a******s.m*****e 187 Report post Posted June 27, 2009 Sorry, I still would disagree with you. AFAIK most SP are quite clear on their website, time paid for companionship only, anything else that occurs is between two consenting adults. There is no right implied or otherwise. If she doesn't consent to it it does not occur. Full stop. Any inappropriate touching can and should be considered assault. Theoretically, yes. But imagine the reviews after a session like that. :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest B***ke Ba**** Report post Posted June 27, 2009 I do it because I'm not very attractive and I'm a loner So I basically work 24/7 and can afford to pay! Posted via Mobile Device Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YoungStud 468 Report post Posted June 27, 2009 It is a thrill to have power over somebody. Not for me. I'm so egotistical (lol) that I in general 1) find it way more flattering when smart, strong, independent women choose to spend time with me (they don't have to unless they want to) 2) find I'm stronger when I'm strong enough to trust someone enough to give up some control in the relationship to her (50-50 with another control freak is perfect for me. Lol. If you can't trust another control freak to keep up her end, who can you trust? Lol.) Y.S. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jerican 657 Report post Posted June 27, 2009 Not to come of as egotistical but I don't have an issue talking to women of any type and proved (to myself) recently I could still pick up if I wanted to. I choose to hobby for a lot of the reasons mentioned...but in particular: -The NSA aspect is a big one. You can choose when and where to have your encounter (I am big on mornings due to how busy I am at times) and once it is done...it is done. -The adventurous part of it! Variety is the spice of life and when you hobby you can take your time and try different types of women and experiences. Straight sex, greek, duos, sensual encounters, blondes, brunettes, mature, young, etc... -You know what to expect. Yes there is certainly a ymmv factor here but if you are respectful and clean and research who you are visiting you have a great idea of what you should be able to enjoy with each other. -There is a thread where people discussed bad lovers (the orgasm thread I think), it can go both ways as I can think of three women I have been with (not SP's) who were atrocious lovers. One of them had a cowgirl that was so bad I think she brusied my pelvis :? With an SP, especially the well received ones you can be pretty confident they are very good lovers and will probably teach you a few things (especially Emma with PM I am discovering!:twisted:). But my big reason and it may seem weird is the fact that I can safely give control to the SP's. I am in a position where I am constantly in control out of necessity in my personal and business life. Most if not all decisions fall to me and I am constantly called upon to solve problems or take charge. I like that with an SP or MA I can relinquish that control and let them take charge or share the decisions. In fact I am considering my next SP be one that I can be susmissive with, not full on bondage style per se, but in a 'OK tell me what to do and I will do it' standpoint'. I can't think of any girl I have picked up or hooked up with that I would feel comfortable doing that with on first contact.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Annessa 22743 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 I dont think it has to do at all with having power over a woman or having a woman be their property for the time spent. Its that kind of stereotype that many of us gals are trying to escape or protest in the sex-workers' rights movement. The stereotype that we are made to be objects or stripped of our dignity or control while on a call. True there are some men that believe that because they have thrown down X amount of bills that it gives them the power and ownership over a worker, but that does not end well and conflicts with what most of us ladies stand for. most level headed workers will not see these men again as repeat clients. returning to what I said before, talking about how we offer the "promise". the promise is strictly a connection,,,a promise that we will try our best to offer you everything you are looking for. but to clarify, it has to fit within our allowances and the request must be made with respect...and a mutual understanding that a good experience with us is a privilege....not a right 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
esoterica 624 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 It's not completely about the sex. It's about the experience, the fantasy, the complete emotional break from the outside world, the excitement. Besides sex, 99% of the SPs I have met are really cool people to play/chat/interact/converse with. When single, I probably pick up as many or more civilian women as I see SPs. Maybe I am an adrenaline junkie. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
a******s.m*****e 187 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 I dont think it has to do at all with having power over a woman or having a woman be their property for the time spent. I hate to say it, but it does. Interestingly, most people who vehemently deny the ownership for an hour believe that men are natural "hunters" and they have to spread their seeds. From this attitude, naturally follows that after you have been hunted down you are "owned", right? Because why do you hunt if not for the possession of something? And after you hunted something down it is yours. You eat it or put it on your wall, take a picure and brag to your visitors about it. Why is this any different from owning a person for one hour? Its that kind of stereotype that many of us gals are trying to escape or protest in the sex-workers' rights movement. The stereotype that we are made to be objects or stripped of our dignity or control while on a call. OK, then please protest against men as hunters, because that is the same thing. True there are some men that believe that because they have thrown down X amount of bills that it gives them the power and ownership over a worker, but that does not end well and conflicts with what most of us ladies stand for. most level headed workers will not see these men again as repeat clients. returning to what I said before, talking about how we offer the "promise". the promise is strictly a connection,,,a promise that we will try our best to offer you everything you are looking for. but to clarify, it has to fit within our allowances and the request must be made with respect...and a mutual understanding that a good experience with us is a privilege....not a right OK, just for the sake of argument. What happens if you don't follow through with your "promise"? If this is just a promise, you can just say you changed your mind and want to paint your toes or play scrabble insted, because you are not obligated to anything, right? Or wrong? :) 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PistolPete 61421 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 For me it is purely intimacy, sensual loving, fantasy becoming reality, for me it has nothing to do with power or controlling a women to an extent that I think she is my property, in actual fact she is my lover for an hour or more. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
a******s.m*****e 187 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 For me it is purely intimacy, sensual loving, fantasy becoming reality, for me it has nothing to do with power or controlling a women to an extent that I think she is my property, in actual fact she is my lover for an hour or more. What if you arrive and she doesn't feel like being your lover? All she made was a promise and she is not obligated to anything. Or is she? :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PistolPete 61421 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 It has happen before, mutual agreement, that we depart..or she/I have gone through the emotions, but it is a learning curve in life for both parties, for me I just don't repeat with her, don't worry I can tell after many years. I found some very special ladies, here and honestly- they all have been my lover for my date. If it was to happen to a pick up in a bar- things that can go wrong- intoxication, wrong way to make love to a new found lover, she is not in the mood- same thing- doesn't want to be your lover, so you poured open your wallet and heart to her, and leave for home, without a kiss. So it goes both ways, but on the most part the ladies here 99% of the time have been great lovers, and great friends, what else can I ask for!:mrgreen: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
a******s.m*****e 187 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 It has happen before, mutual agreement, that we depart..or she/I have gone through the emotions, but it is a learning curve in life for both parties, for me I just don't repeat with her, don't worry I can tell after many years. I found some very special ladies, here and honestly- they all have been my lover for my date. If it was to happen to a pick up in a bar- things that can go wrong- intoxication, wrong way to make love to a new found lover, she is not in the mood- same thing- doesn't want to be your lover, so you poured open your wallet and heart to her, and leave for home, without a kiss. So it goes both ways, but on the most part the ladies here 99% of the time have been great lovers, and great friends, what else can I ask for!:mrgreen: OK, then I will ask a more specific question. You arrive and want to kiss her and fondle her and she says you can't because you only paid for her time. What next? Will you just talk for an hour? Write a nice recommendation on how nice a conversationalist she is? Or will you be ticked off, call her a fraud and warn other men about her? ;) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Annessa 22743 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 Anita at the risk of getting into an argument I'm going to not and leave it at that you dont fully understand the SP or SP-client etiquette. And unfortunately have some stereotypes about us SPs and our clients that are very society driven. i can't blame you, but being a member on this boards I would expect more when you read comments by polite gentlmen...not power-hunters obviously services or service-types are communicated clearly between clients and SPs beforehand. why would an SP show up not wanting to be someone's lover? Most SPs get just as much pleasure out of their encounters as the men who pay for their time. if she does that and there has been no communication beforehand that she is an escort that functions solely on company and no intimacy, then she should have clearly noted that beforehand and if the client wishes to go elsewhere he will. if she doesn't clearly communicate beforehand, shes a crappy escort...plan and simple, misleading someone shouldnt happen. You're allowed to have your opinions Anita, but you also have to take what others who are more involved directly say with some belief. The MP and SP world are different I'll agree, but we have more control and dignity in common than I think you're willing to admit 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
buggernot 588 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 OK, then I will ask a more specific question. You arrive and want to kiss her and fondle her and she says you can't because you only paid for her time. What next? Will you just talk for an hour? Write a nice recommendation on how nice a conversationalist she is? Or will you be ticked off, call her a fraud and warn other men about her? ;) No offense Anita, but you're getting way off topic here! Yes, the caveat beforehand is that you're paying for time and companionship, but we all know that the ultimatum in almost all instances is sex in some form or another. You need to find a better metaphor than ownership or you're going to get in some doo-doo from the other ladies ;) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emma Alexandra 123368 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 Anita at the risk of getting into an argument I'm going to not and leave it at that you dont fully understand the SP or SP-client etiquette. And unfortunately have some stereotypes about us SPs and our clients that are very society driven. i can't blame you, but being a member on this boards I would expect more when you read comments by polite gentlmen...not power-hunters obviously services or service-types are communicated clearly between clients and SPs beforehand. why would an SP show up not wanting to be someone's lover? Most SPs get just as much pleasure out of their encounters as the men who pay for their time. if she does that and there has been no communication beforehand that she is an escort that functions solely on company and no intimacy, then she should have clearly noted that beforehand and if the client wishes to go elsewhere he will. if she doesn't clearly communicate beforehand, shes a crappy escort...plan and simple, misleading someone shouldnt happen. You're allowed to have your opinions Anita, but you also have to take what others who are more involved directly say with some belief. The MP and SP world are different I'll agree, but we have more control and dignity in common than I think you're willing to admit I second this....i can't read it any longer...my eyes are now closed on this subject...and my ears...lalalala Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PistolPete 61421 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 Thanks my lover Annessa...(you see Anita I can call Annessa my lover, she and I have shared a very intimate time together, and for me that is what it is all about). Anita....Surely to god you know that a SP is not going to tell me that I'm only paying for her time-no fondling or touching??...why would she even think of being an a service provider. Lets move on...shall we... Anita at the risk of getting into an argument I'm going to not and leave it at that you dont fully understand the SP or SP-client etiquette. And unfortunately have some stereotypes about us SPs and our clients that are very society driven. i can't blame you, but being a member on this boards I would expect more when you read comments by polite gentlmen...not power-hunters obviously services or service-types are communicated clearly between clients and SPs beforehand. why would an SP show up not wanting to be someone's lover? Most SPs get just as much pleasure out of their encounters as the men who pay for their time. if she does that and there has been no communication beforehand that she is an escort that functions solely on company and no intimacy, then she should have clearly noted that beforehand and if the client wishes to go elsewhere he will. if she doesn't clearly communicate beforehand, shes a crappy escort...plan and simple, misleading someone shouldnt happen. You're allowed to have your opinions Anita, but you also have to take what others who are more involved directly say with some belief. The MP and SP world are different I'll agree, but we have more control and dignity in common than I think you're willing to admit Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
a******s.m*****e 187 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 Anita....Surely to god you know that a SP is not going to tell me that I'm only paying for her time-no fondling or touching??...why would she even think of being an a service provider. Lets move on...shall we... Sorry, but that was to clarify what YOU guys said that an escort is not obligated to anything. Obviously she is, and yes, let's move on. Everybody has the right to kid himself/herself, you included LOL Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YoungStud 468 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 I agree with those who say there's a difference between an SP/EP and an MA. Having never been to an MA, I'm just going to accept that fact as being pretty obvious on the face of it. I also agree with those who are indicating it's time to take a deep breath and move on in this thread. Two minor points I'll make just from my own point of view before I do that. why would an SP show up not wanting to be someone's lover? I've never imagined an SP/EP was my lover. Personally, that's a term I reserve for a level of emotional and sexual intimacy combined with a deep level of relationship commitment I've never found and feel I'm unlikely to find (though I'm always an optimist) in any escort reatlionship. I've had a lot of great times, both sexually and socially, with some incredibly sensual and smart and good women in the escort world. But even my fave, with whom I have a deep personal connection and for whom I have a high degree of trust and affection and caring, I would never call my lover. And she would totally support me in that. She has a lover who is her life partner and with whom she has a relationship much deeper than she has with me. So we would never use that term with each other. Most SPs get just as much pleasure out of their encounters as the men who pay for their time. You know, after more than 25 years of doing this (I started out pretty young - lol) - I hope that's true, but I'm not really sure it is. Some sure do. But most? I don't know. There's a lot of reasons why women are in this business, at every level. Not all of them good, though many are pretty good at hiding it. But personally, I really have derived the greatest satisfaction from those who completely enjoy what they do - and do it with great honesty and passion and dignity. It would be nice if all their clients brought the same values to the table - or the bedroom. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Annessa 22743 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 Sorry, but that was to clarify what YOU guys said that an escort is not obligated to anything. Obviously she is, and yes, let's move on. ...just not obligated to do anything she doesn't want to do or that strays out of her control, Anita. I hope we all have learned something today...oy Originally Posted by Annessa2009 why would an SP show up not wanting to be someone's lover? Youngstud: I've never imagined an SP/EP was my lover. temporary lover, companion, friend, muse, lovely respectful woman, ...they're all the same in my books, lets not pick on what each means to everyone :-) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
a******s.m*****e 187 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 ...just not obligated to do anything she doesn't want to do or that strays out of her control, Anita. I hope we all have learned something today...oy Believe me Annessa, I am not the enemy..... All I wanted was to share how I felt watching the Chippendales LOL Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Parker 19761 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 Sorry, but that was to clarify what YOU guys said that an escort is not obligated to anything. Obviously she is, and yes, let's move on. Everybody has the right to kid himself/herself, you included LOL I know people probably don't want to hear most of this, but I see Anita's point. No, I don't think most of my clients would hang around if all they were paying for was good conversation... ... at the same time though I don't think it's right to say she doesn't get it because she's a MA. I mean, as a MA she's under the same scrutiny and reviews... and I'm sure without lovely breasts, a positive attitude and a happy ending, most MAs wouldn't have that much business as well. No, you may not want to "own" her for an hour... but maybe you'd like the feeling of exclusivity, of having her all to yourself? Making her your girlfriend or lover for an hour? I think with escorts, for the most part, you know what you're getting. It's piece of mind, it's getting sex when you can't (or the type of sex you can't), doing things your wife won't... maybe it's just an ego boost... I'm sure there are tons of reason, just depends on who you ask and when you ask them... 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YoungStud 468 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 temporary lover, companion, friend, muse, lovely respectful woman, ...they're all the same in my books, lets not pick on what each means to everyone :-) Agreed. Just expressing my personal view on a particular term previously. All your terms work for me. I really like friend and muse. They're both good, because they don't always happen, but sometimes can. I always like the exceptions more than the rules. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Seymour 3970 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 I'm weighing in on this topic late however, here are some thoughts. I think the comment re: "an escort is not obligated to anything - "do anything" is what I think was meant - likely falls between the realm of YMMV. Sure, some providers go out of their way to provide a great session and they get a kick ass recommendation and for the ones that don't well - can't say anything bad on this board right. But hey, I bet their business isn't doing all that prosperous eh! I believe the very fabric of this endeavor implies some sort of intimacy. This lends itself to the whole arena of mileage...how much the SP is willing to 'put out' for the client to ensure a happy client and repeat business. Now personally speaking - I have been on dates where the conversation. mood and mindset is such that there is no need for nudity, where the whole date is more cerebral than physical. There is nothing wrong with this. I have also been on dates where it's gotten pretty heated because of either the attraction, passion and chemistry, or after I've seen someone a few times and yes, in the past I have made statements like "claiming her body as mine" - however this was not to imply that I forced or pressured anyone to do anything or any particular act. It was purely a metaphorical reference to being possessive, implying a heightened sense of intimacy and elevating the one on one rapport with my date as opposed to dominating anyone. Same applies when I refer to someone as "my girl". Now for the original question - why pay when one can get it for free? Well, nothing in life is free and why fuck around with amateurs when heaven is a phone call away? Different strokes for different folks, I know who and what I like. This is not meant to be confrontational, just an opinion. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest W***ledi*Time Report post Posted June 28, 2009 If this is just a promise, you can just say you changed your mind and want to paint your toes or play scrabble insted, because you are not obligated to anything, right? Or wrong? This thought experiment is indeed an odd one -- but thought experiments by their very nature are intended to be somewhat detached from reality, I suppose. So I'll play along for one round: A provider is not OBLIGATED to do anything that is outside her comfort zone. However, she is quite reasonably EXPECTED to be in the business that she has advertised. This business is based on an exchange of money for a specific type of service. (Note: it is not an exchange of money for "ownership" or for "power" or any other psychobabble anyone may wish to imagine: it is an exchange of money for a service. This is really not a strange or particularly suspicious idea!) But, as in so many things in life, common-sense prevails. If a so-called "provider" has no valid client-specific reason as to why she will not "do anything", and is operating instead on an "April Fools!" basis (her policy is that she always only plays Scrabble, even though she markets herself as something else) then that really is deliberate deception ("fraud", if you will) -- and she's not a "provider" at all, technically. (The traditional pro-forma disclaimer on providers' ads about "time" do not make them any less a claim to being a provider of these other services.) No matter how charming a Scrabble player she is, word will get around that she is not really a full provider, and her client list will likely not get as long as it otherwise would, lol (no offense intended to Scrabble players -- I love Scrabble, even though it only has one X). Now, watching her paint her toes could be a whole other story ... Cheers, Wrinkled Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YoungStud 468 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 All really good points, Nai. With some important nuances on what has been previously said. Thanks for making them. All of the stuff on this thread has made me think. And that's always a good thing. I know people probably don't want to hear most of this, but I see Anita's point. No, I don't think most of my clients would hang around if all they were paying for was good conversation... ... at the same time though I don't think it's right to say she doesn't get it because she's a MA. I mean, as a MA she's under the same scrutiny and reviews... and I'm sure without lovely breasts, a positive attitude and a happy ending, most MAs wouldn't have that much business as well. No, you may not want to "own" her for an hour... but maybe you'd like the feeling of exclusivity, of having her all to yourself? Making her your girlfriend or lover for an hour? I think with escorts, for the most part, you know what you're getting. It's piece of mind, it's getting sex when you can't (or the type of sex you can't), doing things your wife won't... maybe it's just an ego boost... I'm sure there are tons of reason, just depends on who you ask and when you ask them... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Annessa 22743 Report post Posted June 28, 2009 Believe me Annessa, I am not the enemy..... All I wanted was to share how I felt watching the Chippendales LOL lol not to worry ANita, i dont think you're the enemy :-) I just sent you a pretty neutral PM to clear things up. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
