fortunateone 156618 Report post Posted April 14, 2014 I just have rates that are based on the 20s coming out of ATMs. I don't have a 150 rate, for that reason, even tho maybe 150 or 250 makes more 'sense' so to speak, for this purpose it really doesn't. Same as having a half hour at 125 or even 130, that to me sounds like maybe, slightly, someone thought about it seriously knowing that someone is going to come with multiples of 20s and not ask for change. i am left with that impression, even if it is not the intention lol. But in general, if you don't want to give the extra as tip, bring the correct amount, it is clear in her ads or conversation what that is. Bring an additional bill or two if you think it is possible you might want to voluntarily tip, but many of us do not keep cash on the premises, and if we do, it is most likely also multiples of 20s and so unlikely we will have a 5 or 10 hanging around. Larger bills tend to be an exception. if someone brings 2 x 100, and then on arrival decides on a half hour at 120, clearly they are going to need change or the sp will be looking at giving an involuntary discount lol. Some guys are fairly clueless tho, if they are new to this. One guy showed up asking 'you take debit?" well, no I don't not for this anyway. same with CCs, it is a cash based biz, and you are not going to a business location with CC processors or reception desks, and cash registers, so exact change is always the best way to ensure you are not giving an involuntary tip. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Phaedrus 209521 Report post Posted April 17, 2014 So, yes. Some folks are stretching their finances by seeing SPs. They may not be able to afford any more than the rate the lady they're seeing charges. Fair enough. I'm not going to judge anybody on the basis of their financial situation. However... although we might talk about money here on the board, we put a lot of effort into not doing so when we meet. Ladies don't like having to ask for the envelope. We guys don't like it much if she counts the money in front of us. We may vary in how much we dislike those things, but I don't think very many people think of them positively. Talking or thinking about the money ruins the fantasy that we work so hard to maintain. But then... you ask for change. This tells me two things: first, that you're too lazy to get hold of the right amount in advance; second, that you care little enough about a provider's feelings that you're prepared to put her through the awkwardness of dealing with it. Really, it's not hard to have the right money. No matter what the ATM spits out, is it really so difficult to make sure you have 10s and 20s in your wallet so you can make the envelope up to the right amount? All you have to do is... not spend them for a couple of days beforehand. And as for asking for change... so you not understand that we're dealing with a fantasy here, and that doing so destroys it? Do you not realize that even if you don't care, she might well do? Can you not work this out, or do you simply not care how she feels? As I said, I won't judge you based on your financial situation... but I have no problem with judging you for other things: firstly for your laziness, and secondly for either your selfishness or your stupidity, whichever applies. 6 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ann Gallerie 7910 Report post Posted April 17, 2014 Hi there, I'm sure many of us have been to the restaurant where the server asks if they should bring change, or returns with a stack of small bills and change. It's another way to squeeze out a tip. Now it's possible, even on a queenly amount, that the client expects change, and when he doesn't get it, he's possibly - just possibly - going to get a bit of a sour impression. If we were paid by credit card, transfer, or whatever, it would be the exact amount. Why should things be different for cash? He may very well wave the change and say it's yours, but that's his call. Easy enough to keep a few fivers around to solve any potential misunderstandings 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
aimtoplease1 1839 Report post Posted April 17, 2014 Hi there, I'm sure many of us have been to the restaurant where the server asks if they should bring change, or returns with a stack of small bills and change. It's another way to squeeze out a tip. Now it's possible, even on a queenly amount, that the client expects change, and when he doesn't get it, he's possibly - just possibly - going to get a bit of a sour impression. If we were paid by credit card, transfer, or whatever, it would be the exact amount. Why should things be different for cash? He may very well wave the change and say it's yours, but that's his call. Easy enough to keep a few fivers around to solve any potential misunderstandings I have to agree with you. In saying that I still don't expect change. A thank you would be nice. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Regent 35404 Report post Posted April 18, 2014 I have never been asked for change. I would feel it was rude and inconsiderate if a client showed up and asked for change. I do not keep cash on site and I'm very clear on my website about arriving with the correct amount, pre-counted in an envelope. Showing up and asking for change says to me that you aren't considerate enough to follow simple directions, which is not a good way to start off a session. It would feel cheap to me because it says that the client considers their $10 more important that respecting my business practices, showing up prepared and not imposing expectations on me that we didn't agree on. I understand being poor - many times I've been at a place in life when $10 is really significant. I understand having a busy schedule or having mobility issues that might make getting change difficult. I don't ever expect to be paid more than the agreed upon amount. If a client couldn't bring the correct amount and discussed it with me ahead of time, I would feel respected and would be happy to make sure I had change on hand. It's not the $10 that's significant, and it's not even about shifting the focus to money. For me, it's all about the consideration and respect in how it's approached. (All of my fees are in increments of $20, to make things simpler.) 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cinelli 22184 Report post Posted April 18, 2014 It's the men who walk in, roll off the $20's from a wad of cash that they always seem to have and then stand there expectantly Those guys, ugh. They aren't worried about the money, they are just control freaks. You see them everywhere, being jerks to cashiers, waiters, probably their mailman too! 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest ***t***iv*** Report post Posted April 19, 2014 if I give you more (time, service, satisfaction etc) than agreed to, can I get that (time, service, satisfaction etc) back from you? I might need it for my next client. :P if I am at a bar and you give me a twenty to go buy myself a drink, I say thank you, buy a drink, tip my server and keep the rest, unless you want a drink too. Then, I'll buy you one too, but I still keep the change. you gave me the twenty, it's mine now :) there's no takebacks. especially when you are trying to get some, guys. you know this. you probably don't even care if it means you might get laid, right? be honest. If you needed the change so bad, you would have went and bought the drinks yourself and got your change back. that's what I would do. once you put money in my hand, it never ever leaves me. I am not sorry if this sounds harsh either because this industry can be just that on the lady. I have heard of clients stealing ladys payment back at the end of an encounter. (don't leave your purse unattended ladies) I had a friend return money for a service that didn't work out (greek). I have had clients ask me for money back. I never bring money with me because I don't want to risk getting robbed by some d-bag @sshole. Even if you make a mistake and overpay, that becomes a tip for me that makes my experience (and consequently yours) better. next time, you will have the exact amount if you cant afford to spend more. when a client asks a lady for money back (doesn't matter the context the result is the same), you have taken what the lady gets out of her efforts, away from her. do you lose what you gain, gained or are going to gain? no. so why should she? if you cancel after you have seen my face, I require half my donation to compensate just for that. so by that standard, only half my rate covers my time. the majority of it simply covers my exposure; me showing you the face of a lady in the sex trade. we (for the most part) hide our faces in photos for a reason. everything else is consequently covered by the rest. that means a lot for a little. I charge a reasonable rate and I believe that every lady is worth a lot more than any sum of money. so you are getting a good deal no matter what the rate, change, tip etc. because if I could put any price on what I think the service I provide is worth, no one but the fortune 500 could afford it. no one is getting gypped here. even though I know I am worth everything, I don't ask you to give me everything. I ask for an amount that will leave me as satisfied as I will leave you. this is a very unique service in that the lady gives herself to you, the client. she can never take back what she gave to you. she gives it willingly.. so when you give her that envelope willingly, it is inconsiderate to expect anything back from it. you know what you are 'getting back' for your funds. and its not 'some of those funds back'. under any circumstance. the waitress serving your food doesn't expose her naked body to you (but wouldn't it be somethin' if she did?), and you don't typically ask her for change. you tell her to keep it, because you want to show her she is appreciated for what she did for you. its your way of saying thanks, on top of actually saying thanks. words don't mean as much if you don't have any action behind it. you can smile and thank me but if you ask for your change back I think you were unsatisfied, even though you weren't. women. :P i love us but we think weird. it's ok, you probably didn't know. when you leave, do I get my time back if you didn't use it all? no. It's just gone, including the time it took to get ready (and unready after) for you. Like the extra money you gave me. you, the client, do this solely for your enjoyment. we do this to get by, our enjoyment is merely a bonus. like the extra money you gave me. if we were doing this solely for our enjoyment, we wouldn't require a donation. my friend that offered greek, she felt so low after she gave money back by mistake. she puts herself out there, in a position that socially is degrading to women, to literally take it in the ass. and because her client couldn't 'complete the pass' she felt bad and reimbursed him. then she went home and realized she got the shit end of the stick. I think that, because the lady is the one who puts her emotional and physical health on the line to provide this service, she should never have to feel like she gave more than she received. if a client doesn't complete, does he get a refund? no. because it doesn't change anything on the lady's part. She still put herself at your disposal (excuse the crudeness it is for emphasis not how it really is because we all respect ourselves and don't do things we don't want to) and still has to live with the knowledge. best if that knowledge is of getting what you deserve. I doubt many clients feel like what they get in return, isn't worth the donation they made. can you imagine how the lady who got her money stolen afterwards felt? cheated, used, terrible about herself, worthless and more awful things no one should feel, especially in this line of work. I understand this is not the exact scenario, but as I mentioned the result is the same. when you, the client, ask me for change back or you overpaid and want that 50 back (haha drunky you snooze you lose), I hear, you are only worth the exact amount you requested not a penny more. I wouldn't give it back anyway, but if I did, then I'd be stuck feeling less good about myself. Plus I would feel cheap, and I'd remember that your words contributed to that feeling, even if you didn't intend for that