Cleo Catra 178382 Report post Posted July 6, 2013 (edited) Specifically girls, but I didn't want to put 'how to talk to young girls' in the subject line and have anyone think something weird about that. I just read this article about how to address little girls when you meet them, and I think it's brilliant. I admit, I am guilty of almost always complimenting their appearance when I meet a little girl. After reading this, I'm going to make a serious effort to change that. I remember when I was a child, I wasn't concerned about appearance. I would have wanted to talk about books, making cakes, cats (my interests haven't changed much, lol). It wasn't until people made appearance an issue that it became one. I think this is the best thing I've seen online in quite a while, and I hope it's something people can keep in mind around impressionable kids http://latinafatale.com/2011/07/21/how-to-talk-to-little-girls/ Edited July 6, 2013 by C**o C**ra 17 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Johnny Canuck 5347 Report post Posted July 6, 2013 Thank you for the amazing article Cleo. It certainly makes you rethink how to address them as well as just talk to them or of them in general. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
castle 38816 Report post Posted July 6, 2013 One thing I tend to do when talking to children is not dumb down my speech pattern. I talk to them as I would anyone else. Of course the topics of what I am talking about and the language I'm using are guarded lol. But the tone of my voice remains consistent with my usual speech pattern. I've noticed a lot of people's voices get higher when they're talking to children...and the way they word things change. It's like subconsciously, they all of a sudden start pretending they are the child's age. I don't do that. And in my experience, children always seem to notice and appreciate that from me. As for babies. I don't do the "goo goo ga ga" sounds at them. I've tried and it usually results with a "wtf" look from the baby and he/she crawls back to one of their parents and gives them a look that quite clearly states "who invited the weirdo?" lol. Now I just talk to them. Sure, they probably don't understand everything I'm saying yet but on some level they seem to understand that I'm speaking to them as a real person, and not as a puppy, and they seem to really enjoy that. They don't squeal laughter at me like when someone tickles them or plays the "peek-a-boo" game with them...but my method of talking to them seems to intrigue and interest them. I'm not a parent and I don't know the first thing about raising kids....but I figure interesting and intriguing a baby can't be too bad for their mental development right? 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CristyCurves 169032 Report post Posted July 6, 2013 When I was a child I would always get how cute and tiny I was and a pinch on the cheek, especially form one of my female neighbours. It drove me nuts and left an impression I think of how important ones appearance is. I think whatever a child hears over and over again is going to leave an impression and perhaps even form their opinion on how they see themselves and everyone else. I am a very visual person and I can be overly critical of my own appearance and those who I'm with, almost obsessively so. Whether this is from lessons learned or genetic, who knows. Now when I meet and talk to children I make an effort not to mention their appearance. Most kids are very curious and will ask questions so its easy to get into a conversation without having to mention their obvious cuteness. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nicolette Vaughn 294340 Report post Posted July 6, 2013 I have a few nieces and I don't talk to them like they actually a chid and I'm a grownup. Same with the teenagers. Don't treat them like a child, treat them like a human being. As for appearance, they are very impressionable at a young age and bullying at school is always happening. I try to encourage them rather than telling them "Don't do this or that" or "Don't eat that, it will make you fat. Positive encouragement leads to positive behaviour and positive attitudes about one's self at an early yet critical age. Behaviour is learned through parents, is passed on and children always witness that. They are always watching. Parents from another generation are going to pass on certain things to their children or make them think a certain way just through their behaviour alone. I try to think twice about doing this with young ones in my family. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Midnite-Energies 110563 Report post Posted July 6, 2013 So much easier to remember all this from the outside than when you're stuck in the midst of it with everything else happening around you. It's funny how you make these commitments to yourself to NOT be like your parents or be this way or that and out the window it flies. It all boils down to love and doing your best. Remembering that children are just little people and they deserve the same respect and intelligence that you would give an adult. The topics may be different but the underlying messages should be the same. You matter, you are important and you are a sum of your whole. Okay, time to start fresh today and do a better job! Thanks to everyone who takes time to help our kids! 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Brad 49548 Report post Posted July 6, 2013 Reminds me of this short video that's been going around: 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoddyThomas 2746 Report post Posted July 6, 2013 I talk to all kids like a grownup. No vulgar language or topics of course. I never talk down to children. Some of them are smarter than adults. With my nieces and friends young girls, I always like to compliment accomplishments, and intelligence. My 11 year old niece finally asked if she was pretty. I responded "Of course you are, you are beautiful, but as we all know girls have cooties", which led to her beating me up and trying to smother me with a pillow. I often say I am impressed when a buddy's child helps with dishes, yardwork etc. Positive re-enforcement is the way to go for me. My Dad was the opposite. Never praised, always critical. I think it is so important to tell young girls they are smart, and sweet and can be anything they want to. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
goldandrocks 673 Report post Posted July 7, 2013 Strong Post Cleo, Thanks huge for the link and the awareness. Have to admit I automatically complement on the pretty dress not realizing how i reinforce the stigma so this article was a real eye opener...yet embarrassingly obvious. As I said, you represent everything that's good in this Escort/Hobbyist world... Sorry, but you are also smoking hot...lol. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites