Guest c**io**m7 Report post Posted February 15, 2014 We have all made a decision at some point in our lives...it could be simple, it could be complex but, it was a decision you needed to take and everyone around you called you crazy. Feel free to share. Recently, I was offered a NSA FWB arrangement by a very nice lady in my office building and I said "no". As she is regularly ogled by my coworkers, I am now labelled as crazy. ;-) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
qwertyaccount 15793 Report post Posted February 17, 2014 That wasn't crazy because it was a question out of the blue that you didn't have time to think about and saying no was a normal professional reaction. What makes you are crazy is that you haven't gone back to her to see if you can change your no into a yes :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CuriousMatt 660 Report post Posted February 17, 2014 I say not crazy. I would have said not as well. What happens if/when the relationship ends. Sometimes everything is just fine. But what happens if there are hurt feelings and you have to see each other every day? It is a risk, is it a risk worth losing your job over? Or her losing her job for that matter? Only you can decide. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest c**io**m7 Report post Posted February 17, 2014 I say not crazy. I would have said not as well. What happens if/when the relationship ends. Sometimes everything is just fine. But what happens if there are hurt feelings and you have to see each other every day? It is a risk, is it a risk worth losing your job over? Or her losing her job for that matter? Only you can decide. You hit the nail on the head! There are other factors involved however, the key is not creating workplace drama, or worse. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest P**aq Report post Posted February 17, 2014 You did the right thing, in my opinion. I would have said no as well. I try to keep my work and social life fairly separate and dipping the pen in the company ink is something I avoid at all costs. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Wolf Knight 29667 Report post Posted February 17, 2014 In this situation I'm with everyone else in saying you made the right decision. never mix business and pleasure. FWB.....scenarios can be great in the right circumstances just not at the office. I got a beautiful 27 year old employee a new job with another company once after she made advances. If I kept her there I would have eventually given in and made a huge mess. Not worth it. If you want to do FWB....make sure there is enough distance (physical distance as well as life situation distance) to cause it to be great when you're together but it's difficult to make it happen "regularly". If it becomes too regular, my friend you have a girlfriend and not a FWB. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dantan69 162 Report post Posted February 17, 2014 Been there done that and it lasted for 20 plus years and we are still friends 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ice4fun 78407 Report post Posted February 17, 2014 Everyone needs to make decisions that reflect their own reality so what is right for someone else may not be right for me. To each their own and who gives a flying fuck what someone else thinks is crazy. Just my opinion 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frank7 3939 Report post Posted February 18, 2014 My co-workers (50 and 60) think i'm crazy cause I check ladies close to their age. They say i should be checking the Young 20s while i still have a chance. Haha. Good thing, the new co-worker totally understand checking girls of all ages. ;) And yes, as someone who only get sexy time here, i think you're crazy. =P Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
6dave9 4008 Report post Posted February 18, 2014 (edited) We have all made a decision at some point in our lives...it could be simple, it could be complex but, it was a decision you needed to take and everyone around you called you crazy. Feel free to share. Recently, I was offered a NSA FWB arrangement by a very nice lady in my office building and I said "no". As she is regularly ogled by my coworkers, I am now labelled as crazy. ;-) So C7.. so let me get this straight...you had a lovely lady offer you what most of us attached sexually deprived guys is starving for aaaaand you said -no- Hmmm ok i'll buy that for a buck.. (knowing what you have been through as of late.. cant say I blame you at all...) my question is...(assuming all this has turned into office gossip, or a I mistaking?) who let the cat out of the bag for you to be labeled crazy..??? As for me, I dont believe I would have been as quick to turn down the offer.. ;-) D. Edited February 18, 2014 by 6dave9 grammatics Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest c**io**m7 Report post Posted February 18, 2014 So C7.. so let me get this straight...you had a lovely lady offer you what most of us attached sexually deprived guys is starving for aaaaand you said -no-Hmmm ok i'll buy that for a buck.. (knowing what you have been through as of late.. cant say I blame you at all...) my question is...(assuming all this has turned into office gossip, or a I mistaking?) who let the cat out of the bag for you to be labeled crazy..??? As for me, I dont believe I would have been as quick to turn down the offer.. ;-) D. Actually, recent events had much less to do with my decision than you might think but...simply put...my heart belongs somewhere else and the risk of her attachment and subsequently having to step away is not fair to her. Also, I am just not yet ready to get naked with a woman who is not a certain woman, if that makes sense. How did the cat get out of the bag? It seems gossip took over when she told a female coworker about her interest in me...it was recommended she approach me and, I am assuming word got out when she reported back my answer. Unfortunately, no one seems to know how to keep their mouths shut at the office. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
6dave9 4008 Report post Posted February 18, 2014 Actually, recent events had much less to do with my decision than you might think but...simply put...my heart belongs somewhere else and the risk of her attachment and subsequently having to step away is not fair to her. Also, I am just not yet ready to get naked with a woman who is not a certain woman, if that makes sense. How did the cat get out of the bag? It seems gossip took over when she told a female coworker about her interest in me...it was recommended she approach me and, I am assuming word got out when she reported back my answer. Unfortunately, no one seems to know how to keep their mouths shut at the office. Ah.. Rightoh... Actually it makes perfect sense...totally get it. :-) as for the office wild fire... I can only sympathize.... One at at a time my friend! Cheers D. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
qwertyaccount 15793 Report post Posted February 18, 2014 Actually, recent events had much less to do with my decision than you might think but...simply put...my heart belongs somewhere else and the risk of her attachment and subsequently having to step away is not fair to her. Also, I am just not yet ready to get naked with a woman who is not a certain woman, if that makes sense. How did the cat get out of the bag? It seems gossip took over when she told a female coworker about her interest in me...it was recommended she approach me and, I am assuming word got out when she reported back my answer. Unfortunately, no one seems to know how to keep their mouths shut at the office. Offices are just school yards for adults - gossip happens weather it is overt or clandestine. Your having a SO, or someone that you want to be your SO completely changes things. No, you're not crazy for passing on this opportunity, and if you handled it correctly with something like "If it weren't for the fact that I have a girlfriend..." the door is still open should things not work out with the other lady. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest c**io**m7 Report post Posted February 18, 2014 I don't completely regret saying no but, damn, every time I see that ass walk by...oh mama...lol Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites