If an SP fell for a client, what do I do??

[Phlipspecial69 1449]

Hello, Has anyone ever been in this scenario, and if so any ADVICE??

 

Clients fall for SP's i hear and see often, but when an SP falls for the client, how do i still keep that professional relationship together?

 

I just seen a regular SP of mine last night and it felt like i just a lost a friend, she told me she cannot see me anymore because our connection has reached an emotional level (even though she still has other regular clients) and just like that it was over.

 

I know this isn't a relationship board-but is this common!??!?!

[Midnite-Energies 110563]

It is VERY common on either side that when emotions become involved, the person with the emotions steps back to provide some breathing room to give clarity to what they're feeling.

 

Unfortunately the only advice I can give you is to deal with your own feelings of losing someone you considered a friend. You have to respect the wishes of the SP to step back. At this point there is no way to maintain a professional relationship. That doesn't mean that might night change. Feelings change and if she realizes that what she was feeling is different than what she thought, she may open that door again. I wouldn't count on it but it's always a possibility. I assume feelings are not mutual because of your comment so maybe take a look at other SP's and find one that interests you.

 

Good luck, it's not an easy situation to have to deal with.

[Two Thirty 1422]

It's only reasonable that a SP could fall for a client. SPs are, after all, human.

 

If the SP puts a stop to seeing you as a client, the reason may well be because the relationship between the two of you has grown to a point where it is putting at risk that element of self-control and self-discipline your SP must have in order to make a livelihood. And that, as everyone should understand, needs to come first.

 

Be grateful that you had the privilege of having shared some great moments with this person, and be graceful. Accept that she is not ready to take it to the next level and that for now at least, your relationship with her, such as it was, has ended.

 

Consent is EVERYTHING. If this person wants you back in her life, she'll let you know.

[Soleil Sublime 38108]

Yes, it does happen, absolutely. Especially when that connection can be so tempting to pursue. This business may be a pleasure industry but you are dealing with humans who have or can develop feelings for other like-mindedly amazing people. It just sucks when it can't go anywhere. I know it hurts, but believe me, she was trying to do you both a favour. Be extra nice to yourself for a while. Spoil yourself for being so damn charming! ;-)

[JodyWild 4740]

Yes I Definitely Agree With The Above comments. It Does Happen On Both Sides For Sure...The Person Who May Have Developed The Emotional/Physical Feelings May Step Back & Need To Take A Break Or The Other Way Around, Maybe The Other Person Doesn't Have The Same Feelings & Needs To Step Back. Unfortunately We Are All Human & We Can't Control How Our Feelings Make Us Feel...But We Can Only Learn How To Deal With Them. If One Were To Take Step Back & Not See The Other Anymore, The Other Would Have No Choice But To Respect How The Other Has Chosen To Deal With The Situation. I Know It Is Not The Greatest Feeling To Lose A Friend Aka An Sp/Client...But Give It Time & In The Mean Time Find A New Sweet Kitty You Can Have Fun With Who Can Treat You Right/Well & Make Her Purr & Maybe In The Future There May Be A Point Where You Can Keep It To a Friend Basis. If Not Not Much You Can Do. Best Of Luck With Your Situation.

[Eraser 529]

I had to stop seeing my favorite Lady based on her falling just a little in love with this old cowboy.I was deeply saddened that it had to go that way,I thought very highly (and still do)of her and would pick up our friendship in a second if I could.She's a lovely person and I miss her very much,but we had no where to go with a relationship.

[Czdrummer 651]

This is soooo very true. I am quite new to the scene (about a year) I'm currently in a relationship with a beautiful, caring lady and we have become very trusting and close with each other. It took many months and a ton of time and commitment. I've had to step back at one point to cool things off because it was making me nuts. I was seeing another lady during that time but stopped visiting her a month ago. So now, more than ever, things have been really heating up with us again since I went back. A year has flown by and its turned into an extremely close personal trusting friendship. I cherish her more with each passing encounter. She was a tough nut to crack, but I'm now getting what I need from her....much more than just an SP/client relationship. I have expressed my inner most feelings with her, and she has gotten emotional, almost to the point of crying. It's been many months since I posted about my adventures with her, but reading the comments on this topic made me realize how much I really adore my beautiful girl.

[Guest ***rgi*****9]

 

I just seen a regular SP of mine last night and it felt like i just a lost a friend, she told me she cannot see me anymore because our connection has reached an emotional level (even though she still has other regular clients) and just like that it was over.

 

Well Philip it is never a. Fun situation when emotions take over, someone always ends up hurt.

 

The only thing I can say to you about this is to move on, enjoy the memories and leave it at that. If you don't and persue something either you or your special SP will be hurt and the end result will be something neither is happy with.

 

If your single and you think you can handle dating a SP knowing, that all these guys are on here trying to get themselves rocked by her well then what you can do is contact her and say you will no longer be a client but you would like to see if something could develop between you.

 

Personally I would just leave it but that's me.

 

Good luck.

[Guest A** L***]

I personally have felt more towards a gentleman here and there which may be questionable. Perhaps feeling more open than usual. Perhaps liking them a touch more than the usual SP/ client relationship. Since I am human, I let it just be. I know and respect the boundaries so I haven't gotten to the point where I have ever needed to sever ties. But I CERTAINLY look forward to each meet. Sometimes even get butterflies!!

 

I feel the SP did the utmost professional thing however. For the sake of both of you. We are human. When a persons' heart is at risk in a situation where clearly that is not what the boundaries allow, whether it be the SP or hobbiest, best to walk. As tough as it is for now. You will appreciate and understand it later.

 

 

Hang in there!!

 

 

 

 

Xx

[Desiree Delights 2210]

....it seems to happen in the movies - anyone remember "Pretty Woman?" well, welcome to the real world!

I've been around and yes, it has happened. I've also seen a lot of women have their time wasted by someone who was not sincere and who just was tired of paying for company. it will happen & the relationship will last if the guy is honest & does have genuine feelings for the woman, if he is generous, helpful & treats the lady right. (and vice versa)

today's "customers" complain about being broke, hating their job, having no job, seem to really resent paying for company, etc. -- so it gives one the impression the guy is looking for sympathy and hoping to score a meal ticket or be rescued by a "rich" woman. for women that are not rich (& even those that are) this is hardly a turn on & not someone you are likely to develop feelings for.

[Czdrummer 651]

I want to thank all you for sharing some of your stories and experiences. This message board has been a god send for me over the last several months. This thread in particular has opened my eyes and helped me realize that I'm not the fucked up nut job I thought I was. Yes, we are all human, and we can be complex creatures at times. Thanks again.

[Guest A** L***]

...

today's "customers" complain about being broke, hating their job, having no job, seem to really resent paying for company, etc. -- so it gives one the impression the guy is looking for sympathy and hoping to score a meal ticket or be rescued by a "rich" woman. for women that are not rich (& even those that are) this is hardly a turn on & not someone you are likely to develop feelings for.

 

 

 

I didn't personally get the feeling this was this gents motive or concern. Seemed to be a genuine feeling of loss for a lady he respects and cares for. Could be wrong but that was my feeling from his post. Not all men are the way which was described by you. We all have different experiences I suppose.

 

 

 

 

Xx

[SamanthaEvans 166767]

As others have said already, SPs are real people with real feelings. That this happens sometimes is one of the realities of our work. It's not a lot of fun for anyone, though.

 

Give yourself a pat on the back. She told you how she felt and what she had decided to do. She trusts you and was willing to make herself vulnerable with you. She didn't send an e-mail goodbye, ignore your messages or stop returning your calls: many others would have done something like that. She's taken you and herself seriously. That says a lot about your character and how important the time you spent together has been for her.

 

Don't sit around, waiting for her to contact you again, though, and don't initiate contact with her, either. She needs this separation.

[throckmortonpruddygo 2025]

Hello, Has anyone ever been in this scenario, and if so any ADVICE??

 

Clients fall for SP's i hear and see often, but when an SP falls for the client, how do i still keep that professional relationship together?

 

I just seen a regular SP of mine last night and it felt like i just a lost a friend, she told me she cannot see me anymore because our connection has reached an emotional level (even though she still has other regular clients) and just like that it was over.

 

I know this isn't a relationship board-but is this common!??!?!

 

It happens. I know the feeling, but she did the right thing. Best thing is to stay away as it sounds like maybe you were heading down that same road. And the only thing at the end of that road is disaster.

[Kaylee Kisses 1526]

gotta be honest I too have "fallen " for a client but im smart enough st stop the relationship because its better kept professional :(

[rob spence 1199]

About a year ago I had the same thing happen to me. Believe me your Sp treated you with respect because she told you she didn't want to see you again . In my case she never told me and it went too far her feelings were way to strong and it turned threatening cause she said " she had to be with me " and so a year later I still have a headache . Just be happy she told you and let it be when emotions settle you two may become friends again.

[craig101 3213]

I have had 6 or 7 sp's in love with me. Once two of them were literally fighting each other for my attention. The worst part is when the alarm clock wakes me up!

[young60 1118]

Over the years this has happened to me on a few different occassions....a couple of times it was me...a couple of times it was her, and one time it was both of us....fortunately in all cases we both realized that there was no future in any other relationship other than a sp/client situation, and we both agreed to just enjoy the moment, and not get caught up in it all....fortunately in all cases we brought it up, talked about it and learned how to deal with our feelings and emotions, although in some cases it was not very easy.....in one case we both agreed to step back for awhile , until both our heads were back in the right place, and then we resumed our relationship/freindship/buisness agreement.....in all cases $$ always remained a part of it, although at times the amount, or time spent together was not near the norm.....but there always was some form of buisness aspect to it. I enjoy a relationship when the other person cares , and enjoys there time with spent with you...... I was extremely fortunate in the case where we both fell for each other, that the lady realized that it was best for both of us if we didnt pursue the relationship farther, because I might have considered leaving my current situation for her had she really pushed it......instead we continued a very close relationship for several years until she moved, and if my current situation would ever change, we have a understanding that I could look her up, and we can start fresh and see what happens.

It happens more than one thinks , but probably more that the guy falls for the SP than the other way around....it is tough though...very tough!!!!! God I Miss her!!!

[mrgreen760 37785]

It hasn't happened to me that I'm aware of ....... and I know.....shocking !! :)

 

Peace

MG

[Desiree Delights 2210]

I didn't personally get the feeling this was this gents motive or concern. Seemed to be a genuine feeling of loss for a lady he respects and cares for. Could be wrong but that was my feeling from his post. Not all men are the way which was described by you. We all have different experiences I suppose.

 

 

 

 

Xx

he wouldn't admit that on here, would he? yes, in this case he may be sincere. my point is that the way most customers behave now I doubt many sp's develop "feelings" for them

 

Additional Comments:

....it seems to happen in the movies - anyone remember "Pretty Woman?" well, welcome to the real world!

I've been around and yes, it has happened. I've also seen a lot of women have their time wasted by someone who was not sincere and who just was tired of paying for company. it will happen & the relationship will last if the guy is honest & does have genuine feelings for the woman, if he is generous, helpful & treats the lady right. (and vice versa)

today's "customers" complain about being broke, hating their job, having no job, seem to really resent paying for company, etc. -- so it gives one the impression the guy is looking for sympathy and hoping to score a meal ticket or be rescued by a "rich" woman. for women that are not rich (& even those that are) this is hardly a turn on & not someone you are likely to develop feelings for.

 

also to add, it seems a lot of the "locals" expect free dinner dates, want you to go to their house for dinner - outings, spend the night etc. all unpaid. then they get nasty if you don't spend time with them unpaid. well, I do not "date" the customers or hang around with them. maybe others do this, but for them to expect this is unreasonable.

[piano8950 32577]

my point is that the way most customers behave now I doubt many sp's develop "feelings" for them

 

 

Not to go off-topic, but how do most customers behave?

[mrgreen760 37785]

he wouldn't admit that on here, would he? yes, in this case he may be sincere. my point is that the way most customers behave now I doubt many sp's develop "feelings" for them

 

Perhaps you should seek a different type of customer if you feel that way...... just sayin.

 

With that in mind there is no doubt the game has changed both customers and service providers alike...

 

Peace

MG

[Johnny Canuck 5347]

In a way it has sort of happened to me with an encounter I had with an SP. It was kind of weird, but in the end it is something we both laugh about now.

 

I met this girl previously outside of her work through a mutual friend and was quite sometime before we talked or saw each other. I saw an ad for a SP and booked some time with her and when I went to her incall and she opened the door we both instantly recognized each other and felt a little uncomfortable. (One reason why I hate photoshopped pictures)

 

We kept it professional, but in the end developed a pretty good friendship and talk pretty much every day as friends and nothing more. We just laugh about the initial meeting we had now. Lol

 

So there are always positives and negatives no matter what. It just sucks that as humans we have no control over matters of the heart.

[Desiree Delights 2210]

Not to go off-topic, but how do most customers behave?

 

as per your question - customers don't behave as customers anymore.

they've expected me to "spend the night" with them- for free(because others do this - so they say),

-go on little dates & outings - for free

-take trips with them - for free

-talk on the phone with them, when they are bored or lonely

-do drugs with them and also get drugs for them (because others do),

-pick them up & provide them with taxi service so they can

get money or go buy drugs

-provide them with cheap incalls or cheap outcalls because they don't have much money, have no job & because other girls give them cheap rates

 

it's fine to "ask" -- but to expect these things & be nasty & abusive if they "don't get their own way" is very immature and ridiculous. act like "men" not spoiled "little boys" and women will want to be around you.

 

Many of the "locals" have had very unrealistic expectations - and it is a huge turn off

[Czdrummer 651]

as per your question - customers don't behave as customers anymore.

they've expected me to "spend the night" with them- for free(because others do this - so they say),

-go on little dates & outings - for free

-take trips with them - for free

-talk on the phone with them, when they are bored or lonely

-do drugs with them and also get drugs for them (because others do),

-pick them up & provide them with taxi service so they can

get money or go buy drugs

-provide them with cheap incalls or cheap outcalls because they don't have much money, have no job & because other girls give them cheap rates

 

it's fine to "ask" -- but to expect these things & be nasty & abusive if they "don't get their own way" is very immature and ridiculous. act like "men" not spoiled "little boys" and women will want to be around you.

 

Many of the "locals" have had very unrealistic expectations - and it is a huge turn off

 

Very interesting and a real turnoff I bet. Sound like a bunch of loser clients. I'm proud to say that none of the above behaviour applies to me. But at the same time I won't be taken advantage of either, whether it be with an SP or any other woman. Ive had a previous lady I was seeing ask me to pay her rent, bills etc...so it was arriiverderci for her. I don't tolerate drugs either. I'm with the perfect woman now and I intend on keeping her happy.