Are there more swingers??

[Guest *l**e]

I'm not sure if it's simply because I personally know more of them, or if it is due to the internet making things so public, or if it is actually just becoming more common, but it seems to me there are way more people in open relationships, etc today than ever before.

 

I have several friends who swing, and I get more calls than ever from men who want to watch me with their wives or girlfriends.

 

I'm not complaining at all!! I am wondering what you all think.

[Guest webothscore]

It does very much seem like a sex crazed world. I attribute all of it to the countless stressful variables of everyday life. Different forms of sexual healing to combat the various stresses....

[Miss S. Lane 67128]

I would like very much to believe that it is simply because the general population is becoming more enlightened, more aware.

 

Monogamy is not natural. Those who believe it is need to recognize that strict sexual fidelity is a lofty but perhaps fundamentally doomed aspiration.

 

Just look at the rise in divorces, and the number of "celeb" stories about infidelity. Tiger Woods was ridiculed for his multiple sex partners. Justin Bieber gets thrown to the media wolves for hiring a sex worker. Looking at mammals alone (as yes, even we humans are animals), 3-5% practice some form of monogamy, and even then there are limits. Even Emperor Penguins mate with one penguin for a year, and then move on. :)

 

From a chemical and biological standpoint, sexual monogamy depends not just on particular hormones that are released in the brain, but on receptors for these hormones. Among humans, we have the chemicals and the receptors, but it varies from person to person how much we have. Based on brain wiring alone, inclination toward fidelity can vary dramatically from one individual to another.

 

Quite simply, SEX is as necessary to humans as eating and breathing. And with the apparent surge in the swingers lifestyle, I am thrilled to think that couples, who chose to be together on the long term, have realized that while their hearts are committed to each other, they can still explore their sexual fantasies without "cheating". What's more, it VERY often ends up teaching them trust in each other, increasing communication between them, and improving their own PERSONAL sex life tenfold!!!

 

Women and men BOTH have a desire to "stray" or "explore". Swinging allows couples to do just that, and what's more, they can do it TOGETHER.

[Cute0aza0Button 21399]

I think that sexuality is getting more accepted - that translates in to people being more honest about their sexuality. I don't think that there are more swingers, open or polyamourous relationships (HUGE difference) but I think that there are more people admitting that they are in one.

 

The more we show people that "normal" people have the relationships the more people will admit to them. Nobody wasnt to be that freak with the weird sex life right?

 

Personally, I have done the swinger thing but have wayyy too much jealousy to do the open on poly thing. Im all for random sex but I believe i8n monogamous relationships.

 

I had friends (1 woman, 2 guys) who succeeded at living together in a poly house for years very happily.

 

I think we need to admit that it is normal to want to do different people. We can't be expected to stick to the same monogamous rules from a thousand years ago. Life expectancy isn't 30 years any more and it is a lot to ask of someone to have sex with only one person for 60+ years.

 

When we push these antiquated ideas on people they just feel bad about fantasizing about others. then they hide it from their partners. then they cheat. Is that what we want? Ill take my partner hooking up for sex with someone else and being ho nest before i deal with the lies and the drama that goes wwith cheating.

 

maybe thats just me

[Guest S*rca****sid]

I think it all comes down to the internet and communications in general. I'm sure there are more swingers than ever before, but there are more people in the world than ever before.

Because it's so easy to meet and connect with people who share the same ideas and outlook on life, it might give the appearance there are more swingers. Similarly to the number of people who identify as being gay or lesbian. Most reports state that only 10% of the population is gay or lesbian, but it might appear higher because of the media attention.

[foofer 217]

Here's a view from someone that recently managed a swing club.

 

There are a lot more posers now than ever before. It used to be that people would go to a club to play or at least dip their toes in the water. Now, everybody wants to watch and judge. It's like "hey honey, let's join this club so we can get excited watching people have sex, and then go home and fuck!". All they want is to be spectators in a "naughty" atmosphere. They'll call themselves swingers, but have never participated due to them endlessly waiting to find the perfect couple. "We have high standards!"

 

There'll be a few that are more adventurous and actually make out with their mates in the same room as someone else. The girls might (gasp!) kiss each other or feel each others boobs! Those sluts!

 

If I had to give numbers, I'd say 70% of people calling themselves swingers are really just spectators, 10% do the same room, girl only, pretend to be naughty thing, 10% are soft swap - meaning same room or a little oral with lots and lots of rules, and 10% are full on old style swingers.

 

That last 10% is slowly dwindling. Being a swinger is about sharing, not just putting on a show for some stranger to perv on. When everyone you have an interest in playing with says "we're just here to watch", you give up trying. Most clubs I travel to are now filled with people spending the whole night waiting for the show to start, then going home disappointed. Even the Vegas clubs are like this.

 

Being a bi woman is so last year. Now swinging, open relationships and hall passes are all the "new thing" to be into. Unfortunately, the noobs trying to call themselves swingers are changing the definition of the word.

 

So when you hear someone saying they're a swinger, take it with a grain of salt. Ask for details, like "what's it like to watch another guy unload in your wife/girlfriend?" Then sit back and watch them squirm and back peddle.