Who is the best incall to go the first time

[antlerman 17064]

no one has a better insight (got the word right this time) than our Cat.......:bowdown:

[jughead 45]

I have asked women out (girls when is school) and have been hurt (too much leading with my heart I guess) but have found out this WOMEN CANNOT BE TRUSTED.

 

A SP in not a substitute for a Girlfriend.

 

With an Sp I know exactly what to expect no BS no head games.

 

I agree it is easy pick up a phone, send an email and you got it.

 

It is a quick fix.......like a drug almost...................

 

If a guy is just looking to loose his virginity with no peer pressure, no head games he can control when, where, whom. Seeing an Sp is an option maybe even learn something.

 

It can be like fulfilling a fantacy, every guy know it look at a picture of a supermodel, a hot babe on TV and wish you could spend the night, heck even an hour in bed with her, it can be erotic.

 

It can also be bad most of us know it, I once seen a street walker (stupd move) she just bent over and said lets get it over with............never again web site like this are valuable tools to help avoid dangerous situations and stupid mistakes.

 

I read some where that when guys need "it" the most, that women want to have nothing to do with them it's like they know. It was suggested that before a first date that the guy goes to a Sp get that over with before hand that way the guy can focus on his date and get to know them with any of the other stuff getting in the way and reduce the possibility ending things right off the bat with a dumb move, improve your odds of make in a long term relationship.

 

Here is one web site that I found helpfull.

 

http://sex.perkel.com/escort/index.htm

 

Cat does speak words of wisdom

 

This one sbout dating is a real nice thought might have saved me alot of hurt over the years.

 

"It can be daunting, and most would benefit from having an accredited mental health care professional on board to help"

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

FYI there are alot of indy girls who are real and genuine who love what they do on CL!

[m**k 153]

What is necessary is a life skills plan that enables them to move thru the steps and acquire the confidence and know how necessary to interacting with women.

I often give the analogy of sitting at a piano and learning to play Chopsticks in a 10 minute lesson. Even if you practice it every day, you can?t say ?I play the piano?.

 

Cat

 

At the risk of being too much of a contrarian...most men can barely play Chopsticks...and are just happy to mash at the keyboard until it makes some kind of sound...then they scratch themselves, belch and/or fart and go to sleep.

 

monk

[cat 262460]

I have asked women out (girls when is school) and have been hurt (too much leading with my heart I guess) but have found out this WOMEN CANNOT BE TRUSTED.

 

 

Darling jughead,

 

It is deeply saddening that this is your perception of half the planet, but I don't think you actually believe it. We all have an innate need for connection, and I am sorry your experiences have been difficult. I for one, do not envy men the task of dating women. I still don't understand the complexities that make up the way most women think. For me women are much like computers, I admire all that they are, but I never feign to understand the hows and whys. What I do know is that it's never too late to upgrade the skills needed to enjoy either. What I find helps is realizing its an ongoing experience that changes moment to moment. You are right, with an SP there are no head games. But will she sit at your bedside when you are sick? Will she be there when the sky is dark and there is a storm coming? I'm not saying we do not have our place in the lives of our guests, but we are more likened to a rental or a lease not a purchase.

 

When it comes to trust I always remember that every day millions of people drive 80kms/hr down roads with a simple painted line to ensure oncoming traffic doesn't hit them head on. If you drive, you can trust. Give it a chance and trust, what you put out there will come back to you...I promise.

 

Cat

[etasman2000 15994]

I have asked women out (girls when is school) and have been hurt (too much leading with my heart I guess) but have found out this WOMEN CANNOT BE TRUSTED.

 

One of the best advice a wise man once gave me was "there is no rejection only selection"

[Banks 117]

Here Are The Top Reasons Why Men Fail With Women And How To Make Sure YOU Avoid Every One Of These Deadly Common Mistakes?

-By David DeAngelo, Author Of Double Your Dating

 

MISTAKE #1: Being

Too Much Of A Nice Guy

Have you ever noticed that the really attractive women never seem to be attracted to "nice" guys?

 

Of course you have.

 

Just like me, I'm sure you've had attractive female friends that always seemed to date "jerks"? but for some reason they were never romantically interested in YOU.

 

What's going on here?

 

It's actually very simple?

 

Women don't base their choices of men on how "nice" a guy is. They choose the men they do because they feel a powerful GUT LEVEL ATTRACTION for them.

 

And guess what?

 

Being nice doesn't make a woman FEEL that powerful ATTRACTION.

 

And being NICE doesn't make a woman CHOOSE you.

 

I realize that this doesn't make a lot of logical sense, and it's hard to ACCEPT? but GET OVER IT.

 

Until you accept this FACT and begin to act on it, you'll NEVER have the success with women that you want.

 

MISTAKE #2: Trying To

"Convince Her To Like You"

What do most guys do when they meet a woman that they REALLY like? but she's just not interested?

 

Right! They try to "convince" the woman to feel differently.

 

Well, I have news for you? YOU WILL NEVER CHANGE HOW A WOMAN "FEELS" WHEN IT COMES TO ATTRACTION!

 

Never, ever, EVER.

 

You cannot CONVINCE a woman to feel differently about you with "logic and reasoning".

 

Think about it.

 

If a woman doesn't "feel it" for you, how in the world do you expect to change that FEELING by being "reasonable" with her?

 

But we all do it.

 

When a woman just isn't interested, we beg, plead, chase, and do our best to change her mind.

 

Bad idea. One that will never work.

 

MISTAKE #3: Looking To Her

For Approval Or Permission

In our desire to please women (which we mistakenly think will make them like us), us guys are always doing things to get a woman's "approval" or "permission".

 

 

Another HORRIBLE idea.

 

Women are NEVER attracted to the types of men who kiss up to them? EVER.

 

Don't get me wrong here.

 

You don't have to treat women BADLY for them to like you.

 

But if you think that treating a woman well means "always getting her approval and permission for things", think again.

 

You will never succeed by looking for approval. Women actually get ANNOYED at men who seek their approval.

 

Doubt me? Just ask any attractive woman if Wussy guys who chase her around and want her approval annoy her?

 

MISTAKE #4: Trying To Buy Her

Affection With Food And Gifts

How many times have you taken a woman out to a nice dinner, bought her gifts and flowers, and had her REJECT you for someone who didn't treat her even HALF as well as you did?

 

If you're like me, then you've had it happen a LOT.

 

Well guess what?

 

It's only NATURAL when this happens?

 

That's right, I said NATURAL.

 

When you do these things, you send a clear message:

 

"I don't think you'll like me for who I am, so I'm going to try to buy your attention and affection".

 

Your good intentions usually come across to women as over-compensation for insecurity, and weak attempts at manipulation. That's right, I said that women see this as MANIPULATION.

 

MISTAKE #5: Sharing

How You Feel Too Early In

The Relationship With Her

Another huge and unfortunate mistake that most men make with women is sharing how they "feel" too early on.

 

Attractive women are rare.

 

And they get a LOT of attention from men.

 

Most men don't realize this, but attractive women are being approached in one way or another ALL THE TIME.

 

An attractive woman is often approached several times a DAY by men who are interested. This translates into dozens of times per week, and often HUNDREDS of times per month.

 

And guess what?

 

Attractive women have usually dated a LOT of men.

 

That's right. They have EXPERIENCE.

 

They know what to expect.

 

And one thing that turns an attractive women off and sends her running away faster than just about anything is a guy who starts saying "You know, I really, REALLY like you" after one or two dates.

 

This signals to the woman that you're just like all the other guys who fall for her too fast? and can't control themselves.

 

Don't do it. Lean back. Relax.

 

There's a much better way?

 

MISTAKE #6: Not Getting How

Attraction Works For Women

Women are VERY different from men when it comes to ATTRACTION.

 

 

You need to accept this fact, and deal with it.

 

When a man sees a beautiful, young, sexy woman, he INSTANTLY feels a sexual attraction.

 

But does the same apply for women?

 

Do women feel sexual attraction to men based mostly on looks? Or is something else going on?

 

Well, after studying this topic for over five full years now, I can tell you that women usually have their "attraction mechanisms" triggered by things OTHER than looks.

 

Have you ever noticed that you see a lot more average and unattractive men with beautiful women than the other way around?

 

Think about it.

 

Women are more attracted to certain qualities in men? and they're attracted to the way a man makes them FEEL than they are to looks alone.

 

If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman.

 

But it's not an accident. You have to LEARN how to do this.

 

And ANY guy can learn how?

 

MISTAKE #7: Thinking That It

Takes Money And Looks

One of the most common mistakes that guys make is giving up before they've even gotten started? because they think that attractive women are only interested in men who have looks and money? or guys who are a certain height? or guys who are a certain age.

 

 

And sure, there are some women who are only interested in these things.

 

But MOST women are far more interested in a man's personality than his wallet or his looks.

 

There are personality traits that attract women like a magnet?

 

And if you learn what they are and how to use them, YOU can be one of these guys.

 

YOU DO NOT have to "settle" for a woman just because you aren't rich, tall, or handsome.

 

Let me say this again: If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly,you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman.

 

MISTAKE #8: Giving Away

All Of Your Power To Women

Earlier I mentioned that it's a mistake to look to a woman for approval or permission.

 

 

Well, another similar tactic that a lot of guys use is GIVING AWAY THEIR POWER to women.

 

Said differently, guys try to get women to like them by doing whatever the woman wants.

 

Another bad idea?

 

Women are NEVER attracted to men that they can walk all over? Women aren't attracted to Wussies!

 

MISTAKE #9: Not Knowing EXACTLY What To Do In Each Type Of Situation With Women

Now I'm going to blow your mind?

 

 

A woman ALWAYS knows what you're thinking.

 

Women are approximately TEN TIMES better than men at reading body language. That's ten TIMES.

 

I know, it might be hard to believe. But for example, if you're out on a date with a woman, and you want to kiss her, she knows it.

 

And if you don't know exactly what to do and exactly HOW to kiss her, and you just sit there looking at her and getting nervous, she won't help!

 

And this goes for ALL aspects of women and dating?

 

Approaching a woman, getting her number, asking her out, kissing her, getting physical? everything.

 

If you don't know what to do in each situation, you will probably screw it up? and LOSE EVERYTHING.

 

And you KNOW it.

 

It is VITALLY important that you know EXACTLY how to go from one step to the next with a woman? from the first meeting, all the way to the bedroom.

[curious2 323]

Ummm, seriously? Dating & relationship advice on this board in a thread entitled "Who is the best incall to go to the first time?"

Posted via Mobile Device

[Banks 117]

Ummm, seriously? Dating & relationship advice on this board in a thread entitled "Who is the best incall to go to the first time?"

Posted via Mobile Device

I don't know if there is such thing as "best incall" for the first time...

[jughead 45]

Cat,

 

"TRUST AND RESPECT ARE EARNED NOT BESTOWED"

 

Sure I know it's only half the women on the planet cannot be trusted. The ones that can be trusted and that are worth while are happily married.

 

I would describe myself as a typical Pisces. I was raised with old fashioned values, I was taught that if you gave your word "yes I will help you.....what ever" you did it and there was never an excuse that was acceptable for not doing what you agreed to. I was taught to have a work ethic and all of that stuff.

 

John Lennon once said "Life it what happens when your busy making plans"

 

I am I where I wanted to be in life Heck no but I am not going to lose any sleep over it worrying it or about being single. I am of the opinion that thing happen for a reason and on there own time.

 

I have my support network in place, my parents, my sisters, and close friends, if I need a shoulder to cry on, or some one to talk to I know where to go.

 

Is there someone out there for me to make a connection with......sure there is, but in my past experiences have hurt me deeply and I tend to be more careful now a days. I do tend to trust people but I temper that with caution based on past experiences.

 

Am I some what jaded toward women sure am I put limits in place to protect me from being hurt and the limits only get less over time as trust and respect are earned. Example I know a lady whom gives Seated Chair Massage the lady gets darn close I was very jumpy at first. When she would shift her weight during the massage the odd time she wold brush up against me, I would jump because I did not know her or trust her. Now years later I do not even notice if she does even brush against me because I trust her, She has earn it.

 

I only see an Sp when I am in need...I do not hobby on any sort of regular bases I understand that it is only an temporary relationship for a given period of time. It would be stupid to expect a longterm caring relationship would ever come out of it. I am well aware that it is easy for men to fall for professional women in their lives such as RMT's , Sp it is too easy to mistake that there is more going on then really is.

 

Thanks for your wisdom and wise word cat.

 

 

Darling jughead,

 

It is deeply saddening that this is your perception of half the planet, but I don't think you actually believe it. We all have an innate need for connection, and I am sorry your experiences have been difficult. I for one, do not envy men the task of dating women. I still don't understand the complexities that make up the way most women think. For me women are much like computers, I admire all that they are, but I never feign to understand the hows and whys. What I do know is that it's never too late to upgrade the skills needed to enjoy either. What I find helps is realizing its an ongoing experience that changes moment to moment. You are right, with an SP there are no head games. But will she sit at your bedside when you are sick? Will she be there when the sky is dark and there is a storm coming? I'm not saying we do not have our place in the lives of our guests, but we are more likened to a rental or a lease not a purchase.

 

When it comes to trust I always remember that every day millions of people drive 80kms/hr down roads with a simple painted line to ensure oncoming traffic doesn't hit them head on. If you drive, you can trust. Give it a chance and trust, what you put out there will come back to you...I promise.

 

Cat

[dt5494 290]

For a first time with an SP I would recommend, Emma Alexander or Rachelle Reigns.

[Grass_Hopper 18263]

I like you, already, but hey!, the poor guy must be mortified by this time!!!

 

:twisted::twisted::twisted:

[E*****s**r 210]

"TRUST AND RESPECT ARE EARNED NOT BESTOWED"

 

I never did agree with this statement (on respect not trust)and until recently didn't quite know how to put my view into perspective.

Luckily I found someone who did a nice job for me :)

(granted it's out of context but you'll get the idea)

 

“What keeps [him] safe is his ability to show respect for anyone he meets. He is a man of charm, who holds well his personal pride. He grants respect at the outset of a meeting and continues that respect until the person forfeits it. This is very different than the way most people view the world. Most people insist that respect has to be earned, and with many, I have come to observe, earning it is no easy task! Many demand that anyone desiring their friendship first earn their respect, and I can understand their point of view, and once believed that I held one similar….

 

[He] takes the opposite approach, one of acceptance and one lacking initial judgement. This may seem a subtle alternative, but it most certainly is not. Would that the man be anointed a king, I say, for he has learned the secret of peace. When [he] enters a tavern of common peasant thugs, most within the place, and society at large, would view him as superior. And yet, in his interactions with these people, there is no air of superiority about the man at all. In his eyes and in his heart, he is among peers, among other intelligent creatures whose paths have led them to a different – and not better or worse – place than his own. And when [he] grants respect to men who would think nothing of cutting his heart out, he disarms them, he takes away whatever reason they might have found to fight with him…"

 

. R.A Salvatore, Drizzt Do'Urden Saga

 

(Meant as a general thought)

If people demand to earn their respect, I say, that in itself is cause for me to not want it. Why are you/they so much better than everyone else that I must earn your consideration and politeness.

[Guest]

Poor Soleil is probably scratching his head thinking WTF. I just want to get laid, lol. To me a relationship works best if you try to fix yourself and learn from the last one. I'm sure Soleil has good relationships in his life and just wants to get laid. We all have problems in our life and in our relationships. That is why it is fun just to let go, have fun and call a good sp.

 

P.S. You look like you need a hug.

[Banks 117]

I like you, already, but hey!, the poor guy must be mortified by this time!!!

 

:twisted::twisted::twisted:

Well then maybe you and I should have a "first time" lol

 

But on this note... I wonder where Soleil is?

[cat 262460]

My approach to the world is an uncommon one, and not all share or understand it. For me, respect is given, regardless of the persons behavior towards me. Trust is always given at the start and then it may shift, but it is always there. The shift lies in where the trust is applied. Those that have unpredictable behavior patterns can be trusted to be unpredictable. Eveningstar's quote is wonderful when showing respect at it's finest.

 

I think what I have tried to convey, tho not as succinctly as I would like is that what you put out there comes back. Not just the actions, but the emotions. We have all heard the adage "actions speak louder than words" and it is absolutely true. We have friends with jugheads values and ethics, they are the people we know we can count on. We forget however that emotional energy is as real as physical energy, and it emanates out into the world and can enhance or infect every situation we enter into. Acceptance of what is, inner non-resistance to the moment and non-judgment are the keys to finding peace. Carrying baggage from the past that does not bring quality to the moment is simply going to weigh down and clutter what could be. Our job is to identify when that is happening.

 

Just my take on the world, and I'm sure Soleil never intended this thread to become anything close to what it has. I for one have really enjoyed everyone's input and honesty. That in itself is an accomplishment...

 

cat

[jughead 45]

I am not saying that I am better that anyone else, I am just stating my views.

 

You are not going to hand over your credit card to someone you just meet, but to your long term relation ship you will because you trust them that they are going to max it out and walk and never see you again.

 

At my last job I worked the better part of 20 years for a company that I DID NOT like the owner. But I did show him the courtesy he deserved as the owner of the company. Did I respect him for paying me straight time when it should have been paying overtime.................... no sir.

 

I respect honesty, I respect hard work, I respect my friend who will insist that and totaly believe that ........the sky is pink.........and be totally wrong. He has the convictions to stand up for what he believes in right or wrong.

 

From

Wikipede

 

Respect is esteem for, or a sense of the worth or excellence of, a person, a personal quality, ability, or a manifestation of a personal quality or ability.

 

Trust may refer to:

• Trust (social sciences), relationship of reliance
  

You can find other definations of those words but what it boils down to is this. You got to get to know someone before you can say I trust and respect him/her.

 

Showing common courtesy (respect) to some one you just meet is only good maners. The meaning of the word respect changes depending on in what context you are using it in. There is a different in showing respect for someone and telling them that you respect them for who they are.

 

Would you respect the person who just stole your wallet with $1000 in it?

 

Would you show that person respect if you just caught him/her stealing it?

 

Now if you drop you wallet with $1000 and a stranger hand it back and the money is still there would you show them respect? Would you tell them so?

 

Interesting eh!

 

Any how I agree this tread has morphied from that it started out to be.

 

My suggestion........for Soleil only you can select someone, message some of the Sp's here online and talk with them be honest at what you are looking for but most of alll when you do decide to take the plung.......ENJOY!

[E*****s**r 210]

I am not saying that I am better that anyone else, I am just stating my views.

 

I did not direct my comment towards you

 

In any event if one does not read what is written, then assumes what they wish, that is their perogative.

I'm not here to tell people how to live, only my views.

[jughead 45]

Eveningstar

 

I did read your post I did not take it personally and just responded to what you had posted. I simply fell that most people misuse and misunderstand the meaning of the word Respect.

 

Also you did post the following statment.

 

 

(Meant as a general thought)

If people demand to earn their respect, I say, that in itself is cause for me to not want it. Why are you/they so much better than everyone else that I must earn your consideration and politeness.

 

Consideration and politness are only good maners but are NOT they same RESPECT.

[goose2ca 458]

Well, getting this thread back to "who would you recommend?", I would recommend Shy! She always has a nice place, her personal hygiene is excellent and she is a knockout beauty with great bedside manner.