What's your poison?

[Guest *Ste***cque**]

There have been a few threads on here that discussed "illusions of passion" vs GFE terminology as well as a recent one in the Ottawa section about blurring the lines between clients and SP's.

 

I've commented on both those threads and received a little flak for some of my comments. Nothing serious, just further discussions via pm where I explained my personal views on this business. They are that this is a business transaction, a very personal one but at it's core it's a business. If I have any doubts I just need to ask to see you outside this arrangement to be set straight. My main question is does it make it easier for the SP to try and develop a deeper connection with the client or would you prefer to keep it at the very personal business level? Sure, lot's of fantasies can take place and we can let our imaginations run wild for the hour, but does the SP really want to encourage connections?

 

I realize this isn't helping the fantasy along but I thought it might be a good idea to get some ladies views on this business as relates to connections. Do you want us to try and make that connection or not? As a client I ask this since I don't want to pressure you down a path if that makes it more difficult for you, in what can be a trying business. Or maybe you want and encourage a connection?

 

I'd like to know.

[Elle Diablo 1345]

I prefer to encourage a connection between myself and a patron, but that most definitely depends on the guy - is he into developing a connection or does he just want to get laid?

 

When I think a 'connection' would be a good thing to start nurturing is when the guy turns into a regular and wants to see me more often than not. Some may say that is 'leading', but I would respond with, "What is your agenda?" In essence my only purpose is to make an enjoyable moment spent between two adults, hopefully, temporarily forgetting that it is a business transaction.

 

Wouldn't you agree that most of everything that conspires between people is often spurred on by fantasy?

[CristyCurves 169032]

I'm not sure if I'm understanding your question correctly, if you are asking if I would encourage after business companionship with a client, I would say no. There is an old saying in this business that goes " men pay us to leave" and I'm happy for this! I love the men I interact with, some have been better than others, that's the way it goes, but when the time is up so is the connection. I still think it was all great and would want to do it again, see them again, but in a paid relationship only. I love my freedom, my "no responsibility" type lifestyle. I don't need anything complicating it:)

If you are asking does encouraging a connection create more chemistry I'd also say no . Either there is chemistry or there isn't. We all play out our sessions differently, I'm not a good actress so what you see is what you get, if its there its there if it isn't it isn't. I won't pretend to be or to do anything to create an illusion of any type of relationship.

[Guest B**na***oy]

I'm not sure if I'm understanding your question correctly, if you are asking if I would encourage after business companionship with a client, I would say no. There is an old saying in this business that goes " men pay us to leave" and I'm happy for this! I love the men I interact with, some have been better than others, that's the way it goes, but when the time is up so is the connection. I still think it was all great and would want to do it again, see them again, but in a paid relationship only. I love my freedom, my "no responsibility" type lifestyle. I don't need anything complicating it:)

If you are asking does encouraging a connection create more chemistry I'd also say no . Either their is chemistry or their isn't. We all play out our sessions differently, I'm not a good actress so what you see is what you get, if its there its there if it isn't it isn't. I won't pretend to be or to do anything to create an illusion of any type of relationship.

 

My kind of woman. ;-)

[Guest *Ste***cque**]

When I boil it down, I am asking if you are OK with a customer expecting a connection to be part of the session, since that's what many SP's imply in offering a GFE? To me it seems wrong to expect it on a first time meeting, yet it's offered. Is it too invasive or are you fine with it? Just another form of roleplaying?

[CristyCurves 169032]

When I boil it down, I am asking if you are OK with a customer expecting a connection to be part of the session, since that's what many SP's imply in offering a GFE? To me it seems wrong to expect it on a first time meeting, yet it's offered. Is it too invasive or are you fine with it? Just another form of roleplaying?

 

No. I don't want my clients to expect anything but good service and for me to be myself with them. To expect a connection is much like expecting to win the lotto, imo. We can both hope for one, as a connection makes sex so much better however you are meeting with a stranger, someone with whom you've met briefly online through posts, emails, phone calls etc. So to expect anything beyond good service is preparing yourself for a possible let down. Gfe sessions don't imply we offer a connection, for me they mean I'm going to be more open, uninhibited, more romantic, but a connection, well if it happens great, can't and shouldn't be promised. After all its not something that can be acted or roleplayed imo. A connection is something that's natural that just happens between two like individuals, its chemistry:)

[Nicolette Vaughn 294340]

I see what you're saying...To answer your question, a connection has to be developed. This can be evident from the first encounter through chemistry but the good connections develop over time.

 

I have many great connections with my regular clients but *they* know it doesn't go further than the SP/client relationship meaning they come to see me with anticipation, we have a lot of fun and we go our separate ways until the next time.

 

I wouldn't view having a connection with a client as leading someone on as long as both parties know what the score is. Most of my clients are married and have no interest in an emotional attachment with me outside of what other than we do during our time together. My clients have an affection for me and I know that they care about me to a certain degree. I had one recently boost my vehicle with his after the light was left onside all night.

 

Imo, a connection cannot be considered role-playing and that to me implies that it is something phony. There has to be some chemistry there to begin with. I've had clients come and go where there wasn't much going on in the chemistry department at the beginning but they returned again and again where a connection slowly developed over time. I've also had clients come and return just for the service where it is friendly but we both know that they want the service without te connection. And in my experience there are varying degrees of connections. Some are friendly, some are hot and heavy and some are intense but the key is the connection that occurs during that time stays within that time until both SP/client meets again.

[Guest realnicehat]

When I boil it down, I am asking if you are OK with a customer expecting a connection to be part of the session, since that's what many SP's imply in offering a GFE? To me it seems wrong to expect it on a first time meeting, yet it's offered. Is it too invasive or are you fine with it? Just another form of roleplaying?

 

Hey Steve,

 

sorry if this is a hijack, and maybe I'm just behind on my reading, but is there a thread somewhere where guys are saying they expect a connection with a GFE session?

 

My take has always been that a lady offering GFE services may provide a higher level of intimacy but in my mind a "connection" has never been implied.

 

I've been doing this on and off for several years, and while I've had many intensely intimate or affectionate encounters I have only felt what I believe to be a true connection a few times. Those experiences were completely unexpected but a happy surprise.

 

I know you asked your question to the ladies (although I hope my input isn't unwelcome) but I guess I'm wondering where it comes from.

 

Now that I think of it I may have used the word "connection" in other threads where another word may have served better. Perhaps some of us are throwing it around too often?

[roamingguy 300292]

My take on it for whatever it's worth. This lifestyle and business (yes, let us not forget it is at it's core a business) is very unique and unlike any other business that I can think of. There are some gentlemen who seek out a lady for sex, and nothing more. And there are ladies who provide sex only and nothing more. And that is a mutually beneficial arrangement for both the lady and gentleman and there is nothing wrong with that.

But there are gentlemen who seek out, for lack of a better word, companionship. And there are ladies who provide companionship. Usually it is ladies who offer what is a GFE. And not a rule, but in my experience, this GFE has turned out to have no menu, the encounter unfolds naturally Companionship to me is two adults seeing one another and seeing if you click/connect. That doesn't happen with every lady you'll meet, nor does it happen with every client the lady sees...it is that something undefined, and natural, call it chemistry if you will. If you two like each other's company, the gentleman will call the lady for a second, third, forth etc encounter. And why see a lady for repeat encounters. It has to be more, much more than just sex and looks. If it was just sex, that is really just a physical act. If just looks, well there are a lot of beautiful women here. But a lady offering companionship, and it evolves. That means the gentleman feels relaxed to open up and talk to the lady. And the lady feels relaxed and opens up too. There is obviously trust and respect between the two, and it may evolve to a friendship within the confines of this lifestyle. I emphasize that because the friendship first should be it's own reward, no special expectations nor asking for discounts from the lady...that to me is despicable and something a gentleman and friend would never do. And second, the friendship still respects the boundaries in this lifestyle. You don't see her in the lady's civilian life and she doesn't see you in your civilian life. But when you do see each other, it is in paid encounters, it's just the encounter is two friends getting together, not a SP meeting a client

So short answer (after I catch my breath here LOL) is yes I certainly think

a connection can be made between a lady and gentleman. Obviously chemistry plays a big part in this connection, not every lady and gentleman will connect beyond the immediate encounter. The fact that at it's core this is a business transaction, to me doesn't diminish any connections made. Looked another way, this business has allowed the gentleman to meet a lady which has developed into, because of chemistry, a connection, maybe a friendship.

A long winded rambling

RG

[Guest webothscore]

There are many facets to this, but to simplify, I will briefly expand on only two.

 

1) People can get it on without the emotional aspect and both be completely satisfied physically, and if that is what's on the table, great.

 

2) Some like to end off having a "glow" after an experience because there was a "wow" factor due to a deeper connection, which is also fantastic.

 

I have mentioned before that while I can adapt to either one, I am more of a lover than a fu**er. I guess this is a question we can all ask ourselves. To me, that's the core this all comes down to. Now, to combine both emotions, have a FU**ing LOVEly night ;)

[Guest *Ste***cque**]

Thanks for your comments everyone. I really appreciate hearing all points of view on this.

 

I have been on here for a while and I do read a lot of posts talking about how the lady likes to establish a connection or how important they are. I just saw an ad yesterday from a lady visiting my home town which talked about how important a connection was to her.

 

I usually book with a single polite email and confirm the day of the appointment to get location details. I show up, greet her with a friendly peck, take care of the financial side, ask to grab a shower, come back and we talk for a minute and away we go. I shower afterwards, give her another kiss and politely say goodbye. No connection, just consensual sex, which is how I would prefer it. I'm married and don't need the connection and I usually only see a woman once as I don't want to risk an attachment.

 

I just wondered if the ladies would prefer I try and build a connection with friendly emails leading up to the date and a lot more time getting to know one another, instead of my current approach? I'm not losing sleep over this, just mostly curious as I would just like to make sure the lady enjoys her time with me, hence the question. I wouldn't want to make her job more difficult.

 

Thanks again.

[CristyCurves 169032]

 

I just wondered if the ladies would prefer I try and build a connection with friendly emails leading up to the date and a lot more time getting to know one another, instead of my current approach? I'm not losing sleep over this, just mostly curious as I would just like to make sure the lady enjoys her time with me, hence the question. I wouldn't want to make her job more difficult.

 

Thanks again.

 

To answer your question I think it would depend on the lady, not being evasive but since I can only speak for my self I'll say I like your method. I want to know only enough about you to make me feel comfortable and safe with meeting you. If I can see your picture and read posts etc then that's even better that will give me a sense as to our possible chemistry. But one email with the pertinent information is also fine and more than satisfactory. Leaving some things to the imagination can heighten the excitement of a meeting, for me anyways:)

[Midnite-Energies 110563]

@stevemcqueen, honestly, it doesn't matter what the lady wants, it matters what YOU want. If you want to only see a lady once and move on, keep it entirely sexually based and leave no room for a connection of any sort to develop, than that is the way you should behave. You are not making promises or being phony, you are utilizing the aspects of this business that fit your needs. This means you may have to pick and chose between ladies and pass over those who are seeking to make connections but that is the beauty of this industry, you can have your needs met in whatever way you choose. You just have to find a match for those needs.

 

There are a variety of ladies here, some who prefer GFE, some PSE, for me it's a VPE in that I adapt to whatever you're seeking while still being myself. There is someone for everyone and as such, no right or wrong, it just IS what it is.

[Elle Diablo 1345]

For there to be a connection made between two people does not necessarily lead to a commitment. The nature of the relationship is only dependent on the consent given. A paid companion should know the boundaries she is implementing intimately, considering she thinks it's her responsibility to cater to and be somewhat intuitive of her patrons' needs. Emotion does not always have to be unharnessed to be enjoyed.