blue_eyes56 2010 Report post Posted October 19, 2009 I am a new user who joined last month. After poking around and learning from others, I?ve decided to start contributing to share my perspectives and experiences. This is my first post. I?m in my early 50?s, my S.O. relationship is under reconstruction, and I?m really questioning things I?d always taken for granted. That?s a lot of crap floating around in my head, but fortunately it motivates me to live a little more in the moment. I mean, fuck, if I can?t enjoy each day NOW, when will I? I stumbled across CERB in August and my first impressions bordered on voyeuristic ? all these juicy details, the women, stuff happening right here in Ottawa! That was fun for a bit, but then I wrestled with actually joining and becoming a ?hobbiest?. Was this wrong? What about my S.O.? How would this change me? It?s all still a work in progress, but I look at ?hobbying? very differently than just a month ago. The women I?ve met through CERB have been friendly, caring, and talented (Michelle, thank you for the warm welcome!) while the people who write reviews have been unbelievably helpful. It truly is a community where all members ? hobbiests and MAs/SPs - gain from the sharing of information and building of trust. Also, it feels ?normal?, even sensible, to spend time with these lovely ladies so they can work their own brand of magic to make us feel very, very good. I never thought I?d be interested to see an SP, but their liveliness and uniqueness jumps out at you from reviews and their own posts. Instead of saying ?Why would a stranger want to have sex with me??, I now think ?Whoa, she?s funny, smart, sexy AND she wants to make me feel good.?). This could get expensive! More to come ? 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
coachg 388 Report post Posted October 19, 2009 Welcome to Cerb...it is a great community with many fine people...who freely offer their insight, their experiences, their humor and lot's of great advice to make the hobbying experience a safe and memorable time. The ladies one gets to meet are fabulous and very real individuals who provide all kinds of entertainment. Enjoy the llife my friend...it is a great time. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TracieGold 282 Report post Posted October 19, 2009 Darling you are a sweet heart.....welcome to our place and have all the heart you need to keep it positive....yes, I am 45 and I enjoy it and look forward each day.... Love and hugs to you Trace:-P Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emma Alexandra 123368 Report post Posted October 20, 2009 We are all pretty sane on here well maybe not Antlerman but he's another story...have fun and enjoy all you can. We only live once ...:wink: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
antlerman 17064 Report post Posted October 20, 2009 We are all pretty sane on here well maybe not Antlerman but he's another story...have fun and enjoy all you can. We only live once ...:wink: you nasty little sex vixen....how dare you compliment me like that and not be here to ......well........to..help...me....you know......uhhmmm......pass the kleenex please Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
antlerman 17064 Report post Posted October 20, 2009 hey blue eyes...welcome to our little world. Yes this is a little voyeuristic...that is part of the fun. it is all baby steps you take and at any time you need to step back...you do....never let the hobby control you or ruin your look on life and commitment......let it help you through it..... 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
coachg 388 Report post Posted October 20, 2009 hey blue eyes...welcome to our little world. Yes this is a little voyeuristic...that is part of the fun. it is all baby steps you take and at any time you need to step back...you do....never let the hobby control you or ruin your look on life and commitment......let it help you through it..... Those are pretty profound words of advice there, Antlerman...you are a very diverse creature...from running a poll about nothing to alleviate your boredom, to doling out powerful advise about life...WOW. My hat is off to you big fella....you continue to amuse the hell out of me. Have a good one. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
blue_eyes56 2010 Report post Posted October 21, 2009 Thanks to everyone for the wise and welcoming comments. Two things I?ve noticed in my brief time on CERB are honesty (many would find that ironic) and a healthy dose of irreverence. Snooping around a few weeks ago in the ?bi-weekly awards? thread, I came across a post where hobbiests and SPs alike shared how they got started in this area. I was disarmed by the openness people showed about their own roots and motivations. At the same time, though, the board is littered with jokes and light humor - good to see people don?t take things too seriously ... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Grass_Hopper 18263 Report post Posted October 29, 2009 ...It's threads like this one that helps me remember why I love my job so much... I hope you have a wonderfull trip to the world of hobbying... :mrgreen: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mister C 1725 Report post Posted October 29, 2009 It is an awesome community. Enjoy yourself. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
blue_eyes56 2010 Report post Posted November 2, 2009 First off, I must confess to making a few rookie mistakes along the way, largely a result of thinking too much or not thinking enough. I now see that hobbying is not all that complicated but knowing a few key things is critical. I?ve had wonderful sessions and surprisingly found the greatest pleasures have been small, unexpected moments. For example, I had the most amazing foot massage where my feet have never been so loved or sensually caressed ? Frankly, a lot of this feels surreal. Here?s a scene: I?m showering with a lovely lady at the conclusion of our time and we?re talking about the nature of long-term relationships; I mention some of the issues with my S.O.; we discuss this as she rubs body wash onto my chest; she then asks thoughtfully ?Have the two of you ever thought about swinging?? ... Without answering that last question quite yet, that made me think of an old Playboy cartoon: an elderly gentleman is naked in bed with a young, buxom blonde, his hands fondling her huge breasts as he says ?My wife doesn?t understand me.? I can relate! This raises the question: do men ever talk about their S.O. while hobbying, or was that just another rookie mistake?? Life can be so interesting ? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CourtesanCassandra 167 Report post Posted November 9, 2009 do men ever talk about their S.O. while hobbying, or was that just another rookie mistake?? The way I see it is you've just engaged in an intimate act with someone. You tend to open up a little, especially if you are comfortable with her. I've quite often had my clients, including regulars, open up a little about their so's or other personal problems. I try & lend an empathetic ear when a client opens up like that. I definitely do empathize with ones who do have troubles with their so's, as I've been there myself. I don't see it as a mistake, I actually feel good about the fact that someone feels comfortable & safe enough to open up to me like that. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Grass_Hopper 18263 Report post Posted November 9, 2009 do men ever talk about their S.O. while hobbying, or was that just another rookie mistake?? Life can be so interesting ? I agree with Cassandra... If you feel cormfortable to talk about her, go ahead... It's intimacy and confidance, I think... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
antlerman 17064 Report post Posted November 10, 2009 ................................ I can relate! This raises the question: do men ever talk about their S.O. while hobbying, or was that just another rookie mistake?? Life can be so interesting ? Life is indeed interesting..... Do we men talk about our SO's....some do...some don't..... It all depends on the situation and the topic.....the wonderful ladies I have seen have often given some great inside womanly advice on many topics. These ladies are amazing "therapists" in thier own way and I thank them all the time for it....... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites