zinga 133 Report post Posted November 24, 2010 I am a new member here and new to the whole SP thing, I haven't been with an SP (YET), so I don't have any references with them nor do I think providing my cerb handle at this point in time would alleviate any concerns an SP may have until I become a regular poster here. I am nervous about meeting a prospective SP for the first time, so I can imagine what some of you SPs have to go through each time you meet with someone new for the first time. For the most part, as I've looked around the different ads, I see most SPs don't ask for a reference of any kind. I don't see a problem with the ones that do want a reference though. Perhaps they have had too many problems with first time clients. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
namssa 562 Report post Posted December 18, 2010 Hi zinga, Welcome to CERB I hope you enjoy your time here. As a new member with no references and very few postings, it can be difficult to see the occasional SP if they request one. When I started a few years ago, I was in exactly the same situation. I read the boards thoroughly for about 3 months to absorb all the information and techniques for how to approach this hobby. Although you don't need to read for that long, I would suggest reading quite a lot in the beginning, especially the newbies section and learn all that you can, it will pay off in spades down the road. Although I am not quite sure how it works in the Ottawa area, I can pretty much tell you what you need to do in order to become successful seeing SP's and getting those references. After you have a good feel how CERB works and have a good feel for things, find a good quality lady to see that does not require a reference, suggest one that has good recommendations here, you are attracted to and meets any other requirements you have. Note any requirements she has for contact, meeting, donations, etc. and follow them. Be polite when you contact her, be very clear in what you are looking for and understand what she is offering in a session. When you have found the girl you want, book a session, make sure you are very well groomed, dressed nicely, polite and friendly when you meet. Arrive a few minutes early if you are going to see her, and follow her rules (phone or text when you are near, etc) for contact, be very discrete if you are seeing her at her hotel or incall. When you get to her door, knock quietly and wait, it will seem like a long time, but it is not, lol. When the door opens, she will likely be behind it and poke her head out....smile and quietly say, "hi", and in you go. After the session, if you had a great time, take a few minutes and post a recommendation on CERB of your experience. The next thing you should do is contribute to the board whenever you can with accurate and positive information. Become a regular contributor, the girls will read and note your posts and your recommendation will be noted in memory of future girls that you see. Build a good, solid reputation as a great guy for the ladies to see and as a good contributor to CERB. If you do the above, you will be able to use many of the girls that you have seen for a reference, but make sure you ask them and have their approval before you use them as one. If you do the above, it will take you a long way to seeing the ladies that request a reference and you will be able to provide one with ease and confidence. After some time, your reputation may precede you and in some cases you may not be asked for a reference even though the lady states that she needs one. I have been very lucky, seen some awesome girls and have a pretty good reputation on some "other" boards (working on my reputation here as well). I pretty much have followed the above and have only ever been asked for a reference twice. I did provide a reference of an awesome SP that I have seen many times, (she is my ATF GFE girl) for the one request, and saw the lady that I wanted to see. The other I declined as I was not that interested, so I took a pass. I think I covered the most important points above, but may have missed a thing or two, perhaps someone can add to this. I hope the above may help you in your endeavour to see some of these fine ladies. namssa I am a new member here and new to the whole SP thing, I haven't been with an SP (YET), so I don't have any references with them nor do I think providing my cerb handle at this point in time would alleviate any concerns an SP may have until I become a regular poster here. I am nervous about meeting a prospective SP for the first time, so I can imagine what some of you SPs have to go through each time you meet with someone new for the first time. For the most part, as I've looked around the different ads, I see most SPs don't ask for a reference of any kind. I don't see a problem with the ones that do want a reference though. Perhaps they have had too many problems with first time clients. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shy_Choice 158 Report post Posted December 20, 2010 Bare minimum to me should be as follows: Home calls; called from a listed number from the same address as the call location. Both I will search via google. Hotel call; called from the room phone leaving name and room number. I always call back via the hotel phone anyways. I always perfer hotel calls and if I am not 100% satisfied on a home call that I will be safe....Forget it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CaptJaG 299 Report post Posted December 21, 2010 I cant believe that people have issue with this heh. I mean, I know that I'm just getting into this but the reccomendation has to go both ways. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thedriver 6179 Report post Posted January 5, 2011 I can understand that some SP's want references but what some people look at as good references are not always possible or even reliable. Examples: Home #: I do not have a home phone so forget matching it to an address or name. Like many people today I only have a cell phone. Work #: like others I share a work phone with many others and all incoming calls are answered by my supervisor and personal calls are frowned upon. Work cell phone#: again personal calls not allowed and it is a blocked#. SP references: Though I have already met with a few SP's from this site I am sure they would not know who I am and could not vouch for me even if I give my CERB handle. As you can see I have not been on CERB very long. Also I can only afford to see an SP three maybe four times a year so they most likely would not remember me. Cerb Handle: For the SP's that advertise in other ways than just on CERB can not expect that the clients calling even know about this site much less have a Handle. Having been hobbying for over 20 years and because we did not have sites like this or even access to the internet I used to rely on Newspaper adds. I had to make a judgement on the add, call the girl and ask questions then make a decision on that information. Unfortunately I have been robbed and often girls have misrepresented themselves. So as you can see I am very sympathetic to the Ladies but it can be very difficult to come up with a system that works for everyone. Just my 2cents Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted January 5, 2011 I too, have a cell phone, which is also my home phone. That isn't the issue. Blocked numbers are. The lady wants a number to show up in case she keeps getting calls but no shows. Cell phone numbers do show up Reference. Ask the lady you saw to provide a reference to the lady you want to see. She must know you by some sort of name/contact info. But no lady will vouch for you if they only know you through posts on CERB. The vouching comes after meeting you, if you ask her to give you a reference I have developed on line rapport through CERB with a couple of ladies, but even so, they still require (and got) a reference for upcoming encounters. Some people are different behind a computer screen Some ramblings past my bedtime RG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
namssa 562 Report post Posted January 5, 2011 I can certainly understand where you are coming from, thedriver. It can sometimes seem to be a daunting task to come up with a reference for some SP's. Given your situation, this is what I would do, if I had a similar dilemma. I would research and find a local SP that you could see a couple times a year and could build a rapport with over time. You could have something positive about you that stands out in her mind, so that she remembers. Ask if you can use her as a reference once in a while. Keep in contact with her occasionally via PM or email so she remembers you. If you do use her as a reference, ensure that you send her a message ahead of time, so that she is aware to expect an inquiry. If everything goes well and you get to see the new girl, drop your reference a quick thank you note. Also, most SP's will work with you if you have a "situation". Another thing you can do is become an active, positive and regular contributor to CERB and she can see your personality and general attitude. I have been lucky enough to be able to use my posts on a forum as a reference of sorts to see a new girl. Hope this helps. namssa I can understand that some SP's want references but what some people look at as good references are not always possible or even reliable. Examples: SP references: Though I have already met with a few SP's from this site I am sure they would not know who I am and could not vouch for me even if I give my CERB handle. As you can see I have not been on CERB very long. Also I can only afford to see an SP three maybe four times a year so they most likely would not remember me. Cerb Handle: For the SP's that advertise in other ways than just on CERB can not expect that the clients calling even know about this site much less have a Handle. So as you can see I am very sympathetic to the Ladies but it can be very difficult to come up with a system that works for everyone. Just my 2cents Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Reddog01 30280 Report post Posted January 5, 2011 I can understand how an SP would like the reassurance a reference may bring to a new meeting. I admit I research potential SPs thoroughly and seek out reviews if available to satisfy my own comfort level. One SP requested that no reviews be written on her as she views all interactions to be private between consenting adults. I saw her anyway based on my on my own instincts and had a wonderful time. I am glad to see that some of the SPs are confident to trust their instincts and ?gut feel? or I would have never had my first experiences. To be honest, my ?hobby? history is not that extensive and has been usually on the road and not in my own backyard. I don?t mention my CERB handle because I never bring this Board up so in my case a reference might be hard to secure without having to connect the dots. I will have to work on getting a reference the SPs will trust on this Board. Maybe a New Year's resolution.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thedriver 6179 Report post Posted January 6, 2011 Thanks Namssa for your input. Just to clarify, I was just giving a different side to the discussion to cover some points that affect some guys out there that are new or perhaps not even n CERB. I was trying to cover all the points that came mind. Personally I have been able to meet with every woman that I have wanted to so far without issue including GrassHopper who started this thread.:-D The discussion did touch me in a way because I was thinking that if ever I wanted to meet with one of the SP's who required a background check of sorts, it might prove difficult as the only SP from CERB that I have seen more then once and who would know and vouch for me is now retired. The other SP that could do the same was from CL and quit the business and moved away. I miss them both very much!:-( Of course the other challenge for me personally is that I like to try new girls always looking for that new high, searching for that passionate connection. I also travel a little and seek to satisfy my cravings when I am in a new city. The fact that I can only afford to indulge a few times a year means I see SPs from Ottawa maybe once or twice a year. I am not complaining in any way. As I said I was just trying to give a different view on things. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DukeSSk 3430 Report post Posted July 2, 2012 ***BUMP*** I thought I'd bump this instead of starting a new one. I have some related questions. I didn't start this thread, so I'm obeying the bumping rules (I hope, lol!!) When a lady gives her blessing to act as a reference. What's the usual procedure? What is the communication flow? Is it: 1) The gentleman says to a new SP: "Please feel free to contact reference SP for a reference. I've seen her this many times, etc...", or 2) The gentleman asks reference SP to contact new SP to confirm all is well, rules were obeyed, etc...? Another concern is when it has been many months that you've seen the reference SP and/or you don't hobby often: - Is it the gentleman's responsibility to regularly follow-up with reference SP(s), let's say every 1-3 months,to say "Hey, remember me, can you still vouch for me?" - I'd assume that gentlemen are expected to retain copies of PM/emails to confirm past appointments should reference SP can't remember, correct? What if it's a SP that only uses the phone!? This would be an issue, what then? Call history and texts are always deleted, and rightfully so. Do most ladies have some sort of record-keeping process in place to track whom they see? Whom they've agreed to vouch for? I understand that this question could be perceived as wanting to know some "security/trade secrets" better left in the SP-only forums, I'd appreciate, so will all the other gentlemen, if basic info/tips could be shared. In general, as long as things went well, do the ladies always agree to act as references? Help us help you feel safer!! :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted July 2, 2012 (edited) ***BUMP*** I thought I'd bump this instead of starting a new one. I have some related questions. I didn't start this thread, so I'm obeying the bumping rules (I hope, lol!!) When a lady gives her blessing to act as a reference. What's the usual procedure? What is the communication flow? Is it: 1) The gentleman says to a new SP: "Please feel free to contact reference SP for a reference. I've seen her this many times, etc...", or 2) The gentleman asks reference SP to contact new SP to confirm all is well, rules were obeyed, etc...? Another concern is when it has been many months that you've seen the reference SP and/or you don't hobby often: - Is it the gentleman's responsibility to regularly follow-up with reference SP(s), let's say every 1-3 months,to say "Hey, remember me, can you still vouch for me?" - I'd assume that gentlemen are expected to retain copies of PM/emails to confirm past appointments should reference SP can't remember, correct? What if it's a SP that only uses the phone!? This would be an issue, what then? Call history and texts are always deleted, and rightfully so. Do most ladies have some sort of record-keeping process in place to track whom they see? Whom they've agreed to vouch for? I understand that this question could be perceived as wanting to know some "security/trade secrets" better left in the SP-only forums, I'd appreciate, so will all the other gentlemen, if basic info/tips could be shared. In general, as long as things went well, do the ladies always agree to act as references? Help us help you feel safer!! :) My experience and practice is when contacting a new lady who requires a reference, provide all other verification information (name, phone, email, board handle confirmed via pm) I let her know a reference is forthcoming but I wish to contact the lady first (IMHO seems a bit rude if a lady is contacted out of the blue by another lady to provide a reference for a guy, without being asked if it's ok first) and ask for her permission to use her as a reference I would think it's up to the lady who requires a reference to contact the reference provider, a reference provider shouldn't be obliged to contact the lady. Now if you have no one who can provide a reference for you, there are some on line verification sites (date check is one I believe) that you can join. My advice is be as forthcoming and open as possible with the lady. Starting off your encounter before you even meet by compling with verification requirements leads to a trusting SP/Client relationship and a good if not great encounter when you do meet My morning rambling RG Edited July 3, 2012 by r__m__g_uy 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DukeSSk 3430 Report post Posted July 2, 2012 My experience and practice is when contacting a new lady who requires a reference, provide all other verification information (name, phone, email, board handle confirmed via pm) I let her know a reference is forthcoming but I wish to contact the lady first (IMHO seems a bit rude if a lady is contacted out of the blue to provide a reference) and ask for her permission to use her as a referenceI would think it's up to the lady who requires a reference to contact the reference provider, a reference provider shouldn't be obliged to contact the lady. Now if you have no one who can provide a reference for you, there are some on line verification sites (date check is one I believe) that you can join. My advice is be as forthcoming and open as possible with the lady. Starting off your encounter before you even meet by compling with verification requirements leads to a trusting SP/Client relationship and a good if not great encounter when you do meet My morning rambling RG Alright, timing must be perfect for your first point: You'll need to set up something with the new SP, then get the green light from reference SP, then new SP must carry out her verification procedure... I think it would only be considered rude if reference SP can't remember you, then you're looking at a ton of drama :( Hence my questions about monthly follow-ups or if there's some sort "record-keeping" process used by the ladies?!?! Ya, I was leaning towards 1), but I wanted to know what others thought. Thanks for your input. I'd love to hear more feedback and input!! :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fortunateone 156618 Report post Posted July 2, 2012 Alright, timing must be perfect for your first point: You'll need to set up something with the new SP, then get the green light from reference SP, then new SP must carry out her verification procedure... I think it would only be considered rude if reference SP can't remember you, then you're looking at a ton of drama :( Hence my questions about monthly follow-ups or if there's some sort "record-keeping" process used by the ladies?!?! Ya, I was leaning towards 1), but I wanted to know what others thought. Thanks for your input. I'd love to hear more feedback and input!! :) I don't think you need a monthly follow up. If you plan to use an sp as a reference, and your contact has been email, then save your confirmation/last date email exchange with that sp. Go find it when you need a reference, and send your request as a reply. All of the info about dates, times, who you are, etc will be within that email, which should serve as a reminder as to who you are (her own replies will show that she saw you). After an appt, you may wish to follow up with an email thanking her for her time and ask if she is reference friendly if needed. When you do contact her again, give her to time to reply to agree to serve as your reference. Keep in mind some won't reply or agree or may just not reply to the sp asking, for whatever reason, so it is a good idea to always have 2 prepared. Once you get that cleared up, provide her with the name of the escort (s) that you are planning to contact so she knows to expect request only from those sps. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DukeSSk 3430 Report post Posted July 2, 2012 I don't think you need a monthly follow up. If you plan to use an sp as a reference, and your contact has been email, then save your confirmation/last date email exchange with that sp. Go find it when you need a reference, and send your request as a reply. All of the info about dates, times, who you are, etc will be within that email, which should serve as a reminder as to who you are (her own replies will show that she saw you). After an appt, you may wish to follow up with an email thanking her for her time and ask if she is reference friendly if needed. When you do contact her again, give her to time to reply to agree to serve as your reference. Keep in mind some won't reply or agree or may just not reply to the sp asking, for whatever reason, so it is a good idea to always have 2 prepared. Once you get that cleared up, provide her with the name of the escort (s) that you are planning to contact so she knows to expect request only from those sps. Ya, this would be the best of course of action. Although, it appears to be tedious with lots of back-and-forth, like I said earlier, timing must be perfect. I would think that the majority of the ladies would agree to act as references, given the camaraderie amongst the ladies that I've seen here... Just to be clear, I have no problem with being asked for references, I just wanted to share my thoughts in an attempt to improve the process for all parties involved. Thanks for your reply :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted July 2, 2012 Most ladies don't have a problem providing references. And it's more than just comraderie. It is the ladies helping each other with each other's safety/security. The lady providing a reference today for another lady may need another lady providing a reference for her another day And if you look on many ladies' websites, there is a blue ribbon icon with reference provider. The ladies are happy to provide references to deserving gentlemen, it is in the end for their benefit. RG 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Phaedrus 209521 Report post Posted July 4, 2012 When a lady gives her blessing to act as a reference. What's the usual procedure? What is the communication flow? Is it: What I've usually done in the past is: contact the reference SP to check that she's OK with providing one, and to tell her who the reference would be for wait for her to reply (this has never taken very long) then contact the new SP and provide the reference. So you don't contact the new SP at all until the reference is already sorted out, and you can put it in your initial PM/email/whatever and make yourself look like the kind of guy who can follow instructions. Also, the reference SP doesn't get anything coming out of the blue. The downside to this is that it takes time, and it probably wouldn't work that well if you were desperate to see the new SP *right now*. However, I generally don't have an issue with getting organized a bit in advance if needs be... and this is only for the first time you see someone. I've always found the CERB ladies to be very good with references - whenever I've asked for one I've always had a reply within 24 hours or so, and frequently a lot faster than that. Another concern is when it has been many months that you've seen the reference SP and/or you don't hobby often Yes, this may be a concern. I always try to use someone I've seen relatively recently as a reference. In general, as long as things went well, do the ladies always agree to act as references? All the CERB ladies I've asked have been awesome with this. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PatrickGC 10792 Report post Posted July 4, 2012 Hello one and all!: As a client with a, physical disability [Cerebral Palsy] of SP over the years and a new member here on CERB safety and security of all involved has always been of paramount importance. From my perspective as a client it is essential that everything is researched and disclosed before the first date. There is a huge trust component here, the worker has to do a lot more than on an average of date. So the security and reference issues are double-sided, and equally important. However, as mentioned earlier in the thread we do not have access to the same security checks as a mainstream business or consumer would. But if new clients and workers had a probationary period during which time a dialogue and peer review would take place in an online forum. This would help alleviate, fear and misconceptions. There need not be any personally identifiable information released. The emphasis would be on articulating needs and expectations. If this learning curve deliberately took a while it would go a long way toward weeding out the "bad apples". The mainstream media has for years submerge this industry in an ocean of stereotypes. So it is essential that clients and workers alike insist on some form of due diligence. What needs to be focused on now is creating a framework on how to do this collectively as workers and clients. Patrons on sex workers who can should also speak publicly on some level. This will go a long way toward humanizing and legitimizing not only this industry but an entire range of related health-care issues. Often in my humble opinion, a marvelous time with a sex worker can be the best health.-Man Have I Known Some Great People! PatrickGC PS: the above was written using voice dictation. Please excuse any typos which may have slipped through. 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
etasman2000 15994 Report post Posted July 4, 2012 However, as mentioned earlier in the thread we do not have access to the same security checks as a mainstream business or consumer would. But if new clients and workers had a probationary period during which time a dialogue and peer review would take place in an online forum. This would help alleviate, fear and misconceptions. There need not be any personally identifiable information released. The emphasis would be on articulating needs and expectations. If this learning curve deliberately took a while it would go a long way toward weeding out the "bad apples". In a way we have this here on CERB, based on both crowd sourcing and trail of trust. Crowd sourcing by way of recommendation. Trail of trust by informal discussions with other hobbiest and SP. And yes, SPs do recommend other SPs. At times someone has to take-one-for-the-team, and some hobbiest prefer that role. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
northerntantra 4671 Report post Posted July 4, 2012 The mainstream media has for years submerge this industry in an ocean of stereotypes. So it is essential that clients and workers alike insist on some form of due diligence. What needs to be focused on now is creating a framework on how to do this collectively as workers and clients. Lot's of great thoughts in PatrickGC's post, but I'd like to pick out this one for further comment. I do see a softening of attitudes in mainstream media, particularly newspapers, towards sex workers who ply their trade in private. The courts and legislators also seem to be working towards balancing the freedom to associate and engage in adult activities against the need to protect individuals and society from the dual harms of exploitation and exposure (of sexual matters) to minors. The recent Supreme Court of Ontario decision to strike down key elements of current prostitution laws is an example of how the courts are beginning to weigh protection of sex workers more heavily in their decisions. The existing laws attempt to ban undesirable effects of the sex trade -- such as having an openly public brothel in your nice family-oriented neighbourhood -- while not explicitly making sex between consenting adults (with or without payment) an illegal activity. There is considerable fear, however, that law makers will respond to the latest court decision by creating laws that head us back in that direction. I think the courts, though, have shown signs that they want the laws improved (for the protection of workers) not returned to an earlier state (where sex for money is outlawed). But the lawmakers are composed of people who live in our society, are influenced by it, and whose jobs are at the discretion of the public. It becomes easier for them to change laws if the changes stand a good chance of being supported by the electorate and general public opinion. Which is why we need more people, on both sides of the sex trade, to speak up and counter the negative stereotypes. We often say that prostitution is the world's oldest profession, yet Canadian laws don't treat it as one. Sadly, there is still such a stigma attached to sex-for-money that few dare to speak out about it for fear of reprisal at work, at home, or from friends and family. As a parent, it's even more complicated. So, my hat's off to those who have been brave enough to speak up and help change public attitudes. I wish I could join you, but for now, I'll have to stick to supporting you more quietly, from the sidelines, in whatever venue I can find that doesn't jeopardize my job or my personal relationships. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
manitoba 2758 Report post Posted July 4, 2012 As someone who has been burned by ladies not on CERB (no shows, bait and switch etc) I have decided to focus my attention on ladies who are members here and who have some posts and recommendations here as well. I personally would have no issue with a SP only area that rated the guys as dangerous/ avoid, not desirable and OK dates. The dangerous/avoid category is I assume covered in the bad date section, The second would be people with poor hygiene, lack of respect, late etc. and the last category would be for someone on time with the money, clean and respectful. That way we could be categorized by a couple ladies and new contacts could take a look at our history before accepting appointments. As for providing CERB handles, I like to use the site PM system for initial contacts so the lady can, if she wishes, take a look at some of my posts and help her decide that she wants to see me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jack734 309 Report post Posted July 4, 2012 I do not give references I do not feel that it is any one business . and I am taking a risk as well as the sp . But if the lady dose not want to see me that is fine too I will find some one ells . As for hanging up a tittle rude . no matter what the conversation . that is the only problem here If an sp can have a fine business with getting references I am glad for her as I would hope she would be happy for me if I get what I want with out answering that question them 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PatrickGC 10792 Report post Posted July 5, 2012 Lot's of great thoughts in PatrickGC's post, but I'd like to pick out this one for further comment. I do see a softening of attitudes in mainstream media, particularly newspapers, towards sex workers who ply their trade in private. The courts and legislators also seem to be working towards balancing the freedom to associate and engage in adult activities against the need to protect individuals and society from the dual harms of exploitation and exposure (of sexual matters) to minors. The recent Supreme Court of Ontario decision to strike down key elements of current prostitution laws is an example of how the courts are beginning to weigh protection of sex workers more heavily in their decisions. Northerntantra: I believe the Harper government immediately announced that it would appeal the Ontario High Court decision, and it is expected to go all the way to the Supreme Court of Canada eventually. You are correct lawmakers and politicians live in our society and are influenced by it. This is why it is so important for the sex worker community to set standards for conduct, service, and communication far above what is expected. We must each in our own way encourage people to see the humanity in both the worker and client. This does not mean one has to go out waving banners and flags jeopardizing one's privacy. Often subtle nudges which do not threaten but encourage people to ask questions can make profound changes over time. In everyone's family tree there is some relative which has been directly involved or affected by sex work in one fashion or another. I have talked to enough people over the years to know that everyone has met someone in the industry, they just don't know it. Take any large size apartment building in Vancouver and you'll find a home based business. As a community we can encourage discussion directly. Individuals can do the same thing in directly by identifying biases and encouraging wider more inclusive alternate perspectives. Let the creativity flow! [spontaneous thought: At a party, dressed the guys up as sex workers and set the women up as clients. A little role-play, a drop of wine, blend well with discussion.] Sorry, getting a little off-topic. I will start a thread, if one doesn't already exist, when my probationary period ends. Take care, PatrickGC Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cyndall_Kent 6880 Report post Posted July 5, 2012 Well put, thanks for sharing. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MisterMike 1873 Report post Posted August 18, 2012 I can't understand why you wouldn't want to provide your CERB handle......I was lucky enough that a well respected SP took a chance with me but I was prepared. ......Since then she has provided me with refererences when needed but I still am grateful she took a chance. I guess in the end it comes down to the lady's personal comfort level. As a new hobbyist this is the dilemma I face. I am not in a position to reveal my true name and telephone number but understand and endorse the need to SP security and safety. I hope that a SP will do the same for me so I can build up a couple of references and enjoy the hobby to the fullest. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SamanthaEvans 166767 Report post Posted August 19, 2012 As a new hobbyist this is the dilemma I face. I am not in a position to reveal my true name and telephone number but understand and endorse the need to SP security and safety. I hope that a SP will do the same for me so I can build up a couple of references and enjoy the hobby to the fullest. MisterMike, it's up to you to decide what you are and are not willing to reveal about yourself. However, do keep in mind that established paid companions often meet with well-known men whose public and private lives could be severely damaged if their information were to be disclosed to anyone. Our fees include assurance of confidentiality. I see that you live in the States. Law enforcement does have a habit of setting men up for grief, there, because prostitution is illegal almost everywhere. In Canada, things are very different! You can learn about this in the Legal section. You may be able to find a lady who will waive many screening aspects or who doesn't have any. The value of her reference, for those who require references, may be limited, however. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites