weird ways of asking for information. Read their Announcements completely! Many times there is a link to the SP or MP's homepage, e-mail address or phone number. These announcements generally have availability, details and sometimes rates. Take the time to see what they are saying and decide if you want to contact them. If they have a webpage...READ IT, I have yet to visit an SP's page and not come away with a nearly complete idea of what they offer and their general rates. If they have recommendations, read them, and not just the 'score'. If you are looking for a certain type of experience the reco's usual will recount (sometimes vaguely) what is offered and what isn't. The list of services under the review header is generally pretty specific. Do a bit of research if you want to know what the SP/MP is like. A lot of the women who announce regularly also post regularly. Personally I only want to spend time with people I am interested in, by looking at what they have to say you can get a feel of their personality. If you click with someone then generally you can have a much better time. If you have specific questions do not post them under their announcement, PM, call or e-mail them depending on what information they provided. How would you book an appointment for anything else in life? If they are a regular poster on CERB they will see their PM's, many of the women even mention if they can't get to them and specify alternate methods. Do not post on their guestbook 'call me', 'are you available now' or 'PM me', if I was on the other end of those messages I would not respond or maybe not even see the notes for a while at a time. Be respectful in messages and notes. If you want to be treated well and meet some of the amazing women on this board approach them as they should be approached, with class and respect. I am not saying debate should never happen, but that is not the point of this board. I know I am a relative n00b so to speak so some may disagree with me or discount the advice but I felt I needed to get this off my chest. Anything I missed? Any comments from the SP's/MP's? From other hobbyists? I know there is a 'do not do' thread, but a concise how to guide could never hurt!;-) 17 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
antlerman 17064 Report post Posted June 11, 2009 nice post....should be mandatory read for newbs and chat lurkers....... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
canuckhooker 19203 Report post Posted June 11, 2009 Great ideas, but unfortunately my experience on the internet has been that the people who should 'read and heed' in any forum like this are blissfully ignorant, and too lazy to do a little work. I always do what was suggested in the initial post and I have yet to have had a bad experience or any unexpected surprises. In the old days of AOL and Compuserve this syndrome was called the "Me Too!" syndrome. The minute somebody gave out information, one person would ask the poster to send them more info, followed by an Avalanche of messages that only said "Me Too!" These people were for the most part lurkers who never contributed a thing to the forum. Just look what happens when someone posts some info on an SP like "Asian Connie" for example. (or the infamous CIM list on the other board) The freaking lurkers are in a frenzy like shark feeding time at the aquarium. Very few if any of them had ever contributed anything back to the community. My 2 cents. Probably not popluar with some folks but I don't really care. The people who will agree are the ones who make this place work. The one's who will be offended are the problem. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mr.Goldfinger 2287 Report post Posted June 11, 2009 Yep I agree . Good post ! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jerican 657 Report post Posted June 11, 2009 I agree it may not have a huge effect, especially considering it is a long read and I am saying read the info :) But if even a few people take the time and react differently on this board then potentially we can have a ripple effect. More courteous hobbyists = more SP's becoming active on CERB = better results for all of us. I love the fact that a lot of SP's give us their insight and share their views then I see some of them getting frustrated because of no-shows or sketchy responses. Being from Ottawa I want us to stop being the no-show capital of Canada! Plus when I see discourteous responses or issues with the few SP's I do know it just gets me steamed... Great ideas, but unfortunately my experience on the internet has been that the people who should 'read and heed' in any forum like this are blissfully ignorant, and too lazy to do a little work. I always do what was suggested in the initial post and I have yet to have had a bad experience or any unexpected surprises. In the old days of AOL and Compuserve this syndrome was called the "Me Too!" syndrome. The minute somebody gave out information, one person would ask the poster to send them more info, followed by an Avalanche of messages that only said "Me Too!" These people were for the most part lurkers who never contributed a thing to the forum. Just look what happens when someone posts some info on an SP like "Asian Connie" for example. (or the infamous CIM list on the other board) The freaking lurkers are in a frenzy like shark feeding time at the aquarium. Very few if any of them had ever contributed anything back to the community. My 2 cents. Probably not popluar with some folks but I don't really care. The people who will agree are the ones who make this place work. The one's who will be offended are the problem. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
drg23 124 Report post Posted June 11, 2009 haha, in response to what CH I work in the IT industry and its hilarious how many customers call us taking umbridge over something they agreed to without actually reading. I fear its the curse of the 80's children, in it for instant gratification. I shouldnt have much to say on this matter as I do fall into that demograph but I personally only have the time to see those who "Do it for me" and if that is best facilitated by a quick read then so be it. But I mean come on,its not like reviewing a 20 page EULA (End-User-Licensing-Agreement), most of these ladies websites are both tasteful and sexy, I would love to spend all day "researching"them hehe. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Carrie Moon 68826 Report post Posted June 11, 2009 Even before the days of the internet.. people who are courteous are courteous or not regardless of how you tell them to behave.. common sense goes out the window with a lot of people and my thoughts are that you are probably preaching to the converted :) Guys who telephone and say 'how much?' or 'what's up?' rather than.. 'I saw your ad and was wondering please what are your rates and what are your restrictions or what are your hours'' are easily distinguished.. The former get a response such as.. 'please call another provider. I don't think we'll be a good match'' or usually just answering them with my rates throws them off because they are used to 80 dollar girls.. and move on or hang up on me quickly enough. hey.. just noticed.. this post 69 for me.. have to keep it there! These days however I only advertise on the net.. so it's annoying when someone calls to ask questions about rates/location and service when it's clearly spelled out on my site. Worse yet is when someone asks me for a description! I have photos dummy.. I know you looked at them..lol Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest f***2f*** Report post Posted June 11, 2009 Yeah the lurkers really give me a royal pain. It's just laziness. We've posted on this stuff before and they just don't read it so while it's all good and all it won't lessen the stupidity.:? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
slurp 7020 Report post Posted June 11, 2009 Every now and then I get tired of some of the boorish behaviour on this and other boards and will let 'er rip. If nothing else it makes one feel better knowing they tried. Sometimes the flak you catch might make you think i wasn't worth it but every now and then someone will throw a bone in the form of a thank you and that is nice. This is one of those bones, the mod might consider making your post a sticky and make all the newbies read it. When you get right down to it, all you've posted is plain common sense. Amazing how there isn't always enough of that to go around .... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
buggernot 588 Report post Posted June 11, 2009 I fear its the curse of the 80's children, in it for instant gratification. It's got more to do with ignorance, lack of courtesy and/or general stupidity. There has always been those kind of people and always will be. I would almost think that the more recent generation being educated from birth in the world of the internet would be used to actually looking for more information by default. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
drg23 124 Report post Posted June 11, 2009 It's got more to do with ignorance, lack of courtesy and/or general stupidity. There has always been those kind of people and always will be. I would almost think that the more recent generation being educated from birth in the world of the internet would be used to actually looking for more information by default. Very interesting point your raise BN, i am very curious to that answer as well. You may in fact be right. But on the other hand maybe the ease of a google search has deadened society to the point that anything extra is seen as too much effort. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
whatsup 11893 Report post Posted June 11, 2009 (edited) I may rub some people the wrong way with this post and I am by no means a seasoned pro in this hobby but I have noticed a few things on this board since I joined and wanted to build a how to list based on my own views. Basically when dealing with life and business and people you develop certain interpersonal skills. On this board we are trying to make connections that are very intimate and should be handled with care and tact (imho). CERB is, as I have found, an excellent resource for quality companions and should not be treated like the side alley or even Craigs List. below is a list of tips in how I approach new people and felt I should share it as I see many impatient responses to announcements or weird ways of asking for information. Read their Announcements completely! Many times there is a link to the SP or MP's homepage, e-mail address or phone number. These announcements generally have availability, details and sometimes rates. Take the time to see what they are saying and decide if you want to contact them. If they have a webpage...READ IT, I have yet to visit an SP's page and not come away with a nearly complete idea of what they offer and their general rates. If they have recommendations, read them, and not just the 'score'. If you are looking for a certain type of experience the reco's usual will recount (sometimes vaguely) what is offered and what isn't. The list of services under the review header is generally pretty specific. Do a bit of research if you want to know what the SP/MP is like. A lot of the women who announce regularly also post regularly. Personally I only want to spend time with people I am interested in, by looking at what they have to say you can get a feel of their personality. If you click with someone then generally you can have a much better time. If you have specific questions do not post them under their announcement, PM, call or e-mail them depending on what information they provided. How would you book an appointment for anything else in life? If they are a regular poster on CERB they will see their PM's, many of the women even mention if they can't get to them and specify alternate methods. Do not post on their guestbook 'call me', 'are you available now' or 'PM me', if I was on the other end of those messages I would not respond or maybe not even see the notes for a while at a time. Be respectful in messages and notes. If you want to be treated well and meet some of the amazing women on this board approach them as they should be approached, with class and respect. I am not saying debate should never happen, but that is not the point of this board. I know I am a relative n00b so to speak so some may disagree with me or discount the advice but I felt I needed to get this off my chest. Anything I missed? Any comments from the SP's/MP's? From other hobbyists? I know there is a 'do not do' thread, but a concise how to guide could never hurt!;-) Jerican, it is nice of you to take the time and effort to do a compilation of this information. In the past there has been many threads in regard to these subjects and it certainly would be beneficial to have this as a sticky in the newbie section. It would act as quick general guide for those new to the hobby. You are absolutely correct that a concise how to guide could never hurt. In addition ... The Search feature is such a valuable resource that will unearth a tremendous amount of useful information. Happy Hobbying ;-) Edited June 11, 2009 by whatsup In addition ... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miss Scarlett 25073 Report post Posted June 12, 2009 The biggest problem I find is that most people think ignorance is bliss, truth is they are just too lazy to do the research. Ignorance is not bliss in this situation, it is annoying! I think this is a great post, and newbies should be made to read it, but we all know that is not possible, so I fear this thread will not do what it was intended to do. From an SP prespective, thank you for trying though, maybe one person can make a difference!:-D WE HOPE! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Annessa 22743 Report post Posted June 13, 2009 Well put Jerican. I know you said your post was a big read, but really, it probably took all us readers about 3 mins at most to read. similarly it probably only takes double that to check up on posts, reviews or a website on a lady. The very thoght that taking an extra 10 mins of time could make or break a date should be enough motivation for all to toss laziness out the window *raises her coffe-mug up in the air to a true gentleman...online and in person * :-) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SamanthaEvans 166767 Report post Posted June 15, 2009 The very thoght that taking an extra 10 mins of time could make or break a date should be enough motivation for all to toss laziness out the window *raises her coffe-mug up in the air to a true gentleman...online and in person * :-) Absolutely! It always surprises me that, at the rates some of us charge, we get queries from guys who haven't really paid much attention to what they'll be getting for their investment. If I'm not worth the extra 10-15 minutes it takes to page through my website, why bother contacting me at all? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
a******s.m*****e 187 Report post Posted June 15, 2009 My "favourite" calls. I get them at least once a day or more. Me: Hello! Client: Are you available now? (no name, no greeting) Me: Who is this? Do I know you? (thinking this must be a regular standing at the corner ready to drop in) C: No, we haven't met yet. Me: How can I help you? C: I saw your ad. Me: Where did you see it? C: On the Internet. Me: Did you go to my website? C: Yes, nice pictures. Me: So, you know what I do and how much it is? C: No, I just looked at it shortly. Me: Then how are you so sure you want to see me right now if you don't know what I do and how much it is? C: You will tell me. Me: (Sighing, telling him about services and prices.) C: (silence. I can tell he is looking for the words "full service") Can you repeat that? Me: (repeat it exactly the same way) C: And how much for full service? Me: What makes you think I do full service? I advertise massages with HJ. C: (incredulously) You don't do sex? Me: (Depending on my mood here I tell him that next time he should read the website, give him shit for using explicit language on the phone or just hang up) I swear, I get these phone calls at regular intervals. It is like a script. :( Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Redseductress 9358 Report post Posted June 15, 2009 If only every guy could be a lil more like you Jerican :D Wouldnt hurt if they looked a little like you either ;) Very well said! I believe alot of guys (newbies) could really benifit from reading this! At the same time it really comes down to respect and unfortantley some guy just don't care, but thankfully they are the exact type I refuse to see. So at the same time I thank them for there ignorance as they saved me from what probably would have been a not so great experience. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jerican 657 Report post Posted June 15, 2009 (blushing) Thanks Red, and from personal experience it is their (great) loss if they miss out on a chance at seeing you due to a lack of common sense and respect. I will be honest your recent issue with no-shows is part of the reason I wrote this. If only every guy could be a lil more like you Jerican :D Wouldnt hurt if they looked a little like you either ;) Very well said! I believe alot of guys (newbies) could really benifit from reading this! At the same time it really comes down to respect and unfortantley some guy just don't care, but thankfully they are the exact type I refuse to see. So at the same time I thank them for there ignorance as they saved me from what probably would have been a not so great experience. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YoungStud 468 Report post Posted June 15, 2009 I swear, I get these phone calls at regular intervals. It is like a script. :( It is this kind of stuff that makes me think that not only is our educational system is almost totally failing us these days, our whole way of life may be in peril. (And I'm only partially kidding. Lol.) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SamanthaEvans 166767 Report post Posted June 15, 2009 It is this kind of stuff that makes me think that not only is our educational system is almost totally failing us these days, our whole way of life may be in peril. (And I'm only partially kidding. Lol.) I think you're right, YS. Mind, my experience is that it's mostly the younger guys who behave this way. Spoiled children is what a lot of them are. We told them they were so special, so important, that everything they do is nothing but the very best that could ever be done by anyone. They've got incredible self-esteem and lousy other-regard. They're entitled to have whatever they want and they throw little tantrums if they can't get it or if they can't get it on their own terms. Some of the time it's funny, but mostly it's just sad. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VedaSloan 119179 Report post Posted June 16, 2009 I just got this phone call: Me: Hello! guy: I saw your ad. Me: Yeah, did you read my website? guy: No Me: Well maybe you should, then you'd know I'm not available now. *click* He happened to catch me in an annoyed mood (it's hot in my apartment and I don't have air, it makes me cranky!), so I just hung up on him. Honestly, as Annessa said, it takes an extra 5-10 mins to review even the bare essentials of information (rates, location, hours) and if you don't even introduce yourself and then on top of that, you haven't even looked at my website? Fat chance you're going to see me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
a******s.m*****e 187 Report post Posted June 16, 2009 I just got this phone call: Me: Hello! guy: I saw your ad. Me: Yeah, did you read my website? guy: No Me: Well maybe you should, then you'd know I'm not available now. *click* He happened to catch me in an annoyed mood (it's hot in my apartment and I don't have air, it makes me cranky!), so I just hung up on him. Honestly, as Annessa said, it takes an extra 5-10 mins to review even the bare essentials of information (rates, location, hours) and if you don't even introduce yourself and then on top of that, you haven't even looked at my website? Fat chance you're going to see me. The reason why I don't hang up right away is because he could have found my ad in the paper and had no access to my website. Also, once in a blue moon a guy who sounds like a jerk with no manners turns out to be a shy guy. So I usually give them a chance. But it is like one,two,three, out. No greeting = one point against you Asking unnecessary questions = two Rushing me like your time is more important than mine = three You are out. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
buggernot 588 Report post Posted June 16, 2009 Well put Jerican. I know you said your post was a big read, but really, it probably took all us readers about 3 mins at most to read. similarly it probably only takes double that to check up on posts, reviews or a website on a lady. The very thoght that taking an extra 10 mins of time could make or break a date should be enough motivation for all to toss laziness out the window *raises her coffe-mug up in the air to a true gentleman...online and in person * :-) *then phone rings from some other guy, is asked if pics are real and looking to negotiate a better rate...expletives and coffee mug flies through the air rapidly* Gee, I'm seeing these estimates of taking between 5 and 10 mins to simply read the info they're looking for and thinking, that's a really long time! If it takes that long, they're way too dumb to have a job which would afford them the opportunity to partake in the hobby. If I find a SP's website, I may spend 10 mins on it, but I've got the info I need in 30 seconds and the other 9 1/2 mins are used for drooling over the pictures... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
coachg 388 Report post Posted June 16, 2009 The values in our society are slowly slipping into the murky depths.....lack of respect, the "me, me, me" attitude, lack of accountability and responsibility, don't give a shit attitude....all make things a little tougher for the decent people. I'm not saying everyone is like this,( look at all the decent people on cerb) but the percentage has certainly skyrocketed to where the decent people are definately the minority. Our technology today is all about immediate info, splashed directly in front of our faces, transferred at breakneck speed, but we no longer have the ability to dig deep and do a little research on our own....people have lost the ability to think as opposed to react, and that is not a good thing, which is partially as Youngstud said, the failing of our school system. It is very frustrating, but I guess we have to learn to find our own way to deal with this types of people. Just some random thoughts. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VedaSloan 119179 Report post Posted June 16, 2009 The reason why I don't hang up right away is because he could have found my ad in the paper and had no access to my website. Also, once in a blue moon a guy who sounds like a jerk with no manners turns out to be a shy guy. So I usually give them a chance. But it is like one,two,three, out. No greeting = one point against you Asking unnecessary questions = two Rushing me like your time is more important than mine = three You are out. Ha, well I don't even have an ad, I am assuming by "ad," he meant he saw my website. And since I asked him if he went over it, and he didn't, I figured, fuck it, I am not in the mood to deal with this. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites