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STD/HIV testing, are we all being responsible?

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Hi everyone,

 

This is my first post EVER, I know its a touchy subject but lets be real, and not shy away from it. I am a hobbiest, and Love and respect women of all walks of life. I have a free conscious, of knowing I would not want to harm anyone. I get tested regular, even though I'm always safe, but never know, how does everyone else feel about this????

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I too am tested often, its all our responsibility to make sure we are healthy while providing and hobbying. But it boils down to self respect. If you respect yourself you'll take care of your health to your best ability and you'll be respecful and thoughtful of others as well.

Edited by cr**tyc***es
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I go to the sexual health clinic about every 6 months.

 

I like to post when I go on my profile page.

 

I think it is a good way to promote it and to let all the women I spend time with know I care about myself and about them.

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Guest S****r

It's not a touchy subject in this community at all. We all should be going regularly. I was going every six months, but have decided to go every three months instead now. If I could go every month, I would, but the clinic tends to frown on that, thinking we are abusing their services.

 

I encourage everyone else to get tested regularly, too!

 

Play safe!

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I think another question that begs to be asked is what if you do catch something? As a SP do you tell your previous clients so they can get checked and as a hobbyist do you tell the SP's you've been with? I think it is great that people get checked (as I do) but the harder part is if someone catches something as I would imagine being an SP and revealing that to a previous client could perhaps destroy their chances of continuing to be a SP? It is a touchy subject, but yet, I think the proper thing to do would to let people know if you contracted something.

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Ever since I've turned 16, i've been tested every other month. Force of habit, as I do know that one of my friends tested positive for Herpes, and I wouldn't want to be in the same situation (numerous problems).

 

I've been monogamous until 19 (broke up with my girlfriend), but there's also the fact that I don't want to have to tell an SP that "I caught herpes, and you should get tested too" because it'd be too much of a detriment to their line of work, and a violation of what I see as an implied agreement. The SP is D&DF, and so should the hobbyist.

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I admit I think I live in a bit of a cloud when it comes to this. I get tested every two months, and assume everyone knows that, and I also assume my clients get tested (although not as regularly). I completely assume that because of my reputation on here, clients will know I am a responsible, smart, healthy provider, and therefore, of course I get tested, and only engage in covered intercourse.

 

If someone tells me they want to book, but first want to know if I'm 'clean', or 'do you get tested', I can sometimes take offence to that. I once said to someone 'I wouldn't advertise on here if I was selling dirty sex, and I would never ask a client when he'd last been tested', or something like that. I admit that was an over-reaction, but... well, it WAS my reaction.

 

I do think it's something people should be able to talk about on here, but my advice is be careful if approaching a provider before an encounter. I know I'm not the only one who can have, and has had, the above reaction to that question. We work hard to show you who we are, and we work hard to provide our clients with safe and professional service. Sexual health is of the utmost importance - so we can get offended if you question that. We are human. Now, I know some gentlemen may think 'What's the big deal, we should be able to ask that'. But the only answer I can give is... well that was my honest reaction to that question. Overreaction? Maybe. But honest reaction? Yes.

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I do think it's something people should be able to talk about on here, but my advice is be careful if approaching a provider before an encounter. I know I'm not the only one who can have, and has had, the above reaction to that question. We work hard to show you who we are, and we work hard to provide our clients with safe and professional service. Sexual health is of the utmost importance - so we can get offended if you question that. We are human. Now, I know some gentlemen may think 'What's the big deal, we should be able to ask that'. But the only answer I can give is... well that was my honest reaction to that question. Overreaction? Maybe. But honest reaction? Yes.

 

Perhaps a better approach for us as clients is to say something about your own status, along the lines of, "I just wanted you to know that I was just at the clinic last month for a test and I always practice safe sex so I should be clean." That kind of opens the door for the conversation. Then maybe you could then follow up with a "how often do you go?" or something non-judgemental that doesn't imply anything.

 

Yes, we can probably assume all the ladies on here are diligent but I think some clients just might want the warm fuzzy feeling from having the discussion.

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Perhaps a better approach for us as clients is to say something about your own status, along the lines of, "I just wanted you to know that I was just at the clinic last month for a test and I always practice safe sex so I should be clean." That kind of opens the door for the conversation. Then maybe you could then follow up with a "how often do you go?" or something non-judgemental that doesn't imply anything.

 

Yes, we can probably assume all the ladies on here are diligent but I think some clients just might want the warm fuzzy feeling from having the discussion.

 

I think that's a wonderful approach. For me, the reason the question can get my back up, is because it's asked with no disclosure from the man asking. So it's like... there's an implied assumption that I may have something, but of course, no possibility he might.

 

So asking in the way you suggest would completely alleviate that negativity, and instead turn it into a rational conversation between two people talking about sex. I like it :D

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Guest realnicehat
I admit I think I live in a bit of a cloud when it comes to this. I get tested every two months, and assume everyone knows that, and I also assume my clients get tested (although not as regularly). I completely assume that because of my reputation on here, clients will know I am a responsible, smart, healthy provider, and therefore, of course I get tested, and only engage in covered intercourse.

 

If someone tells me they want to book, but first want to know if I'm 'clean', or 'do you get tested', I can sometimes take offence to that. I once said to someone 'I wouldn't advertise on here if I was selling dirty sex, and I would never ask a client when he'd last been tested', or something like that. I admit that was an over-reaction, but... well, it WAS my reaction.

 

I do think it's something people should be able to talk about on here, but my advice is be careful if approaching a provider before an encounter. I know I'm not the only one who can have, and has had, the above reaction to that question. We work hard to show you who we are, and we work hard to provide our clients with safe and professional service. Sexual health is of the utmost importance - so we can get offended if you question that. We are human. Now, I know some gentlemen may think 'What's the big deal, we should be able to ask that'. But the only answer I can give is... well that was my honest reaction to that question. Overreaction? Maybe. But honest reaction? Yes.

 

I don't think it is an overreaction at all. While it is nice that the gentleman is concerned about his health, he is probably unaware that the question he is asking carries with it a certain implication. With what he probably feels is an innocent request he has questioned your intelligence, professionalism and integrity.

 

Would that same person ask their surgeon if he had washed his hands? I think everyone finds it aggravating when they are questioned on their abilities as a professional. You just want to say "This is what I do. Now get out of my way and let me do it." It is hard to bite your tongue sometimes.

 

I think it is great that you "own" your reaction and sharing it here will help people see how touchy a topic it can be.

 

I also think Eric Northman is on the right track with his suggestion. Now if he could just get his TV namesake to stop being such a sensitive pussy and go back to being the badass he was all would be right in the world.

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Well I get tested once every two months (I have to get blood levels taken for a medical condition I have, unrelated to this) and while at the lab getting my blood levels done I get tested for STD's/STI's. Now I don't go announcing my sexual health to the companions I see, nor do the ladies announce their sexual health to me. But should I test positive for something god forbid, I would contact the ladies I've seen and let them know.

Everyone's sexual health is their own responsibility, but, and just my opinion, if you did test positive for a STD/STI, let your past partner(s) know, and your current partner(s) know before an encounter.

A rambling

RG

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I tend to come from the POV that you can't rely on the other person to be getting tested, and for many clients they really do not know where to go other than their family doctor, and it isn't something they are ever going to bring up. Part of being the responsible sp is getting tested for peace of mind as much as anything else, another thing is safer services, or fully educating ourselves about what the implications of low risk, medium risk and high risk activities really are.

 

 

This isn't a place to stick one's head in the sand, it is the place to be able to have open discussions about the topic with clients one on one and face to face, and let them know what their testing options are that can retain their privacy, but also give them peace of mind.

 

 

For the casual caller asking whether we are clean or whatever, I usually reply asking them what possible answer from any sp do they expect to hear? No? Aint going to happen. It is a pointless and useless question that isn't going to do a thing for them. Better to visit the sp, and see for themselves what they do and what they do not do, and get a really great sense of their attention to their own health that way.

 

 

For example, and i don't think sps here go to this extreme, but on a show about a brothel in Australia, before proceeding with any appointment, the sp gets down with a bright light and does at the very least a thorough visual inspection of the client.

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I'm just curious if this sort of discussion ever comes up when a guy goes to a bar to pick up a woman or someone, man or woman, goes on a dating site to find a date, or relationship or if someone just dates. Not saying a discussion of STD/STI is wrong, but why the focus of STD/STI only when it comes to seeing professional companions, especially since, at least in my experience, the ladies are far more religious about safe sex practices than ladies seen in conventional "civilian" dating.

Just a rambling

RG

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I'm just curious if this sort of discussion ever comes up when a guy goes to a bar to pick up a woman or someone, man or woman, goes on a dating site to find a date, or relationship or if someone just dates. Not saying a discussion of STD/STI is wrong, but why the focus of STD/STI only when it comes to seeing professional companions, especially since, at least in my experience, the ladies are far more religious about safe sex practices than ladies seen in conventional "civilian" dating.

Just a rambling

RG

 

 

 

People are afraid to be seen to 'offend' the civilians, but a lot of people don't care if they offend an sp. Also, being a sex worker, they feel a bit more at east in asking the question, as tho it is something that can be asked of an sp, not a non sp.

 

There can be more than one answer to why not,. But at the core, in the civilian hookups, someone doesn't want to bring up the use of a condom for fear of making it sound like they believe the other person 'has something' and will be offended by this. Also there is a belief that they can 'tell', just by looking.

 

http://www.plosone.org/article/info%3Adoi%2F10.1371%2Fjournal.pone.0042009

 

interesting research in Thailand.

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According to "The Eric Northman Law of CERB Circlejerks", we should need approximately 3 or 4 more posts on this STI/STD thread before it degenerates into an argument about BBBJs.

 

I'm starting a pool. Who wants in?

 

;-)

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I think another question that begs to be asked is what if you do catch something? As a SP do you tell your previous clients so they can get checked and as a hobbyist do you tell the SP's you've been with? I think it is great that people get checked (as I do) but the harder part is if someone catches something as I would imagine being an SP and revealing that to a previous client could perhaps destroy their chances of continuing to be a SP? It is a touchy subject, but yet, I think the proper thing to do would to let people know if you contracted something.

 

 

Once, about three years ago, I got an email from a client saying he'd gotten chlamydia and just to be safe I should get tested. I didn't have anything, but I appreciated the email. If you're adult enough to be fucking, and adult enough to get tested, then I think we should all be adult enough to inform our partners if we've caught something.

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I totally agree with everyone on this thread. As a hobbiest I do get tested and I hope most other hobbiests do as well. One of the things I like about CERB is that everyone is very open about subjects like these and I Know that the SP's that are on CERB for the most part are very professional ladies and they take care of their health. We, as hobbiests should remember that and do the same. If you do contract something, it is very important that you contact the people you have been with to let them know. It is just the right thing to do.

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