Blow Job Technique Requests

[Wolf Knight 29667]

This one is both guys and ladies to comment on.

 

I've never been a huge fan of BJ's. I'm not completely sure why but I assume that it 's because I've not completely enjoyed the technique used by the lady. To a certain degree most ladies have a technique that they use and I guess that they assume that their specific technique is enjoyable given that it's been successful for them in the past. In fact some ladies I'm sure would think that they give awesome BJ's.

 

I have had some BJ experiences that quite frankly were not only not enjoyable but actually uncomfortable and I've had to move the lady on to other activities to spare myself. However, recently in the middle of a lack luster BJ I decided to take control of the situation and provide "direction" to a lady on how to provide a BJ that I would enjoy. LOL, while she was proceeding I gave her detailed instructions on how I liked it how much pressure to use, what speed, how wet, and specific tongue techniques etc. What was a poor BJ turned in to a awesome one.

 

I guess enjoyable BJ technique is something that is specific to each man so as a lady it might be difficult sometimes to determine what technique to employ to make it enjoyable for the man.

 

A question I have for the ladies is would you find it rude for a man to interrupt your BJ technique by providing direction to you on how you should provide one to him?

 

Also, gents can feel free to comment on their BJ experiences and perhaps some techniques that they preferred to others. For example, Deep Throat has always baffled me as I've ALWAYS found it uncomfortable given my size so I always cringe when a lady tries it.

 

Cheers

[Guest]

I would have no problem with someone instructing me on what they want. Communication is very important in this industry. The person your with may not know that you don't like something that they are doing and they might learn something new by your instructions. Sex is about playing and learning someone's body and like you already said we are all different. I see no problems at all with good communication.

 

This goes with everything in the bedroom. I think communication is important. You might be missing out on something you really enjoy if you don't ask.

[Midnite-Energies 110563]

I think this is an excellent question to raise. I've always found it interesting when it comes to women the norm is "every woman is different, learn your woman" especially in regards to oral sex but you never hear the reciprical comment geared towards men.

 

Every man is different. No two men masturbate the exact same way so why would we think they like to be sucked the same way.

 

I have techniques I like and enjoy but I always look, listen and feel for cues. Sometimes it is difficult and direction would be great. HOWEVER, like most things, it depends on how the direction is offered. There is a proactive shared communication and there is a "jerk with an attitude" type. Most people would not react well to the latter and it would definitely spoil the mood rather quickly.

 

Sex is all about exploration and finding what's pleasurable and enjoyable. Communication and direction applies to everything: BJ's, oral, nipples, kissing etc. We are all different and we all react differently. I LOVE having a cock in my mouth and I believe I'm good at what I do because I am passionate about it and try to be tuned in. I always say once you believe there is nothing left to learn, it's time to die.

 

As for deep throat, it depends on the cock. With men of size, depending on the throat, it can be uncomfortable where for another shape/size, it's heaven. Sex should never cause pain (unless you're into those aspects of BDsM) so if it's feeling uncomfortable or even painful, please stop it.

 

I'm very interested to see more replies to this topic.

[Luckyme 41401]

I would have no problem with someone instructing me on what they want. Communication is very important in this industry. The person your with may not know that you don't like something that they are doing and they might learn something new by your instructions. Sex is about playing and learning someone's body and like you already said we are all different. I see no problems at all with good communication.

 

This goes with everything in the bedroom. I think communication is important. You might be missing out on something you really enjoy if you don't ask.

 

This is so nice to know, ie. instructing, or at least coaching. I have been very reluctant to interfer or give advice what a lady is doing, afterall, they are the pros. and I am not. It happened to me once that the lady was using a bit too much force and I could feel her teeth. It was very uncomfortable and unpleasant, and needless to say, I have never seen her again. Now I know what I should have done :icon_redface:.

[Wolf Knight 29667]

Midnite, I think you could be right in that providing direction to a lady is all about the delivery of the direction.

 

For me it was more of a "Oh baby, that feels good now just a little softer and slower with your hand. Yeah that's it. Ooooh, don't be afraid to make it wet baby. Oh yeah, now slower and swirl your tongue around the head. Oh God that's so good!" (and so on, and so on as we progressed)

 

Basically, it turned into a tailor made BJ exactly the way I like it.

 

When it comes to sex I've never been a fan of trial and error. I like a lady to provide direction to me that will help me along my way when trying to provide her pleasure. I would be very embarrassed to know that a lady might be rolling her eyes at my technique so I'd rather she just tell me.

[Guest]

This is so nice to know, ie. instructing, or at least coaching. I have been very reluctant to interfer or give advice what a lady is doing, afterall, they are the pros. and I am not. It happened to me once that the lady was using a bit too much force and I could feel her teeth. It was very uncomfortable and unpleasant, and needless to say, I have never seen her again. Now I know what I should have done :icon_redface:.

 

I wouldn't be too hard on yourself. There's no right or wrong when experiencing this industry.

 

I don't see anything wrong with politely asking for what you want or saying I really like this or that.

 

Even though we are the experts, we are always learning, just like any other job. In other jobs you would have refresher courses or new courses to be the best worker you can be. Us escorts can be the best we can be by listening to our clients. I hope that makes sense.

 

Like nlwoodchuck said when he gave instructions he really enjoyed the service he was receiving. So maybe a polite tip or two could be helpful for both the client and the escort. Who knows you may really like the girl and build a better connection by saying what you want.

[Wolf Knight 29667]

Like Peachy said communication is key always.

 

Another aspect that I thought I'd comment on as an aspect of a BJ is the balls licking and sucking. With many men licking play with the sack is pleasurable. However just like woman with anal, ball sucking is usually a love it or hate it type thing. My nuts don't like pressure and sucking LOL. In fact it can cause discomfort even if a lady licks or plays with them a little too rough. I'm sure that there are guys who actually find hard sucking of the nuts enjoyable just not me. Hell, if a lady sucked on one of my nuts hard I'm pretty sure I'm going limp right after.

[Guest]

Like Peachy said communication is key always.

 

Another aspect that I thought I'd comment on as an aspect of a BJ is the balls licking and sucking. With many men licking play with the sack is pleasurable. However just like woman with anal, ball sucking is usually a love it or hate it type thing. My nuts don't like pressure and sucking LOL. In fact it can cause discomfort even if a lady licks or plays with them a little too rough. I'm sure that there are guys who actually find hard sucking of the nuts enjoyable just not me. Hell, if a lady sucked on one of my nuts hard I'm pretty sure I'm going limp right after.

 

That's a great point about B.L.S. Just like nipples balls(lol) can be sensitive to the touch and this would defiantly be a good thing to know in advance as it can be painful and just not fun. I know some men have very sensitive shafts and if you touch it a certain way it can be painful and for other men you can squeeze the penis so hard, you feel like it's going to come off, lol. Different strokes for different folks, so let us women know what stroke you want, big smile.

[roamingguy 300292]

Well I'll offer up my two cents here. Except for three bj's, I enjoyed every one I received. One was bad because the lady was not gentle, in fact it hurt...even telling her go easy, she would go easy, then back to hard and hurting. The other, well the encounter went sour from the get go (no I won't say who or why) and no intimate act that day was going to be good.

But in fairness there was a lot of YMMV that day, and I was probably as much at "fault" for lack of a better term for a bad encounter as she was.

And the third, my first in this lifestyle, well she started, maybe would go about 30 seconds, stop, take a break, then start again (note to CERB members, avoid CL ladies LOL)

Fortunately I haven't needed to give BJ technique requests, they were all pleasurable (except for the three) enjoyable and most of all, a very giving intimate gift, yes gift on the part of the lady

What I've wondered, is how I do with my oral techniques. Would a lady feel comfortable telling a client what he is doing wrong and how to improve. Now mind you, different ladies like different things. One lady liked a certain act which if I did that to another lady I'd likely get kicked out of her incall and on her black list. But anyhow question is, would a lady feel comfortable telling a client what he could do to improve, what he is doing wrong and what he is doing right?

A quick rambling and I hope not a hijack

RG

[Guest]

I have had gentlemen ask me to give them technique advice because they were inexperienced and wanted to learn. I have had guys wanting to know what I like, so they can please me. I also have no problem with this. The thing about it though is that I tend to enjoy what the person is doing and unless the person really needs the tip, I just enjoy.

[Wolf Knight 29667]

Well I'll offer up my two cents here. Except for three bj's, I enjoyed every one I received. One was bad because the lady was not gentle, in fact it hurt...even telling her go easy, she would go easy, then back to hard and hurting. The other, well the encounter went sour from the get go (no I won't say who or why) and no intimate act that day was going to be good.

But in fairness there was a lot of YMMV that day, and I was probably as much at "fault" for lack of a better term for a bad encounter as she was.

And the third, my first in this lifestyle, well she started, maybe would go about 30 seconds, stop, take a break, then start again (note to CERB members, avoid CL ladies LOL)

Fortunately I haven't needed to give BJ technique requests, they were all pleasurable (except for the three) enjoyable and most of all, a very giving intimate gift, yes gift on the part of the lady

What I've wondered, is how I do with my oral techniques. Would a lady feel comfortable telling a client what he is doing wrong and how to improve. Now mind you, different ladies like different things. One lady liked a certain act which if I did that to another lady I'd likely get kicked out of her incall and on her black list. But anyhow question is, would a lady feel comfortable telling a client what he could do to improve, what he is doing wrong and what he is doing right?

A quick rambling and I hope not a hijack

RG

 

RG, as I said I hate trial and error when it comes to sex so with a lady that I have a "different" type of relationship with (we're very playful and silly even at the intimate moments) I have actually outright asked her to critique me on my technique. In that case she "walked" me through a whole session and gave me lots of points and tips. Overall I found out I was pretty good at it LOL but did pick up a few special tricks (specifically clues to watch for when to employ certain special techniques). I'm never too good to be told and I'm not too proud to ask.

 

Communication, communication, communication.

[Guest webothscore]

Great topic. While some, or even many would say they prefer a bj over sex, I would not be one of those. Have I had insanely amazing? Of course, but I can count more experiences in my life where I experienced slight displeasure in oral as compared to sex. This is solely my experience, so my opinion is therefore biased. Teeth in way and bending backwards too much have adverse affects, and I ask myself as a super extrovert how I could have been so silent in those cases. While communication is key, I guess I didn't want to make people feel bad so I took a "hit" on my own experiences. Then when we read how genuine Peachy and Midnight are about communication, I guess it would have been easy to find a lighthearted and tactful way of saying something.

[roamingguy 300292]

RG, as I said I hate trial and error when it comes to sex so with a lady that I have a "different" type of relationship with (we're very playful and silly even at the intimate moments) I have actually outright asked her to critique me on my technique. In that case she "walked" me through a whole session and gave me lots of points and tips. Overall I found out I was pretty good at it LOL but did pick up a few special tricks (specifically clues to watch for when to employ certain special techniques). I'm never too good to be told and I'm not too proud to ask.

 

Communication, communication, communication.

 

At least I haven't got the tap, ever, touch wood

A Seinfeld episode for every occasion

Just thrown in for a bit of humour

But I do agree with you NLWC about communication.

RG

[Luckyme 41401]

Although I was a bit green in giving instruction, I have learned over the years to take cues from the ladies in terms of nipple and daty plays. When a lady pushes your head gently away from her nipples or says it is sensitive, it is time to stay off the area for a while. The same with daty, after her O or after a while, it is usually sensitive time and it is crucial to take the hint and give it a break.

 

Like RG says, it is also nice to get feedbacks from a lady. So far, I have received comments like, "I like the way you kiss and touch here, it is so sensual", " I like you using your fingers to squeeze like this", and " I like your technique, I have been looking forward to seeing you,". These comments are gratifying and they make the whole experience that much more enjoyable. However, if I need improvement in some areas, a constructive criticism is also very helpful and welcome, I do not mind at all. :icon_smile:

[Jabba 18389]

In my youth, I used to think there was no such thing as a bad BJ.

 

With more experience under my belt (pun), I've come to realize some techniques can make a BJ unpleasant.

Unpleasant = teeth. During one such tooth session, I provided feedback to my SP, but to no avail. I finally had to request a change in venue. Fortunately, that experience was by far the exception.

 

The remainder of my experiences range from ok to mediocre to exceptional. What makes for an exceptional BJ you might ask? I believe it's when the SP accurately reads her client's responses. Pleasure cues are often subtle, so the true professional needs to appreciate and interpret non-verbal communication. Body language, posture, positioning, facial expressions, silence, breathing, hand guidance - it's all part of the equation.

 

Is it a science? Nope.

An art - I believe so. But you decide.

[Wolf Knight 29667]

I believe it's when the SP accurately reads her client's responses. Pleasure cues are often subtle, so the true professional needs to appreciate and interpret non-verbal communication. Body language, posture, positioning, facial expressions, silence, breathing, hand guidance - it's all part of the equation.

 

Is it a science? Nope.

An art - I believe so. But you decide.

 

You're exactly right. There is no "one BJ fits all" approach and if a lady thinks this then there will surely be some disappointed men on the other side of her lips. However if you're a client that's not vocal or expressive it might be hard for a lady to please you. I'm not much of a "dirty talk" man but during a BJ it's a great opportunity to be more expressive for the lady and give her some not so subtle clues to help her help you LOL.

 

Even maintaining the right balance between mouth and hand technique through out the duration of the BJ can be difficult for example I enjoy both hand and mouth to be soft and sloppy at the beginning with the lady using a little bit of a twisting motion with her mouth and hand on my shaft (and I'd want it to stay this way if I'd don't want to cum from BJ). However, if I'm looking for BJ to completion a little ways into the BJ I'll want her to tighten her grip a little and increase her actual suction. The whole process is an evolution that starts and finishes differently. Also eye contact, periodic eye contact is good and natural for me but constant eye contact will freak me out and will seem forced LOL.

[Guest]

Like many of these threads common sense to you may not be so common to others. Like Nlwoodchuck stated some gentlemen are not so expressive and it may be hard to pick up on cues. You also have to remember that the escort may be meeting this person for the first time and that not everyone expresses themselves the same way. As an escort I rely on picking up on cues quite a bit but I'm not a mind reader. As Nlwoodchuck has stated how he enjoys his blowjob from start to finish, someone else may not enjoy that at all. It is really helpful to know what special things clients enjoy for example twisting on the penis, swirling your tongue around the head, ect, ect. It just might make a okey blowjob into a great blow job.

[Midnite-Energies 110563]

I'm loving all these comments and discussions...like DUH, I love cock!

 

Thanks for bringing up the BLS as I enjoy this as part of the overall lovin'. I find ball play is even more highly specific then a blow job and the one aspect I want input. I've found balls can range from "don't even look at them the wrong way they're so sensitive" to "put on those boots and trample me". I've had those who love to be licked but not sucked, sucked but not licked, hands only and everything in between.

 

I do want to say, on a personal note, that I want to please you and would very much prefer communication, even if it has to be a forceful STOP, over suffering through. Sometimes I know I can be a little intense and I have thought to myself on an occasion or two whether I was reading or misreading cues; only human and all. If I'm being too intense or teasing too much, I would rather know especially if I am misreading. As Peachy said, we are always learning and growing and just because one is a professional, does not mean learning has stopped.

 

Communication really is the key especially if you're only seeing someone every now and then. The longer the interactions and more frequent, the greater the ability to "learn" someone. Just remember to make the learning part of the fun and not a put down, demand or other negative aspect. let's share the pleasure, giving and receiving.

 

Oral anyone??? *rawr*

[piano8950 32577]

I think everything I would say has already been said here. But just want to give another shout out to BLS.

[Guest realnicehat]

But anyhow question is, would a lady feel comfortable telling a client what he could do to improve, what he is doing wrong and what he is doing right?

RG

 

In my first meeting with a particular Cerb lady I had been performing oral on her for a little while (which she seemed to be enjoying immensely) when she said "same speed, just a tiny bit softer". I happily obliged and within seconds she was having a fantastic orgasm.

 

I love receiving a little direction, especially if that is the result. We talked about it after and she jokingly called herself selfish, saying she was never shy about asking for what she needed to "get there". What made it even better is the next time I knew what she liked.......

[Wolf Knight 29667]

In my first meeting with a particular Cerb lady I had been performing oral on her for a little while (which she seemed to be enjoying immensely) when she said "same speed, just a tiny bit softer". I happily obliged and within seconds she was having a fantastic orgasm.

 

I love receiving a little direction, especially if that is the result. We talked about it after and she jokingly called herself selfish, saying she was never shy about asking for what she needed to "get there". What made it even better is the next time I knew what she liked.......

 

I couldn't agree more! That type of direction is perfect and usually nobody would take any offence to comment of that type. As a rule we (both clients and companions) just want to please each other so any direction will usually be welcomed if spoken in the proper encouraging way. Even if you're a fantastic lover and extremely adept at picking up physical cues it can be hard from one person to another to hit all the right buttons in all the right ways. I guess hence why all my best encounters have been on repeat visits.

 

I have been with ladies that I have found very frustrating because they presented very few clues as to how I was performing. Likewise I'm sure some companions find certain clients frustrating when she's pulling out all her best moves LOL and not getting the response that she deems appropriate. It all could easily be fixed a few select words murmured into the ladies ear. Speak up guys and ladies get exactly what you want. "Ask and ye shall receive".

[PistolPete 61421]

Blow job technique requests you say........

 

yes talking is good especially if its dirty talk :) Or silence is okay too, I find if she uses too much hand I will tell her, and if does it again, I just get up and get my belt off my pants a tie her hands up so she using her mouth only...you know like "Look no hands" :) YES to BLS when I say to lick and suck my balls, she does it, and pays great attention to entire area, as I love it. Oh don't forget to come back up, and bite my nipples lightly, and give me deep french kiss too while she is giving a BJ. :)

 

 

Just like a lady like having her pussy sucked and licked, it is not just one area, it is the entire pussy,around her inside of her legs...please each other by saying "Fuck yes I like that" Or "More" Or "Oh yes oh yes,right there baby don't stop" or you can say....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................nothing...................................

[Jabba 18389]

Blow job technique requests you say........

 

yes talking is good especially if its dirty talk :) Or silence is okay too, I find if she uses too much hand I will tell her, and if does it again, I just get up and get my belt off my pants a tie her hands up so she using her mouth only...you know like "Look no hands" :) YES to BLS when I say to lick and suck my balls, she does it, and pays great attention to entire area, as I love it. Oh don't forget to come back up, and bite my nipples lightly, and give me deep french kiss too while she is giving a BJ. :)

 

 

Just like a lady like having her pussy sucked and licked, it is not just one area, it is the entire pussy,around her inside of her legs...please each other by saying "Fuck yes I like that" Or "More" Or "Oh yes oh yes,right there baby don't stop" or you can say....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................nothing...................................

 

ok...I'm wet.

Thanks Pete :p

[fiskaa 2600]

Not sure if this has already been mentioned but one thing that definitely turns me off when receiving oral is gagging...I know sometimes it just happens but still a turn off for me. However some guys love that experience....to each his own.

[Eva Laperle 7898]

First thank you all for this thread awesome discussion!

 

I find that the beauty in this industry is that no one does it the same..! I relate to sex the same way I talk about food.. at the end were talking about eating something!! lol The point is that not everyone enjoys the same restaurants!( Some are more popular than others !!) what makes a good restaurant? Service, Ambiance and Quality is what I look for usully... For a good service and a great BJ I think it works the same its not only about the strokes and the motion and the way she does it but also the will to please! I don't mind constructive criticism but like we say in french " Le ton fait la chanson.. " the way the delivery is done changes everything... The same way you Gents don't like the bad sassy attitude of some SP's the same way I don't like when men give me bad attitude when I am servicing them. Why? Simply it does not make me want to go the extra mile for him its a simple turn off! I love what I do and like Peaches said I love Cock!! Duh !! I find that there is a difference between the girl that just wants to pay the bills Vs the one that like what she does. When enjoying what you do the attention given to the other person is stronger and therefore better!

 

For the technical part I would say that its not only about the shaft and oral sex is not about one spot and one technique... The whole body gets involved... from my breast touching your inner thighs while I have it between my lips to the soft touch of my hand on your skin, it involves the whole body.

 

I'm curious to know what you guys think about the eye to eye contact when receiving a BJ?