to happen, as I am sure none do. But I would not look forward to seeing you again. what we, the providers, need in order to do our jobs is sound mental health and a sense of confidence and feeling of self worth. Because sometimes the job (moreso society's perception of the job) takes away from those confident feelings. when that happens, the monetary compensation you the client provided fills that tank right back up and we are happy happy happy again! oh, I felt sad for a minute? not anymore because I am counting dollars and providing for myself, by myself. that is empowering and a big big reason why we do this. it's for us too, just sometimes in different ways than it is for you. someone calls me a whore? hey hey, at least i'm getting paid.. for what you do for free. slut. (kidding! if you wanna be free, be free, it doesn't bother me!) and ask yourself this: what woman would want to put on a smile after you take money out of her hand? if shes not spending it herself, on herself, it just doesn't happen. in general, most people leave their change as a tip. so, yeah, if the lady pouring you your coffee gets to keep your change, I should definitely have earned the change as a tip, too. and if you need your change back from a coffee, sure, you must need your change back from our encounter more than I need it. but that won't change that my mental health is what takes the hit from having to give change back. to a smaller degree, the coffee lady feels bad if you ask for your change back too. she thinks, I guess I didn't deserve the change, I didn't do something good enough or I am not good enough at what I do to deserve it. It sucks that that's how we feel about ourselves, that we need to be rewarded to feel we are worthy, but that is what happens. Or, she thinks you are a miserable old scrooge. those are your options in asking a SP for change. bruno mars says it best lol 'money makes her smile' so, don't ask for change back, but throw in an extra five. there is a lady giving her all to make you feel good. make her feel good too. you guys know the way to a lady's heart. it's in your wallet. <truth hurts? well, as much as you wish it was, your penis isn't always it's own reward :)> service provider, wife, girlfriend, friend. its all the same. you show us you value us by what you give back. gifts, cash (mostly for SP's but you give your wife or girl money too when she needs it), trips, clothes, flowers etc. its tradition. and far be it from us to shit on tradition :) peace Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Carrie Moon 68826 Report post Posted April 19, 2014 I am happy to see short notice clients. I have several who only have a quick window of time to see me and when I can be available.. no problem.. These are not the type who plan ahead. If they have to stop and get correct change it bites into our time and they may not be able to see me. I'm okay with getting these guys change for 10-20 bucks if I have it handy. They are okay not getting it if I don't. It's the ones that feel entitled that ladies are referring to as cheap. If you are the former.. you are feeling slighted that ladies might think you are 'cheap'. Thinking ahead isn't always possible when someone thinks with their 'little head'. I don't mind those types of clients for the most part. I'm a go with the flow kind of girl if respect is foremost in the intention. As for disabled clients.. most of mine are so disabled that an attendant has the fee put away for me somewhere discrete. The client doesn't even handle the money! I recently even had a female friend of mine who contributed funds for a disabled neighbor of hers in her building so he could afford to see me! So I don't see what being disabled or financially challenged has to do with it.. they prepare even more than the able bodied person for a visit.. certainly not a fly by the seat of their pants encounter. I've never needed to give a disable person change. 99% of my clients are fully abled..thankfully those that ask for change.. I mention I will look for it at the end and quickly get back to other things.. so I'm not distracted. I search after.. while I put my robe on and they are getting dressed.. no time wasted. 5 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryan sawler 130 Report post Posted April 19, 2014 That's just me. Come preparededed. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Johnny Canuck 5347 Report post Posted April 20, 2014 Although I don't personally ask for change when on an date with a lady, but this day in age I can see why one may ask for change primarily due to financial reasons and money is tight. But that being said, if a customer was that concerned, they could always have the exact donation amount to avoid that situation. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryyno911 418 Report post Posted April 23, 2014 Really. For what you are receiving from one of these fine ladies you are concerned about your $10????? Would a $10 tip be too much on a $200 plus/less service? If you paid even $100 at a restuarant would you leave exact change? I can't believe this has even been asked. If you feel the need to pay the exact amount only then take the time to collect the exact amount. Hard not to be discouraged by the topic. Have a great day ladies. 6 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Exotic Touch Danielle 31729 Report post Posted April 26, 2014 I have had one gentlemen ask me for change lol which was only a $10 bill...he was young and probably tight for cash but it was a little embarrassing having to change it ... I was kind of taken back when he asked...but hey its his money and I defiantly had no problem changeing it for him. I would just recommend you come with the exact amount to avoid anyone feeling any way 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cinelli 22184 Report post Posted April 26, 2014 I would just recommend you come with the exact amount to avoid anyone feeling any way I'd be too embarrassed to ask even if I was flat broke. No doubt it is embarrassing or uncomfortable for the lady as well. I always go to an ATM and put it in an envelope. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites